CAREN_BLUEJEANS's SparkPeople Blog CAREN_BLUEJEANS's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Weight fluctuating wildly Dear friends I know it looks like I'm losing so much weight a pound this day another pound in two more days another two pounds two more days after that. But what you're not seeing is that my weight is fluctuating up and down. By 2 or 3 lb or 1 pound a day. But overall I'm down 20 lbs from the first of the year. Win! Thu, 12 Apr 2018 18:38:20 EST Did I really lose 2.6 lbs on my birthday week? I've lost 15 pounds in the last 8 weeks, including losing 2.6 lbs on my birthday week. I can't believe it! Seriously, I ate out & splurged. Sure, I planned for it, counted all my calories honestly, and when it came time to bring treats to the office, I made meringue cookies, 15 calories each. Recipe <link><BR>vanilla-meringue-cookies </link> I expected to lose something. Maybe a pound. I was blown away how fast this is going. <BR> <BR> So I'm going hom... Sat, 11 Nov 2017 15:08:28 EST Tracking WL 9/16/17 209 <BR> 9/23/17 204.8 <BR> 9/30/17 204 <BR> 10/7/17 202 <BR> 10/14/17 201 <BR> 10/20/17 199 <BR> 10/28/17 198 <BR> <BR> Total loss 11 lbs in 6 weeks. I"m really happy with my progress. I'm tracking with MyFitnessPal (MFP) instead of Sparkpeople. There's not so many ads & distractions. Just a more straight forward tracker. But, it's linked to my fitbit, which is linked to SP, so my weight in are showing up. <BR> <BR> My fist goal was getting under 200. My next goal is 188, which re... Sat, 28 Oct 2017 11:14:07 EST Happy New Year 2017 I'm feeling so good, happy, and hopeful. I even got on my stationary bike, did 30 min, then pt, then upper body weights. I even tracked breakfast & lunch. <BR> <BR> My new job hasn't started yet. My freelance has picked up, but I haven't gotten a check yet. But just the anticipation of getting money, so that I can be self sufficient, has lifted my depression. <BR> <BR> I had 2 design job offers to choose from, one was an hour away, and I just couldn't face 10 hours a week in the car. The o... Tue, 3 Jan 2017 16:14:01 EST Joy is gone <img src=""> <BR> This is my sweet cat, Joy. Joy grew very ill, lost weight, was panting, pupils fixed, crying in pain (like I've never heard before) and we decided to end his pain a few days ago. The vet & assistant were very kind, and made a hard day a little better. My son & I were with Joy until the end, and he was purring. Yet I still feel guilty. Could I have done more. The vet said this feeling is natural. I... Fri, 9 Dec 2016 14:36:52 EST Blog update 1. I got a job. I start January 6. It's close by. It's part time, 29 hours, so they can avoid paying benefits. But it could expand to have benefits next fall. Also, I continue to do freelance work. <BR> <BR> 2. My depression has lifted (see #1). <BR> <BR> 3. My left knee is whacked. My orthopedic surgeon says arthritis has brought the knee bones closer together. I was on crutches (and serious painkillers) for a week. I got a shot of cortisone, and I'm walking again. Well, limping. <BR> <B... Wed, 30 Nov 2016 12:11:41 EST It's been ages since I blogged- Update question Hi Sparkfriends! It's been ages since I blogged about my weight loss journey. I'm not sure where to start updating. <BR> <BR> 1. I could look back at where I was, physically, mentally, and step-by-step from there <BR> <BR> 2. Just jump in where I am at the moment in time, reflect back a little, look forward a little. <BR> <BR> 3. Maintain social media silence, because it's overwhelming to catch up <BR> <BR> 4. Blog like I clean a room: start at the door and work my way around clock-wise... Wed, 30 Nov 2016 11:59:19 EST I had a job interview! I've been super busy with my freelance business. I did 7 signs and as I was working on them, my client asked me if I did the banner for this conference last year, and if so, could I update it. I said yes, with pleasure. And when that was done, the client asked if I could do a 2nd