CYNTHIUSS's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=CYNTHIUSS CYNTHIUSS's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ HELP! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5652576 My kid has ataxic CP, she's 10 and still can't ride a bike with training wheels without white knuckling it the entire time! I entered her into a contest for an adaptive bike, she needs votes to get it. Just push the vote button, no need to enter any info. We only have 5 days to get 50 qualifying votes! Please help...she has such a tough time, this will really help her life!! <BR> <BR> <link>https://www.friendshipcircle.org/bik<BR>es/2014/03/lexi-3/ </link> <BR> <BR> Update: <BR> I'm not ... Thu, 20 Mar 2014 16:57:10 EST one block at a time, getting in the groove http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5616862 I'm here, I'm spinning the wheel, I'm logging my food and fitness minutes...I'm checking off my goals! Last night I was looking at my goals and saw I still hadn't completed some....there was the push! I took the time to complete them just so I could check them off! It's working, the incentives of spinning, growing points, seeing the goal checklist completed, the goodies, the comments on my blog....they have me engaged! <BR> <BR> <BR> I'm looking at making it through my day, one block at a... Thu, 6 Feb 2014 11:48:22 EST again...I'm back...again sabatoging/indulging self....again... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5615469 Been here, done this, it's been very good for me. Good people, good ideas, good inspiration, good things to learn about, good incentives, just plain good for me! Then life happened in fast mode...got very ill the end of 2012 with diverticulitis....then surgery - bowel resection in early 2013....that took a long time to heal from....then my 10 year old child became seriously, seriously ill with lung disease and a serious heart condition...many hospitalizations, two heart surgeries....in betwe... Tue, 4 Feb 2014 23:26:25 EST scared skinny http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5035378 Or really, scared healthy. Scared skinny somehow sounded better for a title... I talked to a surgeon today, he's expecting I'll need a bowel resection due to recurrent diverticulitis...The fat on my abdomen is my biggest health risk. More for the surgeons to cut through, more stress on every body system, contributed to the diverticulitis to start with. Fat is my biggest health risk all the way around, literally. I'm wearing an intertube of fat, fat crowds my organs, infiltrates my liver, clo... Tue, 28 Aug 2012 22:35:34 EST Inspiration from others led me back http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4705504 I got an e-mail from Spark, a sharing of how weight buried the real person, insulated her from living. I knew that was true for me as well. I read peoples comments. Some of the comments touched my soul. One was a quote about being in the journey versus being a critic of the journeying person. I'm not savy enough to get that quote here right now, it was a Roosevelt quote from 1910, from another member. I friended him. His sharing of the inspirational quote resonated in a part of my lif... Thu, 26 Jan 2012 15:34:47 EST CPAP due to fat and deadly risk http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4532305 I had a sleep study, I quit breathing 81 times an hour and my oxygen level went down to 73%! That's serious health risk stuff. I now have a CPAP. It's been a struggle to adjust. Parts of my functioning are better (brain and energy), but something has shifted in my personal comfort. The fat is killing me. If I hadn't had the sleep study, my memory would have continued to deteriorate, my inflammation would have continued to soar and my chance of a heart attack was phenomenal. The CPAP makes ... Wed, 12 Oct 2011 14:50:04 EST 10 minutes to change my life http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4526757 10 minutes. <BR> <BR> I could watch tv, stuff junk into my mouth, play a video game, be on the computer... <BR> <BR> or I COULD CHANGE MY LIFE! <BR> <BR> I could stretch, walk around the block, listen to a fun song and wiggle and jiggle! <BR> <BR> 10 minutes a day x 7= 70 minutes a week <BR> I could add a minute a day or every few days or even every week and I'll multiply how much stronger I'll grow, how much healthier I'll be, HOW HAPPIER I WILL FEEL (endorphins), and HOW MUCH MORE ENE... Sun, 9 Oct 2011 12:25:05 EST wii fit is a good motivator http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4519980 wii fit lets me keep track of weight and keeps a long term record. It lets me set goals. It reminds me I am obese, not just overweight. That's a medical term with insurance implications. I discovered insurance companies won't insure obese folks, unless you get the insurance through work. That was a wake up call. According to Dr. Oz, being obese is a more dangerous health risk than smoking! Wii fit makes moving fun. I can get moving and time flies by, I'm surprised at how fast I get my f... Tue, 4 Oct 2011 23:59:08 EST Reclaiming by body, stolen by inactivity