DEDICATED2HIM's SparkPeople Blog DEDICATED2HIM's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Puffy Well I am the heaviest I have been in a year and a half. The thing is....I gained 14 lbs in a matter of days. I know for a fact that I have not eaten the 3,000+extra calories necessary to gain a pound in a day...let alone 14!! I have trouble with retaining fluid and I would bet money that this is the problem. What to do about it? Try to reduce the amount of fluids I'm imbibing and that is no easy task for me. But I must. Somehow. And the other thing I can do is to be more faithful at tak... Sun, 10 Dec 2017 18:04:03 EST The Weighting Game Two weeks ago I went to visit my dad for 5 days. It was a gustatory field day. We both like to eat and we both are attempting to lose weight. I had a definite "vacation mindset" and since I can't afford a cruise, I partied by eating my dad's (very good) we went out three times. ALSO, I drank a lot more fluid than I'm supposed to. <BR> <BR> When i got home I was horrified to see that I weighed 204...whereas not long ago I weighed 191. <BR> My belly looked like I was very p... Mon, 23 Oct 2017 11:18:55 EST Imbibing - the ins and outs. Well, I haven't been on Spark for a day or two. I haven't been tracking, nor have I been really watching what i eat. And I'm at the lowest weight I've been since early last spring....following a large weight loss after my mom died in the end of October. So what's the secret? the only thing I can really think of is that I'm on a relatively new (to me) med I'm taking to treat my Rheumatoid Autoimmune Disease. It's an injection that I give myself once a week. Adding that to my Methotrexate... Tue, 26 Sep 2017 03:55:57 EST Can Too Much Water actually KILL You? I spent last weekend in the hospital with hyponatremia (low blood sodium) and low potassium and magnesium. They padded my bed rails with blankets and put me on a heart numbers were so low that seizures and cardiac arrest were real dangers. They got the potassium and magnesium levels improved with IVs but it was too dangerous to give me saline IVs. It can cause the fluid to leave your brain and can actually kill you. So they changed one of my diuretic meds and put me on a SEVE... Sun, 10 Sep 2017 06:36:36 EST Small Goals and Big Plans's been almost a week....most days my calories have been floating around the lower number of my calorie was a bit higher but still over a hundred lower than the upper level in the goal. It looks like I've made it through my steroid course without really pigging out. However, I am struggling with the night time eating. I get up, on average, 3x a night and each time will eat something. Because of this I have to eat precious few calories during the day. <BR> <BR> I've ... Mon, 14 Aug 2017 16:43:50 EST LEGAL Kettle Corn! I recently bought a microwave container with a vented lid to pop popcorn in the microwave, without oil. I dumped the lush whiteness into a bowl and thought, "I don't know why I'm eating this...i want something SWEET. so I had an inspiration. I love kettle corn but it is just too fattening in the popping I thought, I will make my own. I took a bottle of agave with a little spout ...i squirted thin lines of Agave back and forth across the corn....then tossed with my fingers and re... Sat, 29 Jul 2017 02:20:54 EST Heartsick Yesterday I did well. I went to bed with a surplus of available calories which could be spent on the inevitable midnight snack. some point in the night I made a bad decision to head to the kitchen and I made a worse decision to bring a package (full) of chocolate rice cakes to my room. And there..almost in my sleep, i consumed almost all of the package. When I fully woke later I was horrified at what I'd done. But dutifully I tracked it. The total calories for yesterday mad... Sat, 22 Jul 2017 05:39:14 EST Never Saying Die I just had a whole blog written and it was boring even to me. No one wants to read an analysis of my eating and tracking issues. Suffice it to say that I've taken a few missteps away from tracking and my goals and am once more, coming back to center, to correct my course and start anew before I do any more damage. <BR> <BR> I thank God for my Spark friends who keep throwing life lines out to me in the form of goodies and notes on my Spark Page. Even when I don't respond (rude, I know)---t... Tue, 18 Jul 2017 03:54:48 EST The Little Changes that can Change your World I last weighed myself a week ago. And today I weigh the same. While it could be a