DEMURALIST's SparkPeople Blog DEMURALIST's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Learned something about myself The more I act like this is a diet the more it feels like a diet, so I am going to stop acting like it is a diet and go back to making it my Way Of Eating. Eating LC was so easy until I stopped focusing on eating real food that was also low carb and started focusing on trying to get the exact combination that would make me lose weight. And so I am back to eating real food that happens to be low carb. It makes me feel healthier and not hungry and I hope that it will also make me thinner. Tue, 2 Aug 2011 22:28:34 EST LCing it, and my weight goals Man, I feel really good. Love this Way Of Eating. <BR> <BR> So now that I am getting the newness of this under my belt and I am settling in to what works for me, I have noticed a few things. <BR> <BR> Now that I now longer have to deal with hunger, either at the cellular level or in my stomach, I don't eat when I am not hungry. So no "emotional" eating. For me, looking, back, I suspect that very little of my eating was emotional. I am thinking that the starvation at the cellular level... Sun, 31 Jul 2011 14:56:57 EST Day 12 Well I think I have come to the conclusion I cannot work induction. Not sure why but there it is. <BR> <BR> That does not mean I give up on the Low Carb lifestyle by any means. I think it means I am going to have to figure out which carbs don't sit well with me, how much protein I need and where to get it, and how much fat do I need and where do I get it. <BR> <BR> So while today is day 12 of LC, it is the start of the experiment. I will take copious notes, by tracking what I eat, so I c... Sat, 9 Jul 2011 07:48:52 EST Day 4 and My Goals So, I started "official" induction 4 days ago. I have lost 2 pounds and I hit ketosis this morning. It is actually a lot easier than I thought it would be, but I have kind of eased into it. I started to Low Carb a couple of months ago but was derailed by a hospital stay and a round of prednisone after that. <BR> <BR> So I picked up the book (the 2002 version) of Atkins and as soon as I finished reading the chapter on induction I decided to start it. <BR> <BR> I feel good, have not r... Fri, 1 Jul 2011 13:45:01 EST what I am learning as much as we would like for it to be true, I feel pretty confident that each of us has to figure out for ourselves what works and what doesn't. <BR> <BR> On my LowCarb journey I am finding that it is not just the number of carbs, but also the source that counts. At least there seems to be a tipping point in regards the source. So, what to do? <BR> <BR> Well I think back to when I decided to become a vegetarian. Pretty early on I realized that I had to do it if I was going to, no half wa... Sun, 5 Jun 2011 14:13:10 EST Its working! The reboot seems to be successful. I have lost back 4 of the 14 pounds that I gained from the prednisone. Why is it so much harder to lose it back, why don't you just lose it when you stop the medication? why is the sky blue? why can't politicians live within their means if we all have to? why...oops, I digress. <BR> <BR> I like what I did the last 2 days, I basically pre-track....I track what I plan to eat for breakfast, lunch, and snacks, then I use dinner to fill in the blanks. Also... Sat, 21 May 2011 10:15:17 EST Do Over Ok, well I have to admit that I went too far to pick up the lifestyle where I left off. I am pretty sure I have to be following pretty closely with the guidelines for at least the first 2 weeks in order for this plan to really work well. So I am starting over. Today. Well this morning. <BR> <BR> The Ketogenic Mediterranean Life Way. <BR> <BR> <BR> Done very well so far. Kicking a drug addiction is very difficult-and lets admit that sugar to me is a drug, obviously not as bad as h... Wed, 18 May 2011 15:25:24 EST Day6 well day 4 and 5 were a series of transgressions that started with a mindless stuffing of a few vanilla wafers in my mouth as I was making dd a cheesecake for her birthday. It then moved on to taste testing the cheesecake. Then had to make cupcakes for a party, of course had to taste test the batter and the icing, blah blah blah..... <BR> <BR> Today is day 6, the lesson I learned is I can only bake when I have a surgical mask on. I follow a recipe so no need to taste test. <BR> <BR> An... Sat, 14 May 2011 09:11:07 EST Day3 So even though I stayed within my Carb limit I went up 2 pounds. <BR> <BR> I know that weight fluctuates so I am not concerned. But...I did do 2 things that I will stop doing and see if that helps. <BR> <BR> one is that I ate my burger last night on a flat-out- which is a grain, and the second is that I had an Atkins endulge