banner. This is how it goes in the freelance business. Feast or famine. <BR> <BR> An opportunity arose to apply for a full-time job with benefits at the University (which laid me off a year ago). It is in the Equal... Fri, 16 Sep 2016 10:09:51 EST Hamilton Workout It's raining so I'm not going for a walk. I'll just do a Hamilton Workout dance video, then leg workout & abs. I did a bunch of freelance work yesterday, so I'm sending out invoices today. <BR> For next week's interview, I'm studying title IX, and discrimination, and how to make a great power point presentation. I'm not throwing my shot. <BR> <BR> <link> </link> Thu, 8 Sep 2016 10:18:08 EST Upper body & crunches I took a 30 minute walk today, then did upper body workout & 75 crunches. Back in the day, I did the Abs of Steel video workouts, and they said you can work your abs every day. Has anyone else heard this? I learned to alternate upper body & leg days to give muscles a rest. I do abs daily, but different ab exercises, like crunches, planks, toe touches, seated twists, so I think it hits different sets of core muscles. <BR> <BR> My freelance work is picking up. And other good news, I have a jo... Wed, 7 Sep 2016 10:34:40 EST Leg & ab day I did legs & abs today. Already I can do more reps & sets. My strength is returning. Also took a 45 min walk. <BR> <BR> Funny story, yesterday, before bed I checked my fitbit, and I was only 200 steps away from my 10,000 step/day goal. So I walked around my bedroom until I got to goal. Anyone else do that? <BR> <BR> I'm driving DS17 back to college today, His friend asked if he can get a ride too. They went to high school & the same college together. I'm glad to carpool, but I hope my son ... Mon, 5 Sep 2016 11:31:05 EST Upper body & planks Like the title says, I did upper body work out & planks today, after my 30 min walk. Let's take a minute to celebrate that I worked out 3 days in a row. I think my depression is lifted. Sat, 3 Sep 2016 15:09:37 EST Abs & Legs Today I took a 30 minute walk & did abs & legs workout, which was very challenging! I only did 2 reps of abs workout, and only one rep of legs. And I was breathing hard from it. I'm glad I worked out. It's been a long time since I did these exercises, and hopefully, with muscle memory, I'll get back to my previous level sometime soon. Consistency is key. Fri, 2 Sep 2016 10:35:01 EST First of the Month, time to take your measurements Today, I not only took my measurements, I went for a 30 minute walk, and did upper body weight lifting. All thanks to you, my friends, I feel a renewed commitment to getting healthy. Thu, 1 Sep 2016 12:02:28 EST Pokemon Go We went out to board game night at the local store. It was fun. I killed at scrabble. Out the window, we noticed tons of kids walking around looking at their phones. They were all playing Pokemon Go. It seriously increased the foot traffic on the square. Other players at the table told me a bit about it. So, I decided to download & play it. <BR> <BR> Pokemon Go is augmented reality game. It only works if you're walking. As you walk down the street, you encounter Pokemon. Your phone vibrates,... Sun, 17 Jul 2016 11:17:14 EST Back to walking again It's been a week since my bee sting on my big toe, and I can finally wear socks & sneaks comfortably. I went for a short walk, just 30 minutes, because it began to rain. <BR> <BR> My freelance business is slowly coming along. <BR> <BR> Ds17 is getting ready for college. <BR> <BR> I have some mixed feelings about sending a kid to college, when I'm earning so little money. I don't want him to put his life on hold because of me. But I worry about money constantly. <BR> <BR> I had a realto... Thu, 30 Jun 2016 14:40:39 EST Bee Sting I was walking in my back yard in flip flops, picking up sticks that fell from the tree, when I felt a sharp pain in my big toe. I look down & there's a dead bee on my flip flop, and a stinger in my toe. Damn! I took out the stinger & went