DARWHOHOO's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=DARWHOHOO DARWHOHOO's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Butt muscles http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5456970 So I decided ot os time to restart my regular workouts...with an esy 30 min turbofire workout. After all these were easy when I stopped. Man was I crazy to say that last bit <em>33</em> <BR> <BR> After 10 mins I huffing and puffing like the wolf <em>198</em> ..after 5 mins I had to pause..at 30 mins...this is TORTURE thank heavens it is done!! And the next morning, oooh I had pain everywhere. I was reminded of all the muscles I had, the one in my back, the one in my shoulders, and not ... Fri, 16 Aug 2013 09:32:46 EST Darlene can you me make a salad? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5450163 So my husband's DD came by today and it's lunchtime. Then Chrissie came upto me and said, "Darlene can you make me a salad?" <BR> <BR> Not a sandwich, not give me a donut, make her a salad ...wow! <BR> <BR> So I made a salad with lettuce, tomato apples and grapes. Gave her with a chicken leg and three spoonfuls of rice. <BR> <BR> As a result of making a salad for a kid, I had a delicious salad to my lunch. Then my DH made a cucumber and avocado mix...yum yum YUM. I probably still overate... Fri, 9 Aug 2013 17:35:31 EST 240 emails http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5434028 I got married July 20 and the planning, worrying not sleeping has made SP a last priority...giving me 240+ unread emails as I been most off for the last 2 months, or more. <BR> <BR> Now all that is over I can finally get back to my regularly scheduled life. Though while off I learnt something <BR> <BR> -food is my issue <BR> -wasting food is not bad...the starving children will not get the food if I eat it off or of I don't eat it off. <BR> -my stomach is not as big as I thought it was <B... Fri, 26 Jul 2013 09:02:45 EST It was never about losing weight wasit? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5314416 I feel rejuvenated from my SP break. I have learnt some stuff too <BR> <BR> 1. This journey was never about losing weight! <BR> <BR> My dad jogs for a hour days per week. he just drive out and drives back in sweaty and smelly. i went with him a few times when I was younger but never got into running around a field. But he does it. He has never entered a 5k marathon etc,he does it and he told me this week he eats veggies every night before he does to bed. He never stopped after he lost a b... Sun, 7 Apr 2013 09:08:22 EST My last blog was an April Fools gottcha http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5310865 Just came back to clarify as some ppl really ythougtn I was leaving lol. So sorry if I was harsh. For the week I am away I have just been tracking food and reviewing my goals...trying to make some of them more simple, especially when it come to my fruits/veggies in take. <BR> <BR> Thanks for the love all...when I get back completely I will tell each of you thanks much <BR> <BR> <em>304</em> Thu, 4 Apr 2013 00:04:57 EST I'm leaving SP http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5307057 APRIL FOOLS!!!! <BR> <BR> Leave no way!!! I am takinng a break tho to just refocus my goals and tackle my struggle with food. <BR> <BR> Have a great day and have a laugh today!! <BR> <BR> PS i will only be gone for a week Mon, 1 Apr 2013 07:04:55 EST Turning Lemons into Champagne http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5287635 My knee pain is getting better. I have not been able go run and I really miss it. Last night was the first time in over 10 weks my fh and I went walking. As I hit the road my body screamed "RUN DARLENE RUUUUUN!!!" Sigh...lemon# 1 <em>24</em> <BR> <BR> So how did I turn this lemon into champagne...I swam instead <BR> <BR> In 2003 I volunteered to swim for my team on Sport's day...to give us points. I couldn't swim the length of the pool and that was a standard pool.. I could never get th... Fri, 15 Mar 2013 11:13:53 EST Wow support from you and Mum... Thank You http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5270194 I have been sending thank you messages to those who responded to my last blog. I thought I should also say thank you to those who just read but felt my pain. I wish I could do more thank thank you.i have decided to stay on and take the break when I need to. <BR> <BR> So I was having some real problems lately and decided to run away from it all. Before I ran I spoke to mum. We have gotten closer over the last few years but I aways had thought she never understood me or what I have to deal wit... Sat, 2 Mar 2013 19:42:45 EST Thinking of leaving http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5261254 I took an impromptu brea rom all things spark this week to relieve myself of this heavy burden of hope. I was so sick of