ALLYSNEWLIFE's SparkPeople Blog ALLYSNEWLIFE's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community 2014 Update It's been a while since I wrote a blog...almost a year in fact... <BR> <BR> I have struggled so much with my weight over the last couple of years. I went from about 145 lbs up to 200 lbs. I'm back down in the 190's but so upset since I was so happy when I was in the 140s. I need to tighten my belt, for lack of better words, and get back to watching my diet and really and truly get back to counting calories since I know that works for me. <BR> <BR> What really is heart breaking for me is go... Wed, 15 Jan 2014 12:44:20 EST Living Life? I feel like I'm just floating through life and not really living it. Every day it's the same thing, get the kids up and out the door for school, have lunch with the hubby, kids and hubby come home from school/work, have dinner, hit the gym (most days)....rinse and repeat. I don't have anything that I'm excited about anymore. I used to be excited about going to the gym since I knew that I would be seeing the results in my body but for the last six months I have been losing and gaining the same... Mon, 22 Apr 2013 21:37:30 EST The Past.... Funny how the past molds you into the person you are today... <BR> <BR> <BR> So last night at dinner my son brought up fighting at school and during the conversation my husband asked me if I ever got into a fight at school, to which I told him yes; that when I was in middle school school some guy hit me and knocked me into a pole. Some how this led me to say that I end up having guys hitting me, which turned into a conversation of the person I was involved with before my husband and how he ... Wed, 17 Apr 2013 20:52:53 EST Perceptions Perception is a funny thing. Especially how we perceive ourselves. Lately I have a different perception of what I look like than what I actually look like. In my mind I still feel like what I did when I was 40 lbs lighter: <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> When in reality I actually look like this: <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <img src=" Sat, 13 Apr 2013 20:06:52 EST Just a Bit Stressed Waiting games suck big time. We are waiting for our federal tax refund to hit our bank account and according to the IRS website the funds were sent to our bank yesterday. It's only been one day sent the money was sent so there isn't much to be worried about, but somehow someone hacked into our state system and stole information on those who filed state taxes and it can affect our return this year. That's a lot of money to be taken from us and it's what we are using to jump start our savings ... Thu, 7 Feb 2013 10:59:21 EST Pity Party Day Really feel like a having a big ol' pity party for myself today. I have eaten so much crap and I keep going back to the pantry for more. I HATE days like this. Yeah, it's emotional eating. I'm stuck in my house pretty much day after day after day. The only times I really get out is when I go the gym and when I go to the commissary. Only having one car sucks, but we are hoping to change that status when we get our tax refund and we can get a cheap 2nd car. Not that I will really have any where... Tue, 29 Jan 2013 08:43:27 EST 4 Weeks into the New Year So I have been going strong on my weight loss for the last 4 weeks and I have had some really great results. I'm down 8 lbs as of Friday. My workouts have been good, though I am constantly looking for new ways to change up my cardio. Instead of just going for a run I have been doing some interval/sprints on the treadmill. I'm running at 6.0 for half of a quarter mile then walking for a quarter of the quarter mile. It averages out about the same minute per mile but it has helped my breathing, ... Mon, 28 Jan 2013 13:02:40 EST 2013 Since 2012 wasn't what I wanted for myself with my weight loss journey I plan on making 2013 10x better. <BR> <BR> I plan on losing the last 60ish lbs to finally reach my goal 130 lbs. I plan on being a much happier person, since I know that when I'm happy I have a easier time losing the weight. I will continue to see my therapist to reach that goal to being happy. <BR> <BR> This year I plan on getting out of my house more often than just going to the commissary or to the gym. I will find ... Mon, 31 Dec 2012 11:10:14 EST Motivation VS Determination Motivation is a great thing. It can help you jump start your weight loss but motivation doesn't last. It's the determination of making that change last for a life time that will get you through the process. <BR> <BR> When