COMPUCATHY's SparkPeople Blog COMPUCATHY's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Blue Suede Shoes! Completed another A+ day...ate in my new range, no binges or snack eating, and completed one hour of cardio. I just got done with the cardio and can feel it in my legs, shoulders, and back...definitely a workout. I guess the one good thing about being heavy, when you's really a workout...moving all that weight around. <BR> <BR> I have not been having many urges to fight against. But I have been tempting myself here and there just so I can practice saying no. The one temptati... Fri, 17 Feb 2017 22:36:29 EST A+ Day! Another good, binge-free day! Got my hour of focused cardio in. Also ate in my new, lower range. A+!!! <BR> <BR> I had my weekly weigh-in at work today. I'm in an 8-week Biggest Loser challenge at work. Last week, I had lost 0.5 lbs. This week, I was down another 1.5 lbs! Hooray! I was really surprised. I was hoping to just be the same because I had a couple of binge-full days this week. I guess the last few days of living binge-free made up for it, plus some! Yay! <BR> <BR> I ha... Thu, 16 Feb 2017 19:54:19 EST Whack A Mole/Urge! Another binge-free day! Yay! So, my new method of dealing with any binge urges that hit me are to "just say NO!" I kind of want the urges to that I can whack them down with a firm NO. This is the method that is working and that is discussed in Brain Over Binge. We learn that the lower part of our brain is producing the urge but the higher part of our brain has the ability to say no. The higher part of the brain has the ability to act...and the lower part does not. So, if the ... Wed, 15 Feb 2017 21:59:09 EST Brain Over Binge Progress I'm continuing to listen to the Audible book, Brain Over good! I really "get this" much good info...that I can put into practice immediately and throughout my day...and live binge free...omg...thank you! <BR> <BR> Today, I had no binge eating episodes. It was a nice, peaceful, happy, confident day. I had very clear thinking. Ahhh. <BR> <BR> So, continuing on this route. Today, I did not count calories or record my meals. I just ate each meal and tried to eat a portion ... Tue, 14 Feb 2017 20:36:54 EST Rational Recovery I've had a couple of days of overeating now. My last overeating episode of today was this morning at breakfast...crème-filled absolute favorite indulgence. <BR> <BR> I'm currently over it. And it's a nice relief. For lunch, I had what I truly wanted...Arby's Beef & Cheddar. It was the only item I had for lunch and I was physically full. When I got back to work, I had a 100-calorie Special K Pastry (chocolate)...and felt very satisfied. <BR> <BR> In the afternoon, I bought a... Mon, 13 Feb 2017 20:22:26 EST ODAT!! Yesterday was a bust...eating wise. I was out of control. I binge ate. Why? <BR> <BR> Mostly, anxiety got the best of me. I was feeling anxious about the day...not sure exactly what we were doing...trying to let DH decide as he has been cooped up for 2 weeks recovering from knee surgery. While waiting for his decision about where to go for lunch, I watched a show and munched...and munched...on chips. By the time he finally made a decision and we left, I was full. But I ate a full lunc... Sun, 12 Feb 2017 08:13:54 EST Step 9 POA This morning, since I don't have to hurry through my morning routine to get to work, I took the time to read through all of my writings in my OA workbook. I have completed the steps up through Step 9. In reading my writing in Step 9, I realize I have not followed through on what I need to do there. <BR> <BR> In Step 9, we commit to righting the wrongs we have done to others. We examine how we can right the wrongs. As I went through my self-inventory, I came to the conclusion that through... Sat, 11 Feb 2017 08:16:13 EST God's Got This! Continuing the journey... Yesterday, I ate just a little over my range. I was cold all day at work. Then, when I came home and fed the dogs, I realized I needed to pick up dog food. So I got everyone fed, watched a couple of shows and then headed back out into the cold (19 degrees) to go to Dollar General for dog food and snacks for DH. <BR> <BR> I 100% did not want to go. So, I said to God, "I cannot do this...I need you to do this." As I got ready and got into the car, I started to f... Fri, 10 Feb 2017 07:57:13 EST Feeling a Little Self-Doubt I had another good, on-plan day yesterday. I got a lot of work done. I watched the GD's over my long lunch hour. I bowled in the