bar- which uses sugar alcohols. <BR> <BR> Currently I am trying to get my INR (for coumeden) into the correct range, and if I don't by Monday I am going to have to ... Thu, 12 May 2011 08:02:41 EST day2 ok, I have to admit right up front, I am no good at tracking, just don't like doing it. So that may end up being one of my biggest challenges here. <BR> <BR> I did well yesterday (33 EC and lost 0.2 of a pound). I was a little light on the veggies (I need to go grocery shopping), and not enough liquid, but did manage to try a new recipe for "bread sticks" made from cauliflower instead of flour and they were very good. Even the meatatarian ate them without knowing what was in them. I thi... Wed, 11 May 2011 07:28:52 EST day 1 Yesterday went pretty well. I did 27 E.C. and it was pretty easy. I had a bit of a sweet craving mid day but managed to stay under my carb count. I am also trying to severely limit my artificial sweetener use as I feel like using them makes me want things sweeter. We will see how that goes. <BR> <BR> I plan to intermittently track my foods, more often in the beginning, I don't love tracking but I think it will be a good way for me to be able to go back to a successful week if I know what ... Tue, 10 May 2011 07:35:20 EST A Ketogenic Mediterranean Life This plan starts out as a very low carb plan -20 to 40 effective carbs. Checking to see if I get into ketosis. Then each week I will add a fruit or veggie to increase my carbs very slightly until I stop losing weight then I will reverse the process to enusre a weekly loss until I reach my goal weight. Then will work on the number that will be appropriate for maintenance. <BR> <BR> I plan to blog regularly so that I will have info on what works what doesn't and what I feel like along the w... Mon, 9 May 2011 12:51:38 EST Continuing the attitude So I am continuing to work on holding myself up as an athlete in training. Its a work in progress. <BR> <BR> I want to thank everyone for their support since I started this part of this very long journey. I have not been sparking for a while, because I committed to being on the computer for only my morning time and that has only allowed me to do my email stuff. I decided that athletes in training just don't spend that much time sitting. <BR> <BR> Today is a snow day, so I have been grant... Mon, 10 Jan 2011 11:14:51 EST Habits for the rest of the year I have noticed when I read blogs of people who have successfully lost and kept off weight, when they talk about "lifestyle change" it is more than just teaching yourself to eat healthfully and exercise every day. It is about a mental shift, total paradigm shift actually. It is so often not about a fat person trying to get thin, it is about being the thin person and letting the body catch up. <BR> <BR> So here I am deciding I am that thin person, my external persona does not show it yet as... Wed, 17 Nov 2010 08:39:37 EST Stop IT! and October's habit <link> </link> <BR> <BR> This is so perfect!!! <BR> <BR> And it is my new motto for eating. <BR> <BR> On a serious note, I forgot about October's Habit. So I am going to start a meditation challenge tomorrow. For 21 days, with Deepok Chopra. <BR> <BR> <link><BR>all </link> <BR> <BR> I am very excited to have found this (thanks Callie!) as it fits in perfectly with my moves toward mindfull living. Mon, 11 Oct 2010 14:27:36 EST October's habit I am just writing a note to myself because I have been thinking of what October's habit should be. Now that I know it is not about the food, and it is not about the weight, and it is not not about the weight, I feel like I need to do something every day that helps me to center myself and makes sure that I have not let things go until they fester. <BR> <BR> I will have to think on what that is going to be. Open to ideas....I still have a few weeks to decide. Tue, 14 Sep 2010 15:06:24 EST a new adventure Our church is beginning a new service. A new type of service. Not contemporary, not traditional, not definable. A way to worship creatively, celebrating music and the visual arts, and attempt to create relationships that will support us on our journey. <BR> <BR> The first service is tonight. <BR> <BR> I am the Visual Arts Director. It has been a long and arduous journey. <BR> <BR> It is very exciting to be given the gift to be a part of something so innovative, something in which th... Sun, 12 Sep 2010 10:20:02 EST it is not about the weight and it is not not about the weight. <BR> <BR> Warning to those sensitive types, this is very personal stuff, and not my usual positive post... <BR> <BR> I just read this chapter in Geneen Roth's Book "Women, Food, and God". <BR> <BR> Things are beginning to click. <BR> <BR> I