I started this process close to 2.5 years ago I had some great motivation. My motivation was to prove all those who called me fat, ugly and who knows what else that they were wrong. And once the weight started to fall off and people started to see who I really was the dete... Tue, 18 Dec 2012 12:57:31 EST Confession Time... It has been over a year since I have successfully lost any amount of weight. This past week I have seen my weight creep back up close to 190 and its scary. The month of December hasn't seen much time in the gym, 10 days in and I have only worked out twice, though I did get to the gym after my therapy this afternoon. Some the weight gain I have seen I know is due to my period, but still its hard to watch that number go up and up and up. I can happily say that if I haven't stuck to going to the... Mon, 10 Dec 2012 20:24:52 EST Emotions... I have several emotions going on in my head right now and I'm 100% certain they are the reason I'm having such a hard time with my weight loss right now. <BR> <BR> ANGER, PISSED OFF, HURT: <BR> I am angry, pissed off and hurt at the one person who is suppose to love me unconditionally. But apparently she either didn't get that memo or what I have been thinking for the last 12 years is really true. That I don't live up to her standards and that her love comes with conditions that I guess I'l... Fri, 5 Oct 2012 18:06:53 EST Over Coming Obstacles Over the weekend my husband found out that his grandmother on his dad's side of the family passed away. He spent most of yesterday trying to figure out a way to get back up home, which is about a 3 hour drive, and not leave me and the kids without a car. Oh the joy of only having one vehicle. We finally decided for him to just take the car since he will only be gone over night at the most. And I'm sure that if anything comes up here at home while he is gone that there is someone I can lean on... Mon, 10 Sep 2012 20:23:01 EST Gaining Weight Sucks I hate that I gained back close 40 lbs back! I know that I wrote a while back that I was back on track but it wasn't so. Yeah, I stayed true to the gym and my workouts but the diet portion wasn't there. It's true about what they say; losing weight is 20% exercise, 80% diet. Getting back up to basically 188 lbs was easier than I thought could happen. And now I'm dealing with the downside of it. Most and I mean about 85% of my clothes don't fit me anymore. And working with a limited wardrobe be... Thu, 6 Sep 2012 19:05:08 EST Back on Track with Friends I think I have slowly found myself back on track. Though I can't take all the credit. I have two really good friends who have set up an accountability group. Through out the day we text each other to see how we are doing with our food choices and also our workouts for that day. We even send in a snap shot of our calories/exercise totals for the day off the Sparkpeople mobile app. It's great that even though we aren't in the same city/state we have this support for each other. <BR> <BR> I al... Thu, 26 Apr 2012 21:14:12 EST My First 10k Race Experience Today was my first 10k race. I ran it with my husband. We got up at 3 am to be out there door by 3:30 so we could stop by a convenience store to grab some water. We were downtown Charleston by 4 am, one of the first to show up. We wanted to be in line early for the buses to take us from Charleston to Mount Pleasant to where the race would start. Worked out great, we were on the second bus to head over. They drop you off about a half a mile or so from the starting line, so we took our time sin... Sat, 31 Mar 2012 21:37:23 EST Time to Run So it's finally here: The Cooper River Bridge Run. I have been looking forward to this race for a year now. As I was watching my husband run it last year I was envious of not doing it then so I made sure that I signed up for this years race. <BR> <BR> This morning we headed downtown to pick up our packets. I was eager to see which corral we were assigned to so I can see which wave we would start in. According to the map we are starting in the third wave for our estimated run time. We have 6... Fri, 30 Mar 2012 15:36:41 EST Stress On the Body So the last couple of weeks I have been stressed out over several different situations, but hey that's life, right? But the down side of being stressed out and upset over things is that body pays me back in such horrible ways such as massive headaches that tend to lean into migraines and really horrible acne. I seriously thought it was clearly up but look it, it seems worse: <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> The