ANGIEMUNSON's SparkPeople Blog ANGIEMUNSON's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community why I need to understand why when i eat one thing off my plan of eating i just say hell with it lets eat like a pig...So mad at myself, and so stressed out with life...but I will not give up and i will continue to write about my struggles until i get it. Thu, 11 Oct 2012 22:56:02 EST For Today So today was a very bad stress day for me at work i feel very under appreciated, my husbands van broke down and now we have to share a car. I was hoping to find a new job, because right now my husband is in school and not working and my job has made some cuts, now that can't happen. SO I felt very upset, very disused with how my life was going, self pity and on and on. However today I did not over eat, I wanted to but i didn't. I kept my eye on the big picture that was a huge thing for me as ... Tue, 9 Oct 2012 00:32:21 EST Dreams Picture five things you want in your life, whether they are people, goals, experiences or things. How will reaching your small goals today help you achieve those dreams, too? <BR> <BR> 1. I want to have a baby <BR> 2. I want to be free for medical issues <BR> 3. I want to walk a 5k <BR> 4. I want to fit into all table, booths, rides ect <BR> 5. I want to feel peace <BR> <BR> By sticking with my small goals and adding to them will help me see that i'm worth it in the long wrong. Mon, 8 Oct 2012 01:27:30 EST OA Went back to OA today its so nice to hear people talk about the same struggles that i have it makes me feel that maybe i'm not crazy or there isn't something wrong with me, its a disease. I'm committed to working this OA plan this time, I'm going to get a sponsor, work the steps and really do it for myself. I find myself saying oh its too much time away from my husband and or i'm so tired cause i work all the time. This time its for me. Sat, 6 Oct 2012 13:07:42 EST Reality So a month ago I was travelling around Seattle area for a few weeks, in a car and developed superficial blood clots. I was told many things like they wont go deep vain, then told they could in someone my size and so on and so on. I came home saw my doctor who told me "I pissed of my system" whatever that is suppose to mean. So hear i am over a month later and i'm still no farther than I was when they first happened. I did see a surgery whom told me that in 14 years I would be dead from weight... Thu, 3 May 2012 12:00:22 EST