CRYSALLIS1's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=CRYSALLIS1 CRYSALLIS1's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ And Spring Begins http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6348643 First night of camping for the season. Gentle little thunderstorm with the sound of rain pitter pattering on the roof. Love it!!!!! Ready to go on a hike around the lake tomorrow. Eager to what's new around town. Need to decide which church to attend Easter Services Sunday. No worries I brought lots of freggies with me. Planning on grilling some Chinese cabbage in a little olive oil tomorrow with a pinch of sea salt. Maybe add basalmic to eat it with? Wishing you all a glorious weekend.... Fri, 14 Apr 2017 22:16:52 EST The Journey to the Mountain http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6319869 I came to visit Spark Land in 2011. I loved what I saw. It's a beautiful friendly place. We are all on a personal journey with many paths. I have met some wonderful friends along the way. I'm very thankful for all of it. I have seen some success here. Consistency is my biggest obstacle. Getting momentum going time and time again is tough work. I have lost allot of ground this way. However, I'm definitely better off then I would have been if I never visited here. <BR> I have been read... Wed, 22 Feb 2017 13:04:26 EST Namast'e Spark Friends http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6319841 <img src="http://photosaws.sparkpeople.com/guid/907026d3-f018-41e0-9d1d-86c5b24332ab.jpg"> <em>88</em> Wed, 22 Feb 2017 12:07:52 EST Feeling Stronger http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6319113 I'm feeling a little stronger. I'm feel so much better having a plan again. I'm trying to forgive myself for wasted time. I'm encouraged that I have remained mindful of my program the past couple weeks. Signing up for a quilting class has also done wonders for my spirit too. <BR> I refuse to give up on my health goals. <em>88</em> Tue, 21 Feb 2017 00:00:28 EST More baby steps http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6318216 Last week I planned to do at least 10 minutes of exercise everyday. I didn't do that exactly but I did take some steps to better health. <em>543</em> <BR> I went to the mall or arena to walk 3 x last week. I walked about 45 minutes each time. I incorporated a few Yoga stretches into my day several times a day. <em>311</em> <BR> I signed up for a quilting class yesterday. My goal is to spend more time creating. Not just "thinking about" creating. <em>541</em> <em>53... Sun, 19 Feb 2017 07:41:46 EST baby step http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6315133 This week I plan to do some form of exercise 10 minutes or more everyday. Thanks Spark World for being here. <em>252</em> <em>532</em> <em>212</em> <em>334</em> <em>88</em> Sun, 12 Feb 2017 21:56:06 EST I Want My Rose Colored Glasses Back http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6314673 I miss Me. I totally miss Me. The last few weeks about every waking minute my stress level is at a 7 or more. I rarely settle myself down to less then a 5. Sometimes I have 2 or 3 vivid dreams a night which are pretty much nightmares. <BR> The last 5 years have brought some personal stressors beyond my capability "to fix". I found my way through and was doing pretty good. <BR> Unfortunately new stressors definitely beyond my control are taking the best of me. I have to force myself... Sat, 11 Feb 2017 23:19:15 EST I Think I Can, I Think I Can....... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6311452 I'm starting this week out much better then the last several months. I have been feeling mentally and physically a mess. I know the key to success is being positive and believe in yourself. The truth is I just didn't have it in me for awhile. I miss that part of me. Last week I pulled myself together a bit. My acomplishments weren't grand but they were enough to lead me back to the road. I find myself thinking one consistent thought. "I Think I Can, I think can.....And that thought m... Sun, 5 Feb 2017 22:32:56 EST I Vow to make my Fitbit Blaze Proud http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6273578 My challenges at work & home are still throwing curveballs at me. Mentally I'm focused and taking care of business. I won't mind if things slow up a bit though. I was awake most of last night but managed fine today. Food wasn't stellar but not too bad either. My mental self is doing ok too. I'm stressed but keeping things in perspective. <BR> The fantastic news is that my Fitbit Blaze came this afternoon. I have it all