acne on my forehead has d... Thu, 29 Mar 2012 21:47:26 EST Last PreRace Run Lesson learned today...don't expect a great run time the day after a really good leg workout and circuit training class. Plus I'm still not used to running in warmer weather. I'm glad that the race is early in the morning while its still cool, though I'm totally not looking forward to getting up at the butt crack of dawn. After talking with my husband I have decided to take both tomorrow and Friday off from the gym to let my body rest up. This will be my first 10k and I haven't ran 6 miles in... Wed, 28 Mar 2012 19:08:54 EST Workouts (plus a random thought) I finally saw a drop in weight this month. I had been hovering around the same weight for about 3 weeks and it was getting really frustrating to see that same number over and over. I know that my body is going through some transition since I have added a lot more full body workouts to my schedule. Not that I don't like lifting weights in the traditional sense, but doing this class and working out with another friend here on base has really got drive back in full swing. Plus I now can take wha... Tue, 27 Mar 2012 19:36:15 EST Random Thoughts... I'm hopefully back on was a great day. I didn't go crazy with eating so much I felt like crap...not that I ate the best considering I had a bag of peanut m&m's. Those plus Reece's peanut butter cups are my weakness. Thank god the last bag is gone and I'm not going to buy any more any time soon. Plus I got in all 5 miles that I had planned today. They weren't my fastest miles but I was only working on distance today. And for once I never thought of stopping before the 5 miles wer... Mon, 26 Mar 2012 19:26:23 EST Some Frustrations I am so frustrated right now. From November through February I gained back over 20lbs. I honestly got bored with what I was doing at the gym and fed up with watching everything that I ate. And over the last month I have struggled to not gain anymore weight since I can't get a grip on getting my eating cleaner, but the good news is that I have found my love for the gym and working out again. A friend of mine here introduced me to a new circuit training class at the gym and she has also put tog... Sun, 25 Mar 2012 12:49:02 EST Run..Run..Running into Races Well the running bug has bitten me big time!! I'm running my third 5k (my 2nd official timed 5k) at the beginning of March. This will be the 2nd time running this 5k and I'm hoping to shave 4-5 minutes off my time from last year, though they are using a new course this year. And I'm running my first 10k at the end of March, with a daunting incline within the first 5k of the race, with the rest of the race downhill or flat. I watched my husband run it last year and while being a spectator I wa... Fri, 20 Jan 2012 13:34:56 EST More Goals to Reach For!!! This is about setting goals for myself. These aren't weight loss related in the sense of dealing with the "dieting" or exercising that comes with the weight loss battle, but more from the mental picture of what I have about myself from the weight loss battle. Some of you or most of you know that I was obese from 2001 until last year when I finally left that category behind. And in those 10 years I haven't really care what I looked like. I wore jeans and tee shirts, no make up or any type of j... Wed, 11 Jan 2012 20:35:14 EST 2011 onto 2012 2011 was a successful year in the weight loss department for the most part. I started out the year weighing 197.8 and ended the year weighing 156.6 for a total lost of 41.2 pounds. Granted I would have liked it to be more but I had a "bad" couple of months during October and November where I gained back around 13-14 lbs. <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> But I did go from looking like this: <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> To looking like this: ... Mon, 2 Jan 2012 20:28:25 EST Photos from my photo shoot... Last Sunday I had a photo shoot down at Riverfront Park in North Charleston, part of the old naval base. It was such a pretty place and a beautiful day. I did the photo shoot as a favor to my friend who put together an event for her and a couple other photographers to put in their portfolio. The name of the shoot was Real Beauty. And in return for helping out with the photo shoot the photographers are going to give me some of the photos for FREE!! Here are a few of the photos that they have e... Fri, 9 Dec 2011 14:00:41 EST Eating my emotions.... I just love how stress, being upset, and every other emotion I have felt over the few