disappointment, it , however, was not. Because Saturday and Sunday were horribly off kilter...they were so bad I couldn't even track them. I didn't know where to start. My guess is that my weight had dropped a pound or two and then came those two days from the pit of hell and there was then a pound or two gained.. So here I am determined this time not to put anymore weight back on. Time to get moving soli... Mon, 10 Jul 2017 05:55:52 EST 50 Shades of Thin Today is the crossing of the 50 day mark for both spinning the wheel and tracking my food. Well if you read my last blogpost you will know that I randomly gained 5 pounds...for no comprehensible reason. Someone suggested in the team that I lead, that possibly all of the inflammation we suffer with Rheumatoid AutoImmune Disease, adds to our weight with all of the swelling in our joints. That is feasible ---so maybe that's what it was....All I know is that it has taken me maybe a week or two... Tue, 4 Jul 2017 08:01:04 EST A Struggle and a Victory It's been a while since I posted. Not too much to say. Except that the other day--after weighing 192 about 4 days prior....and being spot on my calorie target range....I weighed in at 197!!! WTHeck. Either my scale needs batteries or I am gaining weight on air. I really really wish I could do some aerobic would help my metabolism immensely. I haven't rechecked my weight since then simply because I never think to do it before I have coffee . I need to make a point of checking ... Mon, 26 Jun 2017 07:34:33 EST Overcomer I am an overcomer. The Bible says that I am....therefore it is true. I've overcome a lot in my lifetime. I overcame my schizophrenia so that instead of being in the hospital every time I turned around, visits have become rare. This June makes 2 years since my last (relatively short) hospital stay. <BR> <BR> Because of aggressive treatment with steroids to treat the asthma that was killing me, I gained large amounts of weight. And each time, I LOST that weight. However I have been overw... Sun, 18 Jun 2017 11:42:01 EST HONESTLY? HONESTLY? <BR> Right now I should be cleaning my room, putting the laundry away, taking a shower or washing the dishes. And I’m blogging instead because well, it’s more fun and yet still productive. <BR> <BR> I’ve just been looking over some tracking charts. I just got my 30-day trophy for tracking my food every day. According to the charts, I’ve lost 5 pounds this past month. It seems like the tiniest drop in the bucket. Especially since 20+ pounds melted off me when Mom died. But wha... Wed, 14 Jun 2017 08:22:43 EST God and My Weight Loss Ecclesiastes 9:10a <BR> Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might; <BR> Maybe you, like me have been trying for many years to fight the battle against encroaching obesity…and you are worn out. Maybe you, like me, have lost and regained hundreds of pounds in your life. Maybe you like me, depend on corticosteroids to keep you alive and to manage illness…and they make you gain weight at alarming rates. <BR> No matter the details of our struggles they all boil down to struggl... Sat, 10 Jun 2017 06:15:15 EST OHHHHH NOOOOOOOO! I had just written a blog post that was maybe the best, most important one I’ve ever written…and once again the cyber -devil struck and when I went to post it, it vanished…right out into the cybersphere….I tried all my tricks to regain it…and nope. It was gone. I have repeatedly called on Spark People to have our blogs saved automatically periodically as we write them so that this will stop occurring. Or to provide a "Save" button so that we can manually save them. I DO have a way around it... Sat, 10 Jun 2017 05:13:01 EST Three Weeks Down As I have already explained...the scale told me of a four pound loss and then when I replaced the batteries told me it was only a two pound loss. Well, I did not correct that figure in the weight tracker so today, when I have lost one more pound, it only looks like I've GAINED a pound. Oh well. I was gratified to see another pound gone despite less than stellar food choices. I had a close encounter of a Haagen-Dazs kind with a pint of coffee ice cream. But let's not talk about that now.... Mon, 5 Jun 2017 03:47:06 EST Weigh to Be So, on Wednesday I got up my courage, bit the bullet and got on the scales. And ....WOOOHOO , I had lost 4 pounds from the last weigh in. But hang on...before you celebrate...Yesterday I weighed myself day and only a moderate amount of calories later...and don't you know, the darned scale