CHRISDEER's SparkPeople Blog CHRISDEER's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community anyone else have that respiratory thing that's going around? Ugh. Came out of nowhere, feels like strep, only I guess it's a virus... I'm finally feeling better, but it kind of killed my workouts for the week. On the upside, I didn't feel like eating, either, so maybe it's a wash. :) <BR> <BR> Thu, 4 Oct 2012 16:38:39 EST aaand we're back :) I'm so tempted to delete my last blog post. Wow, talk about speaking from a dark place and feeling emotions instead of eating them! Though I kind of ate them, too -- but not nearly as disastrously as in the past. Win! <BR> <BR> I changed my focus from "ME ME ME" to my friend. Spent some quality chat time with her while our kids played, gave her some black bean quinoa salad to make sure she's got her protein:) and got the hell over myself. <BR> <BR> And hey, the sun's shining, the air is cr... Thu, 27 Sep 2012 10:12:34 EST jealous of her eating disorder *headdesk* This is awful. Possibly trigger-y if you're anorexic -- I'm apologizing in advance. I'm being a pretty crappy human being today. <BR> <BR> So, my neighbor. She's gorgeous. Also incredibly nice, like the kind of nice where you wonder what she's up to, you know? But after a couple years living near her, my conclusion is -- she's just a really nice person. She's also recovering anorexic/bulimic who shared with me horror stories about a year in rehab, a body weight so low her organs were shuttin... Tue, 25 Sep 2012 16:38:18 EST This is where I would usually quit Seriously. Right about now, 2 1/2 weeks in, I'd usually be telling myself: I wasn't perfect. I didn't eat on plan every day and I didn't work out over the weekend and oh, crap, I had a beer. That's it. I'm too embarrassed to track anymore, EVEN IF I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN SEE IT. <BR> <BR> Oh, I'd still try to stick to my program (more or less), but I'd take the Spark thing'y off my toolbar and put it out of my head. <BR> <BR> But I really don't want to do that this time. I don't know if... Wed, 5 Sep 2012 15:39:54 EST Feeling my actual feelings. Ew. Yesterday was a perfect storm for stress eating. <BR> <BR> My husband has been out of town all week. The kids are still adjusting to the school year -- my oldest doesn't want to do math the way the teacher wants him to do it, and his Asperger's makes this an emotional thing. Tears during homework, yay. My daughter is doing great so far, but my youngest is dealing with a bully at school. <BR> <BR> Already. In first grade. <BR> <BR> I'm sick about it. E is bright and good looking and frien... Thu, 30 Aug 2012 11:05:19 EST Monday and I'm here! So. Not the best weekend. My dd's birthday was Saturday and I did fine at the party; it was during preparation that all bets were off. I get so tense, wanting everything to be perfect, wanting it all to be enough (for her, for my family, friends, etc.) Food is my drug. Sigh. <BR> <BR> But I felt good knowing I'd be back at the gym today and back on plan. Great work out this morning. <BR> <BR> Planning for a good week! Mon, 27 Aug 2012 12:35:39 EST