http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=BLVINBUTTERFLYS BLVINBUTTERFLYS's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5335767 Hi Spark Friends! <BR> <BR> I miss being here, I miss everyone and I miss me the most of all… time to get back to business… once again! <BR> <BR> Daily Visualization: <BR> <BR> Today, imagine your "future self" giving your past (or current) self a hug. See your future self thanking your past self for having the courage to move forward in this healthy lifestyle journey. How does it feel to look back on your former self with new eyes? <BR> <BR> It is wonderful to know how far I have come so... Thu, 25 Apr 2013 22:21:58 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5285144 Hi Spark Friends! <BR> <BR> I figured I should get back to this business, and stop mulling around in my blah! <BR> <BR> I turned my knee while doing Jillian's 30 day shred. I went to the doctor and was told that I mostly just inflamed it and it took a while for it to get to where I could walk on it everyday without pain. I have had about 3 days of little to no pain now. To be honest, it has made me leary of "getting back on the bike" as the saying goes. The reason is that even now when I w... Wed, 13 Mar 2013 11:16:18 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5259467 Hi Spark Friends! <BR> <BR> WOW, Jillian is killing me, I actually cried through all the jumping jacks in set two! I persisted though and actually finished today (yesterday I come up about 4 minutes short just couldn't finish). Ouch do I hurt though! <BR> <BR> But today was hard for other reasons… more and more to do with my marriage and all that crap. Today I feel, “one day I will learn!” <BR> <BR> <em>39</em> <em>46</em> <em>39</em> <em>46</em> <em>39</em> <em>46</em> ... Fri, 22 Feb 2013 01:16:49 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5258239 Hi Spark Friends! <BR> <BR> Ooooo today I began Jillian’s 30 Day Shred added on top of the gym workout. Am I crazy… yea maybe so, but I know I can handle it. The Shred wasn’t half bad, all of Jillian’s workouts are fairly hard because she mixes cardio and strength and the switch up, while very effective, is hard! The hardest for me was believe it or not the thing we learn to do even at a very young age in school… jumping jacks… they kill me! I think its because I have so much weight being th... Thu, 21 Feb 2013 02:02:16 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5256868 Hi Spark Friends! <BR> <BR> Well today was a different kind of day. Today I stood on my own two feet again! What I mean by that is this: Since I began this re-journey a couple of weeks ago, I have been struggling with balancing my business, my weight loss, my family, my home, and other stuff. Trying to find balance in all of this was not easy to begin with, then there was another thing that bothered me. <BR> <BR> Recently I began playing an online video game with my husband again. For anyo... Tue, 19 Feb 2013 23:22:16 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5255616 Hi Spark Friends! <BR> <BR> Well day two began with a work out at the gym. I got in 43 minutes but had a bit of trouble because I pushed myself too hard right at first and got a lump of mucus stuck in a very sore throat and my chest was burning like a flame! I should have stuck with what I know and worked my way up slowly, but I was told that I could do the workout and so I tried and felt like I about killed myself. Now the thing I am proud of was that I really wanted to quit but I didn't. I... Tue, 19 Feb 2013 00:23:07 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5253996 Hi Spark Friends! <BR> <BR> Well I see other do this Day One, two, three thing, so I guess I will see if it works to just keep a journal going each day. I know it will help. <BR> <BR> <em>249</em> <em>249</em> <em>249</em> <em>249</em> <em>249</em> <em>249</em> <em>249</em> <em>249</em> <em>249</em> <em>249</em> <BR> <BR> Today's Visualization: <BR> <BR> "Take a minute today to collect all the negative thoughts or feelings you've been experiencing this week.... Sun, 17 Feb 2013 19:53:40 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5253906 Hi Spark Friends! <BR> <BR> This is a lengthy blog, and may get boring, and I do not hold it against anyone who does not read it through... but it is more for my benefit than for others, although I am always hoping to motivate and inspire, and hope someone else learns something too! <em>334</em> <BR> <BR> NEW WEIGHT LOSS PLAN BEGINNING TODAY: <BR> <BR> Back to SP: February 2, 2013 <BR> <BR> Height: 5' 6.5" <BR> <BR> Initial Starting Weight: 443 lb. (April 25, 2011) <BR> <BR> ... Sun, 17 Feb 2013 18:27:56 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5249863 Hi Spark Friends! <BR> <BR> I have been having some things on my mind lately... <BR> <BR> After taking off 160 lbs a year ago, I had a very bad year in 2012, a lot of personal issues... <BR> <BR> Separated from my husband, then got back