BBERG0521's SparkPeople Blog BBERG0521's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Why can’t I do this???!!!! So my problem is is there’s no thinking before craving hits the only thought I have is gosh that sounds good then without thinking any further I act on it and then that’s when the bins comes in. Those are the random cravings. Those are the cravings that come whenever they feel like it nothing triggers it other than it comes and I’m like hey that does sound good but let’s have it. Then there is the nighttime over eating. this always happens when I’m leaving work driving home and realizing I ... Wed, 11 Oct 2017 08:41:58 EST The stress of eating The stress of eating <BR> <BR> Well I met with my personal trainer last week. She wants me to eat 1900-2200 calories a day. And I totally get why she wants me to do so. The problem is – I have been trying and the only way (physically and financially) I can eat that many is to eat junk food and I don’t want to eat junk food. I have stressed so much this last week on what to eat and how much. It really brought me down. <BR> <BR> When I sit and flip through my Facebook feed I see so many Wei... Mon, 11 May 2015 11:06:49 EST Day 1 of the rest of my life So the story good one day then bad the next. But for me it's like do good for 5 minutes then bad for the next 5 days. Darn viscous cycle of yo yo dieting. But I don't want to diet. I don't want to give up the foods I love. Could I eat healthier? Yes of course I can. And I will. But it will be baby steps as I get better because I have come a long way from binge eating and I refuse to go back there. I'm more mindful now but I could always use the tweaking. See my issue is that I'm l... Sun, 26 Apr 2015 08:34:38 EST Reflections of day 1 TF Well day 1 of Turbo Fire is under the belt! What a work out too! It was so hard to get some of those moves down and I got so frustrated. I think I stood there a few times trying to predict what she was going to do. I checked the rotation calendar and it looks like you do this for 5 days before moving on. So lets hope after 5 attempts I get this down. <BR> <BR> Yesterday I went for a walk during lunch. It was quite nice. Very windy but nice! I am hoping to walk again today on lunch. It reall... Thu, 16 Apr 2015 09:54:55 EST Working at getting back at it and prefectionist thinking Its been a while since I have blogged on here. I have such a hard time sticking to one thing for long when it comes to certain things. Take exercise for a while. I have no problem sticking with exercise but I get bored. I have never completed a workout program before. Not even the 21 day fix. And that is 21 days! I got half way through Piyo then got sick. I bet I would have finished that one. Currently – or last 2 weeks – I have been doing ChaLEAN Extreme. That is an awesome program. But my a... Wed, 15 Apr 2015 10:42:42 EST Lesson's learned Well I have learned many lessons this last week. I just hope that it all sinks in and when an event or the binge urge comes that I will remember my lesson. I suppose it if I use it every day then it will help but I don’t want to be faced with events all the time or binges. I want smooth sailing so that my healthy steps become habits before the next event or binge urge arrives. <BR> <BR> What are you talking about you may say? Well I will tell you. <BR> <BR> My weight keeps going up the sam... Mon, 4 Aug 2014 10:41:51 EST Hard habit to break Everybody has hard habits that are hard to break. For me it's snacking after work that is the hardest for me to break. When I get home from work I get ravenous and want to just eat and eat. I have tried to stop the habit but it's so hard. Really I have been pretty good about not snacking after work and if I do and make sure that it's within my points. What works for me is to make dinner right away when I get home or to work out right away when I get home. So far so good and I really hope I ca... Wed, 16 Jul 2014 08:27:04 EST Challenging goals I honestly cannot remember the last time I had a challenging goal and actually achieved it. I always set goals and things I'm going to do and then don't pull through with them. It's been the story of my life. <BR> <BR> Recently I got sized for a bridesmaids dress and was not happy with what they came back with size wise. I am determined to work out and eat right and go back in a month for different size. <BR> <BR> So what is my action plan? I plan on working out and eating right and I pla... Tue, 15 Jul 2014 08:19:16 EST Grateful So yesterday