tracking and exercising and supporting others when nothing has been happening to me. See, there is so much time you can say, at least I haven't gained, or I feel smaller or it will happen. Every time I came here on SP, instead of a success story I keep feeling like a failure and this past week, I never had to feel that. So, do I quit SP (if I do I will miss you Ramona and F... Sat, 23 Feb 2013 16:27:11 EST No exercise = sad face http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5244284 This past week was <em>198</em> oh so busy! <BR> <BR> I did not do my exercises most days this week and I felt out of it...I felt sad and miserable and tired and whatever else was <em>39</em> ! <BR> <BR> Good news I lost 0.2lbs so eating really does help...yup I am an official convert <em>15</em> <BR> <BR> Today I was able to swim....I did so for two hours...I was on a high...still am...an overdose of endophines I believe <BR> <BR> Btw not enough sunblock= real bad tan in all th... Sat, 9 Feb 2013 18:21:54 EST TWHD...who would've thunk!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5230710 As you know I have been taking swim lessons. So far I have learnt the crawl and how to breathe while swimming. I also go few days to practice what I have learnt. <BR> <BR> Today I was doing my practice sessions on the beach. I swam one way, with the crawl and then the other way fluttered my feet and rotated my hands basically practicing my breathing. Then some guy said...I wish I could do the butterfly so smoothly, all I can do is the crawl. <BR> <BR> I was gracious but in my mind I was ... Wed, 30 Jan 2013 19:27:36 EST THWD...Being scared with positive results http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5211656 I lost 2.4lbs this week and I do not believe the scale. I know I should be celebrating and all but this has happened before and I do something, eat something that messes it all up. I believe this loss has to do with my food choices. <BR> <BR> Digression...5 servings of fruits/veggies is so not as hard as I thought it was. I just had lunch with a salad mixed with apple, tomato and lettuce and strips of bell peppers and that added up to 2.5 servings. I also discovered (after three months lol) ... Thu, 17 Jan 2013 14:07:58 EST The amazing jogging fat girl!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5202347 I was to post this since Tuesday and was too lazy....anyhoo <BR> <BR> Tuesday was my rest from exercise day and I got to thinking about all the fitness minutes I have racked up. <BR> <BR> I jog on average 1.5 miles everytime I go out (at least 3 times per week) and then sprints/walks for the next 0.5 mile. I am getting faster and more confident. I even stick my chest out like those sprinters on the Loympics!! Man I feel good!! And when I do that last (or second to last) sprint up the *inse... Fri, 11 Jan 2013 15:03:06 EST THWD...Maintenance before the loss http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5193872 Yup...I have decided to call my lack of loss maintenance...well unplanned maintenance. <BR> <BR> However, in thinking about it I discovered something....for the first time since 2003 (I know some of you out there can say for soooo much longer) my weight has remained constant (between -5 and +5) and not yo-yoed between -20 and +20 pounds of the starting weight . So I have maintained my current weight for 8 months.....I like this view..my personal NSV <em>244</em> <BR> <BR> Update on the f... Sun, 6 Jan 2013 21:23:02 EST THWD...I am scared this won't work http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5186567 I haven't been doing as well as I would like on this journey. I know food is my issue and I have begin making baby steps to changing my eating habits. But it feels as if whenever i take one step forward, i take two steps back the following day. <BR> <BR> I started this to 'To hell with defeat' (THWD) mindset to not give up...not surrender even though I see very little results. But right now I feel as these methods I am trying do not work and why bother waste my time on this whole journey. I... Wed, 2 Jan 2013 16:24:57 EST To h@ll with defeat...me eating an apple at midnight noooo..... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5172265 I was to write this blog since Sunday....on Saturday I was so busy getting ready for a school function I honestly forgot to being snacks with us. So halfway through the function I was famished. We ordered hot dog but it tasted really bad and me in my hungry state did not eat it all. Now this is such a success for me cause when I am hungry I eat everything regardless of the taste!! <BR> <BR> S we finally got home and by this time I was oh so hungry!! But something in my head told me to take ... Thu, 20 Dec 2012 17:45:39 EST To h@ll with defeat.. Food update..week 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5165249 So I am in the process of readjusting my snacking habits of eating healthier substitutes besides processed sugar for snacks 5 days per week <BR> <BR> I love to tick those other goal markers!! I think I have lost the weight I had gained over the past few weeks but I am not sure as I am still skeptical I have lost anything so when the scale shows 197 I will know...whenever it get there it gets there. Right now It feels <em>246</em> being in control when offered chocolate or when at a buffet... Thu, 13 Dec 2012 09:34:12 EST To h@ll with defeat....Food http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5155945 Now my exercise of 5 days cardio and 3 days strength has become a habit...time for kore improvement. Btw...running is awesome even for a 20 seconds run as fast as you can!!!! <BR> <BR> So I have decided to take small steps on adjusting my diet. My first step snacking <BR> <BR> The typical snacks include the fruit with the ( more than) occasional cream filled biscuits, chocolate etc. <BR> <BR> I have started a new goal to go 5 days without those snacks and when that is becomes a habit I wi... Tue, 4 Dec 2012 12:22:13 EST I jogged this week http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5106531 I ran three days this week and it felt great!! Why did it take so long for me to start this damn exercise... <em>40</em> <BR> <BR> Mind I will conquer your resistance to change and hard work <em>104</em> <BR> <BR> So my new goal for Oct is to run 3 days per week <BR> <BR> I don't expect to lose any weight. I am trying to cross that off my agenda. I am focussing on two things <BR> 1. Loving my body...which is going well <em>204</em> <BR> 2. Getting more flexible...hell yeah <em... Sat, 20 Oct 2012 23:00:43 EST Birthday Exercise! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5078518 Today after a week-long hiatus I started back my normal exercise routine. Today I did Zumba. Five minutes into the zumba I was so overwhelmed with this good feeling that I was almost in tears. I can't believe I never started back yesterday lol. <BR> Afterwards I did ST and then some stretching which is <em>345</em> <em>345</em> <em>345</em> <BR> <BR> My body told me today....on my Birthday....exercise is the best gift you have given to me today. I love you so much and appreciate w... Fri, 28 Sep 2012 14:22:52 EST What a blog to write after losing a size... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5076807 So I am back home and have gained all of the 5lbs that it took 5 months for me to lose. I was really feeling like crap. I still do. But I have decided to shake it off and write down a few factors that lead to the gain. <BR> <BR> This didn't take one week to happen as much as I would like to believe. So I will detail the reasons I have been gaining from when I moved. <BR> <BR> 1. August 6 I moved from Jamaica to Barbados to live with my finance ( new foods to get adjusted to), started going ... Thu, 27 Sep 2012 08:59:59 EST Down a Size http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5072602 So I am in Canada for a few days and decided to purchase some pants for home. I went in the Walmart, picked up my usual 1X/2X and headed to the change room. <BR> <BR> They were ALL too big and I mean too much space too big!! So I had to walk back to choose smaller sizes...the best walk of my life!!! I took up some smaller sizes and even snuck in a medium...WHAAAAAAAT A MEDIUM?? And they all fit!!..yup the medium too!! <BR> <BR> I have lost only 5lbs since I joined SP in April and I even fel... Mon, 24 Sep 2012 09:23:41 EST Sept 20-22, 2012 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5070733 <BR> Sept 20- stressing over having my passport delivered ontime for my flight at 3pm...got it at 1:35pm rushed to the airport <BR> Sept 21- viewing for persons who couldn't make it to the funeral to pay their respects...left home 10am reached home 10pm <BR> Sept 22- the funeral (beautiful service) left home 8:30 reached home 5 <BR> <BR> And I ate and ate and ate!! What did I eat?...think of a pastry...yup I ate that and also that one you forgot to mention <BR> <BR> But now I'm ok, time... Sat, 22 Sep 2012 19:34:51 EST What is wrong today?? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5064919 Nothing is wrong!! Just wanted your attention to tell you this! <BR> <BR> I wish you the best journey and soo much success...remember you ARE a success story!! <BR> <BR> <em>306</em> <em>381</em> <BR> <BR> Love, Dar Tue, 18 Sep 2012 12:51:38 EST The Past does not Determine the Future http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5043782 I had my first graveyard class last last and it was so lively and informative. I found out that I have graveyard classes every night and on Saturday classes are 9 am-3 pm. So much for that...oh Well <BR> <BR> Since today was our first class we introduced ourselves. The course's Title is Energy Sources and Clean Energy Systems. When persons introduced themselves, so many of them did not have a background in Physics...like I expected them to> That did not phase them, they, we all participated,... Tue, 4 Sep 2012 10:32:45 EST Cadio Moments...and something else http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5040040 I know one (more) good thing has come out of me starting this journey....cardio moments. <BR> <BR> I was never one to clean much until recently...all my cleaning chores are cardio moments first, chores second. So if I never lose the weight....i know I will be healthy enough for these cardio moments. <BR> <BR> Congrats to all who have lost!! <em>185</em> <BR> <BR> I was reading my last blog and realize I want to be Skinny cause the media ppl got into my mind and start switching things arou... Sat, 1 Sep 2012 13:29:07 EST Losing Steam http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5036351 It's coming close to September...which is the time where I forget everything except work...everything else...eating right, exercise is secondary to work. Now it's different I won't have work. I will have school and I think I will be busy but not as busy as I used to be. <BR> <BR> But I find that I am beginning to lose interest in it all...maybe I need a break from it all I don't know...maybe I am overwhelmed by the move and resettle...I am becoming annoyed with the fact that I can't reall... Wed, 29 Aug 2012 16:56:26 EST Feeling :-D http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5033428 I am felling better today. I am so happy for you SP friends!! You are so supportive and the positivity you ooze is OH so wonderful!! I love you guys!! <BR> <BR> <em>223</em> <em>252</em> <em>220</em> <BR> Mon, 27 Aug 2012 15:47:27 EST Feeling :-( http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5030244 I'm feeling out of sorts today..like I should have slept more. The truth is I miss my me time. I miss having lots of it and I feel so selfish for even thinking it. <BR> <BR> How do you ge some in without ofending/hurting... <BR> <BR> Sigh <BR> <BR> Going for a walk (not alone...sigh) Sat, 25 Aug 2012 08:47:45 EST The Move...An Update http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5025400 It has been two weeks and one day since I moved and it has been an interesting two weeks. Meanwhile exercise is awesome....my eating patterns are suffering. I find there are more temptations that I can't just resit by putting them out of my sight, I have to chose to not indulge. <BR> <BR> Before the move I had soda maybe once a month...and I would definitely not have more than one serving....now I am drinking two servings of soda...huh? Not to mention the cakes and chocolate... <BR> <BR> ... Tue, 21 Aug 2012 20:25:15 EST I'm missing home http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5012505 Moving out is tough...moving to another country to touger but moving out into another country in with someone is <em>33</em> <BR> <BR> I am now missing home and the routine I once had there. I don't have as much "me" time as I usually do and it's getting me really cranky. <BR> <BR> We cooked today, baked chicken, after seasoning them etc last night and I should feel great! (I never cooked at home). But I don't I feel great. I feel like curling up in a ball and crying. But I don't want to... Sun, 12 Aug 2012 19:13:35 EST Why I want to lose weight...a 3 month update http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4994648 I started SP 3 months and 1 day ago. <BR> <BR> On my 3 month anniversary, yesterday I found out that I have lost a total of 3 lbs...yup have reached at plateau after 5lbs and going up and down 2 lbs for a few weeks now. I was frustrated...felt like I will never be a success story....I cried like spoilt brat cried. Cause I have been working out hard, tracking my calories and I deserved to see more!! I stopped everything..no exercise...rarely sparked...though I never reverted back to eating cr... Tue, 31 Jul 2012 11:41:40 EST I am crying http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4992869 My exercise plan is as follows <BR> 5 days cardio (30 mins) 3 days strength <BR> <BR> My nutrition is ok I believe. I make my numbers...stay within my calorie limit for on average 5 days out of 7 days...and the other two days...one will be above the <BR> <BR> My protein intake is on the low side so I have started to include more beans...something new to increase that and reduce my fat intake <BR> <BR> What i don't get it why i am fluctuating between 197 (was there the week before) and 195... Mon, 30 Jul 2012 10:16:03 EST A Binge, a Discovery..and Homework http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4986028 So yesterday I ate well well...was so proud of myself...fruits, good breakfast, good lunch. <em>43</em> . Then after eating dinner I was fine...then it hit maybe 5 mins later....the need