COMPUCATHY's SparkPeople Blog COMPUCATHY's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Pace Car Journey I went to North Carolina and back over Thanksgiving. It was a long drive ... Over 9 hours ... And I did all the driving. One thing that helped me was finding a car in the traffic that was going the pace that I wanted to go and just following along and using it as my "pace car". Since my cruise control doesn't work, it was nice to just follow along and not have to worry about my speed all the time...the pace car did that for me. <BR> <BR> Today I weighed in... Something I've been dreading.... Tue, 2 Dec 2014 07:05:43 EST Stopping...Beginning I've journey to thinness. I've really lost my way and gained almost all my weight back. <em>39</em> I weighed in this morning at 234. But at least I'm not at 243...which is where I originally started SP back in 2010. I had gotten down into the 150's. What happened? <BR> <BR> This new job, mainly. It's a good job. But very stressful. I went through a major ordeal with someone from management when I first started. It really knocked me for a loop. I ended up wit... Mon, 29 Sep 2014 06:56:52 EST Day 7/One Week Food Sober...Feeling Some Relief So, I really like all the encouragement I received on the deep fried veggies (yesterday's blog)...and we are going to the state fair tomorrow...I'm sure they'll appear there too. I don't know what I will have tomorrow...but I plan to keep things in check...and stay food sober. <BR> <BR> Today completed a week of being food sober. My big success today was giving myself a break when I could feel the stress getting to be too much...instead of pushing myself on. If I had learned to do this wh... Fri, 25 Jul 2014 22:34:39 EST Day 6 Food Sober...Listening to Fullness Cues Completed Day 6 of being "food sober." I didn't track as I went through the day but did enter all my tracking this evening and was in range. I just try to set a limit for each meal or snack as I go throughout the day so that, when I do the recording, I should be okay...and it worked. <BR> <BR> For lunch, my co-worker and I went across the street to the county fair. We shared a plate of deep fried veggies. We jokingly called them health food. They were good...and somewhat healthy...we ... Thu, 24 Jul 2014 22:41:53 EST Day 5 Food Sober...Stress and Weight Down Today was Day 5 of being "food sober" and I saw 225 on the scale...nice surprise. It's going down. But lately, I've been hitting about this weight and then slacking off and gaining it all back up into the 230's, then panicking and getting back on track. So, I know I really need to buckle down at this point, not feel "safe" and push on. It's the only way to break the yo-yo'ing. I'm wary and pushing on. <BR> <BR> It was a good day at work. My new girl is doing really well. I'm starting ... Wed, 23 Jul 2014 22:02:04 EST Day 4 Food Sober...Doing Well I had another "food sober" day...Day 4 complete. Work has been pretty stressful and the fact that I'm staying on plan is encouraging. It's not like it's a totally easy time in my life and I'm not being challenged there's nothing to overcome. The challenge is definitely there. But I'm taking it in stride and just trusting that things will get better. <BR> <BR> The scale has been encouraging the past couple of days. <BR> <BR> Tonight, I watched Extreme Weight Loss...sup... Tue, 22 Jul 2014 23:32:10 EST Day 3 Food Sober...Getting Stronger It was a better day today. I spent my work day training a new employee so that kept me pretty busy and mind occupied. Somehow, that lifted my spirits. Yay! <BR> <BR> My DD decided (on her own without my influence) not to go for the home in the bad school district. I'm so relieved. I really didn't see that coming. So, yes, I worried, a lot, for nothing. I'm really surprised and relieved that she changed her mind and that she was upfront with her husband about her feelings on it. I do ... Mon, 21 Jul 2014 22:21:06 EST Day 2 Food Sober...Feeling Low I'm coming to the end of day 2 of being "food sober." I have felt a little down all day. The scale was not kind this morning and that was not a good start to the day. But I still know I'm better off eating on plan than I am overeating. So, I've continued on...feeling good or not. <BR> <BR> It's been a pretty low-key day. I watched a couple movies, did some reading, did some cleaning and organizing. <BR> <BR> My DD and her husband are looking for a home and they put in a bid on a house... Sun, 20 Jul 2014 21:12:32 EST One Day