read a two pound gain over the previous day. NOTHING about that make calories were slightly below the allotted number and yes, I tracked everything that went in my mouth. I just no... Fri, 2 Jun 2017 02:30:37 EST Onward/Forward Well, for two weeks I was going great guns. Every day below the lowest number of my calorie goal or in the very near vicinity. <BR> That is....until today. <BR> It started last night. I was in terrible pain from a very messed up spine and somehow found myself eating everything in sight. Now there isn't much here that is snackable....but I still managed to go way above what I should have...until the point came when my goal calorie limit was not going to be possible. I was disgusted with ... Mon, 29 May 2017 15:40:49 EST A Journey of a Thousand Miles I started out great guns, easily achieving days where I tracked every bite and came in around 1200 calories in a day. But after a week, my calorie intake has crept back up...until there came one night when I was RAVENOUS all night long (and obviously, was awake all night long as well). I felt like I was on steroids...every few minutes my stomach would growl and act like I hadn't eaten all day. Well I ingested so much food that night that it blew my motivation and commitment out the window.... Fri, 26 May 2017 02:33:14 EST Taking Stock--Regaining my losses Last November and December I lost about 25 lbs following the death of my mom. And I maintained that for a number of months. At that time I really felt that Spark People was not helping me. I can do almost no exercise due to an aggressive case of Autoimmune Arthropathy - in other words some combination of RA, and PsA and Sjogrens. I can barely walk let alone exercise. And the meal plan I was following ? well I sort of had no plan, just was eating minimally. And to top off my whole disench... Tue, 16 May 2017 01:51:53 EST The Struggle Against Entropy <BR> <BR> "Steven Pinker recently wrote an essay on how people need to better appreciate the second law of thermodynamics. Specifically, they need to understand that if we don’t actively work to keep chaos at bay, entropy wins. “Closed systems inexorably become less structured, less organized, less able to accomplish interesting and useful outcomes, until they slide into an equilibrium of gray, tepid, homogeneous monotony and stay there,” Pinker writes. “The Second Law of Thermodynamics,” h... Sat, 4 Mar 2017 06:05:24 EST Can't Touch that! I have come to the conclusion that tracking as I go throughout the day or worse yet, tracking my food BEFORE I eat was not helpful. All I could think about all day long was much I'd eaten and how much more I could have before day's end. And every day, the 1200 calories was just not quite enough. So I rebelled. I said "no more tracking...will just try to get satisfied with vegetables so that I could eat MORE and be satiated with fewer calories. And I discovered that, veggies or ... Sun, 26 Feb 2017 05:27:23 EST A Change of Plan I have signed in to Spark People almost 90 days in a row. I have tracked my food for weeks. And I have had some spectacular "fails." Right now I need to reassess. What is working for me? Tracking has worked mainly to show me that I am not making good choices. It has showed me that the food choices that I have been making have too many calories and not nearly enough satiation value. "Satiation" is a term that Dr Joel Fuhrman uses to describe the "fullness factor" can eat 500 calo... Thu, 16 Feb 2017 05:51:28 EST About Face!! I have to share this with you! <BR> I've been straying a bit from the beaten path...but have been doing several things which are apparently paying off. This morning I weighed myself....after I got the courage to open my eyes, expecting to see a five pound gain...I was amazed and delighted to see that I've lost three pounds since my last weigh in!!! I think that what has saved me is when I have a big meal (like a calzone) ....that is all I will eat in the day and in the overnight I may have... Wed, 1 Feb 2017 02:10:35 EST A Vacation from Moderation Last Friday I went grocery shopping and I bought on impulse a package of Klondike Bars thinking that since they were wrapped In single serve wrappers I could control the amount I consume. Well. Let me tell you, my hands aren't the greatest but they could definitely make short work out of unwrapping an ice cream treat! <BR> <BR> And then I went underground. I could not even confess to myself how quickly I went through those 6 frozen confections....let alone put