http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4518214 My body was stolen by inactivity....got slower and sorer and less stable and less motivated and fatter and less healthy until I was becoming a couch potatoe consumed by facebook, video games and surfing the web. I gave up after a few more falls, a few more injuries...Then I started moving, another broken ankle made my steps small at first, but now I'm moving fast! I still need to get some distance accomplished, but I can do 4 blocks! I didn't think I'd ever walk that far again. Now I'm bac... Tue, 4 Oct 2011 01:30:03 EST Happy solstice http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4314616 I'm working on paying attention, moving more, drinking water....baby steps. did sun salutation at 5 am to greet the sun on the special day, I was way stiffer than I'd like....more stretching needed... Wed, 22 Jun 2011 01:20:50 EST Lying to myself about my coffee calories http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4304090 I've been guessing on my coffee intake. I use honey. I was guessing a packet in my big cup....I didn't want to really know how much I used. I fudged by guessing. 1 packet is 43 calories. When I really measured, I had to face that I'd been using 3 Tablespoons of honey every day - 192 calories! My big cup I'd guessed was 16 oz. It was really 28 oz. Now I've faced another portion size issue. That's 150 extra calories I wasn't counting when I logged (and tried to keep in my range) every da... Fri, 17 Jun 2011 01:28:06 EST another fall, trying to get back up http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4279740 a few weeks back i fell again, broken wrist and ankles are making things challenging, but i'm getting around, even without braces part of the time. it floored me 2 get injured again, even b4 i healed from last broken ankle. i gave up. too much pain and hopelessness to think of being fit. i've stayed at a steady 201, but i'm not getting my water, my stretches or produce. broke my patterns as well as my will. i've kept spinning. now that i'm getting around a bit better, i want to add back s... Mon, 6 Jun 2011 02:16:10 EST I sure had to eat a lot to stay THIS fat! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4210531 Today I ate a meal I used to eat when I felt ill or emotional. It's ramen noodles+cheese+tuna+peas. I haven't eaten this for a very long time. Today I felt ill,and ate it (I know it doesn't make sense...). This time I measured. I was stunned. It was 1367 calories! I sure had to eat a lot of food to stay this fat! I can't believe how much I used to eat, and how badly I ate. I ate too much fast food, fried food, sweet and salty foods,processed foods and not nearly enought fruits and v... Wed, 4 May 2011 18:32:37 EST After a few years I entered stage 2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4199677 It took me awhile to read everything about the stages and figure out what it meant to be in stage 1. After finding everything about the stages I realized I've been in stage 1 a bit long....but actually I think I needed to be in stage 1 until I truely managed to make the 3 goals a habit: listen to a get up and go song, stretch for 10 minutes and eat some form of produce. I' ve been on a streak doing all 3 for a few weeks now. I don't want to quit them as goals, they are good for me. Wantin... Sat, 30 Apr 2011 00:15:43 EST The sky is falling http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4196376 It's terrifying when the sky churns up a storm that rips your world apart. You grieve.... and you count your blessings. So much churning, so many lives ripped apart. Not just here, but all over the planet. We see it on our homefront today. It's been flashing across the homefronts of those all over the world, we usually shake our heads and think how unfortunate. Storms and temperatures have been breaking records consistantly for years all over the planet. In Jan of 2009, scientists at Pur... Thu, 28 Apr 2011 11:44:25 EST Potato chips, 5 oz.= 780 cal., and it wasn't even fun http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4193061 I was in a funk, too tired, a little rebellious about easter candy sitting around, so I had some chips. I was trying to fill some void,' lookin for satisfaction in all the wrong places'. It wasn't working, so I ate more. As I ate, feeling the rebellious streak being self satisfied, I realized, I wasn't even enjoying them. Greasy, salty and really unsatisfying, I thought, as I continued to munch. I began to realize I'd rather be munching on a carrot! Crunchy and tasty! My stubborn strea... Tue, 26 Apr 2011 23:13:33 EST Sitting is worse than might think, it may kill you, even if you exercise. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4189946 Today on NPR a story was ran with with the title: <BR> <BR> 'Sitting is worse than you might think' <BR> <BR> I've included the link below. New research indicates that even if you exercise, sitting around (watching tv, being on the computer, being at work, driving,even eating) makes you substantially more likely to die! The big muscles need to move (the ones in your hands do not count), every hour! Our bodies aren't designed to sit around, it shuts down.At least a few minutes of moving a... Mon, 25 Apr 2011 16:59:55 EST poetic me time http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4178270 Today I joined a poetry group. It felt good to do something just for me. I enjoy hearing and writing poetry. It feeds my soul to create and to be caressed by beauty. I had no idea I was walking into a group that's been together for 9 years. It was a very special experience to be welcomed into this new circle of amazing bright, creative women. As each woman shared their creations, my mind journeyed into their hearts and into their unique ways of seeing the world. It expanded my vision to p... Wed, 20 Apr 2011 00:39:04 EST I've lost my taste for fatty foods http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4169133 I've been drinking my water and logging and spinning, and stretching and exercising and sparking, and eating my fresh produce and listening to my get up and go music and I'm feeling so much better! I was low on calories and tried a piece of cheesecake - really good cheesecake. It felt greasy in my mouth, I didn't want it, it just felt nasty! I'm craving carrots, apples, water, brown rice, I'm smiling as I listen to my get up and go song and can't help but move! I didn't expect to lose my ... Sat, 16 Apr 2011 01:39:08 EST It's hard to drink all that water http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4161357 8 cups is a lot. If I don't start early and keep at it, I get to the evening and try to squeeze it all in....of course, that's a bad idea because than I have interrupted sleep. I feel so different if I drink 8 cups throughout the day. I think better, I eat less and I feel more alive when I stay hydrated all day. With my mobility challenge, I'm not working up a good sweat, but when I did - water was critical. It's extremely important to my quality of experience even if I don't work up a s... Tue, 12 Apr 2011 18:20:23 EST So hard not to eat too much with good foods http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4150812 I made a thai chicken dinner, healthy, tastes good, too good. I made a daikon and carrot salad. I loaded up on the salad, but I still ate too much. This is my greatest struggle, stopping. Even if it's healthy, can't eat too much. I feel too full and it robs me of my motivation to move. I do better eating reasonable portions with boring healthy food. My family enjoys a variety of flavors. I would be fine eating the same foods, basic-healthy-boring foods. I'm much less likely to overea... Fri, 8 Apr 2011 00:48:50 EST Dancing in a chair http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4143105 Today I discovered I can dance in a chair. I closed my eyes and felt the music and let my body move to the joy of the sound, as the minutes ticked on I really got into it, I began to heat up and peel off layers! I love danceing, double foot injuries have stopped that activity. I have a smile on my face having discovered a way to really dance! I'm in an office chair, on wheels on a a hard floor, you can really get some good twisting in! I'm tickled. When I had a swimming pool to myself... Tue, 5 Apr 2011 00:32:31 EST Inactivity is stealing my life choices http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4072957 I want my life back, or at least a new chapter that includes more choices. I haven't been on in a long time. Injuries, sickness and complicated life have sapped my motivation to try. It's costing me life choices. Instead of battling loss of mobility tooth and nail, I've become complacent. I'd rather loose myself in a scrabble game on facebook than figure out how to exercise and regain all the mobility I can. I gave up trying. I didn't move into full self pity, but I gave in to hopeless... Mon, 7 Mar 2011 11:37:22 EST Treading water http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3792270 I was drowning....bobbing up and down, catching my breath in between holding my breath. Lots of stress was drowning me. At least now I'm remembering to breath. Through the stress I've been fairly reasonable in my eating. I did some emotional eating, but fairly minor amounts, nothing like the old days before Sparkpeople. This has been some of the toughest stress of my life. It's been a long few years. I keep thinking things will slow down and life will give me some breathing room to coa... Thu, 18 Nov 2010 14:07:38 EST Now I choose, a walk or a video game... