ALL4ME9's SparkPeople Blog ALL4ME9's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Settling In It seems like forever since I've been on SP. And looking at my last blog post, it really has been a long time. <BR> <BR> I've been meaning to write this blog for a few weeks now and always seem to get sidetracked. Tonight, while I'm eating my after dinner yogurt I'm going to finally do some catching up. <BR> <BR> Back at the end of June I took a huge leap of faith and moved from Oregon to Nevada. I packed up a moving POD with my family's essentials, both household and emotional, and hopped ... Thu, 29 Aug 2013 00:45:06 EST Morning rambling Two years ago I started up again on SP. I had big goals and started out strong, like most people do. I was doing great, but lost my focus. I still logged in, still did minimal exercise, but started eating poorly again. Lots of fast food, lots of processed foods. All the things that have kept me stuck for so long. <BR> <BR> Even though I had let quite a few old habits creep back in, I stuck with getting all my water in every day. I still logged in, spun the wheel and read articles. <BR> <BR... Thu, 6 Jun 2013 11:56:50 EST June Goals So, May sucked big time. I lost focus and let my emotions and old habits reign free. I took my measurements today, and gained in almost every place. Except my neck. I actually lost 1/2". I didn't really set any goals for May, and that affected my efforts. I forget how important it is to set those goals, and how they help keep me accountable. <BR> <BR> For June, I'm refocusing all my efforts. I'm writing my goals out and putting them on the fridge. I'm rededicating time to actually track wha... Sun, 2 Jun 2013 14:15:11 EST Birthday binge Yesterday was my birthday. Normally not a big deal to me, but I've been super stressed lately, anxious and feeling unappreciated. I've been doing very well controlling my emotional eating, but yesterday I made up for it. <BR> <BR> The bad news I binged, and I got sick with a stomach ache last night and my head was feeling weird. I didn't get a sugar high, but my body crashed like I had. I was lethargic but couldn't sleep, grouchy and had a super dry mouth. <BR> <BR> The good news is that I ... Thu, 23 May 2013 09:37:25 EST NSV's Since putting away my scale I am strictly relying on NSV's to show my progress. I have to say that I'm happy with the decision, and the results. I think my current NSV is my favorite. Yesterday I had a busy, active day. In the past, even the recent past, I would have been sore the next day. Today, I'm feeling good. Even my knee that was bothering me yesterday at the end of the day feels back to normal this morning. <BR> <BR> Since January, my NSV's are: <BR> <BR> 1) Down a pants size. Stil... Tue, 7 May 2013 11:22:58 EST February results and March Missions February is always a rougher month for me food wise. I'm still coming down from the holidays, and my daughters birthday is in February. Then there's Valentines day and a few more friends' birthdays. I'm still proud of what I accomplished this month. <BR> <BR> Here are my mission results for February: <BR> <BR> 1) Continue getting in 8 glasses of water a day. * Check! Always, always get my water in now, even if I have other beverages. <BR> 2) At least two servings of fresh veggies a day. *Be... Thu, 28 Feb 2013 15:55:04 EST Rough week and revamped February missions Last week was rough. All I wanted to do was sleep. There wasn't any real emotional reason that I was feeling so blah and not wanting to do anything. At least none that I can pinpoint. I barely exercised (only two days last week of scheduled exercise time), didn't track my food, and for four days all I did was sleep. I was exhausted. I'm sure part of it was because of my period, but it hasn't affected me like that in years. And, I'm positive it wasn't a depressive type of need to sleep. That I... Mon, 11 Feb 2013 15:19:43 EST February Missions This month I'm keeping things simple. I have a lot going on, including my daughter turning 18!! I want to be realistic about what I can accomplish, and what I am willing to do this month. <BR> <BR> Mission #1: Continue tracking food, water and exercise. <BR> Mission #2: Ride my bike for at least 14 minutes 5x a week, and keep working with my hula hoop. <BR> Mission #3: Lose 5lbs. <BR> Mission #4: Continue working on doing squats with the weighted bar, making sure my form is correct. <BR> Mis... Mon, 4 Feb 2013 15:25:32 EST January = Success January has