was my first 5K. I did the color run and it was amazing! I went with my best friend and two other girls and we had a blast. Two of the girls really did not want to run but that is okay because my friend ran with me for most of it. I definitely could have ran more but stayed with my friend. But what I am really grateful for is for the opportunity to be able to do this. Grateful to have a great friend who stood by me the whole time and grateful to have the support of my husband wh... Mon, 14 Jul 2014 08:17:57 EST Why oh why The question I need to ask myself is why. Why do I find it so hard to stick to my program? Why is it so hard to get up and run knowing I have my first ever 5k coming up July 13? Why is it so hard for me to just work out in general? Why is sticking to my points range so hard? Why do I always binge eat? Why, in general, do I eat when I am not hungry? Why is it so hard to stay motivated? <BR> <BR> I honestly wish I knew the answers to all of my questions. I just don’t get it. Its plan and simp... Thu, 26 Jun 2014 08:59:50 EST FRESH START Well this weekend was pretty fun! There was a pool part Friday night, got highlights on Saturday, and Sunday spent time with the family! It was great. But I realized this morning as I stepped on the scale that I needed a reset. I need a fresh start. So I changed my Weight Watchers WI day and reset my weight history (im only 2.5 weeks in) and am starting fresh. I think this is what I need. I think Monday is a good day because it will help keep me accountable on the weekends knowing weigh in is... Mon, 23 Jun 2014 11:01:54 EST Habit tweaks Thinking about everything I am doing right and everything I am doing wrong on my journey made me realize there is one major aspect I could tweak. Yes I could stick to working out. Yes I could track everything. But the major thing I have issues with is moderation. <BR> <BR> I'm horrible at that. I have it in my mind that if I don't eat all I can now I won't know when I'll get the treat next. Drives me nuts because I'll take a handful of cookies and shovel them in my mouth when in all reality... Sat, 21 Jun 2014 07:10:16 EST FRUSTRATION Where did my motivation go? How do I get it back? These are the questions I have asked myself for about a week now. Im getting frustrated. My eating has been off the chart and I gained back what I lost the previous week plus 1 more pound. Why is it so hard for me to just stick to my program? Why? I know its because I just want to wake up one day and have the perfect body. Well it wont happen and I need to just stop wishing that and do it the hard way. I know the pounds didn’t come on over nig... Thu, 19 Jun 2014 08:23:13 EST frustration I am at my witts end with my 2 year old!!!! He is so naughty I just don’t get it. If he doesn’t get his way he throws a tantrum and hits us. He will arch his body so that its impossible to hold him. Then when we put him down he hits his head into the floor. I immediately stop it by picking him up and I am sure that is reinforcing the behavior but I am paranoid with heads since I have an aneurysm clip in mine. I don’t want him doing that. <BR> <BR> Maybe we went wrong somewhere. Hes always b... Wed, 28 May 2014 09:09:02 EST BLC 25 GOALS Goals, Goals, Goals! It is always good to have and set goals! <BR> <BR> My goals for BLC25 are as follows: <BR> <BR> 1) track all my food – I am so horrible at doing this! Sometimes I wonder if I believe that if I don’t track it then it doesn’t count?? I hope that is not the case. I hope its just pure laziness! LOL <BR> <BR> 2) exercise 5-6 days per week – I really want to get all the ball with my C25k program. I have my first ever 5k set up for July and I need to make myself a runner! I... Mon, 5 May 2014 10:53:25 EST HEALTHY EATING $$ Well today is my day #1 of my healthy eating month from my trainer! I am excited to get this going. I had breakfast today and I am still satisfied. Of course I am at work and my mind is not on food right now. We will see how it goes when I get home from work if I binge or not. <BR> <BR> I did have a bit of sticker shock after I bought all the healthy foods. Man its expensive to eat healthy. Why must it be that way? Oh well. I promised I would try it and see. I do need to remember that I bou... Mon, 14 Apr 2014 10:33:05 EST Darn binge! So I know I really should write about how I had a success with my emotional eating but this isn’t that time. Nope. <BR> <BR> I do so well during the day at work – controlled environment – but once I get home, I binge. I know it’s