days has brought out the inner fat girl in me. I have had great intentions every morning of getting in a great workout (which I have stuck to, with today's run being AWESOME) and then sticking to a good eating plan. Breakfast starts off great and then the day goes down the drain. Yesterday I bought a sinful brownie mix with caramel baked in it. Yep, that bad boy lasted last night and today. I polished off th... Wed, 16 Nov 2011 20:50:13 EST So Pissed.... Once again I won't be spending Thanksgiving with my family and being this close it really sucks big time. But again, my mother was behind it. <BR> <BR> Last year (our first year back in 6 years) I had asked if Thanksgiving dinner could be moved up or down a couple of hours so that me, Ty, and the kids could see some of the his family too. But my mom wouldn't even ask my other aunts if that was possible. It wasn't that I was asking to do this every year, just our first year back. I asked why ... Mon, 14 Nov 2011 19:04:01 EST Stress and Judgements... So I have had a lot on my mind lately and this has been one of them and at times I think it stresses me out. And we all know how stress can affect our bodies, especially when we are trying to lose weight. I have only said this to maybe two people, one for sure. So here goes... <BR> <BR> I have been wondering a lot lately who would stop wanting to hang out with me or even be my friend if I told them the truth about my religious beliefs. I don't believe in church and I don't believe in the bib... Wed, 9 Nov 2011 17:23:44 EST Truth Time Time to be honest really. Ever since the 2nd week of October I have really fell off to the wayside with my workouts and eating healthy. I want to blame it all on the fact that I'm now a lot busier than I have been all year but honestly that isn't true. Yes, I am busier than normal. Every weekend except for the first one in October was filled with one activity after another. And yes, we have gone down to one car as I stated in my previous blog but I have let stupid reason stop me from making i... Sun, 6 Nov 2011 20:53:08 EST ERRR!!!! It's been a while since I have written a blog, even though I have been wanting to write one for a while now. But I think last night really set me off. My dad called me last night and we talked about normal family things and then right before we got off the phone he was asking me about my weight loss. He pissed me off by have the gall to get onto me about not getting to the gym as much as I should lately. Telling me how easy it is to gain the weight back. I hate when talks to me like I am a ch... Thu, 3 Nov 2011 10:22:50 EST Going Shopping... I went out shopping for a little bit yesterday afternoon. One of my main reasons was to get another pair of jeans...with the weather cooling down 1 pair wasn't going to cut it and the pair I have I love since they are really comfortable but they are on the long side and only look good with heels. So we headed out to the Tanger Outlets and to the American Eagle store. It's such a different experience to shop for clothing now then it was a year ago. I know my body type so I stayed away from the... Sun, 9 Oct 2011 19:15:31 EST Time to kick some sucky week's @$$.... What a week it has been so far, and not a good one in my book as far as eating and exercising has gone. On Sunday I made country fried steak, fried okra, green beans, rice and gravy made with the pan drippings. Yeah, granted that is a lot of food and a lot of fried food, but I haven't made this since I started this journey over a year ago and I know that having it just once isn't going to kill my "diet" or weight loss. But then Monday rolls around....I hit the gym like I normally do, did a pr... Wed, 5 Oct 2011 11:56:38 EST Fabulous Weekend.... I had a fabulous weekend of hanging out with friends and family. I got to hang out with some oh so fabulous ladies Friday morning with yummy treats and great conversation, then Friday night I went out with some more fabulous ladies to Downtown Charleston, went dancing at a couple of clubs, which I haven't done in I can't count how many years...though I did have more drinks than I had planned on, lol. But one of the biggest things I realized Friday night was that I no longer think of myself as... Sun, 2 Oct 2011 21:35:41 EST Opinions Needed/Wanted.... So, through out this whole process of me dropping this weight my one want, my one hope would be that my legs would slim down. When I was at my highest weight I carried my weight pretty much all over my body, though my stomach was very big, but so were my legs, arms, and face. And as