50SGRANNY's SparkPeople Blog http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal.asp?id=50SGRANNY 50SGRANNY's Blog on SparkPeople, home of free diet plans and a healthy living community SparkPeople.com http://assets2.sparkpeople.com/assets/nav/logo_spark.gif http://www.sparkpeople.com/ Acceptance, and new goals... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5463293 I've finally figured out that I can be happy with a weight-loss goal of 1/2 (that's one half, or 0.5; not one or two) pound per week. It's been really hard for me to accept that number, so I've been fighting it, or getting frustrated and giving up. It seems unfair because I am working SO hard for this (when I'm not throwing in the towel and binge-eating) that I felt I should be able to see those high numbers that others do, at least some times. But I can't compare my progress with that of ... Thu, 22 Aug 2013 17:01:43 EST Just checking in - oh, and the GRANDCHILDREN ARE COMING! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5437843 Well, two of the four grandchildren are coming, anyway. They are so grown up, they are flying here together, with no adults! Julien (JuJu) has been flying alone since he was 4 or 5, but I think this is Jerina's (Rina) first trip without an adult. They are growing up so fast! <BR> <BR> Of course, I'm ALWAYS hurt when JuJu comes for a visit, but at least I can get around pretty well, and even without much pain most of the time, so I'm looking forward to having a great time with them! <BR> ... Mon, 29 Jul 2013 21:10:12 EST Back...and Better! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5425475 When I posted last, I was all depressed and full of self-loathing; worried about my aged parents, and had basically stopped caring for myself. That translates into emotional eating and vegging on the couch (or wherever I could veg). After spending a week with my dad and his wife, as well as ALL my siblings (5), I am feeling much better. All the problems I had still exist, but that little break from feeling like I was dealing with everything alone did wonders for me. Nothing has changed but my... Thu, 18 Jul 2013 14:47:40 EST Sometimes it's just Overwhelming... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5415914 I'm trying to stay on track, but failing rather miserably. I hate making excuses, but my life is truly unmanageable right now. I mean, just...wow...no words can describe all these thoughts flying around inside my head. <BR> <BR> OK, so I'll start with my dad. I just had a very nice Father's Day dinner with him, and he looked rather pale and maybe a little jaundiced, but he's in kidney failure, so it's to be expected. However, he was unusually sentimental, and announced repeatedly how lucky h... Tue, 9 Jul 2013 20:03:02 EST Finishing up Day 5 with some news about the purported "Dehydration Myths" http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5404939 Now that Day 5 of the Summer Challenge for the Spark Solution is nearing an end, I'll do a little evening update. First, I did what I said I was not going to do, and I did exercise that stressed my ankle. But, to be fair, I thought it might not hurt me. I thought wrong. Again. Although I am fairly sure I didn't do any additional damage, I maybe should have stuck with my original resolve to go easy on the ankle and stick with chair workouts until it had healed. BUT, if you had seen this video ... Fri, 28 Jun 2013 20:48:33 EST Summer Challenge for the Spark Solution day 4 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5404636 <BR> Day for didn't go as well for me. I didn't plan well, so was spending too much time figuring out what to eat and how to prepare it...and waiting until I was hungry to do any of it. BAD choice! In addition, I watched TV, which never leads to good things, but this time in particular because I was watching the latest episodes of "Master Chef" - while I was hungry. My planning takes a little extra time because my calorie range is lower than that of the challenge meal plan due to my age and ... Fri, 28 Jun 2013 13:00:19 EST Spark Solution Summer Challenge Day 3 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5403026 I feel as though I'm just stepping into the Twilight Zone because I could swear I saw a Day 3 thread on that Challenge page earlier this evening, but now it's gone. I've been pretty out of sorts today, but I didn't think I was THAT bad! <BR> <em>40</em> <BR> I guess I'll just put my info here then, and maybe when get up in the morning it will have moved over to that page all by itself. <BR> <BR> <BR> Q: Today we asked you to eat away from the computer and TV. Did you do it? What did ... Wed, 26 Jun 2013 23:55:32 EST Granny's Top 10 Chair Workouts! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5399183 The sprained ankle is coming along as well as expected, which is not as quickly as I'd like, of course. I can view this as an opportunity, a lesson from whichever source I'm listening to, that I need to focus on patience and acceptance first, before I get all caught up in making changes. I mean, I *can* view it as an opportunity, and I should. Instead, I chose to view it as a challenge for a while, hence probably slowing down my recovery time a bit. <BR> <em>40</em> <BR> Once I renewed ... Sun, 23 Jun 2013 13:59:13 EST June 20, AKA 9 days since the ankle sprain http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5396428 It seems like it's been much longer, although there is no doubt that it's getting better. I just get frustrated and really want to get back to my high energy workouts. I KNOW it's possible to get a cardio workout without relying on standing, jogging, walking, jumping (ok, I don't really jump much), but I'm having a heck of a time finding out how. I have searched SP, YouTube, and the Internet in general, looking for ideas. I found a lot of them, but most of them won't work for me, for one reas... Thu, 20 Jun 2013 14:46:36 EST Pros and Cons of Chair Workouts http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5392036 Although I have been alternating between feeling sorry for myself and "going to the mat" (finally forced to get down on the floor to exercise) I still needed to find a way to get some cardio in, so I chose SP's Seated Cardio Workout to begin with. I mean, it's SP, right? I can't really say that I felt a good cardio burn with it, but I could have modified it or repeated it, so it's on me that I didn't feel the cardio. What I DID feel was my glutes and lower back, especially, screaming at me. N... Mon, 17 Jun 2013 12:54:11 EST No More Excuses! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5390642 I am seriously going to get a personal thank you to all Sparkies who have left me such warm words of encouragement. <BR> <em>304</em> <BR> But for now, I want to retract all of my previous self-pity ramblings - that's not me. At least, it's not really me *any more*. I mean, I have suffered periods of depression, but I am not really quite in that state now; I guess I was just feeling sorry for myself. I do have a ton of stuff going on, some of which I have no control, but a lot of which I ... Sun, 16 Jun 2013 09:38:12 EST Thank you, thank you, thank you! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5388433 Thanks to everyone who responded to my last post, affirming that my Spark friends really are always here for me! <BR> <em>252</em> <BR> I didn't disappear again, I am truly just too busy...albeit a great deal of that activity is inside my head...to keep up with these posts on a daily basis right now. I have a ton of family matters which are consuming my thoughts and my time, but I really have been trying to get myself firmly on track again. Or even semi-firmly on track. The main thing is,... Thu, 13 Jun 2013 21:42:14 EST This isn't how it looks... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5379386 Well, maybe it is how it looks, but not entirely. I mean, I've never given any thought to just giving up (this time), but I just couldn't get my head back in the game after my CA trip last month. Without going into details, by the time I got back home I was nothing but depressed. I had only minimal interest in working out, definitely not enough interest to actually DO anything, and I had even less interest in my diet and nutrition program. This is all bad...but the good news is, I'm still her... Wed, 5 Jun 2013 17:09:21 EST Still Kicking! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5352013 Yesterday I talked about nearly killing myself from overexertion (huge exaggeration) and being fatigued and sore for two days, unable to really work out, doing a LOT of sleeping and wondering how much of that was attributable to the exertion and how much was just more of the chronic pain I've been dealing with these past few years. Well, now I've decided (drum roll).....................................<BR>....................................... <BR> <BR> I'm still not sure. The good news is,... Fri, 10 May 2013 10:50:34 EST Pushing too hard or fibromyalgia? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5350923 I am honestly not sure what the problem has been these past couple days, but there has definitely been a problem. Without a specific diagnosis of fibromyalgia, I am claiming it as the most likely cause of this chronic pain, fatigue, stress, anxiety, depression, migraines, "fog", and other symptoms I've been dealing with, more and more as time goes by. I had made the decision, just a couple days ago, that I would just have to workout as much and as hard as I could, WHEN I could, to make up for... Thu, 9 May 2013 11:48:24 EST SPARK SOLUTION is Here! (and updates and stuff) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5348580 Hurrah! The Spark Solution is here! I had to force myself to stop reading it this morning, because I have a busy day planned already. It is plain to see that I am going to really love this book though :) <BR> <em>48</em> <BR> "Spark Coach Daily Visualization: <BR> Imagine stepping on the scale to find that your weight hasn't budged. Instead of immediately reacting with self-hatred and disgust, you remain calm and focus on the positive. What other accomplishments can you be proud of? Use t... Tue, 7 May 2013 12:03:22 EST Take That, Sneaky Pounds! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5346054 OK, so the scale showed a 4 pound loss two days ago, but today it shows that 2 of those pounds are still hovering nearby, and apparently landing on me and trying to hide themselves in all the other pounds, hoping to go unnoticed. I'm sure they are planning to settle in and get comfortable, and then call back the other lost pounds until they have all just made themselves a permanent home. HA! Not this time, flabby fatty pounds! I'm in the driver's seat and I'm driving you away. <BR> <BR> Yeah... Sun, 5 May 2013 09:28:18 EST SparkCoach Jen's Signature http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5340676 "You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing that we call "failure" is not the falling down but the staying down." Mary Pickford <BR> <BR> I'm borrowing this quote from Coach Jen's signature line because it's exactly what I needed right now. I keep feeling like such a failure, even though I know better, intellectually speaking anyway. But here's how the story went, this time around... <BR> <BR> I have a wedding to attend in California in a couple weeks, and when I was s... Tue, 30 Apr 2013 11:44:03 EST Not Really MIA, Just Taking Time to Heal http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5339283 That's about it. OK, I also did a LOT of emotional eating, no doubt gained back the little bit of weight I lost (we'll see), and just had a major set-back. BUT, I still haven't quit or given up entirely, I guess I just gave up for that time. I need to learn how to avoid the emotional eating, as well as the "all or nothing" mentality, because that's the cause of all my set-backs. I was unable to workout to my fullest ability, so I didn't bother at all. Since I wasn't working out, I didn't both... Mon, 29 Apr 2013 10:26:56 EST Just Checking In http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5329200 This abscess is significantly worse than I had thought, albeit getting better and better. I will probably end up getting this tooth pulled next week, which should put an end to all this. <BR> <BR> As things currently stand, the swelling in my face has gone down, from soccer ball size to just a mild case of mumps, maybe. <em>29</em> <BR> <BR> The pain has actually moved away from my tooth (thank heavens, that was some horrendous pain!) on to the mumps-looking affected area, including my e... Fri, 19 Apr 2013 23:21:54 EST Always Something! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5326575 I'm really feeling motivated again, eating, breathing, dreaming about Spark People and Fitness and Healthy Foods. Good thing, too, since I'm a bit under the weather right now (really, just a ginormous abscess that's got my face swollen like a basketball), I need a lot of motivation in reserve, since I've been advised NOT to do strenuous exercise right now, but to save my body's energy for healing for a few days. I can live with that, it's not like I'm on bed rest, or unable to exercise *at al... Wed, 17 Apr 2013 14:27:52 EST 7 side effects of drinking diet soda http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5324876 I stopped drinking soda years ago, but not before I had already damaged my teeth, kidneys, and probably my bones as well. I urge my spark friends to stop using diet soda to replace sugary soda, or as a no calorie sweet treat. The things it's doing to your body is NO treat! <BR> <BR> Please click the following link to see just 7 of the effects of drinking this "treat". <BR> <BR> <link>healthyliving.msn.com/health-wellnes<BR>s/7-side-effects-of-drinking-diet-soda </link> Tue, 16 Apr 2013 08:16:41 EST Choose "Happy" Foods! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5323496 <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/5/4/l547073994.jpg"> Mon, 15 Apr 2013 03:38:47 EST Moderation...??? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5322661 Today's Spark Coach community assignment: <BR> "Journal or blog about an area of your lifestyle that needs moderation. What can you do to change your attitude--and future outcomes?" <BR> What an apt topic, considering the fact that I have just entered into the Tame Your Sweet Tooth challenge. I am clearly having trouble with moderation. In fact, I have trouble with moderation in everything I do, so it's always an "all or nothing" attitude I'm fighting. If I'm going to do something, I'm going... Sun, 14 Apr 2013 10:20:36 EST Tame Your Sweet Tooth Challenge http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5322143 I have entered the Tame Your Sweet Tooth Challenge with the hope of getting my sugar cravings under