Food Sober This journey is really hard for me. I have asked myself time and time again why it is so hard. Over this past week, I've asked myself this again and I've observed my behaviors with food and the "whys" of my overeating. I got an "aha." <BR> <BR> I am eating for the same reasons that an alcoholic drinks...for the same reason that a smoker smokes...and for the same reason that a drug abuser abuses. I'm trying to numb a feeling, trying to blur the sharpness of a pain, trying to raise my spir... Sat, 19 Jul 2014 23:17:57 EST Walking Myself Happy Took the dogs for a walk this we all are sitting here cooling down. It was perfect walking weather...sunny and low 50's! Sweet! 7,282 steps and it's only 9:58 am! Rockin! <BR> <BR> We have a family get-together today. I'm a little stressed...hence the walk. I wanted to get my endorphin fill before the get-together. I don't know why I worry over gatherings...I'm just not a group person. So, I thought the endorphins might help. I know it will be fine. <BR> <BR> Yester... Sat, 14 Jun 2014 10:21:15 EST Day One Complete...Onto Day Two! So, yesterday, I made it through the day...tracking and eating in range. That's hard on a hardest day of the week at work...because the phone calls are insane. But I did it...and so I began my streak. I have a goal of 100 days. <BR> <BR> Lately, I have been getting on track and staying on track for about 10 days...then going off track for one reason or another...and then struggling to get back on track. This has been a pattern for awhile...and I'm really tired of it. I'm gla... Tue, 10 Jun 2014 18:21:16 EST Day One Complete...Onto Day Two! So, yesterday, I made it through the day...tracking and eating in range. That's hard on a hardest day of the week at work...because the phone calls are insane. But I did it...and so I began my streak. I have a goal of 100 days. <BR> <BR> Lately, I have been getting on track and staying on track for about 10 days...then going off track for one reason or another...and then struggling to get back on track. This has been a pattern for awhile...and I'm really tired of it. I'm gla... Tue, 10 Jun 2014 18:21:16 EST Oh My Aching Back! Sigh...another maintenance day on the scale.'s will drop...just have to hang in there. <BR> <BR> I went a bit over on my calories today. But, the good things are...I recorded everything...I didn't run away and hide...even with being over, I have a deficit. I only went over about 350 calories...from snacking. <BR> <BR> I got all my fondant characters ready for the birthday party. I made 12 tonight...6 tigers and 6 lions. The lions are the hardest because of the mane. ... Wed, 5 Mar 2014 23:52:14 EST Love is...sweets? Maintenance day on the scale again today. I'd like to see a drop's hoping... <BR> <BR> I've been down/in a bad mood/in a funk all day today. Things were just more frustrating to me than usual. I knew it was "just me"...but I couldn't get over it. I just tried to keep quiet and not "spew" all over anyone around me. Anytime I opened my mouth, only negative junk came I just tried to not say anything as much as possible. I didn't sleep as much as I usually do...and I d... Tue, 4 Mar 2014 21:48:32 EST Me First? Maintenance day on the scale today. I'm cool with that. I'm glad I am still in position to move on into "new" territory...well, at least territory I have been missing for awhile. <BR> <BR> We didn't get as much snow as they predicted. So driving to work wasn't too bad. I'm glad of that. Work was okay. Then, I donated plasma; and then we met up with DD for a quick supper and I drove her home. When I got home, I worked on some more of the cupcake decorations for the birthday party Satur... Mon, 3 Mar 2014 22:39:04 EST Snowy Sunday with the Baby My weight was back down today. Yay! <BR> <BR> We did get the snow I was hoping we would not get. I went and picked up my daughter and granddaughter and took my daughter to work and brought my granddaughter home. It was really icy, but I didn't really have any problems with it. My car does well in the bad weather, thank goodness. Funny, Little Bronwyn was mimicking my squeaky windshield wipers on our way to her mommy's work. She had us cracking up. Then, on our way back to my house, th... Sun, 2 Mar 2014 22:31:00 EST Good Saturday My weight was up this morning, but I'm giving it a day to come back down before I record it...since yesterday, I overate...but not enough for a true weight gain...I didn't take in an extra 3600 calories! So, I'm trusting the higher