evening. I lived peacefully and happily. <BR> <BR> I'm looking at my weight loss. I've lost 5 lbs in the last two weeks. However, I lost all of it between 1/24 and 2/2...then nothing...just staying the same for the past 7 days. During those 7 days, I've eaten in range everyday. It makes me wonder if my weight will continue to drop or just stay here forever.... Thu, 9 Feb 2017 07:03:27 EST Surprise Message! Yesterday, God blessed me with another good, but very tiring day. I ate in range, got a lot of work done, and watched the GD's after work. <BR> <BR> I took the movie, Trolls, with me to their house. Very good, entertaining movie. The quote that struck a cord with me, the most, was toward the end of the movie, when Poppy said, "Happiness isn’t something you put inside you. It’s already there. Sometimes you just need someone to help you find it." I was, Poppy...all us com... Wed, 8 Feb 2017 06:53:23 EST Being the Passenger! A good Monday! Met up with DD2 and the GD's for lunch. The girls were a bit wound up so I offered to come over after work and go with them to the mall so the girls could play out their extra energy in the play area. I was seeing signs of cabin fever...and DD was a bit on edge as well. <BR> <BR> So, after work, we all went the mall and the girls played and played. They wore themselves out. Hurray! <BR> <BR> Driving home from DD's house, I was thinking about the journey of change with my... Tue, 7 Feb 2017 07:19:20 EST On-Plan through Party Day! I had a good Super Bowl Sunday. DD1 and her boyfriend came. DD2 and the GD's did not come. First, they were napping, then she was wanting to work on her housework, then she said she was not feeling well. She is in her first tri-mester with her third pregnancy and having a lot of nausea and dizziness with this one. <BR> <BR> So, it was a low-key but fun get-together. We watched two football movies...Wildcats and The Draft. They had not seen either of them...and really enjoyed them. T... Mon, 6 Feb 2017 07:41:58 EST Fun, Busy Super Bowl Sunday! Had a good, productive day yesterday. I had ideas about my Super Bowl party and rearranging my living room. I told DH about them. He can't really help right now while he's laid up with knee surgery recuperation. But he's a good consultant. I took our Christmas decorations back and put them in storage. Then I went to Dollar Tree and purchased stuff for the party. Then I stopped at the grocery and picked up food for the party and for our week ahead. <BR> <BR> When I got back home, I bro... Sun, 5 Feb 2017 08:57:35 EST Fun Blessings! I had a pretty good day yesterday. I worked a couple hours in office...then had a long break out of the office...then worked a couple hours in office to close down for the week...and stay within 40 hours for the week. <BR> <BR> During my time out of the office, I did some thrift shopping and got together with the DD's and GD's. During my thrift shopping, God blessed me with a new bowling ball for $1.99. Fits my hand good and is a pretty red and a little lighter than my current ball, "Patt... Sat, 4 Feb 2017 09:51:45 EST Routines and Eating Change! Still doing well...staying on plan...seeking God's help with my willingness and ability to stay on plan! He's doing great! <BR> <BR> Today is going to be a weird work day. I'm going in this morning for a couple hours and then working a couple hours at the end of the day...trying to stay within 40 hours for the week. So, I am thinking of meeting up with DD1 at lunch and maybe doing some shopping or going bowling in the middle of the day. Those are my two go-to "fun" activities currently. ... Fri, 3 Feb 2017 07:09:33 EST Such a Fun and Happy Day! I had the best day yesterday! Highlights were the Souper Bowl lunch we had at work...sampling 8 different chili's and then voting for our favorite. The one I voted for won! They were all good and it was really hard to decide. We also had jar guessing many were in the jars...they had Reese's mini's in one, lifesavers in one, and oyster crackers in one. We also did football trivia, a word search and a word scramble...all packed into an hour lunchtime. I really enjoyed it! <BR>... Thu, 2 Feb 2017 07:13:01 EST Back to Work Wednesday! Yesterday was a long day of ice on/ice off for DH's knee...while working from home. I put in 10+ hours of work time. I got a lot done. Today, I am going in to the office to work. I hope DH will be okay and take care of himself while I am at work. I think he will, for the most part. <BR> <BR> I have bowling