the transition from work to home and the immediate change of different stressors. I can at least acknowledge that one. But what happens when I get home is I have a thought of food in my head and once that is acknowledged my hunger switch is turned on and the mind g... Wed, 9 Apr 2014 09:15:09 EST 100% during workouts?? How many of us give 100% during our workouts? How many of us even know what that means? Honestly I would have to exclude myself from that first question. <BR> <BR> I always thought just showing up and working out meant that I was doing 100%. I would get ready to do my work out but I would be like “ugh let’s just get this over with so I can watch TV”. Seriously! So then I would start my work out and just hurry though each set and I would wonder the next day why I am not sore. I would mention... Tue, 8 Apr 2014 09:48:03 EST What does being healthy mean??? What does being healthy mean to you? <BR> <BR> Well to me, being healthy is feeling great about yourself from the inside and out. It’s about having energy and taking the time to care for your body so that you can care for yourself and others. <BR> <BR> To me, being healthy is not giving up the foods you love. Who wants to live without chocolate cake?? LOL. Being healthy is learning to enjoy those favorite foods in moderation and learning that if you do slip up and binge that you can learn... Mon, 7 Apr 2014 10:33:43 EST Challenge myself We'll I'm right back where I don't want to be. It's rediculous because I told myself I would never get back into the 200s again no matter what. And what happened? I back there again. Barely but I'm there. Changes need to be made because obviously I can't do this alone. What am I going to change??? <BR> <BR> 1) I'm working with my personal trainer again. She's a great motivator and I'm going to commit to every other day and really knock out my workouts. <BR> <BR> 2) I started spark coach a... Sun, 6 Apr 2014 09:08:56 EST HORRIBLE WEEK <BR> This last week has been horrible. Not only have I only worked out 1 time but my eating was off the charts! Each night when I got home from work I binged. As soon as I walked in that door the craving hit! Drives me nuts! I couldn’t figure out what my deal was. Even when doing a better eating challenge with my trainer and I slipped up I never undsterstood why. But I think I know why now. I always thought it was binge eating or compulsive eating but I don’t think that was the case. I think... Fri, 7 Mar 2014 13:32:54 EST Reevaluation Oh man I believe it is time to reevaluate. Seriously! I am not sure why I am slipping. I honestly think I am up from where I started 8 weeks ago. Not a great feeling. Especially when my original goal was to get into the 170’s! That won’t happen so now it’s time evaluate myself! <BR> <BR> What did I do good: <BR> - I stayed on track for most of the work week each week <BR> - I have kept up or mostly kept up with my workouts <BR> - Most days of the week I got all my water in <BR> - I never ga... Mon, 3 Mar 2014 11:01:17 EST Today's goals So I am really struggling to make good choices to lose weight. I guess I am just having a hard time getting/staying motivated and doing what I should to lose. I don’t get it. I think I always make the excuse that I am too tired to do anything. Even too tired to reach for a piece of fruit instead of a cookie. I know, I know, I shouldn’t have the cookies in the house but I LOVE to bake – Which I should limit to once a month. <BR> <BR> Today I am going to set 3 goals for myself. Each day I wil... Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:30:45 EST Disappointed in me I am having such a hard time. Struggling to get this eating under control. When I eat like crap I feel like crap. You would think knowing that would make me not eat the junk. Nope. It still makes me do it. Why? Because my mind goes blank and I just do it. I wish I knew how to stop it. <BR> <BR> I could read countless books on managing my eating. I learn things from those books but they don’t stick in my head. Once I read something and go on with my day, what I read has vanished. I just don’... Wed, 22 Jan 2014 10:36:35 EST S.M.A.R.T. Goals S.M.A.R.T. Goals <BR> <BR> Goal: To get to 145 by Dec 31 2014 <BR> Goal: To stay with in my 1300-1400 calorie range daily <BR> Goal: To lose 4 pant sizes by Dec 31 2014 <BR> <BR> Behavior goal: I will track every BLT each day. <BR> Behavior goal: I will Work out in the mornings Monday thru Friday for 30 minutes each <BR> Bahavior goal: I will allow myself a treat 3 days