for junk food...and I just so happened to have some...and I ate and I ate. <em>15</em> <BR> <BR> Now this junk food was my weekly (maybe even bi-weekly stash so sure as hell not buying anymore too bad junk food Saturdays). Oh and I haven't binge like that since...since...I dunno since when...and the stash... Wed, 25 Jul 2012 09:37:57 EST Other People's Successes and Mine http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4980545 I have been on SP for three months now and have only lost 4lbs. My highest was 7lbs and then I gained back 3lbs somewhere between before a two week vacay (which ended last week) and now. Then I look at these wonderful ppl and how they lose 12lbs in 12 weeks then I look at those who have lost 100lbs in 52 weeks. That is one lb a week...way more than mine. These goals are amazing and <em>242</em> if you have achieved!! <BR> <BR> I on the other hand have lost one pound a week but a little ove... Sat, 21 Jul 2012 13:37:48 EST Sigh http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4979473 This morning I felt great!. Did my workout...even pushed a little...Got dressed felt awesome. Then when I got on the road I felt crappy. Like I am too fat to feel pretty or sexy . <BR> <BR> I have been thinking that it's been 3 months I am yo-yoing yet I am inclined to believe that I am doing what i should do. Maybe I should push harder..not eating particular types of food, etc. I just wanna be out of the 190s....Guess my body is different...that of I am not trying hard enough <BR> <BR> <... Fri, 20 Jul 2012 16:07:04 EST Alone at the airport....A Journal Entry http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4972276 So I was sitting alone at the airport waiting to board a flight for two hours and these are the words that came out of my head. <BR> <BR> <BR> A journal entry <BR> <BR> I'm at the airport and am alone. Time to think of this trip. I have so many things in my head yet they're taking time to come out...my head is pregnant and in labour lol. <BR> <BR> So many Jamaicans (why didn't I write my own people here) are around me and yet I feel I have nothing in common to speak to them about. <BR> <... Mon, 16 Jul 2012 06:23:40 EST I've begun to overeat...time to take it under control http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4957470 I habe been in Trinidad for 6 days now and I find that I am beginning to regress. <BR> <BR> Yesterday I went way overvmy calorie range. The food choices at the hotel for breakfast were not much so I ate very little. Then I eat a huge lunch then a huge dinner after 7pm. As i claim I hate the gum I never worked out and thus my regression. And did youbknow I was mindful of what I ate....can you imaginge when I wasn't mindful hahahaha <BR> <BR> Today will be a better day....I will chose cereal ... Fri, 6 Jul 2012 05:26:55 EST June Personal Challenge http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4949561 I did this for one of my team's challenges and I thought I'd make it into a blog <BR> <BR> One thing I notices was that towards the end I was losing motivation, but I used weird opportunities to get it done. I am proud of myself!!! <BR> <BR> <BR> My goal is to stick with 30 mins of cardio 5 days per week. so that works out to hmmm...(reaches for the calculator).....ah 600 cardio mins this month <BR> <BR> 1. 30 min June 1, 2012 <BR> <BR> 2. 60 min bootcamp June 2, 2012 <BR> <BR> 3. 120... Sat, 30 Jun 2012 22:39:16 EST Lesson Re-learnt http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4940895 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/5/l552783594.jpg"> <BR> <BR> While doing bootcamp at the gym yesterday (Saturday June 23, 2012) a lady shows off her absolutely fabulously ripped abs. Then she told us that when she was younger she used to hide them under big shirts because she was ashamed that her tummy wasn't smooth and flat like all the others. I am 100% sure that now the roles have been reversed and trust me guys her abs are envious and I am sure some guys would envy her a... Sun, 24 Jun 2012 23:51:33 EST What does that mean?? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4935346 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/8/l585496229.jpg"> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/3/9/l39135850.jpg"> <BR> <BR> So yesterday I saw SAHM and had to google it. Now I know it means Stay at Home Mom. And then it hit me...there are so many acronyms out there and I am not keeping up. I am 29 years old and I feel way old (no offense to anyone). From the DH, FH, MIL, SIL (is that one son or sister?), HRM, TDEE, BMR, SYTYCD.... <em>28</em> . <BR> <BR> I remember when ... Wed, 20 Jun 2012 21:17:06 EST Thinking about thinking about the future http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4927070 I have been afraid of visualizing my goals for fear of living in the future. <BR> <BR> I used to live in the future as everything was possible, including being loved, being beautiful and especially being happy. These vacations were extended and so as my body was still in the present, I would just mechanically function, doing nothing to in the present to secure the future I'd dream about. <BR> <BR> And so when the future became the present, I would be disappointed, etc etc etc because the... Thu, 14 Jun 2012 23:35:36 EST The end of my slump...THANKS TO YOU!