tonight. So, I will be able to come home from work, fix and eat supper, and then head out. I'm looking forward to it. I practiced again on Sunday and finally did better...more like... Wed, 1 Feb 2017 06:49:23 EST Healing and Turn-Around! DH is continuing to do well with recovery. We are icing his knee 20 minutes on and 20 minutes off all day long. He has a pain prescription to take which seems to be making him sleep but is managing the pain. <BR> <BR> Yesterday, I got my kitchen squared away and re-covered the corner turn-around. It was quite a job. We had a mouse get in and make a mess of it. I cleaned it all out and discovered where the critter got in. We have not decided out to block off the hole yet. So, I have ... Tue, 31 Jan 2017 09:05:31 EST Surgery Success...Good Day Ahead! We are back from the surgery center. DH's surgery went well. They repaired the meniscus and scoped out the knee. He's now snoring next me in his recliner. He has a few weeks of recovery ahead. <BR> <BR> I'm going to fix crockpot lasagna and head to the pharmacy to pick up his pain meds. I had a second breakfast this morning. I had my normal breakfast...but an hour earlier than usual since we had to be at the surgery center at 6 am. On our way back, he wanted me to drive through and ge... Mon, 30 Jan 2017 10:01:53 EST Carts and Hand-Holding Safety! Another good, on-plan day is under my belt. As I journeyed along yesterday, thinking about the analogy of the pit and the path and the cart that God can provide for me to keep going on the path when I cannot continue, I thought of my Granddaughters and outings with them. When we are in the parking lot, we always require them to hold our hands until we are inside. And sometimes, depending on the destination and which granddaughter is with me, I may want them to ride in the that we... Sun, 29 Jan 2017 07:37:24 EST The Pit and the Path...Revelation! I had another good, on-plan day yesterday. I'm finding my joy again. Yesterday, I was happy most of the time. What a relief! Happiness is a side effect of the food focus change that I never expect but that always seems to happen when I get on-plan. <BR> <BR> This morning, I again read through my writings in my OA workbook for Steps 1-3 and prayed my 3rd Step prayer. I got an analogy today as I read. In my writings, I talk a lot about the pit of despair, falling into it, and trying to... Sat, 28 Jan 2017 09:24:42 EST A Good, On Plan Day! I had a good day, on plan, yesterday. I stayed to the plan of eating 3 meals and nothing in between. I drank 10 glasses of water. I did not get my exercise in or do anything fun.,.like I had planned. I just worked. Hopefully, today I will get in exercise and fun. <BR> <BR> I had planned for my fun to be during lunchtime...but then the meeting that I had to attend from 9-12 turned into a "working lunch" and we were not out of there until1:30. Ugh. <BR> <BR> The account is finally almos... Fri, 27 Jan 2017 07:10:49 EST New Day...New Plan! It was another rough day yesterday. I have one co-worker who is REALLY trying to help me get through and out of this mess with this account. It was her account a couple of months she is very familiar with it. Part of the problems with the account occurred while she was working it and just never had time to resolve the issues. I am very thankful for her help. <BR> <BR> I bowled last night. My scores are still really low. I thought I would be able to have fun this week as I had ... Thu, 26 Jan 2017 07:14:01 EST Cannot do this? I am coming to terms with some "can'ts" in my life. Life is getting really hard. I had a full load...then a co-worker is off on sick leave...and I took on her load. Then, my husband went down with a bum I am carrying most of his load. I've tried to keep on keepin on through it all but I can't. I know God doesn't give us more than we can bear. So, I'm not sure why I am carrying more than I can handle. <BR> <BR> It truly is all too much. I guess my eating is a good barometer ... Wed, 25 Jan 2017 06:28:04 EST Popping Back Up! I didn't record my meals yesterday. I ate correctly for breakfast, lunch, and supper, but then in the evening, I had excessive snacks. I was cold and tired all day. I ended up taking a bath and napping in the evening. I finally got warm and felt a little better from the nap. <BR> <BR> Then, I worked another hour from home and went to bed. <BR> <BR> This morning, I'm craving sweets. I can see myself stopping at the donut shop on the way to work. It's happened. I hit