number is just a fluctuation. <BR> <BR> Today we went to the local flea market and walked around. It's indoors...and huge! It took us a couple hours to walk up and down all the aisles and check out any of the booths that looked promising. We were looking for s... Sat, 1 Mar 2014 22:45:18 EST Stressed is... I forgot to weigh in this morning. I had a lot on my mind. Then it was a very stressful day. I've been trying to work my way back into a good, peaceful place after a very disturbing day. I overate, too. <img src=""> So, my tendency to eat when the going gets rough is still with me. I guess that's another belief system I have to work on. Somewhere in my head, when I am upset, I guess I believe that eating something sweet will help. ... Fri, 28 Feb 2014 22:20:39 EST Believing is Seeing Twas a maintenance day on the scale today. I'm okay with that...maintaining that new loss I got yesterday...very cool. I had a good day and got a lot done at work today. <BR> <BR> I spent time with my granddaughter, daughter, and son-in-law this evening. That was fun. I am extremely tired tonight. I have been donating plasma on Monday's and Thursday's and usually I come home and veg afterwards. But today, with their visit, I came home and went to work in the kitchen. I got kind of nau... Thu, 27 Feb 2014 21:54:39 EST Joy Returns The scale finally gave in and showed me my progress today. Yay! That was a nice surprise this morning...after sleeping for 9.5 hours! Good night's sleep! I went to bed tired and down after my Fitbit loss yesterday. But things were definitely brighter in the morning and it was a really nice day for me today. So, I guess I am over my bummer feelings over losing my Fitbit. I do think I am going to save up and get the Fitbit Flex though. Two of my co-workers today showed me their Fitbit F... Wed, 26 Feb 2014 21:35:12 EST Fitbit Sadness Twas another maintenance day on the scale. I'm hopeful a drop is on the horizon. <BR> <BR> Over lunch, I grabbed a quick bite and then went browsing at my favorite thrift store. I found a couple of things and then headed back to work. I realized when I got back to work that my Fitbit was missing. <em>234</em> Ugh. I retraced my steps in the office and didn't find it anywhere. I sent out an e-mail to my co-workers in case any of them found it. No luck. After work, I went back to th... Tue, 25 Feb 2014 20:31:42 EST Breaking Free from Emotional Eating Still maintaining...with no new downward movement. I am continuing to eat in range. Today, I had a pretty good day "step wise." I still didn't hit 10,000 steps. But I did do some walking during my lunch hour so, even with the sedentary work day, I had an increase over my usual work days. <BR> <BR> Today, I finished the Breaking Free from Emotional Eating book. I think I learned a lot from it and I'm sure it will be a re-read in the future. Currently, I don't think I have been doing mu... Mon, 24 Feb 2014 22:48:39 EST Healthy Eating Sunday Another maintenance day on the scale. It was discouraging to me today. But, you know, what's the alternative? Eat all my feelings and emotions under and face only the possibility of gaining or maintaining as a result? Nope...that's really not attractive to me. I'd rather be doing the "right" thing and waiting and hoping for the results to start to come about than to be self-sabotaging my hopes daily with food. It will happen. I will continue to give it time. If a month goes by, and I ... Sun, 23 Feb 2014 21:48:57 EST Creative Successful Day ANOTHER maintenance day on the scale today. Come on! So, I made some extra effort with my movement today. I am eating in range every day...but that alone is not getting the scale to move. I really didn't think I would have to increase my activity until I had been on track and lost some weight. But, it looks like I was wrong. So, today, when I was watching a show on Netflix and no one else was up yet, I paced back and forth through my living room and watched the show. I racked up 3,000 ... Sat, 22 Feb 2014 23:50:20 EST Two NSV's It was another maintenance day on the scale today. I'm still not discouraged, though. I recognized two NSV's (non-scale victories) today. One, I wore my jeans that had been washed and dried in the dryer and they fit GOOD...right off the hanger...even with a little room to spare. I had been wearing them and not washing and drying them so that they would fit in their stretched out state. But with the streak of eating in range, I noticed them starting to get loose. So, I