set up. I have a shiny new toy & a clean record! I Vow to make it pr... Mon, 28 Nov 2016 23:35:12 EST Mostly Highs http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6272657 Despite many challenges I'm so happy to say that I'm still taking care of me. Moved my mother & step father from a house to an apartment. They were totally unreasonable about what will fit. We planned & did well but at the last minute much more then planned made the trip. Finally had to leave them last night with a bed that was made, snacks on the counter, meds on the counter. I have to let them figure it out for awhile. We had a slow pipe leak which caused a mold problem at home. I had t... Sun, 27 Nov 2016 05:53:08 EST Happy Thansksgiving http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6271473 Happy Thanksgiving Dear Spark Friends. Thank you for all you have given me. Your support & encouragement means so much. Spark is the greatest invention ever. I'm truly thankful for this fabulous health forum. I have been super busy at work & home. I have had to burn the candles at both ends. Somehow I have continued to stay on track fairly well. With a little more time & planning I could of course do better yet. I have made a million wiser choices. Down 12 lbs. it's getting easier and easie... Thu, 24 Nov 2016 08:24:19 EST Others to Me-(Gasp) Your a Vegetarian???????????? Why?????? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6265889 So I'm really starting to get in the groove of eating the Nutritarian way of life. It's Dr. Joel Furhman of Eat To Live nutrition plan. Mostly vegetarian but the highest nutrient contents. Also avoiding flour, sugar, salt & most fats. I'm avoiding processed foods. I do eat lots of veggies, beans, fruit, berries, nuts & soy or almond milk. I use allot of fresh herbs and spices too. Look it up its very possible to get all the nutrients a person needs. I promise! <BR> I'm not anti-meat so I... Sat, 12 Nov 2016 21:27:11 EST The Journey to Better Then Normal Continues http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6263326 I'm not sure how to describe what I'm trying to do. It's more then reaching my goal weight. I'm a couple months into living more intentionally. I have a good life. God has been good to me. I spend most of my days happy & feeling blessed. I know & live my purpose in life. I try everyday to be the best me that I can be. My weight does hang over me like a black cloud. It doesn't keep me from doing much but it does steal some joy as well as a few years of my life. I have been challenged las... Mon, 7 Nov 2016 12:10:41 EST Three Weeks & Going Strong!!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6249062 I have been very busy doing allot of things right. My goals are pretty much the same as listed on my Spark Page. The entire Spark Program is all about building on one small step at a time. I have been very conscious about making numerous healthier choices everyday. I have given myself a break and not made this journey about the number of times I strayed away from my program. I have incorporated a few special treats into my program. Thus it does not feel like I'm cheating. I'm following m... Sun, 9 Oct 2016 22:49:21 EST I Vow to Find My My Way Back to Health http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6235438 My whole body seems to be creaking & groaning more the ever. Most of its not inevitable. I Vow to find my way back to health! I made some good choices today. I Vow to make more good choices tomorrow. I Vow to renew my belief in Me. <em>88</em> Tue, 13 Sep 2016 22:23:44 EST Encouraged http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6233516 I did receive a call later in the afternoon from the EAP program. She set me up with an in person life coach. She doesn't specialize in exactly what I'm looking for but I'll give it a try. This is such a personal journey there is no way I would speak right now to my employer about a program for health & wellness. Even if I did it would be a huge process to make it happen if at all. I'm sure they would be understanding but I share my personal struggle with very few people in this world. I ... Sat, 10 Sep 2016 17:46:04 EST I made a call for help http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6231719 I made a call to my employer confidential employee assistance program. I asked for a wellness coach. Someone is suppose to call me back. It was a really big decision. Making the call was hard. I hope they call me back soon. I have doubts that it was a good idea but I'm sure it will be fine. I'm addicted to food. I eat because I'm stressed, happy, bored etc. I'm an equal opportunity eater. I can't seem to stick to my program. I love my program. I have evaluated it a zillion times. Maybe this ... Wed, 7 Sep 2016 12:39:40 EST Day 5, I'M STILL HERE!!!!!!!!!!