I have dropped the weight I have lost the weight in my face, arms and stomach, but I feel that my legs are still as big as ever. When trying on pants I don't necessarily worry so much as if they will fit in the wa... Tue, 20 Sep 2011 17:07:04 EST Thoughts on my weigh in today plus another random though... You know what the best thing about weight loss is: how the darn scale yo-yos back and forth with my weight....NOT!! One week I'm 149.2 and the next 150.2. Yes, I know the reasons why its back up to 150.2 and those reasons are: not really being as careful with my food this week, not getting in all of my workouts and the fact that my period is due to start some time this weekend, hence the not so carefulness of my eating. And yes, it's only a pound...but let me tell ya that pound is hard as cra... Fri, 16 Sep 2011 16:01:36 EST The Ugly Fat Girl? So I was taking a look at my past blogs the other day and I came across the blog I wrote back in April that showed my weight loss journey in pictures. And all I can say is OMG! That starting picture is so freaking horrendous. I can't believe that I actually thought I looked pretty weighing that much. I can't believe that my husband actually found me attractive then. And I can honestly say that I was not one of the pretty fat girls...I was just plain fat and ugly. Its funny what lies one's sel... Tue, 13 Sep 2011 19:52:13 EST Determining Goal Weight?!? So...I guess it has finally happened...I had someone at the gym today tell me that I look to be at a great size now. Yes, I'm so much further than when I started, pretty much half the size in clothing than when I started, but I just don't feel like I'm where I actually want to be. I thanked her and told her that I have about 20 more pounds to go. I guess I see myself differently than what others see. And I don't see the 240 lb women either...I just see someone who could still use the benefit ... Sat, 10 Sep 2011 15:53:19 EST Wearing my new jeans out.... This afternoon I had a meeting with some of the other spouse's from my hubby's squadron. He has only been with this squadron since the middle of May and they have made me feel so welcomed, they are just a great group of ladies. Kinda off the point of this blog, but had to say it. <BR> <BR> And since the weather has cooled down a little here in Southern SC I thought this would be a great time to wear my new jeans...I've had them for almost a month but its been to hot to wear them, lol. I hadn... Thu, 8 Sep 2011 21:02:04 EST Being sick and losing weight I have been sick over the last couple of body was achy and sore, like how you feel after lifting weights when you haven't in a long time, plus all I wanted to do was sleep all day. And then on the way home from my therapy appointment I started to shake uncontrollably. Plus I felt like I had a headache coming on from all the sleeping. I took a hot bath to help relieve some of the soreness from my body and took some Excedrin Back &amp; Body and took another nap. I am so thankful that... Wed, 7 Sep 2011 15:18:02 EST Pitiful Ally Day...errrr!! It's Monday afternoon and I have had one of those "suck it" days....where everything you think can go wrong retrospect. <BR> <BR> Ever since my weigh in on Friday I have slowly gained weight...yes I know in reality that I really didn't gain the weight since I haven't eaten that many calories...except for maybe today and I have gotten to the gym to workout...two pretty damn good workouts in my opinion. <BR> <BR> But my feelings today have been pretty sucky. I have felt like crap ... Mon, 5 Sep 2011 18:36:32 EST BOD POD Results!!!! So I just got back from my BOD POD test and I am happy with the way the results are going. I had my first test done on March 4, 2011, second on June 1, 2011 and this is my third. <BR> <BR> Stats: <BR> <BR> March 4, 2011 <BR> <BR> Weight: 182.890 lbs <BR> Fat Free Weight: 111.191 lbs <BR> Fat Weight: 71.699 lbs <BR> Body Fat Percentage: 39.2% <BR> <BR> June 1, 2011 <BR> <BR> Weight: 170.034 lbs <BR> Fat Free Weight: 107.324 lbs <BR> Fat Weight: 62.71 lbs <BR> Body Fat Percentage: 36.9% <... Thu, 1 Sep 2011 15:55:54 EST Plateau Anyone??? Yep its the evil word: Plateau!!! <BR> <BR> I feel like I have been playing with the same 5-7 lbs over the last 2 months. I knew that getting closer to my final goal that it was going to be harder and harder to drop the weight. But I'm getting quite frustrated at seeing the same weight over and over every week. Yes, I'm happy that I have gotten this far along but I don't believe that this is where I am going to be the happiest. I want to