ADAGIO_CON_BRIO's SparkPeople Blog ADAGIO_CON_BRIO's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community Trying again I am now signed up for a new round of the BLC. I really need it: I need the discipline; I need the challenges; I need the requirement to post my weight weekly; I need to feel that "team work" is one aspect of my hope to lose weight and to sustain my health, such as it is. <BR> <BR> It has been almost 3 months since I had an encounter with what I call the Spark Bully and I know that she would probably call herself a sophisticated humorist. <BR> Some of the conclusions I have arrived at ... Fri, 9 Jan 2015 10:30:55 EST "Burning the Old Year" Burning the Old Year <BR> BY NAOMI SHIHAB NYE <BR> <BR> Letters swallow themselves in seconds. <BR> Notes friends tied to the doorknob, <BR> transparent scarlet paper, <BR> sizzle like moth wings, <BR> marry the air. <BR> <BR> So much of any year is flammable, <BR> lists of vegetables, partial poems. <BR> Orange swirling flame of days, <BR> so little is a stone. <BR> <BR> Where there was something and suddenly isn’t, <BR> an absence shouts, celebrates, leaves a space. ... Wed, 17 Dec 2014 14:41:54 EST Pride and Prejudice and Pain and Potato Chips I have gained ten pounds since October 18th. I had a trigger, but I accept full responsibility for turning to food, my most effective medication. I collapsed and went totally private so that I could not receive any Spark Mail and I got rid of almost all of my friends because I thought it was better for me simply not to be here. <BR> <BR> I tried to slink away from Spark People in shame; I was badly (in my opinion) chastised by a member of Spark People. She sent me a Spark Mail, I respond... Tue, 16 Dec 2014 17:38:34 EST Full Blown Binge mode I am in full-blown binge-mode. I keep trying to talk myself out of it. The responsibility lies with me. The flaw is mine. <BR> <BR> And I am taking the responsibility. But I had a huge trigger: and now I know that any ostentatious dislike or me or talking down to me is a trigger. I get back to the place when I was young and insecure and see food as the only palliative treatment; the sedative, the tranquilizer. <BR> <BR> It seems to me that here on Spark People we should all be very sensit... Wed, 26 Nov 2014 17:27:11 EST Paulo Coehlo <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Paulo Coehlo has got some good quotations that I like; they are motivational in various ways. <BR> <BR> Some of them seem tried and true; some seem very original. <BR> <BR> 1. The secret of life is to fall seven times and get up eight times. <BR> <BR> 2. Don't waste your time with explanations; people only hear what they want to hear. <BR> <BR> 3. You are not defeated when you lose; you are defeated when you... Sun, 19 Oct 2014 18:14:52 EST I regret my tongue and pen "Responsibility so weighs me down. <BR> Things said or done long years ago, <BR> Or things I did not do or say <BR> But thought that I might say or do, <BR> Weigh me down, and not a day <BR> But something is recalled, <BR> My conscience or my vanity appalled." <BR> <BR> WB Yeats Sat, 18 Oct 2014 15:09:19 EST Coming Out---of some sort of closet: My basement dweller I am sorry that my blogs have often been so "mysterious" and evasive and elusive. <BR> <BR> So let me be honest about my issues: At the moment I am in a heap of tears because I offended somebody on Spark who just "defriended" me. I am not entirely certain what I said precisely, but I was honest with her. Perhaps she dislikes the "honest" me; perhaps she thought that I was trying to implicate her in the bad/negative traits I mentioned. <BR> <BR> Anyhow, the takeaway is to made yourself cr... Sat, 18 Oct 2014 14:43:14 EST Trying harder; trying better <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> A blunt confession: during the past few weeks I have not been trying harder nor trying better. I've been letting myself down in many ways: each little let-down is not anything huge or dramatic but they all add up to a pattern of straying from the path of meliorism. <BR> <BR> I have to face certain hard truths about myself and my life: <BR> Let Wendall Barry speak for me: <BR> <BR> "The question be... Thu, 16 Oct 2014 19:50:53 EST Happy Birthday to Mr. Eliot You are the music while the music lasts. - T.S. Eliot <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> (1) Genuine poetry can communicate before it is understood. <BR> (2) Business today consists in persuading crowds. <BR> <BR> (3) Art never improves, but ... the material of art is never quite the same. <BR> (4) All significant truths are private truths. As they become public they cease to become truths; they become facts, or, at best, part of the public c... Fri, 26 Sep 2014 09:44:59 EST Firefighters and Princesses <img src=""> <BR> <BR> My grandson will be 3 years old in December. He's a delightful little guy but he is also illustrating the kinds of gender stereotypes that are pervasive. In his own home, he calls his mother "Doctor" (as per her instructions) and he sees that only his father does the menial chores. But yet: he is adamant. All boys and men are "Firefighters" and all females are "Princesses". He is insistent. There is one lit... Thu, 18 Sep 2014 17:44:04 EST Surviving My Birthday! <img src="">I survived my birthday and felt a lot better today. It is over; it is done with for another year. And there was no ice cream, no cake, nothing more fattening than a blueberry! <BR> <BR> I am finding my way back into the SPARK zone; I am on a few Spark Teams that will inspire me and keep me going. After over three years of serious Sparking I recognize that when I drift away from Spark People, the pounds start to accumula... Wed, 17 Sep 2014 20:47:10 EST Full Disclosure: I must do better <img src="">I must do better. I have been a bit wacky and wonky and crazy with food of late. Ever since I returned from Norway I have had few "clean" days. It's time to meet my triggers face to face and not simply allow them to walk all over me. <BR> <BR> I have had triggers to buy or eat food that I never had before. I think that my years on Spark People gave me a fairly good list of food that I will not go near in my wildest dre... Thu, 11 Sep 2014 19:52:56 EST Noro Brooklyn Tweed Scarf <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I'm thinking of knitting a couple of these with a black or dark navy background. Knitting discourageds eating. This scarf is modelled by Mrs. Palmer. Tue, 9 Sep 2014 19:00:06 EST Knitting <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I have vowed not to spend any NEW money, but I still have a smallish stash of knitting yarn. I started (and almost completed) a hat like this last night. I already have made a few in various color-ways. <BR> <BR> If I am virtuous about money this month, I just might invest in the yarn to knit a Harry Potter style scarf---perhaps in the Gryffindor colours. Scarves are great to knit because there are few int... Mon, 8 Sep 2014 11:56:22 EST Discipline is my secret friend <img src=""> <BR> <BR> September has always been the beginning of MY year. My birthday is in September; my school year starts in September. September is my month for new resolutions (and yes, I know that my resolutions are mainly all out, wandering orphaned in the world, neglected, abused, unconsidered). <BR> <BR> But this September feels different. I am starting to regret my lack of discipline. Since I've been serious about Spark P... Sun, 7 Sep 2014 19:17:17 EST Now more than ever.... <img src="">It's early September and I must renew my goals and become more disciplined. I've had a piece of very good news that makes me almost blush to admit: after three weeks approaching the North Pole, I have returned to reality. I gained a few pounds. And now I am working hard again. <BR> <BR> Yesterday I found out that along with two other faculty members, I will be in London from about May 1-June 6th of 2015 in what is known a... Sat, 6 Sep 2014 17:39:24 EST Victoria Mallory <img src=""> <BR> <BR> She was a magical, luminous person of rare kindness and sweetness. She is gone too soon. <BR> September 1949-August, 2014 Thu, 4 Sep 2014 21:25:41 EST "Having a Baby Can Be a Scream" My thoughts are with Joan Rivers and I hope that she can pull through--to one side or the other. <BR> <BR> I had never heard her name before. The library had a "new book" called "Having a Baby Can Be a Scream". It was a time when I was fairly isolated. I lived in a new town and had no friends and the neighbors were not especially congenial. My mother was half way around the world in one of her Peace