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6221293 Day 5 & I'm still here going strong!!! I'm following the Eat to Live plan. I'm so proud of the calories I pass up. For some reason that truly shocks me I don't even want those calorie laden foods. My resolve is somewhat of a miracle. I'm so happy!!!!! I'm away from home for 4 days and I don't have a scale so I have no new reports. Regardless of what it says I will continue on. I'm not only 100% committed but 100% sure this is the plan for me. Wishing you all a fantastic weekend! <em>88... Sat, 20 Aug 2016 08:00:26 EST Time for bed day 2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6220023 Stuck with my program pretty much 100% today. I have done meal planning for tomorrow when we go out of town. Depending on which restraunt we narrow it down to I have a plan. Unlike many past voyages I have been letting the people in my life know my plan & that I'm 100% commited. My daughter who is very fit gave me good advice. She said for 1 month don't have any cheat meals. She said I would be amazed with the results & won't want to cheat anyway. Sounds like a doable plan. I did not get a... Thu, 18 Aug 2016 00:04:52 EST Day 2 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6219527 Yeah, I lost 6.4# overnight! It's a great boost to my mental status. No, I did not eat too few of calories. I drank plenty of water & a cup of tea. What I did do was pass up drive thru food, chocolate, pretty little flavored coffee, a hamburger etc. Throughout the day I indulged in Gods abundance. Swiss chard, tomatoes, onions, peppers, & mushrooms. I ate within my calorie range of 1,200-1,500 calories. The dramatic overnight weight loss was beginners luck but I'll take it. I think one of th... Wed, 17 Aug 2016 08:41:31 EST Day 1 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6219442 I was able to stay in my range for calories. I almost sabatoged myself by not eating enough for breakfast thus not having enough food with me. I figure I passed up at least 1,500 calories of food today that I would have usually indulged in. Mentally I'm happy to be committed again to healthier living. I have gained a whopping 14# since spring. I was on a heck of a binge! Definitely time to do something. My back hurts & my knee hurts! Having GI issues too! I'm at my heighest weight ever 253... Wed, 17 Aug 2016 04:49:42 EST It's Official, I'm Denouncing the Crave it & Eat It Plan!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6218781 I'm really quite a mess with my eating. My plan has been I Crave it & Eat It. Basically it has caused me to pop a button on some new pants this weekend. Lots of weight gain. Food addictions. I'm a food junkyard! (Not a typo.) It's also caused a very achy back, knee, & feet. Not sure how I got into this mess again but this petty well sums it up. So I'm denouncing the crave it & eat it plan. I'm back on my Eat to Live plan. I'll post my progress as often as I can. Logging my food will be key... Tue, 16 Aug 2016 04:13:57 EST Contemplating My Strategy http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6215908 I'm so thankful for all the support. I need to come back to Spark People & friends. I'm searching for my first step. I'm tired & feeling hopeless. Somehow a small spArk remains. <em>88</em> Thu, 11 Aug 2016 01:07:44 EST How Do I Stop This? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6212410 How do I stop my daily cycle of over eating & procrastinating? <em>230</em> <em>228</em> <em>227</em> I can talk a good talk & I believe in my path to health as I have outlined on my page. <em>347</em> <em>319</em> <em>414</em> <em>550</em> There is only one problem I just cant seem to get started again. <em>249</em> My pictures are horrifying to me!!! <em>527</em> Tomorrow seems to never come. <em>88</em> Thu, 4 Aug 2016 21:38:36 EST July http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6194374 Just a quick note to publicly state my commitment for the month of July. I plan to get 10,000 or more steps everyday. I challenge myself to make as many right choices in a day as possible. I plan to keep track of what they are whenever possible. I plan to log my food each day. <BR> I owe several of you a huge thanks for being there for me even when my progress is like watching pInt dry. Wishing you a fantastic July! <em>88</em> Sun, 3 Jul 2016 23:46:57 EST Ready..... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6190212 Set......GO!!!!!!!