per week and no more. Mon, 20 Jan 2014 13:52:33 EST Darn sweets and cravings Why are the sweets the hardest to cut out? I just don't get it. I have every intention to do well and then bam! It all goes out the window and my mind goes blank. Its like I have this theif in my head who steals all of my eat better/workout thoughts so that when it comes time to push away a craving my mind is blank and I binge. I dont like that thief. I need to lock him up and get back to mindful eating and working out. Ugh. <BR> <BR> I tell myself over and over I don't need the sweets and... Fri, 3 Jan 2014 10:42:57 EST BLC24 Goals Wow I cannot believe I made my weight goal for BLC23! So proud of myself. <BR> <BR> Not sure what is going on with me during this break. I just cannot get the darn eating down. Hmmm..... <BR> <BR> Well here are my BLC24 goals... <BR> <BR> !) lose 10+ lbs so that I can get into the 170's. <BR> 2) Drink my 8+ glasses water daily <BR> 3) work out 5+ days a week <BR> 4) Focus more on my eating <BR> <BR> These goals will be met this round!!!! Sun, 29 Dec 2013 16:22:48 EST Eating by the clock??? So I am reading a book about over eating and something really spoke to me. <BR> <BR> The author talks about how our “skinny” friends eat anything they want and never gain a pound while those of us who are trying to lose weight are unable to do the same. The author talks about how those who diet have food on the brain nonstop and they eat because the clock tells them too. She also states that those who diet and eat a “forbidden” food think that they just messed up and might as well continue ... Mon, 2 Dec 2013 15:03:50 EST WHAT I NEED & DONT NEED - PART I Do you ever ask for help with your weight loss journey. Help like asking for motivation and help making the right choices? I know I do but most of the time people dont know how to help. I bet some of that is my fault. At some point I want people to keep the sweets away but at the same time I dont want them smacking it out of my hands and saying I shouldnt be eating that. Oh if only they knew. Half the time its the skinny people doing that. The skinny people who have never struggled with weigh... Thu, 28 Nov 2013 11:01:45 EST POSITIVE SELF TALK & INSPIRATION There are so many times where I will tell myself that I am fat or that I just cant do this. And then there are times where I tell myself that I look great, I am doing amazing , I can do this. <BR> <BR> The difference between those times is that when I talk negatively i do horrible. I dont eat right, I dont work out and I figure well it I think those things about myself then they must be true so why even bother? The negative talk really gets me down and totally derails me. But the thing abou... Tue, 26 Nov 2013 08:26:06 EST Protecting our program/journey How do you all protect your weight loss program? What I mean is do you avoid situations so that you dont over eat or have to explain why you are not eating all the food? <BR> <BR> I for one cannot avoid those situations. If I did that just to save myself from over eating I would end up locking myself up in my house and never going out. Take Thanksgiving for example. I need to learn how to eat in those situations. I cannot avoid them. If I did that I wouldnt learn to eat at big gatherings. W... Mon, 25 Nov 2013 08:26:24 EST Giving myself some wiggle room How many of us have thought of a food as forbidden? I know I have. But how many of us have felt that once we eat that "forbidden" food that we have blown it and Might as well eat what we want and start over on Monday. Monday always seems to be the magical start day doesnt it!? Maybe that is what it means to diet - especially yo-yo diet. <BR> <BR> We really shouldnt think of any food as forbidden. When we do that we set ourselves up for failure. I know I dont want to fail because I want to b... Fri, 22 Nov 2013 07:23:49 EST Day 3 - Just do it Have you ever felt like just ordering pizza instead of making a healthy meal? Or skipping your work out because you are too tired or just dont feel like putting that effort in? I think we all have been like that. I know I have. <BR> <BR> There have been many times where I didnt feel like making a healthy meal so I made hamburger helpers, pigs in a blanket, pizza, ect. And you know what some times that is ok to do (just dont go overboard on serving size). Especially when you are pressed for ... Thu, 21 Nov 2013 07:02:16 EST Day 2 - Committment! When we start a weight loss journey we need to stay committed to it. If we are constantly