ended up being a pretty good month for me. I didn't meet all my goals, but I still did really well. <BR> <BR> I set a goal to lose 5lbs this month. According to my scale that didn't happen *shrugs*. According to MY scale I've been losing the same 5lbs for the last 6 months, and my son has stayed the same weight. According to his scale at school he has lost another 10lbs. I think my scale is screwy, again. That's okay though, because one of my goals was to not tie my emotions to w... Thu, 31 Jan 2013 12:32:20 EST Journals and Focus I still track my Fast Track goals. I like the fact that they are ones I know I can reach. In December I changed them as the ones I had set up I was reaching every day, and I wanted to challenge myself a little more. <BR> <BR> One of the goals I chose was to journal 3x a week. I'm still not making it three times every week, but I am writing in it at least once. I'm finding that it's just as easy to lie to myself in a journal as it is at any other time. It seems kind of silly that I can't eve... Mon, 14 Jan 2013 10:22:37 EST Progress I've refused to put full body pictures on here because I was ashamed. I admit how much I weigh, but actually having people see it has been very daunting. <BR> <BR> As part of my journey this year, I am working on NOT hiding anymore. I've come along way since I started over a year ago. It may not be where I was hoping I'd be, but it's progress. In honor of myself, I'm posting the pictures of when I started and my current pictures. <BR> <BR> <img src=" Fri, 4 Jan 2013 22:38:10 EST No Need to Wait I have friends who are waiting until tomorrow to start dieting. I'm not dieting, and I'm not waiting. <BR> <BR> I was far from perfect in December, but I still managed to reach my goals. I lost 5lbs, rode my recumbent bike every day (I can now do 20 minutes on a good day, and my average is 16 minutes a day!) and I did every single day of a squat challenge. <BR> <BR> I'm not waiting. Waiting is just another form of procrastination, and I already do enough of that. I don't need to wait when ... Mon, 31 Dec 2012 14:06:34 EST ROCK IT Week 16 Challenge: What I've learned Today is the last day of the DG seasonal challenge. In some ways it seems like the time flew, in others it feels like it was forever. <BR> <BR> What did I learn during these past 16 weeks? A lot, and not all of it related to my health goals. <BR> <BR> I took a lot of time during this challenge to work on some important emotional issues. I realized that there is still a lot of anger in me from my past. I decided to let go of those people who didn't have the time for me, and to quit acting li... Sat, 20 Oct 2012 16:57:41 EST Why I keep moving even when the scale isn't Because a year ago I couldn't do the morning uphill walk, and then come home and exercise. This year I can. <BR> <BR> My feet don't hurt as much as they used to. <BR> <BR> I can breathe better. <BR> <BR> I <em>26</em> the way my arms feel after a round of ST. <BR> <BR> My legs can carry me for longer distances. <BR> <BR> I've regained my love of dance. <BR> <BR> I keep being astounded by how much more energy I have these days. <BR> <BR> My arms are looking less like a thing of sausa... Wed, 19 Sep 2012 22:52:29 EST Rock It Food Log Day 5 Last day for the food log! Usually, I don't make it the entire week. I'm feeling fairly accomplished for completing the challenge this week. I still wasn't feeling so great this morning. I actually ended up sleeping over 13 hours last night, which is really weird. <BR> <BR> Breakfast: Honey Bunches of Oats, raspberries, milk <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Snack: Cherries, celery and almond butter <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople... Sun, 9 Sep 2012 01:06:48 EST Rock It Food Log Day 4 I woke up today feeling out of it. I just wanted to sleep and barely got through my day before crashing. Unfortunately, me not feeling on top of my game led to some not so great eating choices. <BR> <BR> Breakfast: Honey Bunches of Oats, milk, blueberries and a string cheese <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Snack: Odwalla Pearberry Jive juice, two cookies <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Lu... Sat, 8 Sep 2012 01:26:19 EST Food Log: Day 3 Here comes day 3! <BR> <BR> Breakfast: Frosted mini wheats, raspberries, milk and a plout. <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Lunch: Turkey breast lunch meat, Tillamook colby/jack cheese, Dave's Killer