Corps volunteer assignments. My mother-in-law was (probably) worried that I was ruinin... Sat, 30 Aug 2014 13:13:41 EST Have I learned to love nature? <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I've always loved to travel but my goals have been to go to cities to see art museums, architecture, concerts, and pay tribute to the great minds of the past. <BR> <BR> This time I chose nature. <BR> <BR> And I loved it! Just staring at the contrast between the deep green or blue fjords and the mountains towering above was enough for me. We stopped at a reindeer crossing and waited for them to pass (my camera j... Sun, 24 Aug 2014 12:07:15 EST I'm back <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I've been away for almost two months---and just got back this morning at 1 AM. The best part of the journey was going along the Norwegian fjords--I took this photo of Geiranger Fjord from above. <BR> <BR> We made it past the 80th parallel north--almost to the 83rd but had to turn back because of dense fog. It was great to see all the ice floes and to sense the isolation. And of course it was cold. <BR> <BR> ... Sat, 23 Aug 2014 14:52:08 EST A helpful bit of advice <img src=""> Sat, 17 May 2014 14:59:07 EST Heirloom tomatoes! <img src=""> Thu, 15 May 2014 19:03:37 EST A concise idea that helps <img src=""> Wed, 7 May 2014 13:39:55 EST BLC 25 Goals <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I want to focus on consolidating the things I have learned since being on Spark People: <BR> <BR> 1) The importance of intentional exercise, at least 5 days a week. <BR> <BR> 2) Healthy eating for me (this might not be the same for you). <BR> <BR> 3) Accept the fact that I am a slow loser but focus on doing all the work necessary anyhow. <BR> <BR> 4) Remember that for me--with several chronic and ultimatel... Mon, 5 May 2014 12:40:12 EST The Oatmeal Diet: Day 6 <img src=""> <BR> <BR> In the spirit of David Letterman, I'll provide a top ten list for why I like the oatmeal diet: two meals a day are totally oatmeal. I use the steel-cut kind, which take about 30 minutes to cook. <BR> <BR> 1. You can make a large amount and microwave them for individual meals. <BR> <BR> 2. Oats are very very low on the gylcemic index. <BR> <BR> 3. This kind of hot cereal is filling and has a fairly quick sat... Sat, 3 May 2014 19:08:56 EST P.A.W.S.E. Week 1 P -- PLAN, PREPARE <BR> A -- ACT <BR> W -- WRITE <BR> S -- SET <BR> E--EXECUTE <BR> <BR> <img src=""> <BR> <BR> P - I am going to try--for at least two weeks and perhaps longer--a modified oatmeal diet. I will have a half-cup of whole grain cereal for lunch and for dinner (along with plenty of freggies and some protein). It seems really counter-intuitive because I am a diabetic but I can adjust my insulin. <BR> <BR> A - I've made som... Wed, 30 Apr 2014 19:34:56 EST A poem wot I wrote.... <img src="">For Bill Macauley, Who Sleeps in Class <BR> <BR> Bill’s eyelashes, filigreed, weight-pressed by sleep, <BR> Are small sticky fronds creeping downwards and deep <BR> Is the haze between my voice and his face. <BR> His eyelids are armor; his eyelids are lace. <BR> <BR> I speak of the Jazz Age, of Gatsby and Nick. <BR> Some freshmen are polished; their questions are slick. <BR> They’re feminists, radicals, Marxists, and fay; <... Sun, 27 Apr 2014 19:03:28 EST As Time Goes By... <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Hey you! You there! You with the pretty little babies! You with the wonderful career! You with the eating issues! <BR> <BR> You! I'm talking to you! I've put on my Travis Bickle outfit and state of mind. Today I want to tell you something---it all speeds by! That pretty baby in your arms will soon enough be a 60 year old! That wonderful career will end up with a retirement card! If you are public spir... Sat, 26 Apr 2014 12:54:31 EST The Alphabetical ME <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <BR> A is for ABOVE and BEYOND...Does competition give you an extra push? Yes, it gives me an incentive to do well and to keep on improving. <BR> <BR> B is for BLC rounds... Newbie?(first BLC round) Oldie?(1-3 rounds) Goldie?