CABLUESDIVA's SparkPeople Blog CABLUESDIVA's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Putting Energy in Other Spots or Avoidance? Life gets busy, and I'm in the mix right now for being overly busy. I can safely say at this point in my life, I am incapable of doing all that needs to be done! There were times in my life where I certainly could have or would have been able to power through and I am realizing - I am older now. I do not have the 18-hour stamina of my 30-something or 40-something days. I can DO them, and the consequence is larger. <BR> <BR> For example, last Friday I awoke at 6 am (after a night of bad s... Tue, 17 Apr 2012 09:54:44 EST The Prison Of Your Mind <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Saw this on a friend's Facebook page, and I'm sharing! Fri, 6 Apr 2012 09:46:12 EST Consequences In 2003 I had gastric bypass surgery, no regrets. It saved my life. I lost 188 pounds and have been up and down the scale since. <BR> <BR> There are symptoms of surgery, or rather, the result of the surgery that occasionally rear their head, and mine is rearing in the past days. Occasionally, a side-effect is getting food stuck. Where is it stuck? I don't know - but sometimes I'll get something down in my gullet, and it will cause severe heartburn, burping, discomfort for 1-2 days. Ye... Wed, 4 Apr 2012 17:30:38 EST Sometimes it just HITS you I'm on a mini-vacation in Carlsbad, CA which is about 500 miles from my home in Northern CA with my two elderly parents (Dad - 85, Mom - 88). They have been married 60 years (2011). <BR> <BR> Yesterday my dad wasn't feeling all that good, so we tried to make him comfortable. Tried to get him a pill, or food, or something to make him feel better. My mother kept thinking there was something wrong with him - as if he had a stroke or something on the plan. <BR> <BR> My mother said "its t... Sat, 31 Mar 2012 10:10:11 EST Traveling There's an old Leah Kunkel song (I think) that has beautiful lyrics about traveling. "Traveling at night, the headlights were bright. And we'd been up many an hour. And all through my brain, came the refrain; of home and its warming fire. <BR> <BR> ....And home sings me of sweet things. My life there has its own dreams...." <BR> <BR> No, I didn't go home to Nebraska. But I am WITH my family from Nebraska here in Carlsbad. My parents flew out last week. God bless them, they are 85 and... Thu, 29 Mar 2012 10:23:01 EST Delay of Boot Camp but the Beach is Coming! Why? This week is hectic and unusual. I'm driving 500 miles on Wednesday and the following Monday. I will be so far away from my routine my head was spinning. And then, a special Spark friend is analyzing my intake and working on this with me. She convinced me to work on the intake first. In the meanwhile, I'll keep my regular exercise for a while. Boot Camp - is something you can start any day according to the leader. <BR> <BR> In the meanwhile, I am having visions of me walking/ru... Tue, 27 Mar 2012 09:02:45 EST Boot Camp Begins Tomorrow My body is being silently resistant to the new beginning. My joints are aching today (just finished an 18-hour long rain storm) and I'm looking forward to the sun & less ache. <BR> <BR> As I sat quietly this morning and read through emails, Facebook, and finally reading the news (I admit, I am a news junkie) I realized... no input from the instructor. I emailed her, sure enough she will "email us later" with "information on what to bring." <BR> <BR> Yikes, she is giving me no time to run ... Sun, 25 Mar 2012 12:39:51 EST Finding Coping Skills for Weight Loss Nothing says "trigger" like family at times, at least for difficult situations. I am anticipating struggle on some level coming next week, and I am aware or anticipating some interesting conversations. <BR> <BR> After beginning green smoothies in January, continuing an exercise program already in place I hoped I would lose a little weight. Not really. I began to keep track here on Spark. <BR> <BR> February - still not losing weight much. Not getting into December's jeans. Still exercis... Fri, 23 Mar 2012 13:45:21 EST That blob of leftover skin... Those of us who have experienced large weight loss know skin blobs. In my case, I have a lot of them. The one that really bothered me this morning is the grouping of skin on my backside, from waist to the top of my butt crack. <BR> <BR> Picture me, laying on the floor with