AMBERZADE67's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=AMBERZADE67 AMBERZADE67's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ I Have a New Rule http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5628272 Yesterday I spent nearly every waking moment on the phone with one customer service rep or another. I'm not exaggerating. I started at 8:30am and ended at 9:00pm. <BR> <BR> I did this while driving to appointments. Still, it was not an easy or relaxing thing at all. <BR> <BR> My new rule is that there is nothing that is important enough for me to be making calls to customer service reps of any kind on my day off. I will not get involved in trying to get every little issue resolved o... Wed, 19 Feb 2014 11:24:01 EST Life is Good http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5627121 I sometimes wonder if I have that SAD. Now that it's not so cold I feel like dancing around a forest with the woodland creatures. <BR> <BR> However, there are other, less far fetched, explanations for my elevated mood. <BR> <BR> My work is not offering overtime right now. This means that I have been working 40 hours like a normal person. It's very nice. <BR> <BR> On Morning Joe this morning they were discussing whether the money Obama pumped into the economy did any good. One of th... Tue, 18 Feb 2014 08:12:49 EST BEGIN AGAIN http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5624727 How many times am I going to keep coming back ? ? ? <BR> <BR> As many as it takes. <BR> <BR> MY WEIGHT WATCHERS BLOG: <BR> <BR> I keep trying to come back to Weight Watchers and begin again but I've had several false starts. But my WW leader tells me that we can always begin again. So, here I am again. <BR> <BR> I know that a lot of people feel shame when they overeat. I have to admit I don't feel the shame as I'm overeating and I don't beat myself up for eating a chocolate bar. <BR> <B... Sat, 15 Feb 2014 12:01:09 EST What I did on vacation..... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5589866 Apparently I gained weight. <BR> <BR> I went to exercise class every day. Once I went twice a day. I still gained 7 pounds this week. <BR> <BR> How is that even POSSIBLE? <BR> <BR> Now granted, I ate whatever I wanted but I do not think that I ate an extra 3600 or whatever it is calories a day. <BR> <BR> I suppose if I can lose 7 pounds in a week I can gain it. <BR> <BR> Whatever. Onward. Sat, 11 Jan 2014 05:39:55 EST Things I Learned in 2013 - Part B http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5580189 I started vacation on Tuesday and didn't really visit Sparkpeople until today. Which was when I saw that I did a post that said PART A. Well, what's a Part A without a Part B. I'm sure I learned more in 2013. I will have to try not to repeat myself. <BR> <BR> This is one of the most important things I have learned. <BR> <BR> "Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you." <BR>... Fri, 3 Jan 2014 00:00:34 EST Things I Learned in 2013 - Part A http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5569991 I have long since stopped thinking of sparkpeople as a weight loss website. I really think of it as a life skills website. So, forgive me if many of these don't have anything to do with weight loss. <BR> <BR> 1 - Planning and lists, are a way of dreaming. I try not to expect everything to go as planned or for everything on a list to be completed. That road leads to perfectionism which leads to guilt and which often leads to giving up altogether. There are times when I don't even have t... Sun, 22 Dec 2013 17:28:05 EST AH - The Weigh In http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5569120 My blood glucose level was 220 this morning. It has never been that high. <BR> <BR> Was it the bottle of wine I drank last night? <BR> <BR> Also, it wasn't fasting blood glucose. I'd only had 4 hoursof sleep. But, it's never been that high. <BR> <BR> So, today with my blood glucose level fresh in my mind, I am going to go weigh in. I am thinking .... 245. <BR> <BR> Then a friend from bookclub bought me 15 jazzercise classes at the zumba studio we go to. Wasn't that nice? It was... Sat, 21 Dec 2013 06:47:33 EST What is my fat made of? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5557427 I eat so that I don't have to be present. I eat so that I can numb. I've eaten in frustration. I've eaten because I'm sad or anxious. I've eaten as reward or celebration. I've eaten because I feel sorry for myself. At the end of the day, happy or sad, what it amounts to is not being present for my emotional or feeling life. <BR> <BR> I look at times where I don't exercise, or spend time moving every day, as times of hibernation. For me at least, this isn't any different than eating t... Thu, 5 Dec 2013 08:40:51 EST Still kind of reeling ....... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5556505 Yesterday was a weird day. <BR> <BR> This is what I had planned: <BR> <BR> Overtime <BR> A computer lesson at my Dad's <BR> My therapist <BR> A break where I could relax and get ready for .... <BR> Bookclub Christmas party <BR> <BR> This is what happened: <BR> <BR> Overtime <BR> <BR> I owed my therapist for a few weeks and wanted to catch up, not really because she was demanding it, but because I wanted to. So, I came up with the idea of selling my wedding ring, 2 baby bangles, and a... Wed, 4 Dec 2013 05:46:37 EST Kind of PO'ed http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5555465 I swear if my Father suggests one more time that my son take more than 12 units next semester I may arm myself with more than words. <BR> <BR> I keep explaining to my father that my son is taking 12 units. 12 units is full time. I keep telling him most people take 12 units. <BR> <BR> He keeps grumbling and then he'll wait a while and bring it up AGAIN. <BR> <BR> Now. I put up with this BS for my ENTIRE LIFE. I sometimes think my lack of achievement is my version of over achievement.... Mon, 2 Dec 2013 22:10:32 EST Stillness http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5553719 Hi, <BR> <BR> I haven't been online. I made a decision to only be online for an hour a day and I really haven't been online even that much. <BR> <BR> For the rest of this year I am doing an overtime binge next week and finishing up school. Then it's time for Christmas, New Years, and my birthday - New Years Eve. <BR> <BR> This week I have been spending time with my son, which I enjoy very much. <BR> <BR> However, and this may seem odd to some, my goal in the new year is to turn ... Sat, 30 Nov 2013 21:26:34 EST Holidays On the Horizon http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5544966 I'm getting everyone socks for Christmas. I'm not kidding. I think socks are the perfect gift for the season. They say, "I wish you comfort and the joy of small pleasures for the rest of your life." <BR> <BR> I may even put that on a card. <BR> <BR> Over and over again it seems I go up up up and then down down down. <BR> <BR> No, I'm not manic. That's a whole other topic but I truly despise the way psychiatrists have made certain mental illnesses common. <BR> <BR> Ups and downs ar... Tue, 19 Nov 2013 07:20:22 EST Today IS Another Day (1) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5534128 Part of what is interesting about Scarlett O'Hara is that she was neither a heroine or a villain. She wasn't on the side of good or bad. She was on Scarlett's side. Emphatically so. <BR> <BR> I think her most misunderstood line is, 'Tomorrow is another day.' <BR> <BR> Of course, 'I'll do it tomorrow' is the procrastinators refrain. <BR> <BR> But that isn't what Scarlett did. Scarlett got up the next day and addressed whatever was most pressing. <BR> <BR> To help myself get back o... Wed, 6 Nov 2013 17:06:16 EST How many chances do I deserve? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5531844 Sometimes in an attempt to teach my son boundaries I will tell him, 'This is your last chance'. <BR> <BR> Things come out of my mouth as a parent that I often don't have time to contemplate. <BR> <BR> I also say these words to myself. I pretty much think that I am acting with a lack of integrity if I keep saying I am going to do something and don't do it. Or, if I intend to do something and then turn around and do something else entirely. <BR> <BR> While the need for boundaries is a... Mon, 4 Nov 2013 11:11:49 EST Looking Into the Shining World http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5522281 "Why should I not sit, every morning of my life, on the hillside, looking into the shining world?" ~ Mary Oliver <BR> <BR> Isn't that lovely? I will have to read some of her poetry. <BR> <BR> So, this morning I meant to go over to my Brothers to workout. I usually confirm the night before but I didn't this time. <BR> <BR> Still, he seemed to know I meant to workout today because he messaged me to tell me that I was a no show. I decided to sleep in. <BR> <BR> I considered showing... Thu, 24 Oct 2013 12:26:11 EST Pictures of Me From When I Was Young and Fat http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5521219 I don't have very many pictures of myself at all. If anyone does, it would be my Father but I haven't checked recently. I know he is always asking for current pictures. <BR> <BR> However, this weekend I opened my red box. I have been carrying this red box around with me since I first left home. It has a lock on it, which at the time was very important because my Mother would read my diaries. Actually, she read them out loud, as I was held back, crying and screaming. <BR> <BR> In my... Wed, 23 Oct 2013 10:57:04 EST Rockin' & Rollin' http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5516691 I am feeling GOOD this morning! <BR> <BR> I stopped the overtime (most of it) nearly a week ago. I called it a vacation and although I am still working and working more than 40 hours a week, it feels like a vacation. <BR> <BR> I have had time inGoals the morning to get ready for the day and get my head screwed on straight. I've had time to exercise. <BR> <BR> I've been enjoying the October light, which really is something special, and watching the birds outside my window. My cats s... Fri, 18 Oct 2013 07:25:20 EST How Do You Know How You Feel? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5512676 This seems like a simple question on the surface. I thought I'd long since given myself permission to feel any and every sort of human feeling imaginable. <BR> <BR> My theory has always been that if I feeling is recognized it could be handled. So, if it was a small and mean feeling that was obviously beneath me, I would just let it go. Or, if it was a feeling that led to a deeper understanding of an issue, then recognizing it would give me additional information. <BR> <BR> My emotion... Sun, 13 Oct 2013 21:48:36 EST Me and Ingrid Bergman http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5509505 Yes, it is 3am and I am awake. Howeer, I got 6 hours of sleep and that is 1 - 2 more than I am used to getting. <BR> <BR> I ended up emailing my Father and telling him that we will never speak about our 'discussion' again. I told him that if we were to maintain a harmonious relationship that I was not interested in pursuing a conversation on God and the Catholic Church. <BR> <BR> In fact, I emailed him and a few other people and told them that I was on vacation until further notice and no... Thu, 10 Oct 2013 04:09:11 EST I'm Refocusing http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5508493 I can't work overtime for a little bit. I'm so tired I can barely function. So, it's time for a break. <BR> <BR> My first break started this morning. I didn't have to be at work at 6am so I went to my Brother's and worked out. That was a lot of fun. <BR> <BR> My next break was that I only worked til 2pm. <BR> <BR> Poor trusting, unsuspecting little me. I jumped in my car and drove to my Father's to give him a computer lesson. He was sitting in the living room eating M&Ms. Which, h... Wed, 9 Oct 2013 00:01:37 EST Where Has the Time Gone? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5500860 I have been so out of touch that for the first time since I got my bodymedia monitor, it ran out of juice. I don't even remember the last time I checked in, or logged what I ate, or even exercised. <BR> <BR> The biggest thing that took up my time was revising 3 chapters of a book I haven't finished to submit to a writing contest. <BR> <BR> It's really my Brother's fault. When me and my friend were meeting to go over our writing, and I didn't have any writing, he said, 'Amber could write... Mon, 30 Sep 2013 23:25:23 EST A Laundry List of Thoughts http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5493264 The Yonana is a wonderful healthy ice cream making machine. I might buy one for everyone i know at Christmas. <BR> <BR> I might have a depression issue again. *sigh* what a bore.... <BR> <BR> Beat the Blues is a good book. You can look up the thought you're having and read about it. Depression is essentially a series of negative thoughts - false assumptions - that perpetuate themselves. <BR> <BR> The Merry Widow is not a very good ballet. If there isn't any witty banter .... do we r... Sun, 22 Sep 2013 23:12:28 EST Good and Bad http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5492150 It's been a long week of ups and downs - good things and not so good things - sucesses and failures. <BR> <BR> So -I am resting. <BR> <BR> I'm going to start working out with my brother next week. He has an elliptical. Out of all of the stationery exercise machines I think elliptical is the most fun. He is going to show me how to use his weight lifting machine too. So I am going to start doing that 3 days a week. <BR> <BR> Today starts a new month at work. New starts are always good... Sat, 21 Sep 2013 18:36:00 EST I want to play! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5484356 I have all day off tomorrow. <BR> <BR> I am going to speak for a minute at Weight Watchers. I am pretty excited about it. I know it's pretty silly but I was really flattered to be asked to do it. <BR> <BR> Then I am going to a writers group meeting and meeting a friend there. That should be fun. <BR> <BR> Then I have homework which should also be enjoyable or at least relaxing. <BR> <BR> Sunday I only work 4 hours. <BR> <BR> I am working on a story to submit to a contest and ... Fri, 13 Sep 2013 08:21:48 EST Coooooooooool http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5479102 I lost 5 of the pounds I gained over the summer. Yay. <BR> <BR> My Weight Watchers leader asked me if I wanted to talk during their Believe & Succeed week next week. I think I will. That should be kind of fun. <BR> <BR> I worked for a few hours. <BR> <BR> I went and saw Riddick. It was terrible. <BR> <BR> I have been watching Columbo. I love Columbo. I'm getting old. There are probably people who don't know who Columbo is. <BR> <BR> I studied a lot. <BR> <BR> Now it's time t... Sat, 7 Sep 2013 23:49:22 EST Interesting Week http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5477270 An online course