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3491369 Every day, every hour, every minute are these intersections that determine our future. I wander through my day making my very long list and trying to multitask my way through it. The intersections for me are usually get to the paper and write down the thing I remembered I have to do before I forget it and stay on task crossing items off my list. I don't put myself on my list. It's always making the calls, kids needs, household maintenance stuff, scheduling, errands, etc. I'm the stay at ... Sun, 1 Aug 2010 12:50:52 EST There are always excuses http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3490201 I've been gone since May. Injuries and family crisis. Can't write for long, due to wrist injury. I could write volumes on why I'm gaining, emotionally eating, not moving. Life could be perfect and I could still find excuses. I can't wait for ...I've been waiting for too long and gaining as I wait. I've waited to get through the pain, physical therapy, family crisis,etc. I have to just do something. I'm doing, not waiting, something - just typing is a challenging workout. That's my beginni... Sun, 1 Aug 2010 01:07:20 EST physical therapy giving me tools http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3227857 I've been frustrated and losing hope as I've struggled with pain and limited mobility. Today I got some exercises I can do (cardio is out), limited, but at least it makes me feel like I can make progress and feel some control in the situation. Of course a visit to the physical therapist meant pain....I have a new med I can try tonight. The surgeon said don't take off my wrist brace at all (even at night), or I have to be in a cast for 6 weeks! Imagine changing diapers in a cast! So 6 more... Thu, 13 May 2010 23:39:22 EST Being Healthy takes a lot of time, but so does being fat http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3193891 I haven't blogged for quite a while. Partly because I didn't want to face my stall in weight loss. Or my backslide. I haven't even checked the scale, so I don't know how far I slid. Too hard to get that honest. Maybe tomorrow. But I'm working on behaviors. I started by spinning the wheel. That doesn't take too much time. Then I added some status updates. That's quick. Having so many folks comment on my activity feed, motivated me to continue spinning the wheel and updating my status.... Tue, 4 May 2010 13:49:35 EST Gotta stop poppin' maltballs & get back to moving toward healthier life http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=3042004 I'm sluggish, I'm popping maltballs like medication to manage stress. I'm searching the fridge for whatever will satisfy my current craving - salty, sweet, carbs...I think of exercising - on occassion, but that's as far as it goes. It's not even on my list these days. I had it on my lists for many weeks, and it was always a very low priority. My lists are so long. It's 8 AM and I already have over 20 items on todays list. And there are some big items on that list. We've just managed our... Thu, 25 Mar 2010 11:35:39 EST Creativity seems to be my key http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2888979 Stress continues in unimaginable doses, with new flavors at every turn. I've discovered if I sculpt, or write for even a tad bit, I ground. I think straighter. I make better choices with my food. I desire to exercise, like creativity opens my window and makes me want to go outside and breathe in those flowers instead of just view them from the windowsill. Clay is keeping me sane. One day at a time with all the challenges, but creativity takes me into a world of timelessness, even if I h... Tue, 16 Feb 2010 13:33:38 EST Under Stress, under seige, underperforming http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2782227 Stress is so powerful. A few blogs back I talked about excuses, there are always some, somewhere. I wanted to be strong under seige, stress coming at me from every quarter. I held up for awhile, then I faultered and stood back up, unsteady. Then I crumpled, I cried and I ate. I didn't totally numb with crazy amounts of carbs, but I used food as a drug. Once I crumpled, I threw in the towel. I quit bothering to exercise, or log food, or take care of myself. I did the best I could with th... Fri, 22 Jan 2010 14:04:09 EST Baby almost died, self care and caregiving http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2740637 Sun. the baby almost died, he couldn't breathe, really, really bad asthma. I'd given him multiple albuterol treatments, plus pulmacort, prednisone and augmentin. He was retracting severely - he was working real hard to breath. I rushed him to the hospital, they said I should have called an ambulance. He almost died. A team spent 4 hours trying to stablize him. For 24 hours they pumped in hourly (and sometimes constant) albuterol, prednisone, atrovent, pulmacort, prednisone and stronger a... Wed, 13 Jan 2010 15:31:22 EST Restaurant eating and choosing http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2716741 I forgot to eat. At 2:30 I went out to eat, it was my only choice, circumstantially. I thought of ordering what I usually would in this particular restaurant, but this time I changed it. I made it healthier. Fruit instead of potatoes. I thought I'd be dissappointed, feel deprived, but I was pleasantly surprised. I loved the fruit. I closed my eyes and imagined how I would have felt if it were the hashbrowns I normally would have ordered - no difference in satisfaction, in fact this fre... Fri, 8 Jan 2010 20:32:36 EST Choosing Life http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2709200 When I get overwhelmed, I become a victim of life, I react to the stress