CHERYLHURT's SparkPeople Blog CHERYLHURT's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Nieces and baby come tonight To celebrate the baby's 2nd birthday and Mum's 90th. What a combination! Sat, 28 May 2016 05:57:37 EST Got through a little "time of trouble" Mum is delighted with the Assisted Living facility, said yesterday "it's so much better than I ever could have imagined!" The last few weeks have been hell but we got through them! Praise God for His guiding hand! Fri, 27 May 2016 08:18:53 EST Woke up terrified...! I'd be all alone if beloved died first, almost wants me to have bad health so I DONT live a long time...alone. We couldnt have children. I have two nieces in California neither of whom are interested in anyone outside their own family. Scary...terrifying. Thu, 26 May 2016 07:06:28 EST Settling in Mum seems to be settling in. She is worried about "when the money runs out" but the CPA said that wont be for 5 years. Nothing we can do but stay on course, pray, and stay calm. Wed, 25 May 2016 07:41:07 EST Mum is safe with lots of help I dont know how people are expected to pay $4000/month for Assisted Living but Mum is blessed to be able to do so...for 5 years anyway. Then what? Then beloved and I will have to run through our savings. Something is terribly wrong when we can't take care of our most vulnerable but we care for people of other countries. I'm still a bit teary but Ambien helped me finally sleep 8 full hours! Tue, 24 May 2016 05:24:31 EST Movers come today To move Mum into Assisted Living. Beloved got safely back last night, praise God! Tonight I can sleep in my own bed after 14 long nights caring for mum. Mon, 23 May 2016 06:28:07 EST Complaining at SP doesn't change anything? I have grumbled about the new page layout, hate it, hate it. Can't be bothered to try and figure out where the heck things are in the midst of struggling with getting Mum moved tomorrow. Nobody at SP is even answering my emails. Sun, 22 May 2016 05:54:29 EST Two more days and nights Until Mum goes into Assisted Living. Sorry, but I am so darn beyond exhausted all I can do is cry. I'm tired, worn out, fed up, and burned out. Night 8 with just a few hours of broken sleep. It is so grossly unfair to leave the care of an elderly parent on the shoulders of ONE child, when I have a sister who isn't interested! Sat, 21 May 2016 06:55:14 EST Take Mum to a doctor appointment today To get the final papers signed so she may go into Assisted Living. Changed her address on-line yesterday. Did you know know the Post Office charges $1.00 to change an address on line? Why isn't it a free service? I hop to go by Mum's place today and get a bunch of hr stuff. Have to grab her cell phone, Life Alert 911 phone which I have never seen, clothes, some food, set. So much to do. Got about 4 hours sleep last night. Fri, 20 May 2016 06:45:14 EST Calcium, vitamin D, and Fosamax have done NOTHING to help my bones! All the money and years wasted taking these three things and now my "bones are like porcelain" thin, extremely brittle, and I'm not making ANY bone cells. What a waste and it's grossly unfair the medical profession and big pharma are pushing this stuff. I have to get an infusion today to try and build new bone cells! Worthless waste of money! Thu, 19 May 2016 08:04:05 EST Balance problems Today my niece from California will stay with Mum while I go meet with PT for balance training. I'm so ill with exhaustion, Mum wakes every few hours to go to the bathroom and instantly I'm hyperalert, then cant fall back to sleep. Finally got her a doctor appointment Friday afternoon to get paperwork filled out and a TB skin test. Then I have to take her ALL THE WAY BACK again on Monday to get the skin test read. Hopefully we can move her in on Monday. My brother-in-law will handle most ... Wed, 18 May 2016 07:08:25 EST Assisted Living? Mum and I looked at a nice place ten minutes from our home but golly, $4000/month? How are people affording this? My niece flew out from California yesterday. After 12 years of beloved and I carrying the load my sister and b-i-l sent my 30 y/o neice to help me for a week until beloved gets back. Last night I had Mum is double diapers plus a towel. This morning she needed to pee so I had to run upstairs, get my niece, and the two of us helped Mum. I think she was horrified at the changes... Tue, 17 May 2016 05:09:21 EST Mum fell at 0240 I heard the crash, came downstairs to find blood everywhere on the floor, sofa, mum. She fell while trying to get to the bathroom. I couldnt get her up, had to run outside and the Lord provided an RN just getting off work who came over, helped me get her up and back to bed. No sleep for me. Our house is not safe for Mum. Mon, 16 May 2016 06:28:02 EST I have to move Mum in with us Not what I wanted, not at all, but she was so sick yesterday we couldn't go to church. She