BANKHOLIDAY's SparkPeople Blog BANKHOLIDAY's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community January 24 In between graduation (December 20) and New Year's Day I ate pretty awfully. I got back on track, and have been on track since, but things aren't really working. <BR> <BR> I have been eating well lately, but my scale keeps going up. Like, not even staying the same, but actually going up. It's really discouraging, even though I know that I should just keep eating well and exercise more and things will level out. Fri, 24 Jan 2014 12:45:42 EST October 1/Challenge blog I'm participating in a fall challenge with one of the Sparkteams I belong to, and this week's challenge was to write a blog post about my goals. <BR> <BR> I would like to make exercise a bigger part of my life. I have been doing well at eating better and keeping my emotional eating in check, but I would love to have exercise come that easy to me as well. <BR> <BR> I would like to be kinder to myself. <BR> <BR> I would like to manage my time better. I have a lot of schoolwork that I leave u... Wed, 2 Oct 2013 00:35:16 EST September 9/Rewards I'm feeling a bit unmotivated lately, so I think I'm going to set some rewards that I can earn when I meet certain weight loss goals. <BR> <BR> 230: Relaxing at home spa night <BR> 220: Pedicure <BR> 210: $30 on makeup <BR> 200: Massage <BR> 190: Facial <BR> 180 (ultimate goal): $50 on makeup <BR> <BR> I don't want to spend too much money, even though these goals won't be reached within like, a week of each other, so the pedicure, massage, and facial I will get at a beauty school, which is ... Mon, 9 Sep 2013 23:04:31 EST September 5 I ate too much today. Knowingly. <BR> <BR> I had a bagel and cream cheese for breakfast on my way to class this morning, which wasn't too bad. I had class all day, and didn't eat anything until I got home. I'm finally able to eat real food again after my tonsillitis, so I was excited to eat real food, and I went overboard. I was super hungry because I hadn't eaten between 10:30am and 6:30pm, so I went to Raising Cane's and got two combo orders. I'm not sure why. I regret it now, but there is... Thu, 5 Sep 2013 21:58:59 EST August 31 My throat mostly feels better, but I'm still sick. I haven't eaten anything that requires chewing in a week, and I am so sick of soft foods! I'm still weak, mostly because I haven't been eating/drinking enough, but I can't get anything down and have no appetite. It's a vicious cycle. Sat, 31 Aug 2013 20:33:03 EST August 27 I've been sick for a few days and found out today it's tonsillitis. I got penicillin, which is good, so hopefully I'll feel better soon. I haven't been working out, but I also haven't really been eating. That has shown a loss on the scale, but it's a "bad" loss--which is what I consider a loss from being sick. It's more likely to come back after I start eating real food again, and honestly I'd much rather have stayed at the same weight as last week than been this sick. Tue, 27 Aug 2013 21:37:52 EST August 15 I'm feeling a bit defeated today. I've eaten well, the scale is going in the right direction, I just am feeling defeated. Like this is all too much, it's too hard, it won't work, I'll give up again. I have put in a lot of hard work and I can't even tell a change in my body. I have lost weight, according to the scale, but I can't see it. I am exercising, but I can't really tell in the way my clothes fit (they might be a bit looser, but not enough to go down in sizes). It's just so daunting. Thu, 15 Aug 2013 22:05:33 EST Challenge Recap/August 2 As this summer challenge winds down, I've found myself pretty pleased with my progress. I have lost some weight, exercised plenty, and ate well. I've drank enough water the vast majority of the days. Of course, there were times when I didn't stick to my plan, but those were fairly rare, and usually for good reason (I went to visit my best friend for her birthday, and I celebrated my own birthday during this challenge) so I don't feel any guilt for not sticking to plan. I have been working wit... Fri, 2 Aug 2013 20:26:53 EST July 10 I have had absolutely no motivation to exercise lately. I know it makes me feel better, I know it's important, and I know that I want to become fitter, but I still can't get myself to exercise as much as I should. I've been eating fairly decently, but the scale isn't moving (and is in fact going up slightly) which makes me realize that I NEED to exercise. Wed, 10 Jul 2013 23:56:34 EST July 8/Accountability I'm participating in a challenge with one of my SparkTeams, and this week's non-fitness challenge was to write a blog post about how we're doing so far in this challenge, with fitness, nutrition, tracking, etc. <BR> <BR> I think I have done well for the most part. When I was on my trip I didn't track anything (I didn't have computer access and it was hard to track on my phone...and honestly, I was on vacation and not thinking about it). Every other day I have tracked, though. Some days (like... Tue, 9 Jul 2013 00:22:13 EST July 5 Today was fine. I exercised, I ate within my calories but towards the mid-high end (unlike the low end, like I normally do). Hopefully I'll see some movement on the scale soon! Sat, 6 Jul 2013 00:15:41 EST July 4 I have been eating at the bottom of my calorie range, and I think I might need to mix it up and eat at the higher end. I haven't