it on a nutrition tracke... Tue, 31 Jan 2017 04:54:28 EST A Recovery from Disaster This week was a nutritional shambles. I hardly consumed any fruits or veggies...did have some berries and an orange. But ate a whole package of smoked almonds. (That is the LAST time I ever buy those). And a smallish bag of sour cream and onion chips (I NEVER eat chips usually-- I don't even like them!) And today two toaster pastries. What is happening? In my very fattest days I never ate this kind of junk. In my fattest days I ate fruits and vegetables. Its like I have a vendetta ag... Tue, 24 Jan 2017 13:51:38 EST Sugar Busting About a week ago I joined the Sugar Busting Challenge. I did it half heartedly...not convinced that I can do it (even though I went for several years without sugar 10 years ago) ---and not really convinced I wanted to. But today I have a new sense of commitment. I can do this. I've recently begun to drink diet soda again after about 10 years without it. I feel badly about this. But I have been really enjoying it. (when I first tasted it after all that time, it tasted vile.) If I keep ... Sun, 8 Jan 2017 06:10:35 EST A New Year; A New Me This year I am really working on inner self as well as the self others see. God has pointed out to me some persistent sins that involve my failure to be totally honest with people...and with myself. I'm finding that my first line of defense against this type of behavior is my own recognition of it and awareness of it. Because as you know, these type of flaws can become so interwoven into our character that we are unaware of them....and repeat them over and over. Well God has p... Thu, 5 Jan 2017 06:07:00 EST Then and Now In this bout of weight loss spanning from 2015-2016 I've lost 48 lbs.. There was one other time--in 2010-2011 when I had lost a significant amount also. The major difference is that back then I was hooked on exercise. I did Walk Away the Pounds with good old Leslie...I lifted weights ...I walked, even ran a little. And I felt GOOD. Asthma was well controlled and I felt strong. <BR> <BR> So what has happened since then? <BR> More asthma. More steroids. weight gain. Many surgeries due t... Thu, 29 Dec 2016 05:16:03 EST The Trail Mix from Hell So for quite a while I was going great guns in my weight loss...losing a pound a day in the days following Mom's death. I knew that that rapid weight loss and loss of appetite were only temporary; that once I had grieved, my desire to eat would return. <BR> <BR> And it did. <BR> <BR> I tried to hang on to some of the good habits of the time of that weight loss. Do not finish what is on your plate. Always leave some behind. Sometimes, (like when you were really hungry or when the food is... Thu, 22 Dec 2016 04:54:39 EST A Letter to Myself Dear Cynthia, <BR> You have been doing great at losing weight! You are now approaching the place where you don't feel ill when you catch sight of yourself in the mirror. <BR> But all that good notwithstanding, it is time you and I had a talk. <BR> In the past week you celebrated your birthday and. while you did well by not eating the majority of the sweet potato fries, you had a rich appetizer and the dessert!!! CHEESECAKE smothered in whipped cream! The only good thing I can say is that... Wed, 14 Dec 2016 09:19:54 EST A Revision So several years ago I was a rabid raw vegan. My skin looked amazing. I had ZERO body odor....I felt good. But it is very very hard to maintain that type of diet for very long. It takes tons of planning and foresight. <BR> <BR> Then I was just a vegan. <BR> And then just a vegetarian. <BR> <BR> And yesterday at my birthday dinner: I had 3oz of steak. It was the first steak I'd had in 30 years and I just had a yen for it. It will not become a habit....I can easily go another 30 years wi... Sun, 11 Dec 2016 06:07:44 EST Navel Gazing I just spent time looking through some other people's Spark Pages. I see the pics of their activities, adventures, travel and athletic events. I read their blogs. And I thought of my life....spent mostly alone; mostly sitting in my recliner with very few times going out anywhere except for MD appointments and as a result my blogs are mostly introspective...."navel gazing" you might say. It is pointless to feel envy...not only pointless but WRONG. (Ten commandments anyone?) It is a grea... Fri, 9 Dec 2016 05:52:52 EST Kicking and Screaming Why is it that I CANNOT talk myself into exercising? When I was in the rehab I busted my the point of sweating...I was motivated...loved