finally turned to me and said, "I want to move back in with you and Brett." So be it. Not what I wanted! I reminded her we have cruises booked in August, October, and March and we will HAVE to bring in someone to care for her. She refuses. Absolutely "wont have a stranger in the house." I have been up since 2am, cant sleep. Today will be full, I have to get neighbors to help me move the upstairs... Sun, 15 May 2016 04:41:18 EST Spent the night at Mums Had to take an ambien since I don't sleep well at her place. Today we will go to church, and then I will head home in the afternoon. Supposed to have a burger at the neighbors this evening. Next week is packed with appointments, but interesting stuff like the bug man, more security cameras going in, one doctor appointment. Beloved will be home in. 9 days! Sat, 14 May 2016 05:17:20 EST Last day of school! Mum, 90 in a few weeks, INSISTS she wants us BOTH to volunteer again next year. Hours of driving, tons of stress. I love the teacher I work for , love the kids, but I have NO CLUE what to come up with for an art project for 10 Commandments for next year since she didn't like ANY of the ideas I got off Pinterest. It's so much easier to just say we wont be back...Mum needs more and more of our help and I am just so burned out. Beloved will be back a week from Monday. Today I have to rememb... Fri, 13 May 2016 06:53:10 EST Teachers work SO hard! I was called to be an RN, and did teach adults in hospital and clinical settings, but I was never called to be an elementary/middle school teacher. These teachers work long hours for little or no appreciation! We have multiple grades in each classroom at our private Christian schoool and for the most part it's wonderful, but I see the kids disrespecting each other, the staff and volunteers, and realize I don't have the patience to teach children. They are expected to be rambunctious, their... Thu, 12 May 2016 06:37:50 EST Headed to school today Taking surface streets...our last day will be Friday! Wed, 11 May 2016 06:08:22 EST Today I will drive to Mum's I plan to drive slowly, prayerfully, and in the far right lane to get to Mum's house today. Then I will spend the day with he, bringing a book and my computer. There is a school board meeting tonight I need to go to so another member will pick me up and take me with her, and back, and then Wednesday Mum and I will drive slowly, carefully, and prayerfully to school, spend the day, drive back to her house. Tomorrow afternoon I will perform the Herculean task of driving from her house back to ... Tue, 10 May 2016 04:43:24 EST Anybody struggling with dizziness? The hardest part is trying to terrifies me. I have nobody near me to drive me to the next city or to any doctor appointments. I'm going to call one appointment today and move it, but that's the only one I can move. Three day of school left over 2 weeks, one board meeting, four doctor appointments...somehow I have to get through. No doctor has been able to help me and I'm terrified. sometimes the dizziness hits when I'm driving and I have to pull off the road and wait it out. Mon, 9 May 2016 07:29:48 EST Don't count on Mum or me for next year! I notified the teachers not to count on Mum or me next year. She is quite shattered over this latest fall and my vertigo makes driving very difficult. I will be doing a lot of driving these two weeks beloved is gone but I have the creep along the back roads and schedule twice as long to get there! Yesterday I had two episodes while driving, where I had to pull off for a while and wait until it passes... Sun, 8 May 2016 06:26:59 EST Beloved is leaving for 2 weeks! He's headed to Florida for 2 weeks. I'll be home alone with Mum to care for. Bummer! I'll try to eat clean and at least make this a healthful experience! Sat, 7 May 2016 06:16:47 EST Cold and windy here In Greenville Winter seemed to come back for a visit. Yesterday was cold, windy, and rained in the afternoon. My left foot hurt from the bad little toe and the whole foot is swollen...I wonder if it's arthritis. Don't know why my body is falling apart so suddenly! We tried to explain to dance class that we will NOT be renewing lessons when this contract runs out, but boy, they are pushy! Always want you enrolled months ahead but I need a break, from doing so much. I REALLY wish Mum would decide not to... Fri, 6 May 2016 04:47:13 EST out walking Got a good walk in this morning. Mum is still sore so we will cancel school volunteering tomorrow too! Thu, 5 May 2016 07:41:19 EST Not volunteering today Just too darn tired. When Mum eventually dies I'm packing in all this volunteering. So busy beloved hasn't been to kung-fu in 6 months, neither of us have been to the gym, we haven't been to a park. Life has been a constant treadmill and I'm worn out. Wed, 4 May 2016 07:15:45 EST Mum fell again! I call her every 2 hours