CHLOE453's SparkPeople Blog CHLOE453's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community The cold hard truth. This is a very candid blog with thoughts and feelings that I have shared with no one before today...things I have written even opened my eyes to what is really going on within me. I am hoping that seeing everything in black and white will help me in many different avenues of my life. <BR> <BR> <BR> Well this morning I got up and realized that I am on a downward spiral that actually scares me. I am gaining weight like crazy, not feeling good, out of breath all the time, legs/ankles startin... Fri, 5 Jul 2013 07:06:02 EST A very special woman Yesterday a very wonderful woman passed away, she was 99 years old and only 15 days until her 100th birthday. I knew this great lady for my entire life, she was our next door neighbor to my parents. She would always have candy or cookies for the kids in the neighborhood, very giving and sweet. The good lord has taken home 3 very dear people to me that had a big place in my heart all within the passed 6 weeks. Maybe I needed to view death differently than I once did...I do not know. I do ... Mon, 10 Jun 2013 10:22:22 EST Strange old vehicles! <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=" Fri, 7 Jun 2013 19:34:04 EST Life Another set back, I just found out yesterday that a very special guy (my first love) passed away on Monday. I have not seen him in several years, however there is still that special place in my heart for him and always will be. Funny thing is on Sunday I was thinking about him and some of the old times we had together....I had not done that in years. <BR> <BR> I am working hard on trying to stay on track....but in all honesty sort of blowing it. I am at least eating healthier things, just... Wed, 5 Jun 2013 12:35:08 EST Smile! It was the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. <BR> <BR> The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Flowers." <BR> "That's right!" the boy said, "But, how did you know?" <BR> "Oh, just a wild guess," she said. <BR> <BR> The next pupil was the sweet shop owner's daughter. <BR> The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of swe... Mon, 3 Jun 2013 08:10:00 EST Family....UGH! Everyone reacts differently to the death of a loved one. Some grieve silently, some need to talk about it, and some need to make "hell" on earth for other family members. I am unlucky enough to have the last one. I have two older brothers, one which is being very helpful and supportive (at least for the time being) and one that I used to be very close too but has now turned on me and is making my life unbearable at time. I am not going into everything right now but I do know that this is ... Sat, 1 Jun 2013 07:05:03 EST IF I DIDN'T HAVE A DOG OR CAT <em>239</em> <em>200</em> <BR> <BR> <BR> I could walk around the yard barefoot in safety. <BR> <BR> My house could be carpeted instead of tiled and laminated. <BR> <BR> All flat surfaces, clothing, furniture, and cars would be free of hair. <BR> <BR> When the doorbell rings, it wouldn't sound like a kennel. <BR> <BR> When the doorbell rings, I could get to the door without wading through fuzzy bodies who beat me there. <BR> <BR> I could sit on the couch and my bed the way I ... Fri, 31 May 2013 06:06:45 EST FUN THINGS! GAMES FOR WHEN WE ARE OLDER <BR> <BR> 1. Sag, you're It. <BR> <BR> 2. Hide and go pee. <BR> <BR> 3. 20 questions shouted into your good ear. <BR> <BR> 4. Kick the bucket <BR> <BR> 5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over. <BR> <BR> 6. Musical recliners. <BR> <BR> 7. Simon says something incoherent. <BR> <BR> 8. Pin the Toupee on the bald guy <BR> <BR> SIGNS OF MENOPAUSE: <BR> <BR> 1. You sell your home heating system at a yard sale. <BR> <BR> 2. You have to write post-it ... Thu, 30 May 2013 07:31:24 EST Trip to Italy ...LOL A young New York woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. <BR> <BR> But just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young man stopped her. <BR> <BR> "You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor, and we are off to Italy tomorrow. I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy." <BR> <BR> With nothing to lose, combined with the fact that she had alwa... Wed, 29 May 2013 04:42:39 EST Impossible Things To Say when Drunk THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: <BR> 1. Innovative <BR> 2. Preliminary <BR> 3. Proliferation <BR> 4. Cinnamon <BR> <BR> <BR> THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: <BR> 1. Specificity <BR> 2. Anti-constitutionalistically <BR> 3. Passive-aggressive disorder <BR> 4. Transubstantiation <BR> <BR> <BR> THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: <BR> 1. No thanks, I'm married. <BR> 2. Nope, no more booze for me! <BR> 3. Sorry, but you're not really ... Tue, 28 May 2013 04:59:56 EST A-Z about me! If you read it ... you have to do it ... have a little fun! <BR> <BR> A - Age: 48 years old <BR> <BR> B - Bed size: Queen <BR> <BR> C - Chore you hate: scrubbing toilets and painting <BR> <BR> D - Dog's name: Jaxon <BR> <BR> E - Essential start of your day: Feeding animals and enjoying a cup of coffee <BR> <BR> F - Favorite color: Gray <BR> <BR> G - Gold or Silver: Gold <BR> <BR> H - Height: 5'5" <BR> <BR> I - Instruments you play: Organ <BR> <BR> J - Job title: Have a Hu... Sun, 26 May 2013 19:39:24 EST A very rare but beautiful flower! A FLOWER ALL THE WAY FROM THAILAND <BR> THE VERY RARE PARROT FLOWER <BR> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> Sun, 26 May 2013 06:58:39 EST Somethings to make you smile! <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=""> Sat, 25 May 2013 11:12:54 EST Look alikes Found this site with look alikes...thought they were cute. <BR> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <img src=""> Fri, 24 May 2013 05:20:23 EST Where's my coffee?? <img src=""> Thu, 23 May 2013 10:41:47 EST Feeling good tonight. Good day today with healthy eating and getting in over 6700 steps. Still have the side yard to mow tomorrow along with washing the car and maybe starting to wash the house down with Simple Green. <BR> <BR> Hubby got into the doctors office, he got a shot of Kenalog, put on antibiotics, and got an inhaler...already seems to be much better....YEA!!! Will be glad to have him 100% again, this has been rough on both of us. <BR> <BR> Well turning in early tonight, it has been a rough few weeks ... Mon, 6 May 2013 20:36:19 EST Today Have a lot to do today with cleaning, paperwork, mowing and trying to get my husband into a doctor's office. Going to also get in some walk aerobics even though I will be push mowing later. <BR> <BR> Hubby is really sick with allergies and bronchitis....just do not need this added stress right now but we will get through. Some men do not seem to do sick well overall, mine is such a baby. Yes I know he is not feeling well but come on....he calls his mom and suddenly can barely talk or bre... Mon, 6 May 2013 07:15:36 EST Life can be difficult...but it can turn around. Well it has been a very hard few months, however now I need to start thinking about myself and getting on track with eating healthy and much smaller amounts. I am a stress eater so needless to say....I have gained weight, BUT I can and will get it plus much more off. <BR> <BR> In January we had to have my mom go into a rehab center because she kept falling. I would sit with her everyday for hours trying to make her stay as comfortable as possible. She gradually started to not improve so h... Sat, 4 May 2013 10:34:45 EST Like this.... <img src=""> Sun, 3 Mar 2013 20:56:04 EST Day 7, still going strong Well not much time to Spark the past couple of days or probably the near future. My mom is not doing well even though all tests are coming back ok. Not sure what they are going to be doing today but need to get to the rehab/nursing home to be with her. <BR> <BR> Healthy eating is going fine, lost 5 lbs since Saturday, still needing to incorporate my exercise into everything. I ordered a Striiv this morning to help motivate me and get me going in the right direction as far as exercise. Wa... Fri, 22 Feb 2013 08:46:06 EST Day 4 Today started off pretty well, then I went to go see my mom at the Rehab/Nursing home. The therapist and nurses were all concerned because mom has started to retain alot of water and was swelled up pretty bad. They talked to the doctor and it was decided that she be taken to the emergency room at the hospital. Well to make a long story short, she is ok and was taken back to the Rehab/nursing home. Of course she thinks I was the one that had her sent to the hospital so she is being real na... Tue, 19 Feb 2013 21:33:32 EST Came across this and wanted to share! Came across this and wanted to share with everyone! <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Tue, 19 Feb 2013 12:52:55 EST Pretty good day~~Day 3 THis blog was for late dollar short as usual....LOL <BR> <BR> Today went pretty good if I do say so myself. I had some will power