Bread Good Seed, baby carrots, raspberries and blueberries. <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Snack: String cheese, Dryers strawberry fruit bar <BR> <img src=" Fri, 7 Sep 2012 00:26:52 EST Food Log: Day 2 WARNING: Not a fantastic food day! We have a tradition at my house that on the last day of Summer break we will either go out for Chinese food, or have some delivered. Neither child wanted to go anywhere, so we opted for delivery. <BR> <BR> Breakfast: Same as yesterday. Frosted mini-wheats, 1 cup milk, 3/4 cup blueberries, banana, and vitamins. <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Lunch: Turkey breast sandwich on Dave's Killer Good Seed Bread, T... Wed, 5 Sep 2012 00:51:46 EST Rock It! Week 10: Day 1 This week we are to do a food blog of all our food for 5 days. Here is my first day. I actually started the day off STARVING, but by the time I fixed my breakfast that feeling had past, thank goodness! <BR> <BR> We do Meatless Mondays at my house, so no meat today. After logging everything in, I managed to meet all but my sodium goals. I went over on that, and I'm pretty sure it's all the cheese I ate today! <BR> <BR> Breakfast: 1 cup frosted shredded wheat, 3/4 cup blueberries, 1 cup milk,... Tue, 4 Sep 2012 01:10:27 EST ROCK IT: WEEK ONE I flunked out of the SASS challenge last time around. I just sort of gave up and wasn't being as active as I was before. I just lost my 'umph' to keep going. But, I'm back and feeling stronger and more ready!!! <BR> <BR> This week's challenge is to plan 3-5 workouts and complete them. It's been a while since I've set some structure for myself with exercising, so this is going to be rough but fantastic for me. It sucks because this time last year I was exercising every singly day and feeling ... Sun, 1 Jul 2012 14:08:14 EST SASS Challenge: Week 14 So, I fizzled out for a little over a month, but I'm back. This week's SASS challenge is to share a victory you've achieved for your cardio during this challenge. <BR> <BR> Even with the bad attendance I've had, I do have a HUGE victory. <BR> <BR> This past weekend I did a 4 mile hike. On a mountain, Opal Creek Wilderness to be exact. Lots of hills and some not so great footing. If it wasn't for the challenges and the extra pushes to get my exercise in, this wouldn't have happened. It defi... Sun, 3 Jun 2012 21:13:28 EST My Favorite NSV I have lots of NSV's that I'm proud of and that make me extremely happy. The same as most people, you know, wearing a smaller pant size, smaller bra, being able to walk longer, having more energy. <BR> <BR> But today, as I was getting dressed I had the best NSV to date. I have edema in my left leg, nasty, nasty stuff. The swelling can be horrendous on a bad day. I haven't been able to pull up socks past my ankle on that leg in years. <BR> <BR> But today I did this: <BR> <img src="http://p... Thu, 29 Mar 2012 20:33:00 EST Week in review and new goals! Last week I decided to start giving myself weekly goals hoping that it would help keep me motivated. <BR> <BR> My goals for last week and the results are: <BR> <BR> Track everything I eat for at least 2 days. Yup! <BR> Plan out my lunches and dinners for at least 3 days. Did it! <BR> Eat a piece of fruit with every meal. Almost every meal, still needs some work. <BR> No unnecessary trips to the grocery store. Yes!!! Part of that was thanks to the freak snow/ice storm, but whatever works ... Sat, 24 Mar 2012 18:47:40 EST Good things and struggles I can't believe this month is already half over! I'm so ready for full on Spring and nice weather. We have had crazy weather this last week. It feels like Mother Nature is trying to make up for the mild winter we had. <BR> <BR> So, for the good things this week. I can exercise again! I don't feel like I'm going to lose a lung or keel over dying. I'm still stuffed up and taking a decongestant, but thank goodness I can move again!!! I've also been able to increase my workout time to 35 minutes... Sat, 17 Mar 2012 19:37:09 EST March Goals I haven't posted a monthly goals blog in quite some time. Then again, I just haven't been feeling like making goals. Which is probably why I've been slipping. I have a challenge to write down my goals for this month and it made me realize that this is actually one step that was helping me. I plan on doing this again for every month. <BR> <BR> So, here they are! <BR> <BR> 1) Track, Track and TRACK some more!!! I often get lazy and don't track my food or other