seeing new muscles and regaining lost strength. <BR> <BR> But it was HARD. <BR> <BR> I remember seeing two elderly ladies, in their 80's, who also were not weight bearing on one leg like me. They grabbed those walkers on wheels and off they went, hopping easily on their PT walks. I said to my PT, "why is it so EASY for them??" I struggled ... Thu, 8 Dec 2016 06:38:47 EST Struggles and Truth I've been struggling lately...I'm really feeling depressed and am praying not to be swallowed whole by that monster again. I just have to dig my heels in, spend time on my knees...and RESIST. There are 6 factors behind my gloom and each of them alone is enough to make you want to just stay in bed. But I've been in bad spots before and managed to persist and succeed in spite of them; so why should this time be different? <BR> <BR> FACT: My God who is in me and around me, knows what he is d... Sun, 4 Dec 2016 05:18:36 EST Dropping the Mole So I've just rapidly lost about 20 lbs following the death of my mom. Food tasted like sawdust and I had no appetite at all. SO NOW comes the challenging part. "How to maintain and I continue the weight loss without losing ground and regaining. I've been trying to start some new eating habits and mostly that involves changing the schedule of my eating. I used to hop out of bed and make breakfast but now I have no desire to eat until around 10:00- 11:00. So I sometimes eat something then... Sun, 27 Nov 2016 08:11:32 EST LOSS: My weight and my Mom I just wrote a whole blog...including pics...and it disappeared! I really wish Spark People would save drafts so that if you lose it you can come back to it and finish it....without it being sucked into cyber space. <BR> <BR> I'm writing today to celebrate the fact that I finally reached my first goal. I have already set my next goal. <BR> I know that my weight loss is not due to healthy living but due to the complete loss of appetite that I've had since mom died on Oct 27th. It will be... Wed, 9 Nov 2016 06:22:23 EST Successes and Other Musings Yesterday I weighed myself..... ( I know....after this I will weigh myself weekly. ) I wanted to see if the inexplicable one extra pound had gone away. And yes it had! I struggled all day yesterday with wanting something sweet....a Symphony bar is my favorite. That or some ice where my head was at. I compromised by making my favorite comfort food: Pasta (whole wheat) with butter (real) and parmesan shreds (also real). I did feel guilty about the poor nutritional value of the m... Thu, 20 Oct 2016 05:36:45 EST Large Scale Deception This week I've been feeling a bit down. I weighed myself yesterday and found I'd gained a pound....inexplicably...No cheats no pigging out...I KNOW that weight fluctuates and that that is all it likely is...but still. You know how it is: you finally face the scale and it gives you bad news. It can ruin your day. (I know I'm giving the scale way too much power. Old anorexic habits die slowly) <BR> <BR> So today I was searching through my closet...we are having an Indian Summer this week a... Tue, 18 Oct 2016 08:38:15 EST Rambling Well, my last post was a "bummer" - let's see if I can do better this time. <BR> My ankle has improved enough that I can put weight on it for a minute or so while transferring from scooter to recliner or chair to scooter. It hurts some to do that but it's a dull aching pain rather than the sharp agony it was before. It does hurt enough to make me not want to try anything more than standing. <BR> <BR> Hurricane Matthew was supposed to go out to sea...however it surprised us by continuing... Thu, 13 Oct 2016 02:33:01 EST Blue Sunday I have been for months...I'm at home in my recliner recovering from a major ankle surgery. Where I would LIKE to be is at my church with my faith family worshipping and enjoying the company. And to make matters worse "DH" is less than friendly today (which is a complete understatement.) <BR> <BR> I feel like crying. But even tears are out of my reach. <BR> <BR> I know this is not a blog about food or weight loss....but I do not have any other place to vent right now. My fa... Sun, 2 Oct 2016 10:56:18 EST Response: to a blog and to my circumstances I usually start the week with a menu plan and it must have a wide range of strength and ingredients that it will require to prepare it. A friend pointed me to a popular blog post about meal and grocery planning and it prompted these thoughts. <BR> <BR> I used to cook 7 dinners a week...using left overs as lunches. Well