challenges today when hubby bought doughnut holes and my daughter brought home McDonald's for lunch. I refused both and stuck with healthy eating, logging everything all day. I sometimes feel like my family is out to sabotage me when it comes to me living the Sparks way. The first week or two is the hardest for me because I am still craving suga... Tue, 19 Feb 2013 06:39:48 EST Lazy day today~~Day 2 Today was one of those lazy days where all I really did was clean and sort of relax. I did get all the floors steam cleaned, laundry and much needed dusting done along with wiping down all the countertops and appliances. I finished reading a book that needed to go back to the library this week and spent much needed time loving on all the animals.....a good day overall. <BR> <BR> I did not go to see my mom today which I do feel a bit guilty about, however I needed just one day to myself. I... Sun, 17 Feb 2013 17:57:06 EST My restart day! Day 1 Today was my day to restart my Spark way of living!! It went pretty well if I do say so myself. I was able to get in my full amount of water (135 oz) and ate relatively healthy overall. Feeling really good about this restart, I know it will have its ups and downs but I will try to prepare for them as best I can. Exercise is something that I will be also incorporating into this....but did not get it completed today due to nothing other than me putting it off, going to work on this. <BR> <... Sat, 16 Feb 2013 19:30:52 EST I am coming back very soon in full swing!! Hello everyone! <BR> <BR> Lots has happened in the last few months, good, bad and not so great. I am working hard to emotionally get through it a day at a time. I have gained back some weight which I am not proud or happy about...BUT I am working on gaining the strength and power to start my journey over again and lose my gained weight plus a whole lot more. Even though I have not been active on Sparks, I have logged in everyday and checked on my SP friends. Thank you everyone for hangin... Tue, 12 Feb 2013 07:49:14 EST This totally describes our household animals! LOL <img src=""> Mon, 31 Dec 2012 15:25:15 EST Thought I would share <img src=""> Sun, 30 Dec 2012 06:37:08 EST Old and Grey My vet posted this the day she put our Morgan down. <BR> <BR> <img src=""> Thu, 13 Dec 2012 13:46:36 EST Times can be tough Things just keep going from bad to worse it feels like. Yesterday we had to put "Morgan" down, for whatever reason her body started to shut down....she was put down with my husband and myself by her side. I am now going to be losing my "Bruno" kitty, he will be 19 yrs old this coming year and I have had him since he was 8 weeks old.....this one will be especially painful as we are really close. The vet nor myself can get his chronic diarrhea under control, he is loosing lots of weight, hav... Mon, 10 Dec 2012 17:04:45 EST Update on things...not all bad. Well things are a bit better right now or should I say I am learning to dealing with things better. I started my new job, however only stayed for a couple of days before I had to call it quits. The added stress completely took me overboard, I did nothing but cry during waking hours when I was not at blood pressure was sky high...180/110 (back to much lower now) and my feet and legs were killing me. I felt bad about having to quit but I know that it was the only choice. <BR> <BR... Wed, 14 Nov 2012 15:33:07 EST Yes things will eventually get better Well things have gone from bad to worse in the stress department, however I do know that I will make it through and get back on track in time. Not looking for sympathy from anyone...just a place to let everything out since I tend to keep it all inside usually. <BR> <BR> Last month my mom was found to have a large mass in her brain along with a mass in her lungs, yesterday we went to an Oncologist, he really did not have good news but we are trying hard to deal. Mom has agreed to a PET scan... Wed, 31 Oct 2012 07:06:23 EST Jaxon (pics) <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Jax outside enjoying the beautiful weather. <BR> <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Here is a picture of Jaxon taken with my daughters cell phone while he was laying his head on her our baby boy has grown (101 lbs now) at 19 months old. Tue, 23 Oct 2012 14:35:52 EST Setting new goals for myself Today I am re-starting my program (again) and resetting my goals. I have to start focusing on myself right now mentally and physically since I have been neglecting every aspect