have bou... Tue, 24 Jan 2017 06:52:24 EST Getting Physical & Exciting News! What a great weekend! It went way too fast. Is it really Monday already? Wow! <BR> <BR> I had a really physical day yesterday...lots of stairs, lots of steps, and bowling! Bowling with DD1 was the super highlight of my day. We had fun! I still did not score that well..but I had fun! I did decide on a different starting point for my approach. And I was getting so I could hit my mark when releasing the ball. So, I think I made great steps. <BR> <BR> Big news...DD2 is ... Mon, 23 Jan 2017 07:21:22 EST Good, Productive Day! Had a good day yesterday. DH and I went out for lunch, made a grocery list, and went to the grocery. His knee was killing him. So, I suggested he sit down up front and I would finish gathering all the groceries and then come and get him. So, he sat up front while I shopped. <BR> <BR> We came home and I got everything put away. I got DH set up in the recliner and started applying ice packs to his knee...20 minutes on/20 minutes off....while I did a dish-washing marathon. My dishes were ... Sun, 22 Jan 2017 08:20:49 EST Battle Won! Maybe there's something to that's darkest just before the dawn. Yesterday was a "good" day at work. I got a LOT done and feel like I am finally making some headway with this crazy account. Hallelujah! <BR> <BR> Thank you all for the encouragement and the prayers. I know they made a difference. The war is not over yet, but at least I won one battle. It's encouraging. Finally. Whew! <BR> <BR> So glad the weekend is here! I need to get my kitchen squared away, do meal plan... Sat, 21 Jan 2017 08:37:45 EST Work Woes Work continues to be awful. I have no choice but to just keep plugging along and hope that, at some point, it will be better. I'm to the point of asking for prayers from family and friends. Honestly, I never ask for prayers for myself. But I'm feeling so discouraged and miserable that I truly do not know what else to do. <BR> <BR> I seriously told my husband that I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown and hope this does not end with me in a psyche ward. He laughed. I told him, no, I'... Fri, 20 Jan 2017 07:09:02 EST Overcomer! Yesterday was trying at work. I had to intervene between a client and one of my workers...and I had to side with the client. I listened to both sides of things and made a decision that was not popular with my worker. I would have loved to back her actions and decisions up...but she was wrong and causing problems for the I had to reverse things. He had good points...he was right...she was wrong. I hated it but I had no choice. <BR> <BR> Afterwards, I reached out to my daugh... Thu, 19 Jan 2017 06:49:21 EST Understanding Cravings and Having Some Relief From Them! Yesterday was another good day on the books. I ate in range, exercised 120 minutes, did 10 flights of stairs, drank 10 glasses of water, and got 6.5 hours of sleep. I felt very sane and calm all a placid lake. I did not have any food is so nice to have a few days without peaceful. I thought, this must be what it's like for people who do not have an eating problem...this is nice. <BR> <BR> I'm not sure exactly what has quieted the cravings...but I'm... Wed, 18 Jan 2017 06:35:35 EST Moving Forward! Another successful day is under my belt! I ate just my 3 meals yesterday...actually ended up under my calorie range...but I figured that was okay...just left it there. I got all my steps in and did 2 hours of exercise...including 10 flights of stairs. Drank 15 glasses of water, though only 8 of them count toward the 5% Challenge team goal. Got 8 hours of sleep. Then, saw a drop on the scale this morning. Yay! Now, rinse and repeat! <BR> <BR> Things are still hard at work, but better t... Tue, 17 Jan 2017 06:56:19 EST Exercised to the Max! Sunday was another successful, on-plan day! Hooray! DH and I went out for lunch, then went thrift-store shopping, and then to the grocery. I found another crock-pot hook up unit at the thrift store...only $12.99...yes! Now I have three. I think these will be great for family get-togethers. I will be able to fix things ahead of time so that I can spend time with family instead of preparing food. That's my plan, anyway. <BR> <BR> I picked up some cute shirts for the GD at the thrift sto... Mon, 16 Jan 2017 07:04:56 EST Successful Day! Made it through the day...on plan. My weight is down this morning...coming off that new spike. Yay! <BR> <BR> I got more than 10,000 steps in yesterday. I