together, then separated again, then complicated things with my best friend, he confused me by moving in on me while I was still trying to figure out things between me and my husband. Took advantage of me while I was vulnerable, and that made things even m... Thu, 14 Feb 2013 01:41:49 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5246962 Hi Spark Buddies! <BR> <BR> Well today I found myself filling out the paperwork and paying 6 months for the gym. I am actually very excited! I have a tread mill at home but it's getting boring. The gym has quite a bit of stuff I can mix it up and try to figure out why I have not been able to keep my workouts in the higher zones. The subscription to the gym also included 3 visits with a trainer, so I am looking forward to getting some input as well. <BR> <BR> So I get to report how I did my... Mon, 11 Feb 2013 21:15:46 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5245656 Today I had a break through. I have watched Biggest Loser for so many years and seen the trainers talk about how gaining weight and being fat isn’t just about eating food. I know that things in our lives have had direct effect on the person we become. I have seen the trainers push and push till they break someone down and get inside and find out what is controlling their behaviors. <BR> Well today I had that happen to me, and I didn't even expect it. <BR> <BR> Someone on my FB page complai... Sun, 10 Feb 2013 21:44:36 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5245247 2012 was a very long year for me, it started rough and just got rougher throughout the year. When 2013 rolled around I was so glad to see the year go, I vowed to make this year spectacular! <BR> <BR> I am a little late getting started, but I guess showing up is what's important! <BR> <BR> Here is my daily Spark Coach Check In: <BR> <BR> My visualization for the day: <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/1/6/l1650337814.jpg"> <BR> <BR> My daily self-assessment: <BR> <B... Sun, 10 Feb 2013 15:22:28 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4994393 Hello Friends... <BR> <BR> I want to thank those of you who send kind words, prayers, thoughts and more the other day when I posted that ever so gloomy blog. Sometimes things just have to be let out or you explode. So I did. *HUGS* to you all, my SP and FB friends and family are very special to me, and have been there many times when others have not, you are all appreciated so much! <BR> <BR> After that blog, I barely slept, then had a conversation with my best friend the next morning... it... Tue, 31 Jul 2012 09:08:54 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4991251 It has been a long time since I have written. A long time since I even logged in. A long time since I really felt like I should even try and care. <BR> <BR> My family and I have been dealing with many things this year. What began as a rough start to a new year has quickly turned into a bad year all the way around. We all know that in this journey we call life we can have good days and bad days, good weeks ad bad weeks, even good months and bad months, or at the most extreme; those days, wee... Sun, 29 Jul 2012 03:59:36 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4926373 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> I have come to a turning point in my life… again! <BR> <BR> Began a whole new set of goals added to the weight loss goals. These are more personal goals to help me with the anxiety and depression that I have been dealing with. Many of you know that I beat this last year with the help of a program called Cognitive Behavior Therapy or CBT as you will hear me call it. <BR> <BR> Unfortunately as I have been discovering, I did not quite beat it, I must have just scrap... Thu, 14 Jun 2012 13:19:21 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4885704 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> Sometimes we have good days, and sometimes we have bad ones. Sometimes they stretch into good weeks or bad weeks, or good months, or bad months, or even good years or, (heaven forbid) bad years. Well today I stepped on the scale and I reached 160 lbs lost and was reminded of the last year! WOW! Take my breath away! I began comparison on my pics… and was so amazed at what I see. Now don’t get me wrong, I am not even done… but oh so far I have come, in just a little ov... Thu, 17 May 2012 12:14:59 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4884986 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> I hope everyone had a wonderful hump day! I did! <BR> <BR> My day: <BR> <BR> Eating – no slip ups today! Woot! Stayed within my calories! <BR> <BR> Working out – Today was my day off… so I did not do much. <BR> I did as follows today: <BR> <BR> 1.2 miles on the treadmill <BR> 5016 steps today! <BR> <BR> ---- It was another great day; however, I did find that when I do not start the day with a great workout then I get lazy all day… I don’t think