SP goals. I always track my exer... Mon, 5 Mar 2012 22:59:53 EST MOTIVATE Week 15 challenge The challenge for this week is to blog about two things you learned about yourself during this season's challenge. <BR> <BR> The first thing I learned is that I can push my body hard, but it's also okay to know my limits. This really came about during the burpee challenge. I tried, I really did. I modified those suckers the way they said. Heck, I even did two of the modifications but still couldn't get 10 done in a day. I was frustrated beyond belief and felt like I was letting people down. ... Sat, 3 Mar 2012 00:16:47 EST MOTIVATE Food Challenge: Day 2 I forgot to take a picture of my lunch yesterday, but here are the pictures for the rest of the day. <BR> <BR> Breakfast: <BR> Coffee flavored soy milk <BR> Pink lady apple <BR> Fried egg <BR> Toast(I normally use Dave's Killer Bread Good Seed, but when I went to go make the toast, the bread was bad! So I used a piece of white bread instead) <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Lunch: <BR> Tuna fish on a Dave's Killer Bread Blues Bun <BR> Carrot... Fri, 24 Feb 2012 11:06:34 EST MOTIVATE Food Blog Challenge: Day 1 This is actually my meals for yesterday, Monday Feb. 20. Enjoy! <BR> <BR> So yesterday I just wasn't feeling very hungry for most of the day. I'll be honest, there is usually a much bigger breakfast involved than what I had. Actually, there is more food in general! I did stay within the low range for my calories so that was good. <BR> <BR> Breakfast: <BR> Protein shake(soy protein, 8oz 1% milk) <BR> 1/2 a grapefruit(I used to HATE grapefruit and it brought up a lot of bad memories of being... Wed, 22 Feb 2012 00:09:52 EST Forgiveness This topic has been on my mind a lot these past few weeks. What is it? How does it work? Is it really necessary? Who to forgive, what to forgive, etc. <BR> <BR> I feel as though I've been stuck in rewind for quite some time. Most of my adult life actually. I've been of the mindset that I can just let it go and move on. Which helped me in the past. Recently though I've been wondering if the reason I can't move on in my journey(and other areas of my life) is because I haven't forgiven anyone i... Wed, 15 Feb 2012 00:26:35 EST SPARK-alicious For one of the groups I'm in we have a blog challenge. <BR> <BR> Here's the challenge: I want you to write a blog about yourself... about what makes you "SPARK"le and shine. What do you love about yourself? What do you want to love more in yourself? Why this journey and why now? I want you to blog about your fantastic-ness and let's celebrate self-love <BR> <BR> So, here it goes! <BR> <BR> I have to admit, it's hard at times finding things to love about myself. Not because they aren't th... Sat, 28 Jan 2012 21:11:19 EST Vision board So this week I had a main challenge to add some new cardio in to the mix and make a vision board. <BR> <BR> The new cardio was easy. I chose to do some Just Dance, which I will continue to do on the days when I don't have ST planned. It was fun and really did give me a workout. I'm going to end up with some sweet dance moves and one heck of a right arm! I also tried a different belly dancing video. It was less cardio like and more gentle and smooth. I will probably visit it again, but it wa... Sun, 22 Jan 2012 03:36:55 EST I'm a tiger, RAWWWR! Okay, not really. But I do feel like one some days. <BR> <BR> I have a blog challenge to talk about what type of animal I would be. I thought this was going to be easy but then really started thinking about it. <BR> <BR> Normally I would say I'm like a bear. I look cute and cuddly but do anything to my young and I'm quite ferocious. But that doesn't describe me on a regular basis. <BR> <BR> Then I thought, well, I definitely have days where I'm like a sloth. Completely lazy, hanging around... Wed, 11 Jan 2012 23:51:37 EST 31lbs gone forever! That's right, 31lbs gone for good! Bye-bye-, see ya, Adios, swift kick in the butt out the door! <BR> <BR> This makes me extremely happy! I'm also quite a bit shocked. It just seemed like I would never get even this far. Let's be honest, I didn't think I'd get past 5lbs lost before I gave up. But, here I am. 31lbs lighter and feeling good. <BR> <BR> I reached a goal weight for a challenge I'm in with two weeks to spare! I'm on track for losing 50lbs+ by my 40th birthday. It's a bit scary, b... Sun, 8 Jan 2012 17:35:59 EST The lessons I learned I started taking the steps to a healthier