(long time BLCer)? Former BLC team(s)? I started for two rounds as a Shamrock Sheriff and am grateful to the team; I then moved into leadership with the Violet Team (and discovered that lead... Thu, 24 Apr 2014 21:05:53 EST A Message to ponder <img src=""> Sun, 20 Apr 2014 17:33:54 EST Wilkins Macawber's good financial advice <img src="">"Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen pounds nineteen and six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds nought and six, result misery." <BR> [The amounts quoted are £20.00, £19.975 and £20.025, in the United Kingdom's present, decimal, currency] <BR> <BR> Wilkins Macawber is a character from "David Copperfield" who lives on optimism. <BR> <BR> My daughter-in-law l... Mon, 14 Apr 2014 18:42:01 EST Couture? Alexander McQueen? How did that happen? <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Spark People (and many other websites) have targeted ads. I am familiar with getting pop-up ads for fairly low-budget clothing for plus-sized women. Sometimes if I look up something on the Internet I will get an ad for that---I did some research about 7 months ago into a Holiday Inn in Paris that a member of my BLC-team was visiting. The Holiday Inn in Paris kept popping up on my page for a couple of weeks inv... Sat, 5 Apr 2014 19:05:44 EST I Don't Want Them! <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Yesterday I briefly---very briefly--toyed with the idea of eating some sweets. And I spent the rest of the day feeling very good that I had ignored the impulse. <BR> <BR> And I woke up feeling good this morning. <BR> <BR> I have established--and I am on a streak--a hierarchy of eating (not counting regular meals): If I have an impulse to eat I must go through carrots, an apple, celery sticks, and THEN think abo... Fri, 4 Apr 2014 09:28:04 EST "We Don't Want You" <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I'm looking forward to a break from work. I'm excited about having some free time and I was thinking of ways to nourish my soul and my mind (in addition to all the ways I use Spark to nourish my body). I applied to be a member of a book club and they rejected me. I felt so ashamed and dismissed. I had really wanted to join this group and thought it would be a perfect match for me. But I was wrong. They said ... Thu, 3 Apr 2014 19:00:36 EST Red Fruits are the way to go <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Tomorrow is the weigh-in day for the Biggest Loser Challenge and my subversive little mind is fixating on salty white carbs..... Tue, 1 Apr 2014 22:35:56 EST "The Journey" The Journey <BR> <BR> by Mary Oliver <BR> <BR> One day you finally knew <BR> what you had to do, and began, <BR> though the voices around you <BR> kept shouting <BR> their bad advice— <BR> though the whole house <BR> began to tremble <BR> and you felt the old tug <BR> at your ankles. <BR> "Mend my life!" <BR> each voice cried. <BR> But you didn't stop. <BR> You knew what you had to do, <BR> though the wind pried <BR> with its stiff fingers <BR> at the very foundations, <BR> t... Mon, 31 Mar 2014 12:19:45 EST Wintry Mix and Spring-like emotions <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Winter refuses to leave but I am still feeling good. I've made some emotional progress and that has helped. I am gearing up to step up a notch or two or three--both emotionally, physically, and in terms of weight loss. 2013 was not a great year for weight loss, but I lost inches (most especially on my waist, which is a planet-sized globe dangling pendulously over my thighs). <BR> <BR> New beginnings are just ... Sun, 30 Mar 2014 20:17:21 EST I understand my passive-aggressive inspired binge <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Yesterday I had a brush with a passive-aggressive person. The scenario is that I say something about the world in general and what puzzles me or what I think. And the person responds, more or less, with "You don't like me". Or "You make me feel like quitting." I am flabbergasted. Let's say I'm talking about the excellent schools in Finland and this person responds that (because she went to school in Japan or ... Wed, 26 Mar 2014 09:12:48 EST The North and the Sun <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> I am thinking about August. I decided---perhaps a little madly---that I longed for the North (this was before our long winter started). It's really costly to go to the North Pole, so I settled on Svalbard, Norway. <BR> <BR> From