inside. <BR> <BR> (I later learned that you should not pull straight out, but scoop it out, wash the area with soap & water, apply baking soda to draw out the venom.) <BR> <BR> The toe hurt, but it wasn't until the next day that my whole foot swelled up, a... Thu, 23 Jun 2016 10:43:14 EST Knee update thank you for the well wishing yesterday! I drove 1 hour to the knee doctor yesterday, and found out that my knee dr isn't covered by my new insurance. Another doctor may be, so I'll look around. I'm not getting my 10,000 steps in daily because of knee pain. It's really too bad. <BR> <BR> Have a great weekend! Sat, 11 Jun 2016 11:45:41 EST Knee Dr today I'm taking better care of myself. I went to the eye dr. My astigmatism was so bad, I have double vision. I ordered glasses & sunglasses online. I'm seeing the knee dr today, to get a shot, and Rx. The Rx is for a anti-inflammatory, a Rx strength Aleeve. However the side effect is possible raising blood pressure. Not looking forward to the jab, but I am looking forward to feeling much better. <BR> <BR> With the rise in opiod abuse, punctuated by Princes' accidental overdose, the doctors are ... Fri, 10 Jun 2016 10:42:49 EST Lost & Found I walk 3 miles, every other day: 1.5 miles out, and 1.5 miles back. On my way back today, I found a fitbit on the sidewalk. I felt for must have fallen off. Even though I didn't know it was missing, I was so grateful to find it. And then I had the thought, "All those steps that didn't count! I know I did them, my knees know I did them, but they didn't count on fit bit." <BR> <BR> I am doing well on the Lipitor. I have an eye dr appointment for Tuesday. I've been having double visi... Sat, 4 Jun 2016 11:34:18 EST Lost & Found I walk 3 miles, every other day: 1.5 miles out, and 1.5 miles back. On my way back today, I found a fitbit on the sidewalk. I felt for must have fallen off. Even though I didn't know it was missing, I was so grateful to find it. And then I had the thought, "All those steps that didn't count! I know I did them, my knees know I did them, but they didn't count on fit bit." <BR> <BR> I am doing well on the Lipitor. I have an eye dr appointment for Tuesday. I've been having double visi... Fri, 3 Jun 2016 22:29:36 EST Low cholesterol diet The results of my blood work are in. My cholesterol is a little too high. I was asked if I wanted to start Lipitor & I said yes. He also wants me on a low cholesterol diet. I'm new to the concept, and will have to do my research. But so far I've switched from eggs to egg whites, skipped ice cream, but I had shrimp, which turns out has lots of cholesterol. <BR> <BR> If you have any suggestions for a low cholesterol diet you would like to share, I'd be happy to hear. Fri, 20 May 2016 14:39:20 EST BIL, 50 had a heart attack My brother in law, age 50, had a heart attack on Saturday. I was so surprised, because that's so young. BIL doesn't even eat red meat. But, as is brother pointed out, that was the same age as his father & grandfather had their first heart attacks. <BR> <BR> BIL had 99% blockage, & had a stent put in, and he was released from the hospital today. <BR> <BR> He's got twins who are graduating high school next month. He's a doctor. He's generous, thoughtful, kind. He has so much going for him. S... Tue, 17 May 2016 19:22:26 EST I need to work to feel good At the start of my day, I thought I had one new contract, and working coming in from one existing contract. The first fell through. I'm OK with that, because it wasn't much money. But, when the existing client said the expected files weren't coming today, I need those files before I can start anything. I felt like I was cut adrift. I suddenly had nothing to do all day. <BR> <BR> And worse, I still had bills coming in. <BR> <BR> I started looking for something to eat. I had a banana. OK, t... Wed, 4 May 2016 15:41:38 EST Pinch Punch, First of the Month I used to have a habit of taking my measurements on the first of every