my band and trying to do my body sculpting exercise on my back. I was trying to get settled into the floor enough so that I could actually DO the exercise with the DVD. <BR> <BR> (Please know - you can laugh). <BR>... Tue, 20 Mar 2012 14:42:40 EST Group Exercise vs. Lone Wolf It was one of those mornings. The alarm goes off and I'm wanting just five more. Of course, as my pattern continues I am waking up long before the alarm actually sounds. <BR> <BR> One week from today I will begin Boot Camp. Am I excited, yes? Nervous, yes. <BR> <BR> There are friends who are saying how nice it will be because I'll be in the group and we're all in it together. If we all "have" to work out, then doing it in a group is more fun. At least, that's what they are telling m... Mon, 19 Mar 2012 15:42:15 EST The Green Day Begins With a Green Smoothie! The day began with a Green Smoothie, the perfect way to start a day. Truthfully, the day began with me being very sad I was waking up but that’s a longer story. I will tell that later. The first food of my day, did begin with the smoothie and I’m happy about that. <BR> <BR> I feel strongly that when I make that very first good choice of the day, the rest of the day seems to go just better. Even if I stuck something in my mouth the day before that isn’t a great idea (sugar, wheat, etc) th... Sat, 17 Mar 2012 12:59:08 EST The Snooze Button & One Leg at a Time The tail end of my weekend, the time change and a couple of diet sodas caused some upset in my world this morning. The alarm went off, with too little sleep before it and I fought back. First - the snooze (nine minutes). Then the second alarm. I snoozed again and fortunately embarked upon a really bad hot flash. <BR> <BR> Within a minute my chest is covered in sweat. I throw the covers off. I forget that I turn off the heat at night. It is a frigid 59 degrees in the house. Covers ba... Mon, 12 Mar 2012 13:18:38 EST Two HUGE Commitments to my Life Change in the past two days! While I have been tracking my food, reading blogs and lurking here the past 4 days, I haven't been blogging. Things feel like wheels are turning, cogs are moving into place and now the machine is becoming connected. So many things to share and I am nervous! I love change :) <BR> <BR> Dang, there is something to the belief that what we eat helps us move into other healthy lifestyle issues. Then it propels us forward because we either think more clearly and move in positive directions, OR ... Sat, 10 Mar 2012 11:55:25 EST Girls Night Out First let me say I am blessed with an interesting group of friends to hang out with. Last night I hung out with my artist friends. Four musicians and one artist (who coincidentally books music at a very well-loved music venue). <BR> <BR> Our GNO (Girls Night Out) has been going on for a few years now. It has evolved to this format: <BR> <BR> 1. Each member rotates at their home. <BR> <BR> 2. The home team prepares the main course <BR> <BR> 3. The GNO participants bring the booze &... Tue, 6 Mar 2012 13:33:01 EST Busy and Staying the Course! Life is more amazing when you manage to stay the course. Staying the course propels me (maybe not you) into making MORE good decisions and sticking more with the course. <BR> <BR> Staying the course means literally to pursue a goal regardless of obstacles or criticism. Apparently the phrase became common with the Presidents Bush. <BR> <BR> With ME it means that I'm learning how to go out, have fun, eat to be full and be social. I ate Mexican last night. Yes, I ate the cheese on my sal... Sat, 3 Mar 2012 12:58:39 EST The Night Before the Weigh-In Tympani's pounding out the Theme from Zarathrustra! Horns come in...."ta.......ta.......ta.......ta da...... pound pound pound pound... yadda yadda." <BR> <BR> Oh yeah - listen to this: <BR> <BR> <link> </link> <BR> <BR> Yeah (she said dryly), that's what it kinda feels like. <BR> <BR> I did announce to DH - "tomorrow I am weighing." He said "good to know." <BR> <BR> Best part, he wants to be there with me when I do it. Bless him. <BR> <BR> I g... Thu, 1 Mar 2012 01:09:52 EST Cannot sleep... but that isn't on my mind... its complicated! I suspect my lack of z's is directly attributed to the noise outside my window. Apparently there is a clogged gutter & its raining. The water noise and splashing noise is LOUD. <BR> <BR> Part of why it is loud? I live in California. Out here, they don't