days off a... Wed, 16 May 2012 23:17:09 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4883360 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> I hope everyone had a wonderful day! I did! <BR> <BR> My day: <BR> <BR> Eating – no slip ups today! Woot! Stayed within my calories! <BR> <BR> Working out – My workouts today were awesome! I am really trying to push myself to an all new limit and prove just what I am capable of. <BR> I did as follows today: <BR> <BR> 1.2 miles on the treadmill <BR> 30 min Shred It with Weights workout with Jillian <BR> 30 min of Billy Blanks Bootcamp <BR> 15 min of leisure... Tue, 15 May 2012 22:42:50 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4881758 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> Just a few words to update everyone and also stay within my new goals of blogging every day. I hope everyone had a good weekend, a fabulous Mother’s Day and is also having a wonderful day! <BR> <BR> I lost 1 lb last week! Always glad to take off a pound… wanted more, but I will not complain because if I want more, I have to try for more, and let’s face it, last week I come up short! It’s a new week, let’s get it done! <BR> <BR> I had a good day myself: <BR> <BR> ... Mon, 14 May 2012 23:04:16 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4860414 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Ok we’re gonna give this a go again… <BR> <BR> I have found that I am slipping… A LOT! Wearing the band over the last week has opened my eyes to exactly why I have not been losing. I let it get me down last week and I felt really lousy… not to mention that having a birthday this week didn’t do much for my motivation either. However, I am determined! I will beat out this depression that is trying to creep back in, I will keep on pushing, and I will come out victorious ... Tue, 1 May 2012 00:34:06 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4847358 Hi Friends... <BR> <BR> Start off on a semi good note... I did lose this week, not much, just 0.8 lb. but after this week, I will take it! <BR> <BR> Update on the mini challenge... <BR> <BR> Personal Challenge: <em>39</em> <BR> To put on makeup everyday! <BR> <BR> Nutritional Challenge: <em>39</em> <BR> To not eat out all week! <BR> <BR> Strength Training Challenge: <em>39</em> <BR> 8 hours of strength training this week! <BR> <BR> Cardio Challenge: <em>39</em> <BR> 15 miles on ... Sun, 22 Apr 2012 23:44:59 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4836838 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> Just a quick note to say thank you to everyone who has supported me in the last few weeks with comments and goodies and notes of encouragement and support. I have been having a hard time the last few weeks with trying to stay motivated and keep on moving on. <BR> <BR> I lost 6.4 lbs this last week, so I think the scale is finally starting to move yet again. There for a while I felt like I just had to get away from the “trying” so hard which was getting me no result... Sun, 15 Apr 2012 23:14:43 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4801684 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Ok friends... I missed posting Wed and Thur because of internet issues... So, here is those two days... <BR> <BR> Wednesday's Blog: <BR> <BR> Well I seem to be having a heck of a time getting my blogs posted at night between the site not wanting to work, and me just not wanting to be at a computer… but at least I am getting them posted the next day. <BR> <BR> Last night I spent 2 hours going through all my clothes. Today I am taking my “too big” clothes to a friend.... Fri, 23 Mar 2012 17:22:07 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4797970 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/2/l22997835.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I tried to get this posted last night at the end of the day like I wanted to every night but for some reason my page kept timing out and I could get nothing posted... so here it is today! <BR> <BR> Ok, now I know yesterday I busted out of my blog with tons of excitement… it continues today! The new eating plan is working and I have dropped 3 lbs this week so far! That brings my weight loss to... Wed, 21 Mar 2012 11:27:26 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4796092 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> WORD OF WARNING: The excitement in this blog may be more than you can handle... may want to consult a doctor before reading! hehehe! <BR> <BR> This morning... <BR> <BR> AAAAAAAAAAAA........... I just put on a size 20 shirt and a 42 bra (that's an 18!) and they fit! *doin’ a done girl dance* AAAAaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!! <BR> <BR> <em>104</em> <em>224</em> <em>9</em> <em>104</em> <em>224</em> <em>9</em> <em>104</em> <em>224</em> <em>9</em> <em>104</em> <BR> <BR> La... Tue, 20 Mar 2012 00:59:27 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4793386 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Today I was behind on all my emails and reading my friends blogs. I will be getting those caught up before I go to bed tonight; I got a bit behind with all the drama in my life over the weekend. <BR> <BR> A quick note as to the drama… I have chosen not to socialize with anyone involved with that drama anymore. I feel I am in a very sensitive area of my life, and I have no time for everyone else's drama. I am actually happier for this move; it has made my life much more... Sun, 18 Mar 2012 13:24:45 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4791113 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/6/9/l691709848.