month. Going through my period of ennui, I let that slide. Today, was my day of reckoning. I measured bicepts, waist, hips & thigh. I opened the tracker on SparkPeople, and saw that my last measurements were January 2015. Nearly a year & a half ago. The time that I really gave up, was about a year ago, in June, when I found out I was going to be laid off at the end of August. But I had a clue that finances were bad at the ... Mon, 2 May 2016 12:08:56 EST Walking When I go for a walk, I usually bring my iPod to listen to something. I walk the same route, about an hour. I walk 3 mph, which is slow. It's not a cardio workout. I call it functional movement. It builds up endurance, so that if I'm ever on vacation, doing a walking tour or whatever, I can keep up just fine. When I"m walking I try not to let my behind just jiggle behind me, but engage my glutes and let them propel me along. <BR> <BR> My weight loss efforts are doing well. I've stopped gain... Wed, 27 Apr 2016 11:27:59 EST Why am I doing this? I was having dinner. A full serving of dinner, even though I had a binge in the afternoon, when no one else was around. Sneak eating is my shameful secret. I ate dinner, and I was stuffed. Even though I wanted to lose weight, I still was binge eating, stuffing myself, feeling shame. I was acting in the opposite of my intention. I asked myself "Why am I doing this?" THAT WAS MY MOMENT. <BR> <BR> I started by eating better. Incrementally better: no bread at breakfast, no rice or pasta, I even ... Fri, 22 Apr 2016 08:53:26 EST My struggle I've had my ups & downs. Successes & losses. I struggle with my weight & binge eating. My weight is OVER 200 again, close to my all time highest weight. I feel uncomfortable bending & stretching with the added midsection. I found myself binging 2 days ago, and asked myself "What are you doing?" I tried to tell myself a list of excuses: <BR> <BR> 1. Stuffing down food stuffs down the negative emotions <BR> No - that's temporary relief, at best <BR> <BR> 2. Binge eating is respectable, compar... Thu, 21 Apr 2016 10:35:07 EST Good Morning I managed (barely) to stay withing my calorie range yesterday. That's all I'm asking of myself. OK, and maybe exercise 30 a day. Thu, 25 Feb 2016 06:51:08 EST High Blood Pressure A lot of people have high blood pressure. And now I have it too. I'm starting mild meds tomorrow. I hope this is the wake up call I need to get back to my awesome habits. I found a dance workout on my 'on demand' cable and did 30 workout. I'm out of cardio shape. I hope I can quickly improve my cardio condition. <BR> <BR> My weight is up. My mood is down. I don't like being on HBP meds. I don't like my job. I don't like Illinois. I don't like what's going on in the primaries. <BR> <BR> OK... Tue, 23 Feb 2016 18:50:57 EST Perfectionist Boss I lost a pound this week! I've been trying to be more mindful of eating. I leave just 2 forkfuls of food on my plate (when I remember). It's not enough to make a big difference. But it gives me a chance to think about my level of satiety. If I'm full enough, I don't ever get seconds. But if I'm still hungry after sitting with a few forkfuls on my plate, I eat them, and maybe get some veggies or water to fill up on. After dinner time is a historically big binge eating time, for me. Another pro... Sat, 23 Jan 2016 13:36:14 EST Happy New Year! <img src=""> <BR> <BR> That's me in the upper left, feeling the Burn! <BR> Bernie Sanders holds a town hall event at Keokuk Middle School in Keokuk, Iowa <BR> <BR> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ <BR> New Year is a good enough place to start a new regime. I recently listened to a podcast, Dishing Up Nutrition, and they said that excess sugar is linked to joint pain. It may cause inflammation, as well as a host of other woes lik... Wed, 6 Jan 2016 22:03:54 EST Good enough Soon I start my new job. I look forward to having a gang to hang out with every day. It's not a creative position, but