lost 40 pounds about7 years ago and just hung out there for 5 years. And then in the past 2 years I have gained it all back, plus an extra 5 for good measure. <BR> <BR> The thing is that it is not about the weigh... Sat, 11 Sep 2010 09:20:58 EST awesome things #18 The smell of the air as the seasons change. It just so happens this change is summer to fall, but every change has its own smell. Tue, 7 Sep 2010 08:33:16 EST revisit an old idea I am reminded this morning that if you are not hungry when you start eating then you cannot know when you are full to stop eating. <BR> <BR> Last night my dd and friends made something called "Chocolate Crack" (you do not want to know!). <BR> <BR> I had already eaten dinner, was well satisfied, but thought just one piece. But I wasn't hungry, my body had already given the "I'm satisfied" cue and I had already followed it. My body was trying to tell me to stop, but just like a crack add... Mon, 6 Sep 2010 09:07:18 EST September's Habit So August proved I am still very good at maintaining my weight, even with variations that are less than optimal. <BR> <BR> So here is my progress... <BR> <BR> June's habit was to track most of the time and July's habit was to create a go-to menu for breakfast, lunch and snack. So since I did do that I decided to track only when I deviated from the go-to. And that is working great. August's habit was to creae a deficit in my daily calorie intake of 100-200 calories. I planned to do this ... Thu, 2 Sep 2010 11:38:20 EST A normal person<BR>e_yourself_as_fit_person_no_matter_you<BR>r_size <BR> <BR> this blog came at the perfect time. I am beginning to think there is no such thing as a coincidence! <BR> <BR> I have been thinking lately about how can I really accept myself and still work toward positive change. Those ideas seem to contradict each other. <BR> <BR> However, When I read this blog this morning, I realized it is all about perception. I need to perceive myself as a "no... Thu, 26 Aug 2010 08:18:32 EST Spark Motivator of the Day! Wow. That is just about all I can say. I was named "Spark Motivator of the Day" today. It seems funny to me. The things I do here on Spark are my efforts to keep myself motivated and attempts at helping others see the positive (which of course helps me to see the positive). Many days I feel much less than motivated, but then I come to my Spark teams and I see I am not alone and we are all working to find our path to good health and fitness. <BR> <BR> I have to say that I am inspired b... Tue, 24 Aug 2010 07:39:23 EST Another new beginning I know I have said this before, but today I start fresh. I pick myself back up and start again. <BR> <BR> I have written about how I quit smoking in previous blogs here (basically I just kept trying) and I know that the same methods will work for me in regards to eating. <BR> <BR> When I quit smoking part of what helped me to stop is the belief that I was no longer the type of person who would smoke. <BR> <BR> I am now working on convincing myself that I am not the type of person who is... Sun, 22 Aug 2010 11:53:45 EST My new favorite team! I joined the positive bloggers team here on spark a few days ago. I have to admit that sometimes when I decide I am going to be positive, a little voice in my head says something like "and what will that get you-ignoring the negative stuff?" But in reality, you can only focus on so much in one day. If I spend just a little less focus on weight issues and just a little more focus on the blessings things fall into place. Life is easier. I am happier. <BR> <BR> So for these past few days, ... Wed, 4 Aug 2010 18:38:27 EST awesome things #17 Waking up in the morning and being happy to be alive and getting to live the day I have planned! Life is good! Mon, 2 Aug 2010 08:59:03 EST details for August's new habit-& Awesome thing #15 Today is the first of the month and for me that means I am adding a new habit. (June's habit was post most of the time-July was to create a go to menu for breakfast, lunch and snack). <BR> <BR> August is to create a 100 to 200 daily calorie deficit. It is my intention to be the slowest loser- like the tortoise- and win this race with the habits and attitude needed to not have to start the race over again. <BR> <BR> In July I learned that I can do a very good job of maintaining my weight. ... Sun, 1 Aug 2010 12:31:55 EST note to self part 2 "don't forget that my new habit of the month for June was to track my food most of the time-and keep it up. <BR> <BR> my new habit of the month for July is to try eating like Kim. (same-ish breakfast, lunch, and snack daily, and get my variety at dinner) <BR> <BR> Now all I have to do is try to remember what I planned for August