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Today I may not seem my cheery motivated self, so please excuse me, trying not to have a bad day… <BR> <BR> I totally lost it Thursday! I binged out on pizza all night... feeling very upset that my scale keeps moving up even though I am doing and doing and doing what I should. So totally upset that I can eat to perfection for the day and work out in the morning but a night time workout I ... Fri, 16 Mar 2012 18:58:14 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4782040 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Ok so it’s the end of my first week of March Madness! <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/9/0/l909614990.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I learned one very important thing this week… spite the fitness level AND spite the foods I eat, I will not stay in fat burning mode NOR will I lose much when I do not get my water in! <BR> <BR> INCREDIBLY DIRE to get all your water… please remember that! This I know… I just still miss it some days! <BR> <BR> <img src="http... Sun, 11 Mar 2012 13:31:28 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4778113 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Today was just a fairly quiet day… the scale did move… FINALLY; however, I will be waiting till the end of the week to record my weight for the week. It does let me know that the changes I made in my workouts and my eating might be making a difference, so I am happy about that! <BR> <BR> I did day 5 of my March Madness today… body is still very sore, of course, but today was arms, so it was not as hard as abs are on me. Of course treadmill and some aerobics with Richa... Thu, 8 Mar 2012 20:46:28 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4776570 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Well, tonight I finished March Madness day 4! WooHoo! Tonight wasn’t so bad but OMG last night… day 3 was Oooowwww! <BR> <BR> It was abs night and WOW did Nichole try to kill me… hehehe, then of course I followed that up with The Biggest Loser 30 day Jumpstart and did the Cardio LvL 1 and the Cardio LvL 2 along with more abs! Youch, youch, youch my abs hurt today! <BR> <BR> The good thing about today was that I followed up yesterday’s abs with hips, glutes and thigh... Wed, 7 Mar 2012 23:16:35 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4774182 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/3/7/l378792289.jpg"> <BR> <BR> So, day two of my March Madness… well if you recall, I did not feel like working out, I was tired, and sore, and had been frustrated and stressed out all day… however, I was determined to go get it, and get it done. It actually gave me an enlightening moment! <BR> <BR> I DID work out… <BR> <BR> I DID do my entire workout… <BR> <BR> I DID 5 minutes more than I planned… <BR> <BR> I DID do i... Tue, 6 Mar 2012 17:27:09 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4772617 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/4/2/l42126513.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Ok yesterday I began my Goals for March Madness! <BR> <BR> M-oving <BR> A-(butt) <BR> D-aily <BR> N-ever <BR> E-ver <BR> S-tay <BR> S-atisfied <BR> <BR> <BR> Day One: <BR> Sunday March 4th: (Lower Body)… <BR> 10 min Spark Lower Body Blast <BR> 20 minute iFit Workout <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/1/l216801722.jpg"> <BR> <BR> The Spark Lower Body Blast wasn't too bad, I did work my l... Mon, 5 Mar 2012 20:49:04 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4769502 Goals for March Madness! <BR> <BR> M-oving <BR> A-(butt) <BR> D-aily <BR> N-ever <BR> E-ver <BR> S-tay <BR> S-atisfied <BR> <BR> Here are my own goals for my MARCH MADNESS: <BR> <BR> Day One: <BR> Sunday March 4th: (Lower Body)… <BR> 10 min Spark Lower Body Blast <BR> 20 minute iFit Workout <BR> <BR> Day Two: <BR> Monday March 5th: (Upper Body/30 min cardio)… <BR> 10 min Spark All About Arms <BR> 20 minute iFit Workout <BR> 30(+) min Billy Blanks Bootcamp <BR> <BR> Day Three: <BR... Sun, 4 Mar 2012 02:43:40 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4768052 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> I spent the evening visiting all my Spark Friends and catching up with how everyone is doing. I know I have not