decided to wash an... Fri, 21 Feb 2014 22:14:52 EST Compassion Fatigue I'm super tired. It was a maintenance day on the scale today. I feel like it will move soon. I just have to stay the path...and I am. <BR> <BR> I read some good stuff in my Breaking Free from Emotional Eating book today. It talked about compulsions and how they happen quickly and smoothly often before we realize it. We move to them to avoid pain. It states that we think we should not experience pain...and so we avoid it and try to get over it quickly when it hits us. So when we find o... Thu, 20 Feb 2014 22:06:35 EST Wellness Ideas To Try Today was a maintenance day on the scale. Work was a lot of work today. Meeting in the morning, then another meeting, then "putting out fires" throughout the day. Yikes. But I got through it okay with a good attitude. It didn't get me down and I'm happy with myself for taking it in stride. <BR> <BR> In the comments on yesterday's blog, Challenger75 said " Do you do Balance Rewards through Walgreens? You can get "points" for those daily weigh-ins, as well as activities that you record, t... Wed, 19 Feb 2014 22:03:28 EST Keeping Weigh-Ins Positive I got a little downward movement on the scale today. Yay! Since I weigh in everyday, I have to be careful that it doesn't discourage me when it doesn't move or when I see a fluctuation on the scale. The reason I weigh in daily is I do not want to miss the low numbers when they do show up. I know that, when I am eating in range, there is no way that I can be gaining. So, if I get a higher number in the morning after a day when I've eaten in range, I know it is just a fluctuation...not a r... Tue, 18 Feb 2014 22:34:17 EST My Thin Bucket List It was another maintenance day on the scale today. But that's will move...I will persist. <BR> <BR> I've started a Thin Bucket List in the Note app on my phone. I'm enjoying adding things to the list as I think of them. It keeps me positive and looking forward to things I would like to see happen "some day when I am thin..." I think the list is a good idea because before when I did get my weight down, I couldn't remember what things I had wished for when I was heavier that I k... Mon, 17 Feb 2014 22:19:15 EST Prepared for Success Today was a weight maintenance day. I'm pleased. I had a good day. I went to the grocery and bought a few things...but walked up and down every aisle to get some steps in. <BR> <BR> Then I came and started the crock pot with the Salsa Chicken recipe...and didn't have any chili I made another quick run to Dollar General to pick up the spice...50 cents...yay! The Salsa Chicken smelled good all day and tasted delicious. DH had seconds and DD loved it and is excited about taking... Mon, 17 Feb 2014 00:27:18 EST Scale and Tracking Victory Today I saw my coveted downward movement on the scale! Yay! It was really good to see and helped me today to make extra effort to pull off another in-range day. We were out and about today...despite the snow. The roads weren't bad. And we ate two meals out. The second one was at a DQ restaurant. Yikes! All those pictures of ice cream desserts staring me in the face! It was my final meal of the day. I had not entered my tracking...but was keeping track, basically, in my head. We had... Sat, 15 Feb 2014 23:21:58 EST Happy Valentine's Day! HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY! I had a good one. No movement on the scale again today. I refuse to be discouraged. It's just slow going. But I have always been the slow, cautious maybe my weight is just being "like me." (You know...the old "measure twice, cut once" personality.) So, it's okay...I will hang in there. <BR> <BR> I had a nice Valentine lunch with my daughter and a co-worker. They're good company and I enjoy listening to their young perspectives on things. After lunch,... Fri, 14 Feb 2014 22:03:18 EST Slow Good Another day in range...on the high end...but in range. Yay! I was tired today. I've been up until midnight the past two nights...and I'm usually an "in bed at 10" girl. I can tell the difference. It looks like I'll make it to bed by 11 tonight. Guess I'll spend my weekend catching up on my sleep. <BR> <BR> I wonder if that's why I was "wanting" something sweet after supper tonight. I know that when you are tired, it triggers extra food desires. Hmmm...probably. When I first began wi... Thu, 13 Feb 2014 22:54:11 EST Eating Victories I managed another day in range and logging a nice deficit...over 1,000-calorie deficit. I was