of me lately. I am totally exhausted all the time and could really care about anything other than just getting through the day....this is going to change TODAY. I can not change many things going on in my world...but this is one area that I can and will. I am going to be tracking all my food and starting my exercis... Mon, 22 Oct 2012 08:12:50 EST Update My mom is still in the hospital however she is now on the skilled nursing floor. We really have no new news as mom is refusing further tests at this time. They have cut back on her Decadron which is helping to keep her brain swelling down so that she can at least walk again with her walker....not sure how she will be today when I get to the hospital. I am sitting with her for 6-15 hours a day, very long and stressful days. I know I gained some weight, however I am now going to try and get... Sun, 7 Oct 2012 07:29:24 EST Really bad news Not really able to go into details, however my Mom fell on Wednesday and was admitted into the hospital. When she went down she bumped her head so they did a CAT scan and MRI to make sure she was ok. Unfortunately they found a very large brain tumor on the left side....I am holding it together for her sake. We are hoping to talk to the cancer specialist today, to get more answers. Fri, 28 Sep 2012 06:04:46 EST Changes that have to be made..... Well I am having a terrible time getting a grip on my life right now, it feels like I am totally out of control and spiraling downward. When you feel like this I think that everything seems alot worse than it really is. My eating has been out of control, it feels like my comfort right now....only it really is not...overeating is making me feel bloated and like a failure when I feel I have no control. <BR> <BR> So much feels like it is happening right now. My moms health is failing, she is... Tue, 25 Sep 2012 08:52:47 EST AvoDerm dry dog food recalled...FYI Email I received this morning that I thought I would share. <BR> <BR> Dear Dog Owner, <BR> <BR> At your request, I'm sending you this special alert. <BR> <BR> On September 11, AvoDerm announced a voluntary recall of one of its dry dog food products due to possible contamination with Salmonella. <BR> <BR> To learn which products are affected, please visit the following link: <BR> <BR> <BR><BR>ecall/avoderm-dog-food-recall/ <BR> <BR> Please ... Wed, 12 Sep 2012 05:16:12 EST Yes I am back Well my journey with Sparks has been a little side tracked lately due to things going on in my life. Daughter's boyfriend was staying with us for several weeks, my mom is still pretty ill and then me and my husband got sick. NOW I am feeling better, have the daughter's boyfriend gone and ready to eat healthy again and get on the right path. <BR> <BR> I want to thank everyone that stopped by my Sparkpage, sent goodies or left comments, it truly helped me find my way back much faster....jus... Mon, 10 Sep 2012 14:50:29 EST 10 lbs in 19 days of my restart! Ok...I admit that I was a bit disappointed this morning when stepping on the scales~~I was down only one pound since last Friday's weigh in. I then sat back and looked at the WHOLE picture of 10 lbs down in 19 days and was very excited. I have worked very hard these last 19 days with eating healthy and keep my calories under control, I have struggled a bit here and there and slipped up a few times with goodies but the portions were limited instead of all I wanted. Water intake was at least... Fri, 17 Aug 2012 06:54:33 EST Day 16 of restart. Still going strong overall and doing well with my healthy eating. Had a couple of small glitches shall we say with birthday cake, however daughter did make the cake with applesauce instead of oil so that was good. Still not exercising on a regular basis and have no desire too although I know that I would feel better if I started but just do not have the motivation. Water intake is going fine, getting in at least 100 oz a day. <BR> <BR> Wish everyone a good week ahead. Hugs <BR> <BR> Tue, 14 Aug 2012 08:51:08 EST Day 12 of restart! Well today is day 12 of my restart and I am down 9 lbs...WOW. I have really been mindful of what I am eating, trying to eat mainly fresh vegetables/fruits, lean meats and whole grain items. I did eat McDonald's last night (my birthday dinner) but I accounted for every calorie and it fit in fine although I would not want to eat that stuff too often due to sodium and fat. Water intake is going extremely well as I am getting in no less than 100 oz a day. My exercise on the other hand is still... Fri, 