was watching the GD's. So, while they watched some cartoons, I did my steps. GD told me "good dancing, grandma." I'm always telling her that when she gets up and dances with the music on the TV shows. Funny. <BR> <BR> I stuck to 3 meals with no snacks. I drank water throughout the day. It was a good, on-plan day. I didn't really... Sun, 15 Jan 2017 07:36:24 EST New, 8-Week Commitment The museum trip yesterday was fun. We went to The Children's Museum of Indianapolis. It's supposed to be the largest children's museum...according to their advertising. It is really big! 4 floors....many many interactive exhibits. The girls liked the Dinosaurs, the Doc McStuffins exhibit, the train exhibit, and the Playscape exhibit. They got to spend some time with their cousin who met up with them in the Doc McStuffins exhibit. He lives in Indiana. So that was fun. They were adorab... Sat, 14 Jan 2017 07:56:22 EST Museum Fun and Car Woes Still off-track with my eating. *Sigh* <BR> <BR> Going to the Indianapolis Children's Museum with DD and GD's today. We are going to see the Doc McStuffins exhibit and everything else that is there. It's a two-hour road trip to get there and two get back. I've packed a survival bag...for the kids and for me. I'm waiting for DD to come and pick me up. She was supposed to be here an hour ago. Hope everything is okay...I'm sure getting the kids ready is just taking longer than usual. ... Fri, 13 Jan 2017 09:06:04 EST Doing Better Whew....very tired this morning. Last night, I went bowling for the first time in many years. This morning, I can feel it. <BR> <BR> The scale is headed back in the right direction. Yesterday, I got an audible book...Positive Imaging by Norman Vincent far, very good. I did some imaging and it helped. I think this would be a good practice for me when I am facing challenges and needing to get a head re-set. <BR> <BR> Today, I am working, then watching the GD's for a little bi... Thu, 12 Jan 2017 06:48:21 EST Time to Let Go and Let God Wow...what a great group of people here on SP! So many of you left so much comfort and good advice on my blog yesterday! Thank you so much! I know I need to let go and let God....quit wallowing in self pity over this situation...and move on. <BR> <BR> I'm working from home today. I'm waiting for an oil delivery...we have oil heat. I figured the alone time would be good for me, too. <BR> <BR> Why do I eat when I am upset...when my "happy bucket" is tipped over? I think that's just it... Wed, 11 Jan 2017 07:16:17 EST Bad News... So, DH's knee is worse. He now requires an MRI and probable surgery. I feel financially threatened by it all...and am eating like there's no tomorrow. Ugh. <BR> <BR> On the bright side, work is getting better. I'm making progress with the messed up account. And yesterday was 10x better than last Monday. So, that's good. <BR> <BR> I know I just need to trust God on all this and lay the food down. But the realistic side of me is seeing into the future...and it doesn't look good...I've ... Tue, 10 Jan 2017 06:56:35 EST The Weekends Go Too Fast! I had a good Sunday. DH and I brought up all the games DD had in a bookcase downstairs. We wiped them down to make sure they were dust-free. We also wiped down the bookcase and brought it upstairs. Then we loaded it all in the Jeep to take to DD's house. <BR> <BR> We met up with her and her boyfriend for lunch. Then made a quick stop at Lowe's for a new kitchen faucet. Afterwards, we took the bookcase and games to her house and unloaded everything to her basement. That's one thing o... Mon, 9 Jan 2017 06:36:26 EST Good Saturday...Moving On! Had a good day with the GD's. We took them to a mall that has a nice play area and let them run and play for about an hour. Then, came back to the house for naptime. During naptime, we got our Christmas stuff down and packed up. <BR> <BR> I had a nice visit with DD when she came to pick the girls up. She stayed for a few hours and ate and watched TV and was nice. <BR> <BR> Not sure what we will do today...except we need to take our Christmas stuff to the storage unit. Oth... Sun, 8 Jan 2017 09:11:19 EST Doing Well, Tired, Losing Weight! Had a good Friday. I only worked about 4 hours. I had worked so much overtime already, I really didn't need to work for the hours...but did need to work for the workload. So, I got a few more things accomplished for the clients on this caseload. I still have not managed to accomplish all that needs done, but it's getting better. <BR> <BR> I