thinking tonight, when I was preparing supper and updating my calorie tracker, tracking my calories and seeing my number come into the day's calorie range, really helps me to curb my evening eating/snacking problem. Once you see that number come into range, it's like crossing the finish line for the day with your eating. You've need to keep thinking about food and what you can or cann... Wed, 12 Feb 2014 21:58:26 EST Good Day...Quick Entry Quick one tonight... <BR> <BR> Did well today. Saw downward movement on the scale. <BR> <BR> Had dinner with my daughter, son-in-law, and granddaughter. Fun! I ate in range and tracked. I saved up some calories for the evening meal. Then we worked on cake and cupcake decorating...and I did not indulge. Victory! <BR> <BR> Now, I'm getting my 10 minutes of exercise in and doing this entry to stay on track. I'm not in the all-or-nothing thinking...just feel that a step in the wrong dir... Tue, 11 Feb 2014 23:57:46 EST Good Edgy Day and Healthy Snacks I had a good day today...movement-wise and eating-wise. I saw a slight drop on the scale this morning so that was encouraging. I could feel my emotions being more on edge than they had been over the past few months of being off-track. The overeating seems to take the "edge" off things for me. But I am confident that I will adjust and the edge will fade over the weeks to come. I'm just going to hang in there, eat right, keep increasing my movement, and reading motivational and educational... Mon, 10 Feb 2014 20:54:30 EST From Set Come Back Long time no "see." I can't believe my last blog entry was October 19th. Yikes. And since that time, weight-wise and food-wise, I have been VERY off-track. <em>40</em> <BR> <BR> But it's okay...because I'm back. I weighed in today. I have my Fitbit charged up. I spent quite a bit of time this morning going through the new format on SP and set up my goal board, etc. I read the 4 featured articles. I checked in with a few of my Spark Teams. I'm back. <BR> <BR> I've tracked all m... Sun, 9 Feb 2014 15:16:37 EST How Is It Going? I'm finally feeling the flame again. I've been really lost for about a month. That old, bad, "eat with no restrictions" way of life is so easy to fall back hard to get back out of...and is not a happy place. That's where I've been. I have very much been enjoying having DD home for awhile (before she moves to Texas)...and having my little granddaughter here...what a super blessing. You would think with all of that I would be in heaven and happy, happy, happy. But honestly, when... Sat, 19 Oct 2013 07:29:25 EST Good Karma Had a good day. I didn't record my calories until the end of the day...and they totaled 1550! (And my range is 1200-1550) Close one. I really need to do them throughout the day and preferably before I eat. But, I'm pleased I'm a pretty good guestimator. <BR> <BR> I enjoyed meeting up with DD and GD at lunchtime again today. My co-workers joined us and enjoyed meeting little Bronwyn. Oh, such a cutie! <BR> <BR> One of my co-workers was giving away 2 Reds tickets and I got them ... Tue, 24 Sep 2013 23:13:30 EST Great Family Day First day back to work today after being off for a week. My co-workers were very happy to see me. That was nice. <BR> <BR> DD and GD came and picked me up for lunch. That was nice. We ate lunch out together. My one co-worker came out with us, too. It was fun to have her meet my DD and GD. GD did well. She is learning to eat peas. <em>4</em> I fed her and gave her her bottle before heading back to work. What a nice break in the middle of the day...great de-stressor. <BR> I got... Mon, 23 Sep 2013 20:32:52 EST Food Fog, Aha! Day 1 of Back on Track went pretty good. Here's how I did with my goals for yesterday... <BR> <BR> My plan... <BR> 1. Eat in range. (Range was 1200-1550, I stopped at 1220) <em>248</em> <BR> 2. Exercise...Wii or walking. (I did 15 minutes of Abba Dance with the Wii...pretty half-hearted, but I did it.) <em>248</em> <BR> 3. Read...keeps my mind moving forward and my emotions in the logical zone. (I read about 15 minutes in my Shrink Yourself some good aha's...the ... Sun, 22 Sep 2013 09:03:13 EST Wyoming to Ohio...and Back on Track I just got back from Wyoming. DD and I drove from her house in Wyoming to my house in Ohio! ...with her 6-month-old baby and her two dogs. They are going to stay with us until December. Her husband is getting out of the service and has a job lined up in Texas. So, in December, they will be moving to TX. I'm so THRILLED to