it's good enough. <BR> <BR> I've been out of work for 3.5 months, a semester. The kids have been so supportive. There were days when I felt like just holding it together was a chore. I'm proud of myself for not giving into the dreadful feelings. <BR> <BR> I had 2 job offers to choose from! Then, after choosing the better paying job, I got a call to interview for a 3rd, whi... Tue, 15 Dec 2015 15:44:14 EST Job interview I have another job interview set up for Monday. Friends tell me it's a nice place to work. And the pay is better than the offer I have in hand. Fingers crossed. <BR> <BR> I can't believe Hannukah is starting tomorrow night! I'm so not ready for this. I told that kids, with me not working, don't expect a present every night. <BR> <BR> Well, I'm off to the gym to do 30 min on the elliptical. Sat, 5 Dec 2015 10:17:56 EST Got a new job! Today's interview went very well. I got the job. I start on Tuesday. Not really good pay. But it's better than what I'm making now, which is nothing Thu, 3 Dec 2015 19:20:35 EST Back to gym I got a one month free membership to the gym. Went there today, did elliptical and upper body. I feel really good! I have this idea, let me run it by you. My idea is not to have a drink until I find a job. It might be what I need to get my head straight. Mon, 30 Nov 2015 10:09:53 EST Weigh in Weigh in day> stayed the same. this week my challenge is to cut out junk food. My diet has plenty of room for improvement! I turn to junk food when I'm really hungry & haven't planned ahead. My game plan: Meal planning, eating small healthy snacks, and filling up on veggies (lots of fiber). I want to keep myself from the circumstances that lend them selves to giving in to temptation. <BR> <BR> Halloween is coming. I'm not buying candy to give away. Because DS17 & I will be away for a marchi... Sat, 24 Oct 2015 09:46:38 EST Oprah and Leelo Billionaire, Oprah Winfrey just bought 10% of Weight Watchers shares. Oprah's has had her weight loss struggles, up and down the scale. I recently saw her on the news and I wondered, "If the richest woman in the world, with the resources to hire all the support people (nutritionists, doctors, chefs, personal trainers, coaches) can't lose all the weight she wants to lose, what does it say about me?" <BR> <BR> Also, WW makes it's money on repeat clients. They have a 5% success rate...and that... Thu, 22 Oct 2015 11:03:25 EST Up 3 pounds <img src=""> I put on 20 pounds in the last 3 months. This isn't good or healthy. There's a part of me that's find the chips in the cookies and the cheese quote for the kids on quote. But it's my self sabotage. I try to stay positive here in this blog. But it's just a mask over my pain and anxiety and anger. The truth of it is as obvious as the weight that I've gained. Sat, 10 Oct 2015 07:44:27 EST Tuesday Goals I went for a bike ride this morning, went the whole 3 miles, my usual walking route, and it was a great cardio workout. The knee feels great. I'm really glad I did it, although, now I probably won't get my 10,000 steps. It's a trade off. <BR> <BR> Tuesday Goals: <BR> 1. track food <em>180</em> <BR> 2. Bike (done) <em>332</em> <BR> 3. drink plenty of water <em>194</em> Tue, 6 Oct 2015 10:51:33 EST Monday Goals Monday Goals: <BR> 1. track food <em>190</em> <BR> 2. exercise <em>311</em> <BR> 3. drink 8 glasses of water <em>274</em> Mon, 5 Oct 2015 08:34:48 EST Sunday Goals I'm doing really well in comp sci class. I went to see the professor last week to ask a question that I didn't want to ask in class because it was off topic. Now, if you're a college student, (or tell your college kids) go & visit the prof during office hours. You will do better in college if you know your professors. Also, read ahead in the text books. And speak up to questions in lectures. Even if you're wrong, your answer will let the prof know that this is an area that needs to be gone ov... Sun, 4 Oct 2015 08:28:25 EST Friday Goals Friday