by trying to cope, often in dysfunctional and temporary solutions - munching, video gaming, tv. When I get ahead of the curve, I choose how to manage being overwhelmed - walks, deep breathing, music and dance. That's when I feel like I'm conciously choosing life. I want to be present through the process and manage the challenges the healthiest way possible. I want to learn from my experience - get the gift from it - ... Thu, 7 Jan 2010 11:38:03 EST Do I choose LIFE or a slow miserable decline to death via a poor quality of living http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2702776 Drastic, I know, but that's really the question. We all know the facts: Obesity kills. I could qoute #s and ways obesity can kill you, take your pick: cancer, stroke, diabetes.... The research is overwhelming. The more overweight, the faster the track to death. We know the more the weight the more miserable we are in our bodies. When I'm carrying extra pounds a hike up a steep hill doesn't sound like a fun challenge but rather a risky affair that may not end well (panting - chest pains, ... Wed, 6 Jan 2010 09:20:23 EST I've been Naughty, now I must be Nice!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2698188 Okay, on my last post I admitted I'd been lazy. I tried to change my ways....but there were so many challenges...so many excuses...I think the biggest hurdle was coping with severe sleep deprivation with the newborn. He's slept through the night 2 nights now, I'm hopeful. I'm beginning to feel human again. Sleep deprivation is really tough at 51. It's been 10 weeks. That's a huge sleep debt. I gained back 10 pounds! I hit 200! I never thought I'd see that number again. I've been lift... Tue, 5 Jan 2010 13:01:28 EST Facing the facts-I'm being lazy http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2574273 I quit paying attention again. I ate what I wanted, when I wanted, as much as I wanted. I didn't bother to make time to exercise, but I had time to play video games. I got lazy. Sure I was tired, sleep deprived, I could come up with a hundred excuses, but the fact is, I got lazy. There's always something that I can use for an excuse. I'm in charge of what I put in my mouth, I'm in charge of where I place my foot for my next step. Sure I could blame: demands of family, demands of job, ... Thu, 19 Nov 2009 12:07:59 EST It's a boy http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2517393 I've been floundering, noncommital , wandering between lifestyles-scripts(sculptor, day trader, photography, writing, parent, partner, home remodeller, homemaker, inventor), doing a little of everything, but nothing enough to feel I've done it as well as I'd like - the standard ADD dilema. I've missed foster parenting. I've missed parenting a tribe of children. Foster parenting keeps me busy - real busy, doing worthwhile work that is clearly a little of everything - ( meets my ADD style)... Thu, 29 Oct 2009 10:35:45 EST losing weight - accidently http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2435066 I'm losing weight, slow, but steady. I was trying: more exercise, logging everything, then I got too busy. A strange thing happened, I kept losing! I expected for the numbers to come up. I even had some occasional unhealthy food choices, I really expected to see a consequence, instead I kept creeping down! I worried for a few moments and then I thought about what's different. My lifestyle has basically changed. My new baseline of portion size, fresh produce and generally more movemen... Mon, 28 Sep 2009 11:13:44 EST Another Monday another start http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2398445 Mondays feel like a fresh start. I'm quite ADD so any pattern for me is certainly a challenge. Once I have one, though, I'm good to go, unless I miss a day. Somewhere I read research had determined that 21 days established a habit. I've established habits, some good and some not so good. I'm getting back into the habit of spinning the wheel, that gets me on spark. I'm back into the habit of drinking 8 cups of water. I can't seem to establish the walking habit, but that's because my ankle... Mon, 14 Sep 2009 11:53:03 EST Struggling to stay focused http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2384419 It seems this journey has been 5 steps forward and 3 steps back. I'm still ahead, heading in the right direction, but it's very slow. I get on a roll, get into a pattern, then life throws me a curve and I'm out of the loop. I stop my walks, stop blogging, stop my food journal, stop the weights. There have been real curves, and I start to get back on track, but then another bump throws me off and I'm just trying to survive my day. Blogging and doing my food/exercise logging takes time. W... Tue, 8 Sep 2009 23:46:47 EST Hiking in the Redwoods http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2312609 One year ago I could barely walk. 6 months ago I was still very unstable, uneven ground was scarey. I hiked for miles in the Redwoods! I walked on rocky beaches. I climbed steep inclines. I was sore and I recovered within 24 hours - with no pain