before it gets here! " <BR> <BR> I am doing pretty well with these 2 habits and have kept doing them most of the time. <BR> <BR> Now in July I learned how to main... Sat, 31 Jul 2010 10:02:17 EST on the right track! I started smoking when I was in 8th grade. I started to try to quite smoking the day I graduated from high school at 17. I tried often, some times daily, for years. Finally, the last time worked. It took me until I was 30 years old to successfully quit, and another 20 years until I have gotten past the desire. I kept trying because I knew I was on the right track. There was no way to keep smoking and still support the idea of good health for myself. <BR> <BR> I know I need to lose weig... Sun, 25 Jul 2010 10:11:39 EST An aha moment so last night, as I pondered the numbers on my scale, occurred to me that the scale actually does not move up any faster or easier than it moves down. While it is just a tad bit more enjoyable to eat that extra whatever (name your vice) than it is to leave a little something on my plate, it has no more effect on the scale to do so than not doing so does. <BR> <BR> With my current program of the Slowest Loser, I am working on creating a 100 calorie deficit every day. Using a ... Thu, 22 Jul 2010 08:48:13 EST The right story I cannot believe how well this newsletter continues to fall into the place I am at mentally! <BR> <BR> I am in the beginning of a conversation about what I am going to be like when I reach maintenance. Now since I am a serious member of The Slowest Loser Club maintenance is a few years away, but that doesn't mean I can't practice it so that when I get there I can be really good at it! <BR> <BR> That requires a good story, the right story, a story that encompasses not only how my life sup... Sun, 18 Jul 2010 09:57:07 EST starting to fall into place Well it has been an entire week in which I have actually stayed very close to my program. <BR> <BR> I feel really good. I am going to put the specifics here, so that when I stray I can get back to it. <BR> <BR> I am following my own combination of Paul McKenna's 4 Golden Rules <BR> 1. Eat when Hungry <BR> 2. Eat what I want <BR> 3. Eat consciously <BR> 4. Stop when I am no longer hungry <BR> <BR> And to these rules I have added a WWKD question to my life. The letters stand for What Wo... Sat, 17 Jul 2010 09:59:06 EST great article on handling disappointment <link><BR>e/managing_disappointment.pdf </link> <BR> <BR> excellent article, this guys newsletters are free, and although I did not love his book, his articles are generally spot on. Sun, 11 Jul 2010 10:31:33 EST note to self don't forget that my new habit of the month for June was to track my food most of the time-and keep it up. <BR> <BR> my new habit of the month for July is to try eating like Kim. (same-ish breakfast, lunch, and snack daily, and get my variety at dinner) <BR> <BR> Now all I have to do is try to remember what I planned for August before it gets here! Thu, 8 Jul 2010 15:44:07 EST what am I reflecting I just lifted this from a magazine article, it is excellent food for thought.... <BR> <BR> "People quickly make assumptions about everything you do, all the time. In a room of 300 people, you will have 300 different reputations. You can either accept this fact of life or become miserable trying to alter every single person’s perception, which you can’t do anyway. <BR> <BR> This is what I suggest you focus on now: Tell the people who comment on your weight to get a life. And don’t sugarcoat... Thu, 8 Jul 2010 12:31:05 EST excellent article here is an article about not resisting resistance. In other words something that I actually work on quite often which is to avoid all unpleasantness and discomfort.... <link><BR>e/Don_t_resist_resistance.pdf </link> Mon, 28 Jun 2010 14:56:38 EST lifestyle change part two Yesterday I was busy, actually making a massive dessert (see my photos-cake bite tier), and I spent my day in a way that tells me I am growing up. <BR> <BR> Now in all fairness -a truth in advertising statement...I did wear a surgical mask so that I would not like my fingers or pop one of those little bite sized morsels into my mouth. <BR> <BR> That said... <BR> <BR> I spent the entire day focused on my task. I did stop to have breakfast (spinach and mango smoothie-I am addicted to the... Sun, 27 Jun 2010 13:50:02 EST 1000 awesome things #15 a commitment to myself. To become the awesome I was born to be. Sun, 27 Jun 2010 13:34:31 EST 1000 awesome things #14 Reconnecting with family. <BR> <BR> My cousin and his wife just spent the week here to bring their dd to Vandy. This is a cousin I spent every Sunday with. My grandparents had a small farm and all the cousin and aunts and