lifestyle back in June. I had been on SP for quite some time, but hadn't done anything with it. In June I deleted my old account and started over. I've had the most success this time around. I've learned so much already. Here's my list of accomplishments and things I've learned: <BR> <BR> 1) I've worked on letting go of my all or nothing attitude. <BR> <BR> 2) There are good days and bad days, just roll with it and start over as soon as you can. <BR... Thu, 29 Dec 2011 17:18:06 EST Scale Dilemma I bought a new scale last week. My old one just has too many issues. I thought this would be a fantastic idea. Then I weighed myself and the dumb thing reads exactly 10lbs. heavier than my old scale. I was so frustrated and heartbroken. <BR> <BR> Last year when I went to take the physical for my job, the doctor at the urgent care clinic told me that if I ever wanted to just come in and weigh myself or have him look over my eating journal to just stop in. He said he'd do it for FREE. He wasn... Fri, 9 Dec 2011 19:46:05 EST Body Image The other day I was looking at the website The Shape of a Woman. In one of their blogs they mentioned a project called adipositivity and Substantia Jones. I decided to check it out. <BR> <BR> Let me tell you, few things have touched me the way this site did. It's all about promoting the acceptance of how our bodies look now. No one on the site is a size 2. They are all overweight. And they are all naked. Yup, butt bare naked. Showing all of their rolls, dimples and sagginess to the world. I ... Wed, 7 Dec 2011 18:05:41 EST December Goals So, November sucked worse than October. I gained 10lbs, lost 6 of it again. Up until the last two weeks of the month I just couldn't get going. I wanted to eat all the time and not do anything. I started feeling and giving in to the need to have something sweet every day. I know part of it is the change in weather. I really don't do well with the time change and less sunlight. <BR> <BR> However, it wasn't as difficult to jump right back in. I managed very quickly to get back to at least 64 ... Fri, 2 Dec 2011 17:47:47 EST DONE and MOTIVATEd I have two challenges this week, both have to do with blogging so I'm killing two birds with one stone. Simply because both of the themes mean the same to me. <BR> <BR> What MOTIVATEs me? What makes me DONE? Why is this time different than all the others??? <BR> <BR> First, my children motivate me. I want to be around long into their adult years. I want to be a healthy grandma someday and an active mom for the rest of their teen years. They are starting to actively support me in this journe... Sun, 20 Nov 2011 19:06:14 EST The 8 people who will ruin your attempt to lose weight... This article is funny and true! I have always loved and this was one of those things that I needed to read. <BR> <BR> ENJOY! <BR> <BR> <link><BR>o-will-ruin-your-attempt-to-lose-weight/ </link> Tue, 15 Nov 2011 15:43:31 EST Getting back on the horse The last couple of weeks have been rough. Nothing short of blech. I don't know what came over me, but I went crazy with letting old habits reign. My job ended for the season last week and I just sort of stopped doing anything short of lazing around on the couch all day at that point. <BR> <BR> I ate poorly, didn't sleep well and barely exercised after last Wednesday. I did still continue to get my strength training in but that was about all I did right. I even drank as little water as possi... Mon, 14 Nov 2011 15:30:02 EST October recap and November goals October sucked for exercise and actually planning out meals but it still turned out marvelous. <BR> <BR> I managed to lose 10lbs <em>334</em> I know it's because of that uphill morning walk. I still think someone lied when they said it would get easier because it's actually more difficult now than when I first started. That's okay though, if it's working to get the pounds to move then it can be hard! <BR> <BR> I did get all my water in every day. Thank goodness that is still going strong.... Sat, 5 Nov 2011 19:41:08 EST 25 and counting Today the scale read 349.4lbs. This puts me at 25lbs gone!!! <BR> <BR> I'm not having as bad an emotional reaction this week as last. I think this has more to do with the fact that I spent Friday night and Saturday with my best friend crying on her shoulder about how scared this all makes me. It helped a lot, still not everything is in full perspective but I feel a bit more secure. <BR> <BR> Along with the weight loss, I also lost an