meds!!! This is very exciting for me. I had to be very careful and very conscious of every step to minimize the risk of injury, but I did it. I have a whole new world of possibilities opening up for me. I didn't think I could ever get here. ... Thu, 13 Aug 2009 12:43:41 EST Gotta Move http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2286188 I got out of my pattern of moving, groovin, pumpin the iron and loggin the intake. I'm lurching along. Trying to get back on track. So many blips and bumps on this journey. This blog is just another part of trying to get back in the groove. The food tracker is such a great tool. It's about habits. When I get in the habit of recording, as I eat, I think about what I'll be recording and what those values will be. It makes me so much more conscious of my consumption. Now I'm just trying ... Tue, 4 Aug 2009 10:02:27 EST Manistee, Michigan vacation http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2258236 Officially this is day 10 of our 12 day vacation. 2 days are travel days. Today is the first day I feel on vacation. I'm finally off all meds - it's been 24 hours. I feel so much better. I think the meds were part of the problem. We spent 4 days at a lake by Kalkaska, Bear Lake. It's turquoise blue with white sand, you can see 20 feet down, incredibly beautiful. I canoed, swam, paged through magazines. We hunted (and found! ) petoski stones. We're staying in a grand farmhouse my part... Sat, 25 Jul 2009 11:12:51 EST vacationing http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2256477 Getting over the hump of healing. Still trying to reduce meds. Started eating. Started walking. Still fairly weak. It's amazing how much strength you can lose in 19 days of inactivity combined with minimal food, water and sleep + pain and meds. I feel I lost some muscle. I'm committed to building my strength back up. It may be a slow journey, still recovering. My tongue is still 20% numb. That really affects my ability to swallow and taste food. My desire to eat is very low between ... Fri, 24 Jul 2009 14:42:43 EST withdrawing from oxycodone http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2233776 It's a job. Balancing the need to manage pain and the process of withdrawal is tough. Tonsillectomies are not for the faint of heart. Side effects of drug - versus - side effect of withdrawal - versus pain. The pain keeps me from sleeping, eating and drinking. Not too great for quality of life. The drug keeps me on the manic edge of crazy. Today is my partner's 50th birthday. I can't eat. I can barely sip water. I'm counting the minutes until my next dose of roxicet. I'm adding in t... Thu, 16 Jul 2009 11:27:16 EST tonsillectomy is tough http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2228348 I was so drugged when I did that last blog. I can't believe I could write. It's been really down hill since then. I'm still drugged, oxycocone. Now I have to start withdrawals after 9 days of being on it 24/7. I had my right tonsil removed due to a lump (no cancer - yeah), they discovered an extra bone (eagle syndrome) and cut that out too. I only had one tonsil out, folks who have 2 -whew. The pain, according to many others, is worse than childbirth. A kidney stone was nothing compare... Tue, 14 Jul 2009 13:35:09 EST Update: surgery and walks http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2207737 This morning I had surgery on my throat. I have to wait a few days for pathology. That's hard. I can't eat as a stress response because it hurts to eat - fluids only - that's no fun! I'm not supposed to exercise for 2 week! Not even bending down (or stooping ). I can only lift up to 15 pounds (that's less than the free weights I'm working out on <em>20</em> )! So, I do some positive thinking, try to enjoy the pain meds and appreciate the potential for the side effect of weight loss from... Mon, 6 Jul 2009 20:10:11 EST No lying to myself, I walked-in mystery. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2200346 Last night it was 10:30, I'd been playing tetris shadow on the wii. I was avoiding life. I'd spent most of the day (after a bad day on wall street) running errands and being poked and prodded by doctors. I was thinking about my last blog and my commitment to walk. It was a 95 degree day! I rationalized I could count my steps down the halls of the hospital, you know how long those are.... I figured realistically that would be 5 minutes - max. I was ready to go to bed and I was going to let t... Fri, 3 Jul 2009 12:13:53 EST 100 days of walking http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2197839 Today is day 1 of 100 days of walking. I'm walking my way to health. I'm walking my way to adventures. I'm reclaiming my mobility. I'm reclaiming the choices that come with mobility. I'm gonna walk every day, somewhere, even if it's just through the grocery store. No more days sitting: in front of the computer - tv - video game - table - desk. I MUST walk somewhere. There is a path across the street from my house! There are malls, parks, rivers, ocean, the Pacific Crest Trail, waterfal... Thu, 2 Jul 2009 11:19:36 EST