Goals: <BR> 1. try to stay positive, think of all I have to be grateful for <BR> 2. walk or bike <BR> 3. kitchen closed between meals/snacks <BR> 4. measure those starchy carbs <BR> <BR> Well, it's October. I've been out of work for a month, and no news. My car needs work. so that's bad. I now have health care. so that's good. Fri, 2 Oct 2015 10:16:45 EST Wednesday Goals I measured a cup of mashed potatoes for dinner. I like to mix my cooked spinach with my mash. DS16 doesn't. I told him he should try it. And he called me (jokingly) a fascist. I told him I was a mashist. LOL. Anyway, my point is that I'm measuring my carbs 3 days in a row. Which is really, really good for me. <BR> <BR> the other thing I'm doing well, is mentally closing the kitchen between meals & snacks. I was especially bored yesterday, and was thinking about eating numerous times througho... Wed, 30 Sep 2015 09:57:04 EST Tuesday Goals It really helped me to focus on measuring starchy carbs. So I'm going to repeat that today. <BR> <BR> Also today, as I was driving my kids to college (DS28's car is in the shop again) and HS, I noticed that the weather was threatening rain, and that might interfere with my daily 1 hr walk. Then I had a thought, I would bike today for a change. I'm going to follow the same route. Should take a third of the time, so I'll miss the rain. And if the rain comes sooner, I can turn around & quickly ... Tue, 29 Sep 2015 09:23:11 EST Monday Goals Bringing up teens, I tried to give something positive 2 out of 3 times. Like instead of nagging to clean the room 1st thing, tell him I noticed good grades, thank them for helping with the kitchen, then ask them to spend just 15 min cleaning up. When you're nice, kids want to do more for you. <BR> <BR> So, what does this have to do with weight loss? It's about how to treat yourself nicer. Don't beat yourself for a slip up 1st thing, notice at least 2 good things you did, then gently ask you... Mon, 28 Sep 2015 09:19:11 EST saturday Weight stayed the same. I am very grateful. I'm going to make a master list of all my good habits, and focus like a laser beam! <BR> <BR> Walk at least 30 min <BR> Strength train <BR> Water with meals/snacks <BR> Snacks 100-200 cal <BR> Kitchen closed between meals/snacks <BR> Measure starchy carbs <BR> Write it before I bite it Sat, 26 Sep 2015 21:52:19 EST Sunday Goals I lost a pound! That means my daily goals are working in my favor. <BR> <BR> Sunday Goals: <BR> 1. walk an hour (done) <BR> 2. kitchen closed between meals/snacks <BR> 3. snacks are 100-200 cal <BR> 4. try to stay positive <BR> 5. write it before I bite it <BR> 6. drink plenty of water <BR> <BR> DS16 & I went to the first marching band competition of the season. It was a long day 10-10. I did a lot of walking: 13,000 steps, lots of stadium stairs. Stadium food is not healthy, but picked th... Sun, 20 Sep 2015 14:54:57 EST Thursday Goals Thursday Goals: <BR> 1. walk an hour (done) <BR> 2. strength train (done) <BR> 3. write it before I bite it <BR> <BR> My hour long walks are getting easier. Maybe because I stop so much. Today I pet 3 dogs and a cat! <BR> <BR> I miss work. I miss my friends. I stay in touch. The other graphic designer who got laid off met me at the dog park Tuesday. My friend, J, took my DS16's senior pix yesterday. And today I'm meeting my former boss for lunch. J told me no one's moved into my office. My... Thu, 17 Sep 2015 10:22:46 EST Tuesday Goals Tuesday Goals <BR> 1. write it before I bite it <BR> 2. stay positive <BR> 3 strength train <BR> 4. kitchen closed between meals & snacks <BR> <BR> So many times I finish a meal or snack & think "What else can I eat?" It's not hunger, but a desire to eat. I have to tell myself "The kitchen is closed!" Being home all day, unemployed, it's too easy to graze from the pantry & fridge all day. I need to add structure to my day. <BR> <BR> One thing I'm doing is working on my math skills with Kha... Tue, 15 Sep 2015 08:34:53 EST