have thick walls and glass (like they do in climates where it actually snows). I woke up around 2:30 to hear this noise, and haven't slept much since. It is now 5:22 am. <BR> <BR> At this point I'm laying here starving. I was hung... Wed, 29 Feb 2012 08:33:42 EST Beginning Day 2 Made it through my day yesterday without a problem. I had a bad weekend - no smoothies and no exercise with dairy and wheat. So yesterday - first day off - I feel stopped up! <BR> <BR> No problems last night. I had a moment of hunger, I threw in a little food (handful of raw almonds) and the moment was over. Then I ate the meal and it was good! I made a new "salad" that I served warm & hearty - Quinoa with Roasted Sweet Potatoes. Yummy! Great spices and my first adventure with quinoa... Tue, 28 Feb 2012 12:43:56 EST Blogging Food Even When It Looks BAD!!! The train wreck is yesterday and although it looks bad, it is not horrible. However, it is not looking good. Certainly nothing to be proud of, and I'm almost positive I can hear my intestines groaning. <BR> <BR> I am sluggish. <BR> <BR> OK, that was yesterday. <BR> <BR> We are changing the path greatly tomorrow so we had a little send-off party. Problem is, my spouse goes sideways with me! It could have been much, much worse and could have been much, much better! <BR> <BR> So today, I... Sun, 26 Feb 2012 10:33:14 EST Two Month Summary and an intro regarding: I Heart Chef Meg Chef Meg's Tip of the Day <BR> <BR> No need to ban bacon. Just a few slices will carry that salty, smoky flavor throughout the entire dish. <BR> <BR> You can take the girl out of Nebraska but you cannot take the Nebraska out of the girl. I heart bacon. I heart the flavor of pork. <BR> <BR> So far, this most raw day has given me a great deal of energy. Yesterday I ate less raw and I felt more sluggish. LIGHT BULB. <BR> <BR> List of positive changes in a more raw diet: <BR> <BR> 1. ... Sat, 25 Feb 2012 11:22:38 EST Daily - 22 days - no scale I am preparing myself that I haven't lost as much as I'd like to have lost. I am trying desperately to not get into MF mentality. (MF - former rapid weight loss program). I loved how quickly I lost. In so many ways I keep thinking to myself - if I had been on that the past two months I'd be nearly done. <BR> <BR> I know I have "gained" many things. I am eating better, easily and without too much of an inner-debate. I am exercising regularly. I am having green smoothies daily. I am ... Wed, 22 Feb 2012 09:49:23 EST Too busy to blog... but tracking is first! First of all, I have an iPhone and the Spark app. There is no reason I cannot enter what I am shoving in my pie hole. Secondly, I am writing down literally everything going in my pie hole. <BR> <BR> Tonight, an almost raw day, then Sweet Tomato. Land of good food and frankly, I ate too much. It was really yummy. The dairy - yikes. I know - my choice but I'm very gassy tonight. <BR> <BR> Sleep is calling my name. Fri, 17 Feb 2012 01:03:28 EST Sharing the love of the Green Smoothie The reaction is usually the same - people look at what you're drinking and say "ick!" Truth is, that was me in 2005. I'm sure in Nebraska there were green smoothie type ready to drink health drinks. They were not at the forefront of my awareness living in the beef state, but they are here in California. <BR> <BR> Saturday night, in the green room where the musicians were hanging out, I was done with my set & talking to others getting ready for theirs. I shared my smoothie with three peo... Mon, 13 Feb 2012 09:52:52 EST Something Sparky! Yes Mary! I wore something Sparky! <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Way over on the left you'll see Charise of Ricky Earl & Charise. Ricky played with Albert King for heaven's sake! They are amazing performers. The last group up was Candye Kane - whom I've followed personally for a minimum of 20 years. Ouch, I'm getting old. Two years ago she hired a new bass player & my good friend Kennan now plays with her about 250 gigs per yea... Sun, 12 Feb 2012 12:20:53 EST Planning Ahead <img src=""> <BR> <BR> This version of the poster for tonight's event has me on it. That's me, white shirt with sunglasses. Yup. The others were centered more on the main performer - Candye Kane. <BR> <BR> This morning I got up and made two batches of green smoothies. One I'm having now. The other I'm packing to take along with me to the show. I have to be there at 3 pm, showtime at 7 pm. I'll be there all day and back stage wi... Sat, 11 Feb 2012 11:37:57 EST Grateful For The Break. (Musician Lapse in Judgement). 