that does not work for me or my husband anymore. WHY? Well sometimes he will have eaten a large lunch at work and doesn't want much for dinner except maybe a bowl of cere... Mon, 11 Jul 2016 10:59:48 EST Re-Writing "Normal" As I am gearing myself up for my ankle fusion surgery next week (next WEEK???!!) I am thinking that maybe I should come up with some goals or maybe some motivational statements that will keep me from losing motivation altogether. How about the old Virginia Slims ads: "You've come a long way baby!" Yes. I have and quitting smoking 21 years ago this month was a big part of my initial drive to get healthy. But now what? Now what can I focus can I maintain encouragement? Forward Dri... Sun, 26 Jun 2016 04:41:27 EST The Game Changer The air was crisp, the first rays of morning light peeked over the tree covered mountains. I pulled the laces of my sneakers tight, grabbed a bottle of water and headed for the door. I did a few stretches and then set out. As I crossed the two mile mark on my walk, I recalled the days when I could only make it down my driveway. I had one rule: Every day do a little more....and that approach built muscles and defied asthma. I did a nebulizer treatment every day before I started out and thi... Thu, 12 May 2016 06:03:22 EST What it Means to Persevere The following definitions are taken from an old Webster's Dicitionary <BR> Perseverance -1) The act or quality of persisting. 2) Continuance in a state of grace until it is succeeded by a state of glory. <BR> <BR> <BR> Persevere - To persist in any enterprise undertaken in spite of counter influences, opposition etc. <BR> <BR> Persistent- inclined to persist, tenacity, doggedness, perseverance. <BR> <BR> These definitions bring to mind a dog with a bone. Guarding it, and chewing it until... Mon, 25 Apr 2016 04:40:03 EST Why Not? I have two big "I SHOIULDS" that have been plaguing my conscience. 1) to do some drawing and 2) to get my body moving. I sit in this power recliner 95% of the day. And it is getting harder and harder to even stand up. This morning I've done 3 or 4 exercises...wall push ups, counter squats and band pull downs. I kind of considered doing them, almost dismissed the idea and then threw laziness and pain to the winds and did a few things. I want to do two more sets .... <BR> I also should th... Wed, 20 Apr 2016 08:48:13 EST Mercy toward Myself Lately I am very reluctant to weigh myself, believing that I will have gained weight. But lately, when curiosity gets the best of me and I weigh myself there have been good amounts of weight lost. But since I have been tracking my food, I am appalled by some of the high calorie foods I have been sucking down. NOW I am really REALLY scared to weigh myself....I look in the mirror and I see that "pregnant" belly and despair. But to be honest, my belly is smaller than it was. I've lost 30 lb... Sun, 17 Apr 2016 17:06:49 EST What Next? Exactly as I predicted, I fell prey to insatiable cravings and a feeling of immunity because my weight was "low" (low considering the past 5 years.) I regained almost all of the weight I had lost. I am thinking about having Spark design my menu again as I did years ago very successfully. This is what the hospital did for me. I made my order and they tweaked it to only contain a healthy amount of calories by moderating portions. <BR> <BR> I will have to look at the menus once again. The o... Fri, 1 Apr 2016 15:24:09 EST Old Tapes I have discovered something about myself. If I have lost weight-- and i weigh myself and see the weight loss this is the most dangerous time for me. ONce I get complacent and self congratulatory I usually very quickly regain the weight I had lost. <BR> <BR> Lately I have been feeling "fat" and hating my body. I postpone weighing and am so afraid of what that scale would say. HOwever I'm at the lowest weight I've been since 2011. Thus far I have lost 36 lbs. But I cannot think about ... Sun, 20 Mar 2016 15:11:09 EST The Hipster Returns so. I was sick a couple of weeks ago and it turned in to a resistant asthma attack which simply was not responding to treatment. ON March 1st I was admitted to the hospital to try to get things under control again. By my second week in the hospital, the asthma began to respond and I made plans to come home. On the day of my antiicpated discharge, I was sitting on the edge of the bed and bent over to pick up a sock. And POP!! Out came my hip from the socket which causes instant immobiil... Sat, 12 Mar 2016 14:09:44 EST