uncles would go over after church. Sometimes we would do work, sometimes we would play ball, sometimes we would play instruments and dance, sometimes we would go over the hill and pick and eat the grapes or tomatoes or whatever else was in season. We have all gotten mar... Mon, 31 May 2010 21:11:28 EST 1000 awesome things #13 The Bluebird Cafe in Nashville, TN. <BR> <BR> This is a fantastic place. It is a stage for songwriters. A place where we can go and hear fantastic music by the people who write it, and hear them tell their stories. Just saw a fantastic show and it was awesome. Sun, 23 May 2010 15:19:28 EST 1000 awesome things #12 seeing high school seniors thanking their parents. <BR> <BR> Yesterday, our church had what we call Youth Sunday. The high school youth of the church plan and carry out the entire service in what is basically a send off for the seniors and a gift to the church at large. The seniors give mini sermonettes, and each and every one profusely thanked their parents, in detail, for where they are today. At the reception the parents returned the favor and detailed what they thought was wonderful a... Mon, 17 May 2010 17:11:44 EST lifestyle change You hear a lot about lifestyle change. It is just beginning to occur to me what that really means. It is not about talking myself into going to the gym, or reminding myself to eat fruit instead of simple carbs, or watching my calories, or watching my weight, etc. I am thinking that I am on my way to true lifestyle change when these things do not require talking myself into it. It is about seeing myself as the kind of person who makes most of my decisions with the understanding that I am a... Sun, 16 May 2010 10:48:55 EST 1000 awesome things #11 The smell of strong coffee in the morning. <BR> <BR> Even on those mornings I don't have a cup, the smell of fresh ground coffee beans is hard to beat. There are so many wonderful memories attached to that smell, so many conversations with so many people. We used to go to the beach for the weekend with our family, a lot when I lived at home still. Different members would wake up early and sit out on the balcony and drink coffee, watch the sunrise and just chat and tell each other stories.... Sun, 16 May 2010 10:39:06 EST 1000 awesome things #10 Watching people help each other, even when they know there is nothing in it for themselves. <BR> <BR> Living through the rains and floods of the past weekend in Nashville was a very scary thing but getting to see people do heroic, as well as not so heroic, things anonymously without a thought for themselves has been one of the most awesome experiences of my life. Restores faith in humanity. Wed, 5 May 2010 17:24:27 EST 1000 awesome things #9 Getting to live in the greatest city in the world (well that I have been to) Nashville, Tennessee! Fri, 30 Apr 2010 22:26:34 EST 1000 awesome things #8 sweet spring mornings... <BR> <BR> the way the sun glints off the dew on a fresh mowed lawn, birds chirping, the slightly cool breeze pushing the colors of the flowers into a blurred mass of perfume. FANTASTIC> Fri, 30 Apr 2010 08:25:49 EST 1000 awesome things #7 A huge white full moon painted against a midnight blue sky. <BR> <BR> You may note that I am writing this at an un-Godly hour in the morning, I have a toothache that is keeping me up, but it did allow me to look outside and see this amazing sight. <BR> <BR> It reminds me of a birthday gift from dh, probably 10 years ago. We were in New Smyrna Beach Florida, with kids and Sis and her dh and dd, had just finished dinner and we went for a drive south on a deserted stretch of road. It was r... Wed, 28 Apr 2010 04:26:38 EST 1000 awesome things #6 Hitting all the green lights when you are in a hurry. <BR> <BR> And it doesn't hurt if there is also a reasonable parking space! Got the kid to school on time today even though she went back to sleep after the alarm! Tue, 27 Apr 2010 09:28:00 EST 1000 awesome things #5 A field of wildflowers. <BR> <BR> On Sunday afternoon we were driving home along small country roads in Middle Tennessee, and as we came up over a hill and around a curve there was a huge field of beautiful wildflowers, mostly purple but colorful none the less. We actually had our windows down and got to enjoy the fragrance as well. Very special! Mon, 26 Apr 2010 20:12:06 EST 1000 awesome things #4 Having teenage children who are willing to talk to you. <BR> <BR> I have 2 teenagers, and even on their worst days, they are awesome to me. Just finished a long conversation with my daughter, whose best friend just lost her grandmother, it was a surprisingly deep and meaningful conversation, and it reminded me how awesome my kids are. Sun, 25 Apr 2010 12:04:09 EST