starting and stopping our journey then that is no better than yo-yo dieting. We need to committ to a lifestyle change in order to get to our goal.s <BR> <BR> What do we do when someone brings treats to work or when other people eat treats in front of you such as ice cream, chips, cakes, cookies, ect? Do you tell them no thank you or do you join in the crowd and eat up? Having the strength to say "no th... Wed, 20 Nov 2013 07:28:14 EST Day 1 - Changing the way we view weight loss efforts There are so many time where we approach weight loss thinking that this time will be different. But is it really? Do we have the desire this time to make the change and keep it for good to better ourselves? We all know what to do in order to lose weight but how will this time be different? How will we keep motivating ourselves to keep going when one week we show a tiny gain? Wouldnt that delrail all our motivation? Probably - but dont let it. Make this time different. <BR> <BR> We need to ch... Tue, 19 Nov 2013 07:06:28 EST So Ready for this!!!!! Today is the last day of having help with my weight loss from my Dr. I will do this on my own starting tomorrow! I am so ready for this! Im going to make myself learn so much about working out, eating right, and what not! I will start out with my 100 days of weight loss starting tomorrow morning! At the same time I plan on reading SLim for Life by Jillian Michaels. Work outs will be ampped up! Honestly I am excited for this! I will make sure I copy and paste my previous blog onto the screan o... Mon, 18 Nov 2013 08:21:47 EST One word.... Ok, using 1 word describe how you feel today and why. Ready? Go! <BR> <BR> Empowered <BR> <BR> I feel empowered because I have been making the right food and fitness choices and do you want to know what is even better???? I got to go shopping for pants that actually fit! And in the JRs department!!! I have waited for years to buy pants in the Jrs dept and now I can. Knowing I can do this know makes me feel that nothing will stop me from getting to my goal. <BR> <BR> Last month I finally ... Fri, 15 Nov 2013 17:02:51 EST Going off the meds So a while back my doctor put me on meds to help kick start my weight loss. I finally started to lose weight and keep it off. I have learned allot while on the meds as well. I really started focusing on fitness and nutrition and how my body works and what is my magic number to consume for calories. While I have learned all this I am still a bit worried. <BR> <BR> Why am I worried? I am so afraid I will gain weight once I go off. Yes I know that the people who usually gain the weight are the... Tue, 12 Nov 2013 14:14:49 EST My holiday eating plan So I started to think about what I will do once the holidays roll around. You got food, baking, gatherings, food, more baking and did I mention FOOD??!! Ugh. <BR> <BR> I am not going to let this season deter me from my goals. I have come so far to go back. Almost to a 30 lb loss and I will NOT go above 200 ever again. I am going to be smart this holiday season and every holiday season after. How you ask? <BR> <BR> Well with Thanksgiving right around the corner I plan on filling up on veggi... Mon, 11 Nov 2013 14:11:13 EST BLC 23 Goals So I have been thinking about my plan of attack for the next 9 weeks for BLC and for the long run. I do know I need to do something different to really keep consistent at weight loss. I need to make some changes in how I eat and how I work out. But mostly with how I eat. <BR> <BR> I need to make smarter choices when it comes to nutrition. I need to learn what is going to fuel my body for the long haul and what is going to burn fat. I also need to make smarter choices when it comes to fitnes... Mon, 14 Oct 2013 09:48:11 EST Calories in VS Calories out QUESTION???? Ok so here is my question. <BR> <BR> So I have been thinking of the calories in vs calories out since our last BLC challenge. Now I know 3500 calories = 1 lb and that to lose 1 lb a week you should cut 500 calories a day. Now what I don’t know is if that is strictly a deficit caused by your daily calorie intake range minus the food you eat plus the work out calories you earn or is that deficit caused by your daily BMR minus the food you eat plus the work out calories you earn? How is the 50... Tue, 8 Oct 2013 15:07:45 EST Fitness Goals We all have goals for weight loss. Some goals may be an amount of weight to lose, some are to eat with in our calorie range or to give up certian foods and some have fitness goals. <BR> <BR> Right now I am struggling