ADORE83's SparkPeople Blog ADORE83's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Taking stock of my well being Feeling pretty good about my workouts lately, I'm feeling stronger, and while I'm struggling with temptations and cravings more these days I'm still losing just more slowly. I'm enjoying how certain clothing is fitting and going out more often. of course there's more to come and I'm excited about that to. <BR> <BR> Recently gone a few dates with a nice man who seems to like me a lot, and I had to tell him I couldn't make a commitment. I just don't know what I want out of my life yet and I ... Wed, 23 Jan 2013 20:35:29 EST Having a Hard Time with my Sad Today and well really the last few days... or maybe since after christmas I don't know. I guess it's my fault I lost my momentum gave into the food and ate horribly for like a week and missed workouts for several days now as a result i feel awful inside and out. I'm back at it now doing better the last couple days so at least I can banish the guilt. I'm so lonely though, and I can't seem to find people that want to be around me, so it gets hard to believe that its not me. Which begs the questio... Sun, 6 Jan 2013 23:09:16 EST Response to "A Little Disappointed" As always I want to thank everyone for their support and positive thoughts and ideas. I have to admit that I may have been overreacting just a touch... When I started tracking my calories I was completely blown away by the the amount of calories that I had been packing away before joining spark and in response to that I was very very conscious for the next month or so about what I was eating so by allowing myself a cookie here or some spinach dip there lol it really really freaked me out. <B... Mon, 24 Dec 2012 20:14:24 EST A Little Disappointed... Yes, I'm definitely feeling a little disappointed with myself lately; it would seem that my impulse control switch is a little broken, and I'm having a much harder time telling myself "no" to food. I haven't really gone to over board but it's been a little of this and a little of that here and there and I know that adds up. <BR> <BR> I can't quite put my finger on it... maybe I'm getting complacent, or maybe I'm stressed, or maybe just bored... At any rate I don't like it, because I really ... Fri, 21 Dec 2012 23:06:10 EST Things I've noticed... so it"s happened; I've been as patient and steady as I could praying to see some results, and while yes some pounds were ticking off on the scale, its only been the last couple days where I've noticed, felt and seen a change. <BR> <BR> I find it very exciting, I'm down just over 10 pounds. My eating habits have completely changed and unlike other times I've dieted its not even bothering me, I don't want to binge on horrible things because I'm to focused on what I'm putting into my body. be... Sun, 9 Dec 2012 23:52:08 EST Excuses, excuses... SparkCoach has asked me to reflect on the excuses I might make to get out of working out in the form of a blog; and really I haven't had many slip ups as of late maybe because I want to be able to tick off the check boxes in my lists of goals and run up my streaks. However prior to that there were of course always excuses, or maybe more accurately bargains lol. <BR> <BR> Would always tell myself that I'd do todays workout plus tomorrows the next day to get out of todays, of course then tom... Sun, 2 Dec 2012 20:33:02 EST Long Day Had kind of a long day, and just really never woke up. But I stayed in my calorie range and got all my work out in so yea... Except I feel down and mostly I feel alone. <BR> <BR> All I can do is chip away at my damaged soul I suppose. And all my life I've been so guarded that there's really no one I feel that close or connected with. It's just really hard not to think that I must be irrevocably flawed and that's why I have no one. <BR> <BR> I just try to put aside and ignore my negative ... Sat, 1 Dec 2012 01:14:49 EST Fitness Goals So I'm changing up my fitness goals a bit by joining the 28 day bootcamp challenge. Prior I was aiming at a different strength training workout that offers a upper and lower body routine, it definitely seems like a good program but at the very least takes as long as 30 minutes to finish on my very best day. So I'm hoping that these ten minute videos along with the structure of the challenge will make it easier to make strength training more habitual. and once this month is done I can revis... Thu, 29 Nov 2012 13:03:51 EST Feeling Happier with Myself The last two days have me more pumped up and feeling a bit better, I've worked out tons and increased my intensity and had some insights into portion control and today was even a little under my calories and if I can keep that up I'm sure I'll start feeling better and get healthier. <BR> <BR> I think on top of that I'm starting to sort out some of the other life problems rattling around in my head and now I'll be able to take action on some career choice get my life back on track. Finance... Tue, 27 Nov 2012 22:52:52 EST This nagging feeling... I think I've zeroed in on part of what's been keeping me in this oh so blah state for the last week, even though I've been making all these positive steps forward I've put everything else on hold. Career plans, because I'm so timid about meeting new people. So likewise any sort of social life, getting out and socializing, because I don't think people will like me, especially men. <BR> <BR> So my life currently consists of going to a job that I don't want and then coming home. I don't know... Mon, 26 Nov 2012 22:19:56 EST Just Trust the Program Lately I'm having a hard time seeing passed all the negatives in my life, and some days things feel very bleak and it makes me desperate to see results, the problem is they just don't happen that fast. Ive been pretty much on track with the program though, so eventually things should start moving. <BR> <BR> Its just that i've been feeling very bleak. But I guess that I'm going to have to just ignore that feeling and keep plugging away at the issues in my life until I can finally see a lig... Fri, 23 Nov 2012 12:41:02 EST Fine Tuning Ok so just fine tuning my goals to make them measurable and attainable. That being said, I'd - <BR> 1) like to lose 50 lbs this year, by losing 1 lbs a week; <BR> 2) I plan to do this by meeting my daily calorie intake goals and; <BR> 3) by working out for at least ten minutes a day. <BR> Seems very possible to me, and if I can attain even better results that's awesome to, I'm devoting my all to this. <BR> <BR> Thinking about me lately and it occurs to me that when I want ... Sun, 18 Nov 2012 15:44:12 EST Day Four finally got my calorie range in check today so I'm feeling pretty good about that. Plus I spent an hour on the treadmill , if I can keep those things up all I'll have to do is work in some strength training and should be on my way to losing some pounds. I hope. <BR> <BR> Just really want to feel like I'm part of the world and not over looked. at this point I don't even want to interact. don't want to think about school and a new job cuz that just means meeting people and testing my ins... Fri, 16 Nov 2012 00:53:00 EST Day Two So day two, I'm feeling pretty good about things, was just slightly over my calories but it just blows me away how many calories there are in what I've been eating, I thought I'd been eating relatively healthy so I'm kind of shocked. But its good information to have right? <BR> <BR> All I can do is take things one day at time and pat myself on the back for the steps I'm taking in the right direction. It can be hard to not look down on myself but I try so hard to get in a positive place. ... Tue, 13 Nov 2012 22:05:39 EST