seen too much change on the scale lately, and I might actually be eating too little. I don't know, but I'll try to mix it up. Has anyone tried that and seen results? Thu, 4 Jul 2013 22:12:41 EST July 2 Today was pretty good. I felt a bit weird emotionally but didn't let that affect my eating. I didn't want to exercise today, but I managed to get off my butt and do it anyway, and I feel a lot better. Tue, 2 Jul 2013 22:36:00 EST July 1 I met with my nutritionist today. Talking to her about the emotions I tie into food is really hard. It's super important, and I know it's good for me to be doing this, but it takes a lot out of me emotionally. I haven't updated my blog in a few days, but for the most part I have been doing well. I didn't eat very well when I was on my trip, but I walked a lot, and didn't end up gaining weight. I did eat emotionally a bit, or maybe it was more of a binge, but I was able to really keep that in ... Mon, 1 Jul 2013 23:19:49 EST June 20 Today was fine in terms of eating and emotions. <BR> <BR> I'm leaving in the morning for a quick vacation, and I'm hoping to stay active and not eat too bad. I know I'll be drinking a lot, so I need to be extra watchful about my food intake. Fri, 21 Jun 2013 00:16:51 EST June 19 Today was pretty decent. I ate within my requirements, drank a lot of water, and hung out with one of my friends and her 1 year old son. We went on a walk, which was nice. I probably drank too much Diet Pepsi but oh well. <BR> <BR> I am part of a challenge in one of my SparkTeams, and part of this week's challenge is to post a blog entry about our goals. I'm just going to kill two birds with one stone and do that here. <BR> <BR> 1. I want to be in better shape. I want to be able to walk aro... Wed, 19 Jun 2013 23:24:18 EST June 18 I had a bit of an emotional hangover today. Going to the nutritionist yesterday affected me a lot, and I have some other stuff going on that is bumming me out. I was supposed to go to yoga, but I didn't feel up to it and instead took a nap. I'm going to go on a walk in a little while, though. <BR> <BR> This morning I just didn't see the point in continuing on this journey. I have always had a problem feeling as though I have any worth. I never feel like I am worthy of taking care of, and I ... Tue, 18 Jun 2013 22:43:19 EST June 17 Today I went to see a nutritionist, and I started to cry. It's going to be tough to get my emotional eating under control. I eat because I'm trying to fill a void, but the void can't be filled with food. I just don't know what the void can be filled with, or if it even can be filled. Maybe people are just supposed to live with voids. Mon, 17 Jun 2013 21:22:30 EST June 16 I barely made it through yoga today (actually, I did have to leave the room, so maybe "barely" is being nice). I just couldn't take the heat today. Oh well, I still tried. <BR> <BR> I ate a really big dinner, but stayed within my calories and other nutrition goals, so it's okay. Sun, 16 Jun 2013 22:30:12 EST June 15 Was a bit bummed out today but managed to stay within my calories, drink a lot of water, and exercise (went on a walk for half an hour, rode the stationary bike for half an hour). Sun, 16 Jun 2013 01:12:38 EST June 14 Today was good. I felt a little down emotionally but didn't let that affect my eating. Fri, 14 Jun 2013 22:21:07 EST June 13 I did Bikram yoga again today, so I had no trouble getting enough water in. This time went better than the last, I was actually able to stay in the room the entire time! I couldn't do all of the poses but I tried my best. I think I'll try it again. <BR> <BR> I might have a few drinks tonight, so I'm trying to plan my food accordingly. Seeing as that I couldn't eat before yoga, I haven't had enough calories yet. Thu, 13 Jun 2013 21:51:19 EST June 12 A lot of my calories today came from beer. I am glad, though, that I still managed to track them and to stay within my calories. Wed, 12 Jun 2013 22:06:21 EST June 11 I did Bikram yoga today and felt like I was going to pass out! I had to leave the room for a little bit but I went back in and was proud of myself. Because of that I haven't eaten much today. I'm eating a big salad now but still have a lot of calories left. Tue, 11 Jun 2013 20:51:11 EST June 10 Emotions all over the place. <BR> <BR> EDIT: <BR> <BR> While my emotions were all over the place today, I did manage to exercise, eat within my calories, drink a lot of water, and otherwise take care of myself. Mon, 10 Jun 2013 16:06:21 EST June 9 Ate well today, though could have used more fruits/vegetables. Emotions are under control. Sun, 9 Jun 2013 21:22:37 EST June 8 I'M SO HUNGRY today!! Drinking water, eating within my calories, but I'm still really hungry. I don't know if it's true hunger or I want to eat because I'm emotional...I've had a bad week emotionally and while it's getting better (I think? I hope?), it's still not great. Sat, 8 Jun 2013 18:14:13 EST June 7 Still feeling slightly drained, emotionally, but able to keep my eating under control. I have been really hungry all day though, which is annoying as I have had the upper limit of my calories today and have eaten plenty of fats and proteins. Fri, 7 Jun 2013 21:08:42 EST June 6 After having an awful day yesterday, mostly emotion-wise, I am feeling ok today. Still a bit disjointed and out of it. Have been eating well and drinking water. Thu, 6 Jun 2013 21:07:21 EST