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4925557 I have been in a slump the last couple of days because of my weight gain and as I posted on KOLORATURSOPRAN's blog "rejoice" that I know the reasons could be other than I am a lazy slob but I still stayed in the slump. <BR> <BR> I made myself stay in the slump and the week got worse, emotionally. I was less positive, saw nothing in the mirror I liked and was even cranky. <BR> <BR> Today was the climax of it all. I found out I was 10 lbs heavier than my mum who I have always suspected was l... Wed, 13 Jun 2012 22:54:16 EST I did everything right and I gained!!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4921176 I gained 2 lbs since my last weigh in last week. I don't know why <BR> <BR> I tracked my calories, never went over last week, worked out 30 min cardio 5 days and strength training 3 days....and yet I gained <em>39</em> <BR> <BR> I weigh the same time as I did last week so I can't blame that. I know the scale is not the only factor to consider. But i never thought i would gain!!!! <BR> <BR> I don't feel to work out right now. I feel to lie in bed and sleep...but I will do something... <BR... Mon, 11 Jun 2012 08:02:53 EST I don't like the BMI http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4920589 The BMI calculator says I am now obese...I can understand that. When at my first goal weight of 160 lbs...I will still borders on obesity....ooooohk. This thing says in order to have a healthy BMI I need to be between 97 and 132lbs....what??!! <BR> <BR> I am 5 1'...yes short but to be at 97 lbs is almost anorexic in my eyes <BR> <BR> Now I feel bad because my ultimate goal of 140 lb (which would be the most awesomest victory ever) has me as being overweight and the exceptions are for pregna... Sun, 10 Jun 2012 19:52:15 EST My Jiggles http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4916890 So i was working out today in a sports bra and bottom and I looked in the mirror and saw my love handles jiggling. While working out I'm there looking at them until I realize the jiggles mean I'm working out and hence they're working out lol. <BR> <BR> I love my jiggles!! Thu, 7 Jun 2012 21:34:51 EST Control ha ha http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4912173 I have been on this journey for a month now and I LOVE not feeling hungry or over full. <BR> I love the feeling of being satisfied!! <em>41</em> <BR> <BR> I love the feeling of having control over whether or not I want cheesecake at that moment!!! <em>41</em> <BR> <BR> I love that i can go into a store and not pick up a bag of Reeces cause I claim I need food!! <em>41</em> <BR> <BR> I went to a buffet and ate small portions of food and not went over my calories...I ...dare i say..con... Mon, 4 Jun 2012 20:50:32 EST Should I push myself to the limit when working out http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4910012 Yesterday I went to a gym for a bootcamp session. I used to go there on Saturdays and decided to go again. they started using 5lb weights so I told them I wanted 3lb weights. One of the ladies says I should push myself to use them. I have been thinking about that statement since then. <BR> <BR> What if I push myself as hard as I can go and the give up because every time I exercise the only thing in my mind is I'm going to work HARD? <BR> <BR> What if I push myself and I am over my limit ha... Sun, 3 Jun 2012 13:18:17 EST Thoughts http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4908120 Enjoy the minute you have like you never want it to end!! <BR> <BR> Stay positive like your life depends on it (cause it does) <BR> <BR> Stop hating yourself now...or when you were heavier or whenever...love your body regardless of which photo you look at!! <BR> <BR> <em>89</em> + <em>247</em> <BR> <BR> Dar Fri, 1 Jun 2012 22:29:31 EST Exercising for endorphins http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4906428 I really had no energy this morning to do anything. i can home from work feeling a bit better but still lousy. I ate first then an hour later decided to get this exercise thing (that I usually do before i work) over with <BR> <BR> Now 30 mins of cardio, 10 mins of resistance band strength training and 5 mins of strtches later....add a maybe 5 mins for it to kick in and BOOM!!!! I am feeling <em>250</em> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <em>321</em> Thu, 31 May 2012 20:37:05 EST