blogged much since way back before the New Year. I really missed you all so much! <BR> <BR> It is amazing to see how some of you have really lost so much weight, and made so many changes in your lives. It is absolutely wonderful! Congrats to everyone who is still hanging in there, you may not have lost much weight, maybe none at all, but you are still here,... Sat, 3 Mar 2012 01:34:16 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4766123 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Well today has been a much better day than yesterday was. With the tornado and everything else going on, it was a pretty lousy day all together. However today I woke up with a smile on my face, and determined to make it a good day… and you know what… it was! <BR> <BR> First off, many of you know I was interviewing for another job last night, well I have officially been hired! I was so glad to see those words: <BR> <BR> “Congratulations! You are now officially Transc... Thu, 1 Mar 2012 21:22:55 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4763865 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Today was an emotional Leap Day. We were hit by a devastating F4 tornado last night and a community near us got hit hard. 10 reported dead, over 100 injured, 30+ businesses completely demolished, 300+ homes unlivable. As usual when we get hit, the communities surrounding always come to aid, so there is never any lack of help and support; however, it was still a blow to all of us in this area. <BR> <BR> Please keep the community in your prayers as I share some of the d... Wed, 29 Feb 2012 17:34:21 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4752250 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/2/4/l24336257.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I had a wonderful day three yesterday! Stayed within all my boundaries again and worked out like I was suppose to! Just didn't have a chance to write… <BR> <BR> Today was a fabulous day four of this week! <BR> <BR> My meals looked like this: <BR> Breakfast: 1/2 cup cottage cheese & 1/2 cup scrambled egg <BR> Lunch: 1 Muscle Milk Light <BR> Dinner: 3 Chicken Nuggets & 3 Pierogies <BR> Evening Snack: 8 oz Nectar Sh... Wed, 22 Feb 2012 22:15:31 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4748732 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/3/3/l334504433.jpg"> <BR> <BR> I had an awesome day two… <BR> <BR> My meals looked like this: <BR> Breakfast: 1 Muscle Milk Light & Vitamins <BR> Lunch: ½ of Kat’s Enchilada’s <BR> Dinner: ½ cup Cottage Cheese & 1 Mild Cheddar Cow Pals <BR> Evening Snack: 8 oz Nectar/Banana Cream Shake & 2 oz Filet Mignon <BR> For 865 calories/39 g. carbs/32 g. fat/102 g. protein <BR> Excellent job on staying in range of everything today!... Tue, 21 Feb 2012 00:25:02 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4747032 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Well, here I am again, trying to get back into the habit of writing every night. I really need to, because things seem much more clear when I do. <BR> <BR> I have struggled lately with pretty much everything... not working out, not eating right, (which is taking a big toll on me... the lack of protein is making my hair fall out badly), not monitoring my food, not recording my food, etc. etc... So, I figured when you lose your way, sometimes the best way is to begin aga... Mon, 20 Feb 2012 03:23:33 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4741442 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> Well I ended up getting up before 5am today. I was irritated beyond words as Billy climbed into my bed reeking of cigarette smoke and smelling like the grease and irritants he works with. I just really could not believe that he would actually crawl into bed all dirty like that when he knows that the cigarette smoke makes me nauseated and he has heard me complain for years about Travis crawling into bed after work without a shower. I just could not believe he has pull... Thu, 16 Feb 2012 09:14:04 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4659012 Dear Scales, <BR> <BR> You and I just have to talk <BR> We're not seeing eye to eye <BR> And I think it's your fault <BR> <BR> I used to get up every morning <BR> And look forward to seeing you <BR> Maybe you noticed that now I only visit weekly <BR> And that is getting very hard to do <BR> <BR> Your not a stable friend to have <BR> All the ups and downs are just too bad <BR> I think I need to make a change <BR> And we all know it's you who's to blame <BR> <BR> I have decided to make a ne... Thu, 5 Jan 2012 09:10:54 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4638896 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> Looking in the mirror this morning I was reminded of some things. Life has been rather challenging as of late because of my trying marriage, finances and other pressing life challenges. <BR> <BR> While I looked into the mirror I was reminded of a nickname