BJORKFAN's SparkPeople Blog BJORKFAN's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community I'm back. No excuses, no recriminations, just a better outlook on life and the strongest desire to get back on track. Haven't logged in forever, haven't worked out in a while, but I'm changing that now, today. Thu, 6 Sep 2012 15:57:49 EST How many times do I need to start over? I'm disappointed in myself. This is like the fourth time I've had to start over in the last few months. I stopped tracking and I began to eat and I gained four pounds. This needs to stop, but I've said that before. How many times do I need to say it to myself before it sinks in? <BR> <BR> So, I'm starting again. It's the only thing to do, isn't it? Wed, 9 May 2012 13:14:54 EST AGAIN. (so, day 1) Feels like Groundhog Day. I've been doing very badly the last few weeks. I can't seem to keep my head in the game. There has been binging. My exercise fell by the wayside. Today I start again in earnest. I got my running (well, jogging) in, I'm tracking my food again, drinking my water... I gained like 4 pounds in a very short amount of time, but at least I haven't completely started over. I need to do this. I need to stay focused. Visiting this site every day is CRUCIAL. <BR> <BR> Here I go... Sat, 14 Apr 2012 15:00:59 EST Let's just... Forget the last two weeks ever happened and get back to work. :) Thu, 5 Apr 2012 13:06:27 EST The prodigal child returns... Okay, neither am I the prodigal child nor was I gone very long, but still. I threw an adult-sized tantrum on Sunday and haven't logged any food or exercised since then. I admit, I was angry with myself because I'd only managed to lose 6 pounds in three weeks. <BR> <BR> It's ridiculous; that's the program, isn't it? Two pounds a week. And yet, I feel like I've lost more, and more quickly, in the past, which is why the slow, healthy approach is so frustrating. But I'm back to logging today, a... Thu, 22 Mar 2012 12:25:05 EST Day 16? I think it's Day 16. I seem to remember seriously starting the day the Academy Awards aired, which was Feb. 29, I think. Anyway, something like Day 16. A little over two weeks. Things are going rather well, and while I still have a very, very long way to go, I feel okay about it. I've been using the treadmill almost every day, but today I got a bonus and decided to spend some of it on an inexpensive rower. Should be nice to have an alternative, for when I don't feel like going out to the gara... Thu, 15 Mar 2012 16:14:33 EST Daily Grind Was listening to an interview this morning. An actress was talking about how she'd made it to 200 pounds during her pregnancy and both she and the interviewer were talking about how disgusting it was. She mentioned how she didn't want to leave her house near the end, because she was so ugly. <BR> <BR> My first goal is to be 200 lbs by my birthday in June. My first goal is to be the weight this actress described as disgusting. <BR> <BR> And I know this is how it works, how society works. How... Tue, 13 Mar 2012 19:44:51 EST Weekend Did well, except on Sunday when I went over my allotted calories by a little over 200. I've been trying to stay in the middle-to-low range, so I really messed up. (sad trombone) <BR> <BR> OH WELL. Fresh new week, right? <BR> <BR> NOTE TO SELF: TRACK YOUR WATER. Mon, 12 Mar 2012 13:19:06 EST Keeping on Still sticking to it. Logging. Walking. Postponed Couch 2 5K because a previous cold was making my chest hurt quite a bit when I ran. I'll try again today. A little under 2 weeks and I'm down nearly 8 pounds! Sat, 10 Mar 2012 14:26:51 EST Day something or other... Didn't have a chance to run last night, because my in-laws came over and by the time they left I was ready to sleep. Week 2 of Couch 2 5k will wait until tonight, I guess. Meanwhile, the scale told me I lost almost an entire pound since yesterday. I am baffled, but I'll take it. I really should stop weighing myself daily. Wed, 7 Mar 2012 20:15:59 EST One week down, 51 to go? I realize that weight loss and management is an ongoing thing, but my first long-term goal (the second being maintenance) is now only 51 weeks away. It's very funny to put it that way, and to think of it as something that's both so very far away, and not all that far away at all. What's a year compared to how long I've been overweight? No time at all. And, yet, I still struggle with impatience, and sometimes a year feels like it's a lifetime away. I guess that to really make this work it has ... Tue, 6 Mar 2012 12:11:21 EST Work Lunch The first Monday of every month, we get a free lunch here at work. Today is that Monday, and I unfortunately chose to eat that instead of bringing my lunch in. I made a terrible choice because although they normally have some healthier options, today they had Mexican and there was NOTHING healthy about it. Even the salad had cheese on it. I don't know how to count what I ate. I tried not to eat too much, but I'm sure I ingested a horrific number of calories anyway. But, hey, I've learned my l... Mon, 5 Mar 2012 15:23:25 EST Day 3 of Couch 2 5k/Weekend Completed! Felt really good doing it, which I guess is a sign that I'm ready to move on to Week 2. <BR> <BR> On the eating front, it is harder to eat well on the weekend, particularly when you're down to the last bit of groceries and you don't have healthy options. That said, I still kept within my ranges, so I shouldn't be too hard on myself at this point. This coming week should be pretty good. Meanwhile, Aunt Flo has arrived and I wonder if that's affecting the scale. Still hovering on 2... Sun, 4 Mar 2012 20:17:14 EST Weigh-In Couldn't wait until tomorrow. Lost 2 pounds. It's oddly anti-climactic. (Especially because it's not unusual for me to gain/lose that much within a single