spent the afternoon with DD's and GD's...I was feeling a little anxious about it because of the workload...even though I was into overtime, my though... Sat, 7 Jan 2017 07:00:43 EST On Top of the World! I'm feeling so good, it's scarey! I woke up early, feeling happy and excited and ready to get up! This usually is NOT the case. There's an excitement inside of me I have not felt for awhile. This morning, my weight was down. I'm near my pre-Christmas low. I had another good day of God's abstinence from overeating and eating on plan and in range. I also got my 10,000 steps in...while working overtime...only God can do that! <BR> <BR> Something has changed over the last three days. Now... Fri, 6 Jan 2017 06:04:38 EST Another Good, But Tiring Day! I had a good day yesterday. Work was hard but I let God lead me through it. Our slow cooker supper turned out good. I love coming home to a meal that's ready to serve up. Then, in the evening, I got my steps in. Yay! <BR> <BR> I took my car and dropped it off at the garage last night. It's getting an oil change and hopefully getting the squeaking when turning problem fixed. I'm also having him check two other things and give me estimates on those. I may or may not have them repaired ... Thu, 5 Jan 2017 06:26:48 EST God's Great Day! I had a really good day yesterday. I planned my meals for the rest of the week...mostly crock pot suppers. Then DH and I went to lunch and to the grocery. When we got home, I started our slow cooker meal for the evening. Since I had worked the day before, I didn't have to be at work until the afternoon. I went in for a couple hours and got as much done as I could. <BR> <BR> The slow cooker meal turned out good...and I felt like I was really eating healthy...stew meat and vegetables. I ... Wed, 4 Jan 2017 07:18:13 EST Realizing I Need to Turn this Over to God Yesterday was halfway good/halfway bad. First of all, we worked on the exercise room. We had previously set up a workout room in the basement but never completely finished it. In making our plans for 2017, we listed finishing this room as a #1 is so close...might as well finish it and get a sense of accomplishment before starting a new task. So that turned out to be an all-day project...mostly for DH. I wanted to help...but he was wiring lights which I cannot really help wi... Tue, 3 Jan 2017 08:38:33 EST The Key! Living Amends! I have so much new info, I don't know where to begin. I just read the SP article about how to lose 100+ pounds. It was very encouraging and had some info I had not heard before. It stated that we can gauge our needed calorie intake by multiplying our current weight by 14 or 16...then subtract 500 to 1000 calories to create a deficit for weight loss. 3136 would be my current "needed" calories...2136 would be my deficit number. Wow. That's way more than I have been shooting for. So, I gu... Mon, 2 Jan 2017 09:19:18 EST New Year...100% On Track! Happy New Year! This is my favorite beginnings...a chance to set goals...the spot where we are 100% on track. I used to tell my kids on the first day of school...just you have perfect attendance! That's how I feel about New Year's Day. Just think, today I have perfect compliance with my plan. <BR> <BR> What is my plan? Two things...eating 3 small meals a day (300-500 calories each). Getting in10,000 steps daily. That's it. I'm keeping it simple. I'm HOPEF... Sun, 1 Jan 2017 08:13:11 EST Rough Times I'm in the pit. ...gaining weight...overeating...exhausted. I know this cannot continue and I'm going to have to do an about-face. I'm going to work on that today and this weekend. It should be easier to work on when I am not being bombarded with more work than I can possibly accomplish. The account I have to cover for a co-worker while she is off is a mess and way behind. I'm doing all I can to straighten it out...but it's pretty bad. <BR> <BR> Last night, I dreamed about sleeping..... Fri, 30 Dec 2016 07:57:36 EST Dealing with Discouragement Yesterday did not go well. I was discouraged at work. I had no desire to go in...but I did. I worked in office until lunchtime. Then, I met up with DD1 for lunch. I felt WAY better after meeting up with her and talking. I went from a 2 to a 10. Then I finished out my day working from home. Discouraged feelings returned as I worked on a co-worker's account...that is a total mess. She is off for 6 weeks beginning today. So, I will be playing clean-up. Not happy about that. <BR> <BR>... Thu, 29 Dec 2016 06:28:23 EST