24 hours ago I was booked to play a gig in a city I kind-of hate with my dear friend. He books gigs, then picks up musicians without gigs on those nights. In essence, throwing us together sometimes and meeting new folks. Which, by the way is FUN and can bring in more work eventually. <BR> <BR> That said, the gig cancelled and I am one relieved woman because my other music ventures are warm. Wait, isn't this about me and my lifestyle change? <BR> <BR> OK, deal - I have HUGE gig tomorrow,... Fri, 10 Feb 2012 22:33:09 EST Resetting the body My approach to my new lifestyle is guided by a Certified Nutritionist who wrote a book. She makes smoothies for the stars... (I'm laughing) she must be OK. <BR> <BR> Bottom line, she is top of the shelf stuff. She is not all raw, but dang near. <BR> <BR> I'm "doing" her recommended program, almost all the way but as always, I'm not perfect. Last night was the first dairy I'd had in a while and right after eating it I noted my allergies up. More mucus, more snot (sorry) while walking a... Fri, 10 Feb 2012 10:05:42 EST Ha ha ha, I laugh at you! If only I could remember the cartoon or the particular "thing" that gives me this phrase. One must say this phrase with a fake French accent, with a look of indignation and a sharp twist of the head. <BR> <BR> So scale... <BR> <BR> "Haha, I laugh at you!" <BR> <BR> Seriously - people don't weigh themselves. People don't count calories or think in terms of... am I eating enough (oh yeah, there are those people too). <BR> <BR> It isn't consuming me, but by entering every thing I eat her... Thu, 9 Feb 2012 00:27:32 EST Nearly Perfect Why nearly? Because I forgot to eat my probiotic enzyme salad. Stay with me here. It is part of the healthy lifestyle change (I un-typed the word program) I am adopting. It helps a person digest easier and therefore, less sludge in the body. Long story, interesting and makes sense kind of stuff. <BR> <BR> I took my Mag O7, so hopefully I don't blow out anywhere around the house tomorrow. It is supposed to be gentle, and I know people who take five overnight. I'm thinking, no - we'll e... Wed, 8 Feb 2012 00:19:00 EST The Gray The Drive-In movie is close to our home and that is one of our beloved date night spots. We bring our own food, blankets (gets chilly in the car) and pillows. Last night we saw "The Gray" and I spent most of the violent scenes holding the blanket up so I didn't have to see anything gory. It was realistic. <BR> <BR> Just watched a documentary - National Geographic's "Stress - Portrait of a Killer." If you have Netflix - it is available there. I highly recommend this and gives a lot of ... Sun, 5 Feb 2012 12:32:53 EST Saturday mornings... and my dream last night The moment: Jammies, coffee, quiet house and all I hear is the clock ticking and Otis the dog snoring at times. Otis on his bed covered by a blanket I donated to him. I crocheted it WAY back when... so now it is all his. If I think about it I'll attach a picture. <BR> <BR> The dream - I would wake up frequently and go back to it. I was working, organizing, moving, I was on fire. I was completely into what I was doing, and apparently I liked it and was good at it. I don't know - could ... Sat, 4 Feb 2012 11:11:37 EST What a Difference A Day Makes Yesterday there wasn't enough food on the earth for me. I felt hungry all day. It was scaring me. I know I did not graze all day but it felt like I could have. Today, plenty of food. I ate when I was hungry and then felt satisfied. <BR> <BR> Yesterday - was feeling all sorry for myself at the grocery store looking at all the things I couldn't have. I felt emotionally overwhelmed. Huge pity pot, looking at all the things I couldn't have. Never occurred to me that there were a lot of... Fri, 3 Feb 2012 00:54:23 EST Powering Through Athletes know the phrase, or at least the concept. I learned it better this morning on my walk. I was heading out the door when I had a wardrobe malfunction. <BR> <BR> Not Janet Jackson wardrobe level, although with the Super Bowl fast approaching, it does bring back that memory. <BR> <BR> My wardrobe malfunction was the zipper on my hoodie. It was opening from the bottom. Couldn't be the 30 pounds I've gained since I bought it, now could it? <BR> <BR> Back