with a fitness goal that I want to accomplish. I would like to get up at 4 am 4x a week to walk/jog on my treadmill. So far its not working like I would like it to. I keep making excuses to hit the snooze. Either little man is sleeping with me - which is every night, Im too tir... Tue, 1 Oct 2013 07:29:24 EST Phentermine.....getting frustrated So my doctor put me on phentermine at the beginning of august. I lost about 13 lbs in 5 weeks. Now I know many people would love that its just that I am getting discouraged. Its suppose to help with cravings and appetite. Well it doesnt seem to be working for me as well as it does other people. Most people lose 30+ lbs in 3 months with this suff. <BR> <BR> This last week I lost only0.6. I know its still a loss but what gets me wondering is Ok im on these meds that are suppose to increase th... Wed, 18 Sep 2013 08:25:42 EST Eating when not hungry So we have always been told that we should only eat when we are hungry. When we have true hunger. Well we are also told that we should eat 5 small meals/snacks each day. Well what if we are not hungry??? <BR> <BR> I have been programmed to eat breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner. But allot of the time when its time for my snack im not too hungry. Do I really need to eat? Maybe that is what is keeping me from losing consistanly. I guess I am not sure what I should be doing. <BR> <BR> T... Tue, 27 Aug 2013 08:23:18 EST fighting the binge It has been so hard for me to ignore a binge. Everyone always says to keep yourself busy and your mind away from food. That was always hard for me. I always gave in to that little voice in my head. Well now I don't have cravings because of my medication and I'm able to talkmyself out of it. But there are some thing I could do to stop a binger. <BR> <BR> 1. Read <BR> 2. Play with the kids <BR> 3. Walk <BR> 4. Workout <BR> 5. Crafts <BR> 6. Clean <BR> <BR> I need to keep this all in mind ne... Fri, 23 Aug 2013 08:26:58 EST I know I have had a great workout when. ... I know when I have a great work out. Either I'm sweaty or I can finish the whole thing with out wanting to give up. I also know its a great workout when I can push myself and feel amazing afterwards. <BR> <BR> How do you know when you have had a great workout? Thu, 22 Aug 2013 09:29:18 EST :( That about sums it up. So much is going on in life right now that I don’t even know where to begin or how to take time to relax. <BR> <BR> I cannot believe that last week my 10 year old took a puff of a cigarette. I was so upset with him. I know we have all done it but still. I was never that angry at him as I was then. Maybe its just the emotions of everything that is going on. I don’t know. He is 10 years old and super hard to trust. I cannot leave him alone for 20 minutes with out him getting into anything. I ... Tue, 23 Jul 2013 13:01:36 EST This craziness needs to stop!!! Man I feel like I have been M.I.A. lately. Life has certainly been crazy. So much going on. I hope it all gets back to normal soon. I suppose it will once we have moved, unpacked, and cleaned the place we are moving from1 <BR> <BR> There is also so much I have been dealing with. #1 Jordan’s separation anxiety. In order for him or I to get any sleep he has been in my bed. Now I don’t mind that except that I miss my time to get stuff done when he goes to bed. I hope to start fresh at the new p... Mon, 8 Jul 2013 14:29:57 EST Life help needed... So the last 2 weeks or so I have been L.A.Z.Y.!!!! I wish I could just over come this. Im sure its exhaustion of a clingy baby and the lack of sleep I get. I used to work out 2x a week. Now working out I mean strength train or use my treadmill. I have gotten some form of walking in most days but to me that is not enough. I don’t see walking really as working out but more me time since I don’t get any me time. <BR> <BR> I told my trainer that I would have to stop her program since we are mov... Thu, 20 Jun 2013 08:58:30 EST Really disappointed in myself Well today at WI I am up 3.6 lbs. I know I should have expected it after uncontrollable eating but boy was it a shocker. Its really making me sad. I feel like I have failed and let my team down. <BR> <BR> You really cannot work out and eat what you want. You really do have to do both. <BR> <BR> My eating has gotten out of control since the grad party. My family also sent some food home. Well last night I got sick of all the junk laying around my house from the party. I tossed the bars and... Wed, 12 Jun 2013 07:15:51 EST