# <BR> You can do this & so can I!## <em>88</em> Sun, 26 Jun 2016 22:28:15 EST I So Appreciate the Encouragement from the Spark Community http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6179325 Still struggling but making progress. I have my millionth respiratory infection this year. I also have a foot injury. Geesh!!! Frustrated but hanging in there. I refuse to give up. I owe so many Sparkers a huge thank you for your encouragement. Thank you for still believing in Me. Wed, 8 Jun 2016 22:45:29 EST Done with Whallowing & Self Destruction by Fork http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6177187 My body has suddenly become a train wreck. Years of bad habits caught up with me this past year. Multiple joint pain, tired, stress incontinence, respiratory infections, digestion issues, headaches. I don't want to face medications or surgery. I got by with poor habits for a longtime pretty much unscathed. Not anymore. I have allot of life I'm planning to live if the good Lord is willing. Time to take matters into my own hands & take care of this body. I know I'm in the right place for s... Sun, 5 Jun 2016 22:09:14 EST Would I Really Do Anything for Good Health? Apparently not yet. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6175028 I'm here barely. I have been a path of self destruction as far as eating. Many aches & pains in my body. This part is frustrating & scary. Arthritis has hit me in multiple joints suddenly. When I Eat right exercise I feel good. When I don't eat right or exercise I definitely can tell. Life is busy. Lots of good things in my life. Plenty of stressors that I think I'm managing ok enough. This is a somewhat empty blog for others to read. I just wanted to let my Spark Friends know I'm still... Thu, 2 Jun 2016 09:42:38 EST I Would Do Anything For Good Health! Really? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6137698 Last night I said to myself that I would do anything to regain good health. Then I laughed & thought ok you know the prescription for the best health possible. It's outlined on my Spark page. <BR> So am I willing to exercise at least 30 minutes everyday? Am I willing to get 10,000 steps or more every single day? Am I have willing to cut out proccessed foods full of carbs? Am I willing to mostly consume nutrient dense vegetables? Consume sources of protein other then meat? 64 oz. of water ... Fri, 8 Apr 2016 08:36:06 EST Sick Again http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6137435 Respiratory illness again. Fourth time in a little over 3 months. Fever, body aches & chills. Trying to take the recommended vitamins & eat nutrient dense foods. I cannot turn back. I'm so sick of feeling sick! <em>88</em> Thu, 7 Apr 2016 22:01:49 EST The Journey to Better Then Normal http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6134336 This moment right now is the moment I must truly chose to stay on my intended path. My side trips are killing me literally. Foot surgery followed by some complications has taken its toll on my body. I discovered I had arthritis in my foot & I'm positive it's in the other one too. Likely my knees have arthritis too. I have never really had much for back problems but I do now. <BR> I'm trying to get my 10,000 steps in everyday. It hurts sometimes but overall seems to help. Some days exer... Sun, 3 Apr 2016 22:58:32 EST Believing http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6119774 “By believing passionately in something that still does not exist, we create it. The nonexistent is whatever we have not sufficiently desired.”— NIKOS KAZANTZAKIS <BR> <BR> I just completed studying another chapter in Wayne Dyers book Being in Balance. His books & e-books are available on Amazon & Hay House if you're interested. <BR> <BR> I envisioned what my 10 th rung of the ladder person looked like. What is my personal perfect picture of health? Where are my behaviors towards this ... Tue, 15 Mar 2016 10:59:23 EST Living 1Day at a Time http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6114071 Today I will dress my best. My words & thoughts will be positive. I will be in prayer for those who need an extra dose of Gods presense. I am thankful. I will care for my body with nutritious food & drink rereshing water. I will strengthen my body & soul with Yoga & Spiritual Meditation. Have a great day my Spark Friends. <em>88</em> Tue, 8 Mar 2016 08:02:05 EST What am I hungry for? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6113031 Believe it or not I crave vegetables & fruits. I'm in the process of learning more about the uses of herbs as seasonings. I pretty much just shop the fresh aisle at the grocery store & a quick trip down the bean aisle. I think it's safe to say I'm becoming a nurtitarian. What's a nurtitarian? Someone who seeks the highest nutrient foods. Basically a vegetarian minus flour, sugar, & salt. Check out Dr.Joel Furhmans books if you would like to learn more. <em>88</em> Sun, 6 Mar 2016 23:56:05 EST Has anyone ever had activator chiropractor treatments? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6104906 Has anyone ever had Activator chiropractor treatments? If so we're they helpful? Chiropractor treatments are new to me. All I know is I want to feel better. <em>88</em> Thu, 25 Feb 2016 20:09:23 EST Great Book http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6103906 I just finished Dr. Wayne Dryers book 21 Days to Success and Inner Peace. It was a great book I read awhile back. To pull myself out of my blues I decided to refresh myself with its words. Day 21 was exactly what I needed. " If you make this an inner mantra: I intend to feel good, you can think of and picture yourself experiencing joy regardless of what’s going on around you. You can remind yourself that whatever you desire is on its way, in amounts greater than ever imagined. If you keep th... Wed, 24 Feb 2016 15:53:23 EST Crawling Out http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6103056 I need to stop by personally & thank the wonderful people who came to support me yesterday. I was really feeling down. I am sure I will feel better or at least be on my way to better health after I see the chiropractor on Thursday . This morning I took a step to better health and prepared several frozen fruit smoothies . They just need to be put in the blender and add a couple items on busy mornings . I am in the process of organizing my kitchen again. I'm limited what I can do with the kitc... Tue, 23 Feb 2016 15:22:10 EST Hitting Rock Bottom http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6102427 I'm pretty close to hitting the rock bottom of my personal health. I have been laid up for 2 months after foot surgery. I was optimistic & made the best of it. I lost a few pounds but somehow found them in the last few weeks. The Dr. believes there may be a problem with one of the screws. I'm praying the xray was just not clear or something. The boot caused havoc on the rest of my body. I'm totally out of alignment & having trouble getting around because of back, knee & foot pain. A chiropr... Mon, 22 Feb 2016 21:48:27 EST 38 Day Streak http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6086967 I am on a 38 day Streak of living healthier. I'm eating healthier foods. I'm cooking & eating at home. I am crossing several projects off my to do list. Most of the projects are related to getting organized. I have lost a few pounds along the way. My February goal is 10 minutes or more of exercise everyday. I'm a little challenged finding exercises I can do within my limitations from my surgery. Looking forward to finishing the month strong! <em>334</em> <em>88</em> Wed, 3 Feb 2016 16:44:39 EST 30 Day Streak http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6079459 Sorry this blog may be a bit boring. It's a good measure for me of my progress. I have logged on & been more mindful of my program for 30 days in a row. I had woke up from a slumber in November but wasn't quite in the groove yet. I did manage to keep my weight steady during the holidays. <BR> Logging on has kept my program in my thoughts. This has led to some positive changes. I have also done some soul searching which has led to some positive actions. I have cleared some physical clutter t... Tue, 26 Jan 2016 08:01:55 EST What's Missing from My Healthy Living Plan ¿ http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6077217 Still thinking....Do I really know how to prioritize? It's a much deeper question then I ever thought. Thinking about it much of the week. The true answer will make a big difference in my life. <BR> <BR> I also need to incorporate rewards into my program. I use to think the weight loss would be enough. Obviously food rewards are not the way to go. Thinking on this too. <BR> <BR> Consistency is always my downfall. <BR> <BR> I'm open to thoughts & recommendations. <em>88</em> <BR> <... Sat, 23 Jan 2016 17:21:59 EST Oh My! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6075757 Yikes I'm an aching unit tonight. I accomplished some big things on my list but way to much standing. I need to avoid doing that again for awhile. My everything hurts. <BR> My evening meal was fair at best. I spent too much time preparing it. I even sat to do the chopping. I think I need cooking lessons. I can cook Midwestern affair quite nicely but not vegetarian apparently. I may just need to keep it simple. It's cold out right now so raw veggies are not what I'm looking for. I truly d... Thu, 21 Jan 2016 20:57:58 EST Do I Really Know How To Prioritize? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6075327 Feeling more energetic then I have in a month or so. Because of surgery won't be able to do exactly all that I would like to but nice to have some energy. <BR> Somehow I strayed from tracking my food. I'll get back to that today. Geesh I need to keep an eye on myself all the time!!! <BR> I have a totally nutritious vegetarian meal planned for tonight. <BR> I have slowly been checking off my to do lists. Mostly calls, research, emails etc that I was too busy or procrastinated previously.... Thu, 21 Jan 2016 10:45:15 EST Refining My Vegetarian & Nurtitarian Skills http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6073645 I have been looking up vegetarian recipes. The flavors are not second nature for me to put together. It's been interesting to read & understand the different methods. Most of the recipes have been authentic Asian. Yum! Thankfully not Americianized with cheese. I like cheese but not on pure innocent veggies. I'm also trying to keep them low fat. Many of the vegetarian recipie call for more carbs or more fat then I'm looking for. I can see how it could be possible to be an overweight vegetari... Tue, 19 Jan 2016 12:46:41 EST Oops & More then Optimisim http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6072565 Side tracked a bit this weekend. It's really quite funny how quickly the scale tells on you. I'm not actually upset that I faltered a bit. I know how those foods made me actually feel. They were definitely not as satisfying as they once seemed to be. I wasn't craving them. They were just on the menu & I imbibed. It was a great weekend celebrating my granddaughters birthday. Nice time with family & friends. I'm thrilled that I don't feel the need to chastise myself. I'm happy that my mind is ... Mon, 18 Jan 2016 10:17:24 EST I'm going to Cure it with Food, Prayer, & Meditation. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6069245 Still a little sick. Sinus pressure & vertigo. Vomited last night for some reason. I think the vertigo was the cause. Thankfully the nausea came & went very quickly. On my way to make some healing green tea. A fruit smoothy with almond milk, frozen apple slices from my tree, blueberries, Greek yogurt, honey, spinach & chia seeds. Got my eye on some fresh veggies for dinner tonight. This body sure has taken a beating the last month. I have to wonder if I would be this sick if I would have be... Thu, 14 Jan 2016 10:34:50 EST I hung onto a thread. It was stronger then I thought. http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6056391 Revisiting Spark & my program yesterday has provided me with a renewed spirit. I returned due to a Spark mail notification. My heart wasn't 100 % in my program but I returned to look around. <BR> My blog kept my mind going the rest of the day. I spent most of the day pondering what's wrong. Why have I not lost more then a few pounds in all this time? <BR> The biggest barrier is plain & simply allowing myself to let go of old lifelong habits Stress has been getting the better of me too. Spa... Thu, 31 Dec 2015 21:29:14 EST 2015 is ending "Now What"? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6055364 I have been here for a long time. I feel somewhat hypocritical. I feel like I'm wasting people's time & space on here. Perhaps I should delete my account or at least start over. I have reviewed my plans, goals, & progress. I still believe in my goals & my plan. I'm not going anywhere. If I do then I definitely won't succeed. I absolutely love Spark! December 25, 2014 my weight was 248. (252 that fall). March 2015 234 was my lowest :) December 21, 2015 244. Due to my foot surge... Wed, 30 Dec 2015 12:39:39 EST FINDING THE REAL ME HIDDEN INSIDE http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6032127 I could give you a zillion excuses/reasons for not meeting my goals. It boils down to being tired & worn out & running in an endless circle chasing my tail. In the end not exercising or eating healthy does not solve it. It makes it worse. I believe in everything I have written on my page. I believe I can do it. I know my program is the key to health & the right path for me. <BR> I'm going on a journey to find me the real ME hidden inside. I'm going to focus on consistency. <BR> Won't you jo... Sat, 14 Nov 2015 17:21:03 EST