day, it seems.) I wish it were more, of course, because I feel like I've been doing the right things and I want it now, now, now, but this is the way it should be and a loss is better than a gain. Sat, 3 Mar 2012 12:45:42 EST Cardio Time On the days I'm not doing Couch 2 5k I walk for 30 minutes, usually at a little under a 15/mile clip. Everyone on SP seems to have March goals and my goal is to start doing 35 minutes on the days I just walk and do ST. This may not seem like a lot more, and I'm sure I can do it easily enough. The only reason it's a "goal" I haven't already implemented is because I exercise when I get home from work and I feel bad about leaving my husband to take care of the baby for another 30 minutes while I... Fri, 2 Mar 2012 15:30:06 EST Lunch (Corner Bakery Cafe) Didn't have time to pack my lunch today. Luckily there are at least a couple of options within a couple of blocks of my office where I can get lunch. Today I opted for Corner Bakery Cafe, which has ALL its nutritional info on its website. You can get many different "combos" (half a sandwich + soup or some kind of salad) for under 600 calories. Naturally, I wanted something as close to 400 as possible. Found the Mom's Turkey and the 3 Lentil soup. Had less than half of the bag of chips, which... Fri, 2 Mar 2012 15:16:01 EST Couch 2 5k Day 2 of Couch 2 5k done and done. Oddly, felt better today after work out than I did yesterday, when I just walked. Thu, 1 Mar 2012 23:17:26 EST Weigh-In My plan is to weigh myself on Sunday, since it will be a week since I started, and then maybe not again for another few weeks or a month. I don't want to get discouraged if the numbers aren't what I would like them to be. (And, yet, I do want to hold myself responsible if I'm not losing enough for some reason. Oh, dilemma!) Thu, 1 Mar 2012 13:05:31 EST Day 5: Patience & Just Do It This is my 5th day of tracking. I write that not because it's some sort of milestone--it's just another day--but because of how very far I have to go in my ... struggle? I don't know if that's a good way of putting it. To qualify my weight loss as a struggle seems simplistic. To write, too, that I reached a low, decided to do something about it, and am now, currently, _doing it_ also seems simplistic. Just do it is a great slogan but approaching losing weight and becoming healthy in that mann... Thu, 1 Mar 2012 12:19:31 EST Weaknesses As this is only my third day, I do wonder when this will start to get hard, and I can only imagine my stumbling will come via food. Exercise I've never had a problem with. I've been lazy, yes, but exercise doesn't scare me and when I'm motivated enough, I will do it. Food is different. Sweets are my weakness. Ice cream is my ruin. I don't know what it is about it that turns me into a lunatic. <BR> <BR> I know the only way I'll be able to control myself vis a vis food is to log it. The only ... Wed, 29 Feb 2012 15:36:16 EST Couch 2 5k BTW, I'm using the Couch 2 5k app on my Android phone. It's super easy. Basically, a Robot Lady voice tells you exactly when to run and when to walk, and it keeps track of what you've already done. (I think you can even log it on their website. I haven't tried). No looking at a stopwatch! Wed, 29 Feb 2012 14:19:39 EST Tags I know SparkPeople's blogging feature is sort of an afterthought--it isn't why people primarily use the site--but I do wish they would add a tags feature... and ALLOW FOR HTML. Wed, 29 Feb 2012 13:07:58 EST Dinner (Spinach Basil Salad Recipe) Last night we had something we stumbled across on Spinach Basil Pasta. Very tasty, and within my ranges. (I was more in the middle of my calorie range, rather than the low end, but that seems okay. Being too strict might just set me up for disaster.) The recipe called for prosciutto, but we eschewed that and didn't miss it at all. Also, it called for *way* too much olive oil, so using substantially less is good for lowering its fat content. All in all, under 400 calories. Note... Wed, 29 Feb 2012 12:49:23 EST Pant pant pant Completed Day 1 of Couch 2 5k. Am not dead! In fact, I feel pretty good. Sweaty, tired, but good! Tue, 28 Feb 2012 22:07:54 EST Organization will be my friend! I like lists. I like to-dos. I enjoy Moleskines and both paper and electronic calendars. If anything, these things make me feel like I have a modicum of control. A perfect tool for weight loss, surely, is organization? <BR> <BR> So, a brief to-do. I'm going to keep this going for the first 20 pounds. After that, I will reassess both my fitness routine and my calorie consumption. <BR> <BR> Thing one: <BR> <BR> 30 minutes of cardio every day. It sounds like a lot, but it isn't, especially c... Tue, 28 Feb 2012 16:04:12 EST Ouch The day before yesterday I worked out for only the second time with the (dreaded) medicine ball. Squats, twists, lunges, "woodchopper"... I'm still sore, which I suppose means something got worked out and that some muscle somewhere is forming, but ouch. I skipped yesterday, and I guess I'll be doing it today. Maybe I should do more core workouts, since my thighs still feel thrashed. <BR> <BR> The joys of getting in "shape" when you've been out of it for so long are incalculable. Tue, 28 Feb 2012 12:46:19 EST Day 1 There isn't much to say about today except that I hope it's the beginning of something great. Scratch that. I know it's the beginning of something great. I've been out of shape/obese since before I graduated from high school. I'm turning 34 this year; I had a baby last year. I want something different for myself. I don't want the looming spectre of diabetes. I don't want to be a bad example for my son. So, today I get real. Tracking, exercising, pushing myself/holding myself responsible. I've... Mon, 27 Feb 2012 19:30:18 EST