at a 4 year University is a lot more demanding than an online class at a community college. I'm a little skeeeered, . LOL <BR> <BR> My Brother is staying here for a few weeks. He has financed a dyson vacuum and a blu-ray for my living room for me. He also managed to make my son's bedroom hospitable. <BR> <BR> That last part is just a little strange. It's truly a reflection of different head spaces. <BR> <BR> Work has been okay. There are lots of good things that h... Thu, 5 Sep 2013 23:07:51 EST I Had a Great Weekend http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5473504 I worked 13 hours this weekend but I still managed to relax and have a good time. I watched Breaking Bad with my Brother who is staying her for a bit. I did some studying. I watched some good documentaries. I cooked a little bit. I got plenty of exercise and really just had a great weekend. <BR> <BR> Now, it's really a mystery to me why my son's presence messes my head up so much and gets me so off track. It's certainly not his fault. <BR> <BR> But, I am back on track and I will dea... Mon, 2 Sep 2013 12:41:36 EST I'm So Awesome http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5472121 Today, instead of people telling me that I am 'no good' people are telling me that I am wonderful. I am a magician. I am a miracle worker. <BR> <BR> I can roll with that. <BR> <BR> I complain a lot about my job. I complain because there is some real crazy stuff that happens and sometimes it just so happens that people will be hateful all day long. Listening to hate all day long can get to you. <BR> <BR> Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeup. <BR> <BR> There are many many reasons I don't look fo... Sat, 31 Aug 2013 23:12:39 EST The Day After http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5471133 I'm not at work now. I called in sick. <BR> <BR> I am diabetic. I started losing weight immediately after being diagnosed. I experienced immediate and satisfying results. I saw my blood glucose go down when I stopped eating sugar, stopped eating processed rice and bread, and started exercising. I also had more energy and all the other blessings of eating right and exercising. <BR> <BR> Recently, I have been discounting my diabetes. In May when I saw the doctor he said that my diab... Fri, 30 Aug 2013 19:25:14 EST Tonight I Chose Numbing Poison http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5470382 The day started well enough. I did some Zumba. I jogged with my doggie. <BR> <BR> Then I discovered that the gardener cut my fairy lights. Again. <BR> <BR> Okay. I'll order a new set. For the third time, I will order a set of fairy lights. <BR> <BR> I sure love those fairy lights. <BR> <BR> Then during my first break I couldn't get my workout dvd to work. So, I didn't workout. <BR> <BR> Fine. Fine. I will have plenty of other opportunities to exercise during the day. <BR... Thu, 29 Aug 2013 22:54:32 EST Zumba & Jogging & Circuit Training & Yoga .... OH MY! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5469282 Yes, I did all of those things today and I zumba'ed more than once. LOL <BR> <BR> I didn't do them for long periods of time but, I did them. <BR> <BR> I was trying out the workouts on gaiamtv. Gaiamtv probably has over 200 exercise videos. It says yoga when you look at it but it has so much more than yoga. It has weight lifting and circuit training and cardio and ... well pretty much everything. <BR> <BR> They don't have Zumba. I think that has something to do with Zumba's tradema... Wed, 28 Aug 2013 20:57:23 EST Ahhhh........... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5468276 I am watching a documentary on gaiamtv called The Mythic Journey. I love this documentary and I love gaiamtv. I love both of them because it is just so wonderful to see and hear to people talking about what I already believe in my heart and in my soul. <BR> <BR> I'm not talking about something I know quantitatively. It is more qualitative even though they are things I know through my own experience. <BR> <BR> If someone was to ask me what my life was about, what the meaning of life was f... Tue, 27 Aug 2013 21:39:44 EST Welcome to Fall..... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5466187 Officially, the first day of fall is 9/22/13 @ 3:44pm CST. I say, close enough. I'm ready for fall. It's been too hot to live and I can't wait for a little bit of cool air. <BR> <BR> Besides, tomorrow school starts which is just as good a time as any to declare the beginning of fall. <BR> <BR> Fall is a time when the world starts to let go of the old so that something new can be started. I don't have to wait for the leaves to turn or for the leaves to fall off of the trees. I can tel... Sun, 25 Aug 2013 22:04:10 EST Wow .... Vacation is kind of awesome ..... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5460388 My son and I have been kicking back the last few days. It's been very nice. We've watched some movies. I started 2 new series, 1 called 'Fringe' and another called 'The White Queen'. <BR> <BR> The first is a sci-fi sort of suspense thriller that I had to just turn away from earlier today. It was bringing me down. <BR> <BR> However, it is very good. I will watch more later. <BR> <BR> 'The White Queen' is an adaptation of Philippa Gregory's novel(s). It's really good. I really love... Mon, 19 Aug 2013 21:38:05 EST Ha! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5456911 In my status this morning I wrote: <BR> <BR> 'Having a great last day before vacation!' <BR> <BR> I wrote this even though it really hasn't been a great day and it's early early yet. <BR> <BR> I got up this morning and did a little zumba. I did a little jog. <BR> <BR> Then I became very angry at my son. I don't care to explain why. I just don't care. Let's just say he has put all his game consoles into the garage. <BR> <BR> I also don't care that he's almost 21 and it might s... Fri, 16 Aug 2013 08:17:11 EST Endorphins!! Yahoo!!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5456531 First of all, please understand that this is written under the influence of a really awesome endorphin high. <BR> <BR> I went to a live zumba class for the first time since June. It was awesome. I feel so good right now. An endorphin high is better than just about anything in the world and yes that includes sex. When I left class tonight I felt as though nothing could go wrong. I'd forgotten all my stress. I'd forgotten all my worries. <BR> <BR> I have tried numerous things during t... Thu, 15 Aug 2013 20:41:53 EST Magazine Morning http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5455038 I almost as much of a magazine junkie as I am a book junkie. So, I have a lot of unread magazines. I'm taking the morning to go through some of them. <BR> <BR> This is what I am taking away from them this morning: <BR> <BR> WEIGHT WATCHERS SEPT/OCT 2013 <BR> <BR> This issue was actually pretty good. Usually, Weight Watchers is okay. But this issue ..... <BR> <BR> - a section about how water content in food effects weight loss. The more water, the better. <BR> <BR> - An article a... Wed, 14 Aug 2013 12:04:36 EST Really? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5452821 The summer is almost over and although I have gone crazy these last few months while my son has been home, last night I discovered that I do not really want my son to go back to school. What sort of madness is this parenting stuff? <BR> <BR> I was sitting in the middle of a crowded, loud, comedy club when I discovered this and, I asked my self, "Self .... are you KIDDING?" <BR> <BR> The crowded comedy club was causing me some anxiety to begin with but while I was sitting there waiting for... Mon, 12 Aug 2013 12:18:03 EST How To Get Back on Track http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5446025 Since I've gotten off track, I've been thinking about this topic. In the end, with just about everything, Nike had it right, and 'Just Do It' is really a guarantee for success for just about everything. <BR> <BR> But alas! I am not a 'Just Do It' type of person and despite being aware of Nike's wisdom since I was about 15, I am still not a 'Just Do It' person. For me, everything is a process, and then, finally, then, I 'Just Do It'. <BR> <BR> If you have been reading my blog posts, I... Tue, 6 Aug 2013 06:12:29 EST Geek Fest was Awesome!! Bring it on August! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5444606 There were panels where I learned a lot about Steampunk, writing, and popular culture in general. <BR> <BR> There was an awesome writing workshop with Jim Butcher. He has a skill for breaking things down. <BR> <BR> I got the cutest zombie doll. You can see them here: <BR> <BR> <link>www.lilwickidz.com </link> <BR> <BR> No I'm not getting any kickback or anything but they are the cutest things EVER and it's a mother doing them with her daughters. SO cool!! <BR> <BR> I am plannin... Sun, 4 Aug 2013 22:09:19 EST I'm Going to a Geek Fest This Weekend and I am So Excited http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5441977 My son and I are dressing in Steampunk attire and going to SpaceCity Con this weekend. <BR> <BR> I've printed out a list of the panels, prioritized the ones I wanted to go to, and then highlighted the time conflicts. We will not have a repeat of Comicapalooza where we went at the last minute and couldn't find any of the panels we were interested in. <BR> <BR> So .... 12 hours today .... 