inch around my waist and calf. 1/2 an inch around my upp... Sun, 30 Oct 2011 18:14:32 EST Self sabotage As of Saturday, I'm down 20lbs. Almost 21 and for some reason I feel like sabotaging all my hard work. <BR> <BR> I was super excited to see the scale down that much. I jumped up and down quite a few times. Then out of the blue, this tremendous feeling of fear came. I've been struggling with it since Saturday morning. It seems I get this way with every 5lbs I lose. It's starting to get annoying. <BR> <BR> I'm pretty sure I know where it's coming from. <BR> <BR> For so long my fat has prote... Mon, 24 Oct 2011 20:21:38 EST 17lbs gone and SBS. I am officially down 17lbs as of today!!! It made me super excited this morning and put a little more bounce in my morning walk. <BR> <BR> I wasn't going to weigh myself today because I said I was only going to do it once a month. However, I've started suffering from SBS, aka Saggy Butt Syndrome. You know, where your pants are saggy in the butt and it doesn't matter that you just washed them and haven't worn them yet. This was tragically happening even in my skinny jeans(yes, this big girl w... Fri, 14 Oct 2011 21:20:47 EST Update and randomness So September sorta sucked for the whole weight loss situation. I still managed to lose 5lbs, so I'm not going to complain. It just seemed like nothing was going quite right in this area of my life. I slipped quite a few times food wise. Nothing huge, but I recognized it for what it was and it frustrated me. Still went strong on the exercise so that saved me! <BR> <BR> Now October is starting off with a shrug. My walk in the mornings has been my main form of exercise. I was going to give it a... Sun, 9 Oct 2011 17:41:12 EST The Scale, It MOVED!!! Today was weigh in and measurements. After a couple of weeks of the scale and I disagreeing it decided to move, and this time in the right direction! <BR> <BR> Which officially puts me at 14lbs gone. It's taking forever, but stuff is moving. I was a very happy girl this morning. <BR> <BR> My measurements were a bit weird. My waist stayed the same, lost almost another inch off my neck and upper arm. My thighs are down a 1/2 inch, but my calf is up 1.25 inches! Not quite sure how that happene... Thu, 29 Sep 2011 22:07:36 EST The Plan I almost gave up this weekend. I was so frustrated and depressed on Saturday after trying to work out and not being able to make it my normal 30 minutes. My feet and legs were still hurting from my walks into work. <BR> <BR> I threw a small pity party on Friday and indulged in some chocolate and ice cream. Just a kit kat bar(which I actually ended up splitting with my daughter) and an ice cream bar, but it was still emotional eating and I knew it. But I didn't want to stop myself, so I went ... Sun, 25 Sep 2011 19:12:07 EST New job, forced walk and some frustration Yesterday I got a job and I started it today. YAY ME!!! <BR> <BR> The downside, I have to be at work by 7am. With no car, this means I get to walk a mile to the nearest bus that runs early enough to connect me to my other bus. Which is great exercise, especially when you factor in the two hills I have to climb. <BR> <BR> However, according to SP that walk doesn't burn enough calories. It's about half of what I normally burn doing WATP! I know it doesn't know about the hills or the incline o... Thu, 22 Sep 2011 23:03:11 EST Bragging Rights I know I posted this as my status yesterday, but I'm still super excited and proud of myself that I just had to brag in full form. <BR> <BR> As I was down on the floor finishing up my ST with some crunches, my son decided to join me. He challenged me to 33 more, which is the amount he has to do in gym every day. So away we went. I was able to keep up with him. Then he said let's do some push ups. I told him there was no way I can do push ups. I couldn't even do them when I was thinner. Tryin... Sat, 17 Sep 2011 18:49:11 EST Sweat, sweat, sweat and more sweat! Did I mention SWEAT!?!?!?!?!?! For some reason during my workouts over the last two weeks, I've been sweating like crazy. Kind of out of the blue. I'm not complaining(okay, maybe a little), it just seemed weird that I went from barely breaking a sweat to gallons pouring out of my body during the same workout! <BR> <BR> I hate sweating. I've never enjoyed it. It gets in my eyes, runs down my back. BUT, that was before when I felt like I was sweating all the time for no reason. This sweat kind... Fri, 16 Sep 2011 18:32:02 EST