to the house, fixed the zipp... Thu, 2 Feb 2012 09:47:15 EST There is a large immovable object trapped in my stomach... ... and it is bread. Bread. Yes bread. I ate gluten. Funny thing - just now - I typed I "hate" gluten before I caught my typo. <BR> <BR> Dinner - Philly Cheesesteak ala stepson's night to cook. We have this young man eating more vegetables in a week normally than he did for an entire year according to him. He lived on carbs and protein before he moved to our home. He's really tall & skinny, and a sweet young man. <BR> <BR> I'm digressing, but essentially, we take turns cooking. I... Thu, 2 Feb 2012 01:51:51 EST My February Goal - I WILL NOT WEIGH! I'm not going to weigh in February. Not once. Twice in the past two weeks I have weighed myself with emotional meltdowns after weighing. I need a break from the scale. <BR> <BR> This doesn't mean I'll be slacking, eating bad stuff and becoming a couch potato. I'll be sticking with my green smoothies, whole organic foods, etc. <BR> <BR> What I am noticing after a month of almost daily smoothies (I missed four days in the past month) - is that I am mentally more alert, more positive thi... Tue, 31 Jan 2012 18:11:38 EST If you're going through hell, keep going. Winston Churchill. On a day like this, those little serendipitous things that I see are meaningful. I just saw that quote on my google page. Settle in, it is going to be a journey. I am glad to be taking it, but honestly, I don't say that every moment of every day. <BR> <BR> Tue, 31 Jan 2012 00:03:39 EST How in the heck? Sadly I am going to be one of them. I used to sit & think... wow... I'm glad I'm not them. I want to be able to do this the way I want - not the way they are doing it. <BR> <BR> But now, I'm "them." <BR> <BR> Me, Kathy - the slow loser. <BR> <BR> Dang, I want those size 12 jeans today. Patience. Patience and work. Mon, 30 Jan 2012 11:28:43 EST Sometimes living healthy means... you just can't sleep in! Normal wake up time, 5 am. This morning I did not wake up until 5:50 am. <BR> <BR> Why is it - that on weekends, I wake up without an alarm and M-F - I appear to need one? <BR> <BR> This morning I woke up hungry. We ate dinner around 5:30 pm, and that was it. I finished off a cup of green smoothie left from yesterday and am having coffee. Yes, coffee. One good thing balances my bad thing. Coffee isn't all that bad except when you talk to people know know more than I do. Denial is b... Sun, 29 Jan 2012 10:08:24 EST A very cool Ah-Ha Yesterday while stressed around lunchtime, I ran to the cafeteria to grab some lunch. The hospital food is not so good. However, they make an effort to try to offer salads, etc. I arrived to find they were out of the Chef Salad, so I took an individual garden, piece of chicken and some strawberries. Back to my office. <BR> <BR> Sounds like a normal scenario right? <BR> <BR> No, not normal for my weird eating self. There was NO struggle inwardly in deciding this. When I ask for a sal... Sat, 28 Jan 2012 12:41:35 EST Friday Night Moments ago I was boosted from my living room by two 17-year old boys with sodas and a yearning to play games. We have PS3 don't you know. This is the first time in his life my stepson has been able to invite friends to his house. Long story - and another blog. <BR> <BR> Good thing I was kicked out of the living room. I was in there looking for eons for the free cable yoga and pilates shows. Couldn't find them. My last cable company had them... grr. I do need my own and was shopping ... Fri, 27 Jan 2012 23:01:21 EST I'm not even sure how to explain the meltdown... This morning was rough. It began when I woke up at 6 am. Normally my alarm goes off at 5:05 am, but apparently in my mad dash to try a new app last night, I failed to set the alarm. <BR> <BR> Damn. Seriously! I love this walk in the morning. I'm in the groove. I easily give up the groove when it pours, but I'm out there in my friggin' long underwear for heaven's sake many mornings. <BR> <BR> Regardless, I got up and headed for the kitchen. The coffee was made (I love timers) and I ... Thu, 26 Jan 2012 00:30:51 EST I overslept (missed my walk), weighed... and have gained. Not a good start... I decided today I'd get on the scale. I had not weighed for a while, so on I went. I gained. I gained. I gained. <BR> <BR> How? <BR> <BR> I don't have a period, I didn't eat what should go in to cause a gain. I am