I have been called by friends over the years “Stormy” due to the grey/blue coloring of my eyes. An old boyfriend used to tell me that the more worried and stressed out I got the darker grey my eyes would get. Alth... Mon, 26 Dec 2011 14:44:21 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4630855 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> I hope everyone had a fabulous day! <BR> <BR> I woke up this morning and decided enough was enough! I worked my butt off last week and only dropped 3 lbs… (For those of you who do not know I had bariatric surgery… I should mention it and say 3 lbs is way low!) <BR> <BR> Don’t get me wrong, I am glad of every pound I lose, I just can’t seem to get this bariatric eating down. I feel I am doing fairly well on the exercise… well last week anyhow, this week I plan to kic... Mon, 19 Dec 2011 01:05:28 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4628974 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> I have had a hard time blogging lately... for some reason I just don't feel like talking too much. Although I am aware that keeping things in too much is not good for me, and usually ends up being a reason for added stress and such... I have still had a hard time bringing myself to blog. <BR> <BR> This week I have done fairly descent in getting back into the groove of working out and eating right. I HAVE had some pizza here and there... it is my hardest demon to beat.... Sat, 17 Dec 2011 09:11:10 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4618821 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/9/6/l962369029.jpg"> <BR> <BR> Around 1990 my mom began dating a man. <BR> Sweet as can be, and different from others. <BR> Strong, yet gentle. Persistent, yet thoughtful. Serious, yet hilarious. <BR> Pain in your eyes and shadows in your walk, a hard life was on your face. <BR> Even at a young age, you knew pain and suffering. <BR> Yet to hear it, you'd never know. <BR> With pride and strength you walked with confidence, something I always a... Fri, 9 Dec 2011 09:20:32 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4611880 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/9/l597409349.jpg"> <BR> <BR> In the Healthy Reflections for one of the days this week it talks about becoming the person you want to be. The saying from Cummings drives that home when you realize not only is it a struggle to get there, but also it will be a life struggle to stay there. The question asked in the reflections was this: “Are your priorities from self and soul-searching or do they come from pressure from other people?” <BR> <BR> T... Sun, 4 Dec 2011 13:43:17 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4609113 Good morning friends! <BR> <BR> Well I finally got some much needed sleep last night, lay down to watch TV and slept from about 9pm till morning… I felt so much better! <BR> <BR> This week has been rough on me mentally and emotionally. I held it together for my mom as much as I could, but was really falling apart inside… this week when my father went into surgery. Thankful that he emerged from surgery and the cancer was gotten… 100% which is a big relief! However, the doctors are still wait... Fri, 2 Dec 2011 09:48:03 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4604138 Good morning Friends! <BR> <BR> Not got much on my mind this morning, however; I promised myself I would say a few things everyday in order to help keep my head clear of garble. Of course just when I say that, I end up writing a chapter… <em>246</em> <BR> <BR> Began my day with a different type of treat today… I made my “shake” with my fat free, sugar free hot chocolate mix in it. It wasn’t half bad, kind of thick and grainy, (the shake mix makes it that way), but the overall warm fuzzy f... Tue, 29 Nov 2011 09:57:21 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4602482 Hi Friends! <BR> <BR> Well, I figured I had better get back into my groove, and part of that is to get back to blogging. Have you ever noticed how lost you can get when you don’t “talk” to yourself every day? I don’t mean talking to you in a manner of out loud, I mean writing. For me it is an escape from reality, yet facing reality, and getting things out, and dealing with things that are bothering you. I really do not know what I would do without it… oh wait, yes I do… TOTALLY lose myself, ... Mon, 28 Nov 2011 10:30:38 EST http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=4553089 Hello Friends! <BR> <BR> I hope everyone is having a wonderful, magnificent, and fabulous Tuesday! <BR> <BR> I feel like I am celebrating anniversaries all over the place lately! <BR> Today is my 6 month anniversary since I got off my duff and dedicated my life to the Spark way of living... and all its glory! Yea for 6 months of putting forth effort, not quitting, and picking myself back up spite the pitfalls! 101.4 lbs lost in that 6 months! <BR> <em>104</em> <em>9</em> <em>104</em> ... Tue, 25 Oct 2011 19:35:33 EST