be in the 120's. I don't think its an unreachable goa... Thu, 1 Sep 2011 11:17:47 EST Thoughts of Others??? This has been on my mind over the last few days, if not more.... <BR> <BR> As I was walking through the gym the other day I started to wonder who there thought I was fat. And despite the fact that I have lost 90 lbs I still have those feeling of others judging the way I look. Like today, I was in the free weight room and was the only female in there for most of the time. And apart from a couple of older gentlemen all the other guys that were in there are very very fit, muscular. Not to sound... Mon, 29 Aug 2011 17:12:28 EST The Ups and Downs of My Week.... Well, this week has been interesting. On Friday I had my weigh in and was down to 152 lbs. Not as much as I wanted to lose since it was only .6 of a pound from the week before but I chalked it up to me starting my period soon. But the weekend kicked my ass in the food department. I think the only half way decent day I had was Saturday. Plus I didn't workout on Sunday since my mother-in-law was in town for a short time and we wanted to hit the beach. In the past I have been able to work off th... Thu, 25 Aug 2011 21:16:42 EST Just one of those days you want to hit someone.....(vent post) Ever just want to b!t(h slap someone so hard they finally get the sense that they should have gotten at birth? <BR> <BR> Well, that was me tonight about 30 minutes or so ago. Thankfully this person is on the otherside of the country so I'm in no real danger of doing it and getting myself in trouble in more ways than one, lol. And writing this is one more way of getting it off my chest so that I can move on and forget about it. <BR> <BR> A little back story: there was a fellow military wife ... Wed, 17 Aug 2011 22:00:21 EST Great News!!! Great news, anyone? <BR> <BR> As of last Friday's weigh in I'm only .2 lbs away from reaching the 90 lb lost mark!!! That means only 10 more pounds and I will have lost 100 lbs!!! Plus I bought my very pair of jeans in a single digit....size 8!! I also tried on this cute dress in a size Medium. Looking at it on the hanger I didn't think that it would fit, it would be too small...but it fit perfectly. The only down side was that it was a little long for my body type. Since I have bigger legs ... Mon, 15 Aug 2011 21:46:15 EST Update on "Doubts From A Mental Game" I have been doing better the last couple days after I wrote my last blog. I'm up to eating about 1600-1700 calories a day since I'm burning about 1000 at the gym and I haven't had that hungry feeling. I do believe I was bored so I started to think about food which triggered my brain into thinking I was hungry. I ended up talking to my BF in New Mexico later that night and it totally got my mind off food. I need to start keeping my mind busy. So at least I know I'm not starving myself. <BR> ... Thu, 11 Aug 2011 21:47:42 EST Doubts From A Mental Game.... Could I be doing too much at the gym, calorie burning wise? Or could it be that the fact that I let myself eat whatever I wanted over the last two weekends screw my brain up: telling myself that I'm hungry when I'm not, that I HAVE eaten enough for the day? I'm thinking its more of the latter since I have done this type of workout before and been able to be satisfied with the amount I'm eating. In fact I'm eating more now than I did then. I really think this is a mental game right now. Last w... Tue, 9 Aug 2011 20:43:41 EST Motivating? Me? (and other random thoughts) Who would have ever thought that I could be the type of person who motivates people to lose weight? Not me, that's for sure. But I guess I am. I received an email on Saturday from SparkPeople stating that I have been voted as a SparkPeople Motivator. I don't feel like I have done anything special to receive this status. I just got my A$$ off the couch and into the gym and sweated it off, along with eating better foods in smaller amounts. Anyone can do that, what's special about me? And that's... Mon, 8 Aug 2011 15:39:25 EST Weigh In Update and Other Great Surprises So I had my weigh in today....I'm down 1.4 lbs for the wasn't the 1.6-1.8 I was shooting for but I'm happy with it. It brings my weight loss down to a total of 88 lbs, that's only 2 lbs from 90 and puts me solidly in the mid 150's. I can definitely see me hitting my goal of being in the 140's by the time I go for my next Bod Pod test. So I'm still shooting for another 1.6-1.8 gone for next week. I'm still sticking with the higher calorie intake for the next week to see if what I'm d... Fri, 5 Aug 2011 22:30:38 EST