10 Aug 2012 05:20:39 EST I resisted the sweets! Today hubby and I had to run over to the grocery store after dinner to pick up a couple of things. He ended up getting these cake type things with tons of frosting between 2 round cake goodies (about a 5" diameter, 3" thick) and my daughter wanted a bag of double stuff oreo's. Do you know how hard this was looking at these items in the cart, wanting my very own sweet/goodie item? <BR> <BR> WELL MY SPARKFRIENDS....I did buy something for myself.....a 24 pack of water...yes I totally fough... Wed, 8 Aug 2012 21:15:39 EST Just an update...nothing exciting. So far it is a very quiet day today. My wonderful daughter came over yesterday and we had a fantastic time!! It is so great to spend time with both my daughters, talking and laughing, just enjoying life....I really needed that. <BR> <BR> Checked out the new Sparks feature "SparkCoach", not quite sure if I am sold on it or not, maybe just too early to tell. In case you have not tried it out, it is free for two weeks, a trial period and you get 500 points plus 25 points for everyday you lo... Tue, 7 Aug 2012 12:25:41 EST Doing well after an emotional weekend Since I am an emotional eater this weekend would have normally been a "big bust" on staying within a reasonable calorie range....however I controlled myself and did well. My water intake needs to come up today, only got in around 8 glasses each day over the weekend, normally I will drink 12-16 glasses a day. Picked up a few necessary staples at the grocery store yesterday, I had been out of my whole grain oatmeal which I love to eat for breakfast and my salad dressing for my salad at luncht... Mon, 6 Aug 2012 07:08:49 EST Changed weigh in day and down 4lbs. Well I decided this morning to change my weigh in day to Fridays instead of Monday's, here is my reasoning. Hubby and I usually go out for dinner on Friday's and I usually do not cook quite the way I do on the weekends as I do by Monday I may have weight gain from sodium and some extra calories from weekend (although I will be trying to really watch what I eat from now on). I want nothing to possibly discourage me from continuing this journey, so this change is very necessary ... Fri, 3 Aug 2012 06:30:21 EST Day 4 of restart Well not much too add today. I am still staying on track, eating healthy, drinking alot of water and doing some exercise (although not exactly what I should be doing). My daughter last night made homemade chocolate chip cookies, oh my the smell throughout the house! I did allow myself one cookie (put it in my tracker) and allowed my self one today for lunch (also tracked it). Tonight while hubby is eating his several with milk I will just disappear into the other room so I am not tempted ... Thu, 2 Aug 2012 14:37:50 EST Still going well and a special thank you! Day 3 is going well so far. I have a late start today as hubby didn't have to go into work until 8:30am which now has thrown my eating time all off whack.....however I am back on track, finished breakfast and now off getting ready to clean the house. Yesterday I feel went really well overall with healthy eating, drinking water and even exercise. <BR> <BR> I want to take a moment to thank a very special Sparkfriend/buddy, Susan (PCOH051610) for mentioning me in her blog yesterday and havin... Wed, 1 Aug 2012 09:58:31 EST Staying on track, feeling better already! Yes, well it is only the beginning of the second day of my restart but I am already feeling better mentally and physically. Yesterday I ate mostly fresh vegetables (lettuce, broccoli, cauliflower), basically my fill of all. Feel very confident that I can have a successful day today, eating healthy food and keeping up my water intake. <em>194</em> Exercise really needs to be incorporated, this will really help me with my energy level and tiredness....really going to try and get in at least... Tue, 31 Jul 2012 09:36:14 EST Starting over and kicking to the curb all negativity! I have decided that it is time to restart this wonderful "Sparks" program since I have fallen off the wagon (and was run over several times). I truly do not know why I am having such a difficult time not only getting started but sticking with it....I KNOW FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE that Sparks works!! I get so upset with myself for not having the will power to stay away from sweets and all the bad carbohydrates, they seem to have taken over my body. I feel terrible, have no energy, my face i... Mon, 30 Jul 2012 13:04:04 EST