but she never said anything. In the late afternoon when we were at Costco picking up allergy meds I called her again. He voice sounded off so I reassured her she "wouldn't have to ever go in a facility if she didn't want" and then her voice broke...and she told me she had fallen over 8 hours earlier and thought she "was hurt." Beloved and I rushed out of Costco, he flew down the freeway hitting the heavy traffic, and we got to her house in 30 minutes. I assessed h... Tue, 3 May 2016 07:08:40 EST Looked at assisted living facilities yesterday Mum, beloved and I looked at two A-rated private facilities yesterday. Had an OK lunch at one of them...I can't imagine putting Mum there, but if she moves in with us it means our travelling is over until she dies. It's hard balancing a husband and a parent. My sister in California is absolutely no relief, so the burden falls on us. I don't want to warehouse Mum and it was sad to see people who were once strong, active, and productive ending their last days alone. There is nothi... Mon, 2 May 2016 04:34:14 EST My girlfriend's divorce and eating raw She called me last night, an old friend I used to do Bible work with. He husband decided he wanted "to be happy" so walked away from 40 years of marriage and cleaned out the bank account. Now he's living in Malaysia where the girls look young and he gets "all the passion he wants." I didn't know where to begin! I told her how sorry I was...she asked how my raw foods eating was going...pretty well except for the daily binging on samples from Great Harvest Bread store! We talked for well ov... Sun, 1 May 2016 05:52:30 EST First of May tomorrow! And school is almost out...hurrah! I have to start driving again...beloved leaves next week for TWO WEEKS! Ugh! We are almost through with our dance lessons. Not continuing them will free up a whole bunch of time. I have really enjoyed them but they aren't teaching us anything new, just rehashing what we already learned over and over. It seems they just want to run the lessons out until it's time to but another "plan" for mega bucks! Sat, 30 Apr 2016 06:10:31 EST Counting the days until school is over! Beloved drove me this week but next week he leaves to go to Florida for a few weeks so I have to be able to drive myself. I can't wait for school to be over so I can just rest, read, and relax! When Mum can't volunteer anymore then I will pack it up. It takes me 40 minutes to get just over 30 miles but the roads are crooked, traffic heavy, and my syncope on that road has me panicked. I love the kids, though! Fri, 29 Apr 2016 05:28:44 EST Slept in, finally! I was tired to tears yesterday. Mum just says, "why? You haven't done anything!" Health problems, soaring and crashing BP, doctor visits, all are exhausting. Sometimes I wish she weren't around and I instantly banish those thoughts because I know I don't have many more years with her. But she's stress, and I love her. Health problems are exhausting. Oh, to be 40 and healthy again! Thu, 28 Apr 2016 08:51:33 EST Raw foods, day 1 I have to do something so am willing to try this drastic step. For breakfast I had 5 cups baby greens pureed with water and two apricots...not tasty but not awful either. A few hours later I had 24 raw almonds. For lunch I had a huge raw veggie salad and 4 slices of dried apricots for the potassium. For dinner it was 24 more almonds and two pears. I slept pretty well last night! Today I will try to drive myself to school 40 minutes away and pray I don't pass out again! Wed, 27 Apr 2016 05:30:22 EST Has anyone done a raw foods diet? Heard from a dietician friend, very slender, no medical problems whatsoever, that she recommends a raw foods diet to many of her difficult patients...difficult to treat, she means. Has anyone tried it? I'm looking for resources, anything to get my blood pressure and resulting crashes, under control. The medical bills, ambulance bills, and co-pays are astronomical so far these six months. Got to be a better wa,...need to find it. Tue, 26 Apr 2016 04:52:10 EST Cannot drive? How do I volunteer? The doctors tell me I cannot drive until they "get the orthostatic hypotension under control." Cannot tell me how long that may take but my blood pressure is officially "uncontrolled" and I now have to take readings 4X day. How do I volunteer? My Mum "lives for the school" so now what do I do? I can have beloved drive but that's about 200 miles a day for him to take me there, drive home, drive back for me, take Mum home, then drive me home. If I didn't have her I could pack it up... Mon, 25 Apr 2016 18:08:27 EST Another ambulance ride! Today is my birthday, 63, and I am back in the hospital AGAIN! I was driving to volunteer at school yesterday and half way started to feel light head , like I was going to pass out. I pulled into some guy's yard, waited a while, and drove some more. I made it to