2 hours tomorrow and Sunday ... and the rest of the time I will be at GeekFest!! <BR> <BR> Space Cit... Fri, 2 Aug 2013 08:30:31 EST Goodbye July 2013 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5438043 Dear July 2013, <BR> <BR> I am tired of you. I mean, your sister June 2013 wasn't so great but I was still sort of holding it together while she was around. <BR> <BR> My first complaint is that you're hot. Not hot in the good way. You're just plain hot. You're so hot that I just don't care too much about my plants anymore. Sure, I'll give them some water but if they are wanting admiration, or a little bit of care in the morning, they can forget about it. I've just let them fend for... Tue, 30 Jul 2013 00:13:53 EST Descent Into Sanity http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5432893 I took a few days (really a day and a half) to just chill. Again. I might need that every week. <BR> <BR> I also have this weekend off. I am going to Space City Con next week with my son and I have to make him a vest. That should take up my entire weekend because I haven't sewn an actual item of clothing since I sewed baby clothes for him. I am sure it will work out though. <BR> <BR> I've been watching Warehouse 13 which I really love. I'm almost out of episodes. <BR> <BR> I've deci... Thu, 25 Jul 2013 09:47:45 EST I'm Drawing the Line in the Sand http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5430413 Last night this was said to me: <BR> <BR> "I am going to make sure you get hurt." <BR> <BR> There were other things said to me but I won't repeat them here. I have been thinking about this conversation ever since it happened. I have decided that this is out of hand and much too far for someone to go. I don't care if I can really be hurt or not. No one is ever saying that to me ever again. Not ever. <BR> <BR> The whole threatening nature of the conversation upset me so much that I ... Tue, 23 Jul 2013 09:58:55 EST Interesting What People Have Said About Weight Watchers http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5427727 It's kind of sad that anyone has had a weight watchers leader who gets on you when you don't lose weight. Or, one that always talked about themselves. <BR> <BR> I guess it happens. <BR> <BR> I've always gone to the same lady. I have gone and left and gone and left Weight Watchers for the last 10 years but I also go back to the same leader. <BR> <BR> I really enjoy Weight Watchers and it is really the only formal weight loss program that I've been to. I just never wanted to go on a di... Sat, 20 Jul 2013 22:12:48 EST Tomorrow I'm off to Weight Watchers http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5426964 It's confession time. I haven't been to Weight Watchers in two weeks. I barely remember why. I think it had something to do with a combination of exhaustion and my son having the car. <BR> <BR> I think I've gained weight. Well, I know I have. <BR> <BR> I have a remarkable capacity for not giving a sh*t. I can get myself into that sort of mindset about just about anything. I guess you could call it a gambling technique. Except I will gamble with the big things in life. Like, I do... Sat, 20 Jul 2013 00:38:36 EST I'm Just Taking a Few Minutes This Morning to Talk About Myself http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5426064 I've been getting more sleep. Yesterday I got a record breaking 7 hours of sleep. Of course, I also overslept. So that small achievement was overshadowed - tainted so to speak. <BR> <BR> I'm doing well with my weight loss. I just still do less well than I was before. <BR> <BR> My son had almost this whole week off. He had pink eye. It is gone now and has actually been gone for a bit. <BR> <BR> He's been working on website stuff for me. He's been doing a good job. I am proud o... Fri, 19 Jul 2013 06:42:22 EST Man......... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5423690 Okay. I got my exercise in today. Yay! <BR> <BR> I really had every intention of having a good day. <BR> <BR> I had to turn the lights off in my office to soothe my tortured soul by 5pm. <BR> <BR> I worked 12.5 hours today. Which I don't generally have a problem doing today. <BR> <BR> But I am telling you, there are days when it just seems like all that's coming across my path is craziness. <BR> <BR> One woman called me a minimum wage operator who would never do any better than I... Wed, 17 Jul 2013 01:06:34 EST OMG Poptarts are POISON http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5421403 Poptarts are 200 a piece! My son eats them like they are ... I don't know ... what would the word be ... grapes? I wouldn't say candy because evidently they are candy. <BR> <BR> Recently my son started getting on my case about what I could and couldn't eat in my own pantry. He didn't want me eating his poptarts. So I have been eating his poptarts. I like them and I won't be told what I can and can't eat by my 20 year old son. <BR> <BR> But I tracked them this morning and my LORD. T... Mon, 15 Jul 2013 06:15:34 EST sssshhhhhh...... don't tell anyone but ...... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5420044 I have rollerblades. <BR> <BR> My son said, 'What are you a throwback to the 80s?' <BR> <BR> ....and I said: <BR> <BR> 'Don't you remember when we used to go rollerskating? I LIKE rollerskating. I want to do it again.' <BR> <BR> Now the truth is that the last time I went rollerskating I was 250 pounds. It was hard on my knees and I couldn't do it for long at all. <BR> <BR> But....I didn't care how I looked then and I'm not going to worry about it now. I mean, I weigh less, it sh... Sat, 13 Jul 2013 18:16:07 EST