have them here for a couple of months! I get to be a grandma! Long-distance grandma-ing is tough on the heart. This will be so fun! <BR> <BR> The baby and the dogs... Sat, 21 Sep 2013 08:43:00 EST Getting My Life and Eating To Work Together I'm doing "okay." This past weekend was fun...DH and I went away for the Brown County, Indiana, and we walked and shopped til we dropped. Fun! But I did eat too much...and I hated it. I felt terrible...physically as much as mentally. I think it was a good "sour milk" help push me back into tracking and eating in range. I was so tired and was not awesome in that way. <BR> <BR> So, I used that negative to push me back into positive mode. All week I... Thu, 22 Aug 2013 20:01:20 EST Fun Family Weekend! Today, I was down a pound on the scale...recovery is underway! <BR> <BR> I had a day with DD planned for today. We went to a movie...the new Percy Jackson movie. Then, ate at Red Robin. I looked up nutrition before we left. I got their Apple Harvest Salad, no bleu cheese and no garlic bread. It was DELICIOUS. <BR> <BR> Then, we went to the thrift store. We got a lot of good buys. DD is working on her Halloween costumes. We then went to JCPenneys and got a few things there. I got ... Sat, 10 Aug 2013 20:53:00 EST 45 Ways to Overcome a Bad Day! So, today, I ate in range and recorded everything...back on track! And it didn't take me over a month this time. Just had one bad evening...slept...and made it through the next day. Voila! <BR> <BR> I blogged yesterday and requested advice on how to handle a bad day...since the way I handled it last night was by overeating...something I really need to change...I know there has got to be a better way. And I'm sure there is! ...especially after reading all the good advice from my SP fri... Fri, 9 Aug 2013 22:52:23 EST Bad Day...Need Advice Today's scale reading was the a maintenance day. <BR> <BR> The breakfast with the CEO was meh. It was me and 4 others girls from the company and him. Two of the girls pretty much ran all of the conversation. It's hard when you are an introvert and in an uncomfortable situation...and you have extroverts who talk a lot. I did have things to say and was able to manage a little bit. But it was mostly listening to a lot of stuff that was unrelated and personal from the other two la... Thu, 8 Aug 2013 21:11:12 EST New Swim Suits! Today's scale reading showed down 0.6. Yay! I got a good night's sleep last night. I was still a little tired and down this morning while I was working so I decided to go out for lunch to perk me up and lift my spirits. <BR> <BR> I decided to drive through Wendy's and then check out a new (new to me) Liquidation store near work and home. It was interesting to browse through. The owner told me that he gets stuff from Costco and Sams Club and Sears. He had clothes and househol... Wed, 7 Aug 2013 20:38:54 EST Tired Day Survival Today was a tough one...but I made it. Tracked and in range. The scale had no new news this morning...another maintenance day. In a way, I think it was a good thing, mentally...because I know I need to eat in range to ASSURE that I do not gain. If I eat in range, staying the same or losing is a given. But, if I fudge around, I am tempting fate...especially when the scale is not moving quickly anyway. <BR> <BR> I was super tired today. I stayed up too late last night helping DD with a p... Tue, 6 Aug 2013 20:48:46 EST A Week On Track Makes a BIG Difference! No new news on the scale today. It was a maintenance day. I'll take it. I'm thrilled with this week's weight loss. Today completes a week of being on track. I started this week at 207.6 and ended, so far, at 201.4...but tomorrow will be the final weigh in to complete the week. <BR> <BR> I started with feelings of "I can't do this" and ended with feelings of "I can do this." <BR> <BR> I started with eating out a lot and eating a lot of junk food. I ended with eating in a lot and eating... Mon, 5 Aug 2013 20:10:33 EST Fun Flea Market Day! Today's weight loss was 1.2! Yippee!!! So, the good weight loss is continuing on. Guess my body really liked the exercise and fruits and veggies yesterday. <BR> <BR> I spent most of the day out with DH. We went to a local flea market...Trader's World. It's a huge Flea Market in Monroe, OH. We walked and walked and looked at so much stuff. We bought some Tupperware at one of the booths. We bought a salad spinner, 3 storage containers (with removable tabs that allow the right amount of... Sun, 4 Aug 2013 21:26:19 EST