drinking my water, I'm not doing any workout to cause muscle gain... <BR> <BR> I am very sad. This is the kind of thing that makes me want to eat. Funny how my "I've been working really hard at this" and feeling proud of myself.... gets right down to "screw this" and my de... Wed, 25 Jan 2012 09:37:09 EST Those Fleeting Thoughts... Maybe I'm the only odd person out there who thinks of things and laughs aloud. I cannot help but crack myself up at times, because if not - I may crack up. <BR> <BR> This morning - fleeting thought... while walking from the work parking lot into the hospital. I'm holding my purse, my bag with coffee, smoothie, etc... looking down at my belly. "Wow... my belly is floppy. I need tighter tights. No, I need Spanx. No, I need to eat more veggies." Tue, 24 Jan 2012 12:56:25 EST It's a beautiful morning... Smoothies made, I walked 1.8 miles and I feel good. Very sweaty ascent up the hill - at least after I walked up I was sweating. Good thing I did not wear my long underwear this morning. A balmy 43 degrees. 35 and below is my long-underwear guideline... I think. <BR> <BR> Tue, 24 Jan 2012 09:45:47 EST Damn, so Hypocritical Too I'm in a fairly new relationship - one that laid out ground rules for what we could and couldn't deal with. Mine - was to tolerate my music & the life that brings on top of one's already full life. His - was to respect his gym time. <BR> <BR> OK - all kinds of respect for that. <BR> <BR> And as we headed into winter - my exercise has been compromised. I walk outside, and mild rain I can handle. Driving rain, wind howling stuff - I'm not doing! I have accommodated this by purchasing so... Mon, 23 Jan 2012 09:24:40 EST I love coffee and Sunday mornings... This morning I woke up in the dark, which is normal but I note - I'm looking forward to the end of dark mornings. Come on spring! <BR> <BR> Last night I tackled a craving and at age 51 I feel silly but I'm all tickled that I tackled the craving. Ha... morning writing skills... tickled... tackled. <BR> <BR> Regardless, I did get through it. Granted, I grabbed a yogurt (there are a few more in the refrigerator) and it worked. In fact DH wanted something sweet & had one too. Even though w... Sun, 22 Jan 2012 10:24:07 EST Saturday SLOW... and some yummy soy creamer! We have noted around home that our half & half experiment failed. There was a 4-5 day period where we did no dairy & both of us felt better. Than I decided to give up Sugar-Free French Vanilla (it had a lot of chemicals and no food) and the quest was on. <BR> <BR> The half and half experiment - I will detail here for a moment. I want to be able to go back and read why I should not have dairy because I am having a difficult inner fight. <BR> <BR> Why a fight? Because I love yogurt. ... Sat, 21 Jan 2012 12:11:21 EST Howling and I'm Disturbed Literally howling outside, even the dog is restless and disturbed. I wanted to go to the drive-in tonight but the weather gods aren't on our side. It has been pouring rain most of the day. It was dreadful on my drive home tonight. <BR> <BR> I was just reading Spark People motivational pages. I saw page after page after page of "I can" people and feel inspired, well - lubricated with lifestyle change enthusiasm. I admit - I said diet first instead of lifestyle. Sue me. <BR> <BR> I want... Sat, 21 Jan 2012 00:05:01 EST Friday I'm so pleased it is almost time for my weekend I could just crow. I have a few things on my plate this weekend, but nothing stressful or work-related. I will practice this weekend, cook, exercise and relax. Hopefully I will sort through some closet things and a few boxes. I'm at a point in my life where I just want less stuff stored and more useful stuff readily available. I keep thinking all that stuff in boxes is unecessary! Hence - most of the garage is unnecessary right? <BR> <B... Fri, 20 Jan 2012 14:31:28 EST Sugar Control Yesterday I read a great article on sugar "addiction" and I need to re-read daily. If it taught me anything, it taught me to own and take my power over a food. Sugar ready doesn't have the power over me, but I do have a physical reaction that causes me to want it. Sugar soothes. Oh really? No kidding. Sugary creamy things... yummy... <BR> <BR> After reading the article I discovered homemade molasses and chocolate chip cookies in the back. I know in 2009 I never once ate a baked good m... Thu, 19 Jan 2012 13:26:17 EST