a laundry shop, pulled in, knew my blood pressure was crashing so attempted to walk and do some push-ups on my car. Just wanted to get to school! Drove some more, had to pull into a parking lot of a medical office building where I... Sat, 23 Apr 2016 03:35:30 EST Finally Friday School today...beloved is going to ride the hills and he deserves the break. He spent yesterday meeting the TV guy to fix Mum's 3ABN satellite, lowered her bed so she can get in and out, then was working at the school. I met with the allergist and have loads of skin testing May 2, should have had it done yesterday but the Ambien my physician prescribed interfered with testing. Mum is really slowing's so sad. Fri, 22 Apr 2016 05:02:38 EST Back on the treadmill of life, at full speed! Beloved drove straight back. The next day we were at Mums' with groceries, new phones, new lamps...all had "died" while we were away. The next day beloved and I were at her house building a ramp from the garage into the house since she can no longer walk the two steps up into the house. The NEXT day, yesterday, she and I volunteered all day at school and one of the teachers told me Mum had FALLEN again while we were gone...Mum never mentioned it. What do I do? We pray about it every day! ... Thu, 21 Apr 2016 04:44:15 EST Anybody gotten rid of a nasty corn? It's these dancing shoes...they rub my left little toe and now I have such a bad corn I cant wear any shoes but flip flops! My beloved carefully cut the top off with a new scalpel blade, the podiatrist cut out a piece, and now I'm waiting to have "cortisone shots" into the toe. I'm wearing the corn pads, little silicone dance sleeve thingys for toes, open shoes, etc but darn, it hurts! Anybody gotten rid of one? Tue, 19 Apr 2016 06:47:00 EST Home again See the doctor in two weeks so will be very careful, no wine, lots of fresh raw ...time to pay the piper! Mon, 18 Apr 2016 06:44:51 EST Heading home! Yeah! Heading home today! It's a ten hour drive but I'm glad we're back! Sun, 17 Apr 2016 06:26:32 EST Brutally hot We walked into Cozumel yesterday and the heat came on hard and fast. After an hour I was ill, we had to get a taxi the rest of the way. Beloved got his haircut from the barber he uses, then we walked in the coolness of the shops before heading back to the ship, again by taxi. After a long, cool spring the heat came on too hot and too suddenly! Sat, 16 Apr 2016 08:30:31 EST Another week and my dress won't zip! Good thing we head home Sunday. Today we walked three hours into town, around, and back to the ship. Getting the exercise in. Fri, 15 Apr 2016 08:24:03 EST Going to Hell The site in Grand Cayman that's a dying coral reef. All dark instead of pink, people painted Red Devils all over the post office where you can pay a few dollars and get your passport stamped, "Hell, Grand Cayman." It's fun to do the first time...we will skip all that and just get more walking in. Almost two weeks and we are both ready to get off... Thu, 14 Apr 2016 06:34:39 EST Burned my feet Somehow got my feet sunburned...and my knee caps. Only a few days left before we hit the US on Sunday. Then will have to really go vegan with NO wine for a month to prepare for labs...this darn fatty liver! Wed, 13 Apr 2016 14:57:16 EST Gone swimming Got in an early ocean swim, fabulous! In the rain. So much for Caribbean sunshine... Tue, 12 Apr 2016 06:52:20 EST Got our walking in Early morning and again early afternoon walks are so peaceful. Saw a whale off the side of the ship, unusual for this time of year in the Caribbean. Love the sound of the sea. Calm, stress-free week ahead. Have a blessed day, spark friends! Mon, 11 Apr 2016 11:12:00 EST Mum refuses to go into assisted living And she doesn't want to live with us either! I spent the day trying to call her...she can't open her cell phone...leaves the phone off the hook...what do you do with an aged parent? I want he to be safe and happy...but it's killing me! Sun, 10 Apr 2016 21:05:27 EST Mum refuses to go into assisted living And she doesn't want to live with us either! I spent the day trying to call her...she can't open her cell phone...leaves the phone off the hook...what do you do with an aged parent? I want he to be safe and happy...but it's killing me! Sun, 10 Apr 2016 21:05:26 EST Slept so well The roar of the sea, gentle rocking of the ship, no kitty making mad, passionate love to my face at 1am...slept better than I can long remember. Sat, 9 Apr 2016 08:12:49 EST Medical emergencies put it all into perspective Unplanned stop in Turks and Caicos to drop off not one, but TWO medical emergencies. The ship sent off another medical emergency two days ago in St. Thomas. That's three people too ill to stay on board. Makes my stresses pale in comparison. Early bed tonight to be rocked asleep by the waves and roar of the sea. I am blessed. Fri, 8 Apr 2016 21:18:49 EST