the web site: <BR> "What kinds of wildlife are found in Svalbard? <BR> <BR> Wildlife in Svalbard are arctic fox, different kinds of seals, beluga, minke whale, mouse, polar ... Wed, 19 Mar 2014 14:43:45 EST What do you want to do with the rest of your life?? <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I am asking myself that question. I am still thinking about it. Some things are obvious, but others are not so clear. Mon, 17 Mar 2014 16:14:40 EST Marcus Aurelius <img src=""> <BR> <BR> <BR> <BR> from Book One of MEDITATIONS by Marcus Aurelius <BR> <BR> From my grandfather Verus I learned good morals and the government of my temper. <BR> <BR> From the reputation and remembrance of my father, modesty and a manly character. <BR> <BR> From my mother, piety and beneficence, and abstinence, not only from evil deeds, but even from evil thoughts; and further, simplicity in my way of living, far r... Sun, 16 Mar 2014 09:58:51 EST Mid March Meditation <img src=""> <BR> <BR> Just to get this out here: I have gone a long time without white carbs -- it's been almost a month. During the first week I lost a few pounds quickly. But then the weight loss has stalled. I now need to figure out how to tweak my diet some more. I've been thinking more and more about how I must extricate food from the pleasure equation. <BR> <BR> I can find deep pleasure in poetry, art, contemplation, exerc... Thu, 13 Mar 2014 19:23:31 EST Nicely organized citrus fruits <img src=""> <BR> <BR> I've been working on my Pinterest collection. I started it only recently. After a computer died (suddenly) I realized that I really wanted to have a permanent place to store my pictures. You can create private and / or public collections on Pinterest. Sun, 9 Mar 2014 16:39:33 EST A good picture <img src=""> Fri, 7 Mar 2014 20:44:33 EST See words 1 and 2 1. Kummerspeck (German) <BR> Excess weight gained from emotional overeating. Literally, grief bacon. <BR> <BR> 2. Shemomedjamo (Georgian) <BR> You know when you’re really full, but your meal is just so delicious, you can’t stop eating it? The Georgians feel your pain. This word means, “I accidentally ate the whole thing." <BR> <BR> 3. Tartle (Scots) <BR> The nearly onomatopoeic word for that panicky hesitation just before you have to introduce someone whose name you can't quite remember. <B... Thu, 6 Mar 2014 12:02:01 EST A loveable lamb <img src=""> <BR> <BR> This little lamb has attitude, stance, and a touch of pugnaciousness! I wish I were as ready to meet the world as this lamb.... Tue, 4 Mar 2014 11:09:14 EST The simple elegance and artistry of food <img src=""> Mon, 3 Mar 2014 23:00:09 EST Thoughts after a good week of clean eating... Here is what I need to be sure to do: <BR> <BR> <BR> 1) Making sure that I get to the gym at least 5x a week. I can and do work out at home, but I really need the machines that provide weight training and the really super-duper treadmills, ellipticals, and rowing machines. They work me harder than I can work myself. <BR> <BR> 2) I think that white flour is the key to failure. If I can avoid bread and crackers--basically anything with flour--I suffer from far fewer cravings. <BR> <BR> 3) ... Thu, 27 Feb 2014 18:56:13 EST SMART Goals for BLC-24 Review your SMART Goal & tweak if needed <BR> About 6 weeks ago I listed these goals: they need a good tweaking! <BR> <BR> January: My Goal: <BR> I want to get back to caring about my goals; right now I am very apathetic about just about everything (except my cats). I need the "spark" to care about health and weight loss. I need to get back into the mindset where I think about it all the time. <BR> February 24: My goal <BR> I think I am FINALLY back into that Spark. It took me a while... Mon, 24 Feb 2014 13:51:41 EST National Priorities Quote from Senator Bernie Sanders, 2.19.14: <BR> <BR> "In America today, the top 1% owns 38% of our country’s financial wealth. The bottom 60% owns all of 2.3%. In the last several years, 95% of all new income has gone to the top 1%. Sadly, we recently learned that in 2012 the top 40 hedge fund managers in the country earned $16.7 billion dollars, as much as 300,000 public school teachers combined -- almost a third of all high school teachers in America. How’s that for national priorities!" Sat, 22 Feb 2014 13:44:12 EST