control. It might be just in time - or too late. Last night, while in the midst of an evening snack attack / chocolate craving, I decided to see if I could figure out a way to get some chocolate in me. The only chocolate I have here is cocoa powder, because that's all I could trust myself with - or so I thought. But through experimentation I learned that I could add melted butter to the cocoa p... Sat, 13 Apr 2013 20:24:43 EST Rest Days and Ginger Snaps http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5320721 So yesterday was a R&R (rest and recovery) day – and I had a box of ginger snaps in my kitchen. That set things off and the rest of the day was just a downward spiral. R&R days alone are enough to make temptation irresistible, but add a little sugar and I’m out of control! Today I will have to be doubly diligent to make up for yesterday’s “slip” so that Monday’s weigh in is good to me. I'm also still sore from Wednesday's workout(s), but not sore enough to skip working out today, so I'll just... Fri, 12 Apr 2013 11:09:01 EST Accidental Maintenance First http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5319370 Did you catch this DailySpark blog this morning? "Should You Maintain Your Weight before You Lose?" After I read it (oh, what the heck - WHILE I was reading it) I thought to myself (because that's who I usually think to if I'm thinking "to" someone) "Debbie, ('cause that's what I call myself when I'm thinking to myself, just in case I might get confused and think that I'm thinking to someone els...oh, never mind) this looks like the same thing you were doing during those times when you swore... Thu, 11 Apr 2013 08:39:46 EST All Systems Go, but Possible Danger Ahead! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5318302 Wow, this really does work if you do it right! That’s 11 lbs. lost now (but my official weigh-in day isn't until Monday, so keep this on the DL). Surely no record weight loss, but it’s a little more than a pound per week since I climbed back on the wagon on January 27, so I’ll take it, considering my record as of the past few years. It looks like I’m finally officially post-menopausal, and my body has adjusted to the change. Well, that, and I’m putting everything I’ve got into my workouts aga... Wed, 10 Apr 2013 11:24:38 EST Aches, Pains, and Inflammation, oh my! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5315566 So I'm thinking I may have waited a little too long to try to improve my health and fitness. Now it seems to be more a matter of keeping up with the deterioration than improving what I already had - once. For example, I am blessed with unexplained hip pain that has stayed with me for over a year. This means that many of the exercises I wish to do cause pain - bummer. For the most part, I am able to work through the pain and even loosen the joint a bit, so I feel better for the exercise. But l... Mon, 8 Apr 2013 09:25:47 EST Oh come ON! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5312334 I just spent a grueling, emotional hour writing a blog post...ALL in my own words, by the way, but when I clicked "Post Blog Entry" it would not post. Instead, I got a pop-up window that read "No HTML Please" and my post had vanished! It was important information to get out there, too, so I'll just have to do it again - soon. After I've had some more rest (as the post was in regard to the importance of rest / recovery days and the negative impact of not taking them). <BR> <BR> EDIT: April 7 ... Fri, 5 Apr 2013 08:38:05 EST Peeps Survival http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5307410 I managed to make it through "Peep Season" without succumbing to the temptation of sticky, gooey, fire roasted marshmallow peeps. This in itself is an accomplishment worthy of celebration! <BR> <img src="http://photos-ak.sparkpeople.com/nw/7/1/l71696097.jpg"> Mon, 1 Apr 2013 11:19:23 EST April Fools! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5307342 April 1, 2013 <BR> This is from Spark Coach today: <BR> <BR> Daily Visualization <BR> <BR> “Today, imagine your "future self" giving your past (or current) self a hug. See your future self thanking your past self for having the courage to move forward in this healthy lifestyle journey. How does it feel to look back on your former self with new eyes?” <BR> <BR> This really means a lot to me, as I have never seen things this way. I have always considered my past or current self to be the los... Mon, 1 Apr 2013 10:34:24 EST Here We Go Again! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5305253 I have been struggling like crazy, trying to get with the program, failing every attempt. I just found it impossible to stay focused and on track for long enough to do anything I could call working toward my goals. I knew I needed an attitude adjustment, but just couldn't get there. It seemed that my entire life had become unmanageable, and I just felt "stuck". Beyond that, I gained over 50 pounds during the time that I was just trying to lose some weight and improve my health. <BR> <BR> Rec... Sat, 30 Mar 2013 11:05:21 EST September 8, 2012 http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5050190 I have been trying to figure out why I'm already "slipping" so much, and/or lacking motivation. It all started with the wretched back troubles, but my back is doing much better and I am STILL not back on program! Not only that, but I'm not feeling any inclination to GET back on track, although I am still feeling the frustration of not following through, once again. It's not even so much that I find excuses not to exercise or follow my nutritional goals, I just don't do it. I want to do it,... Sat, 8 Sep 2012 20:32:27 EST Improving http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5044202 Well, my back seems to finally be getting better, so I was able to get out for a walk today - FINALLY. I'm hoping things will continue to improve so that I can get fully on-track soon. Perhaps this little glitch was nature's way of preventing me from trying to do too much too soon, and to learn to exercise patience as well as my body! Tue, 4 Sep 2012 15:42:33 EST OWWW, My aching back! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5033702 I've been having a few bad days here (due to family troubles and self-discipline troubles) and was just getting back on track when I threw my back out. OK, didn't actually "throw it out", and I don't think it was actually my back either, lol. I *think* it's more like my, but what I know is that it hurts like crazy to walk, sit, lie down, or even move. I have still been walking around the apartment as much as I can, hoping that will help it heal faster (or at all), but definitely not exercisin... Mon, 27 Aug 2012 20:18:49 EST SparkCoach Assignment: Easy Meal List http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5030328 I apologize if anyone came here looking for a list of easy meals, I haven't started the list yet, am just bookmarking the page for now. Sat, 25 Aug 2012 10:04:53 EST Nothing can stop me now! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5025446 OK, so I couldn't stand it and finally got back onto the scale, despite swearing I wouldn't. As (always) expected, the numbers showed a weight gain. There have been times in the past when one bad weigh-in like this would be enough to discourage me to the point of giving up, but not this time! <BR> <BR> In the past, I would have urgently tried to determine the cause of the weight gain, and immediately started trying to "correct" my plan by cycling calories, changing my workouts, or following ... Tue, 21 Aug 2012 21:06:43 EST Renewed Goals and Action Plan http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5019183 GOALS <BR> <BR> 1. Stop allowing the scale to dictate the way I feel and interfere with my motivation! (SCALE = <BR> <BR> Sinister Contraption Allows Loss of Esteem) <BR> <BR> 2. Lose pounds and inches <BR> <BR> 3. Feel and BE healthier <BR> <BR> 4. Lose most of my aches and pains <BR> <BR> <BR> ACTION PLAN <BR> <BR> 1. Put the scale away, only take it out for weekly weigh-ins and don't expect to see a loss every week, sometimes there might be a gain, and that's just the way it is. <... Fri, 17 Aug 2012 09:27:19 EST Commitment Renewed http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=5015278 It's been a long time since I've shown my face around these parts. Oh, I've checked in from time to time, but never made my presence known. I just wasn't ready, and I knew that if I were to come back to my teams and friends, I would only end up disappointing myself and feeling like a failure. Again. And there were other things on my to-do list anyway, so I ticked some of those off while trying to get into the right mindset to tackle this venture again. I believe I am finally in the frame of ... Tue, 14 Aug 2012 14:39:03 EST Slowly crawling back onto the wagon... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2805990 You may have noticed that my last blog entry was on July 4, 2009. That was a nasty decade though...glad I get a fresh start! And it's about time, now that January is nearly over with, I'm really feeling an urgency to make things HAPPEN, and this is the best place to begin. I need a job...but I need to renew my self confidence and self esteem more, maybe even first (although I REALLY need a job). <BR> <BR> I've been dealing with depression through escapism, and many of you (those of you ... Wed, 27 Jan 2010 19:42:54 EST Motivation is SO important to stay motivated! (who knew?) http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2201960 Keeping this short and sweet. I have been allowed "stuff" to keep me preoccupied, and haven't been doing my usual "daily SP stuff". I'm having a flare-up of an old medical problem (digestive system), I can't hike because I broke my toe, and the weather's too crappy for the beach - or for my mental health, for that matter. So I've just been hanging around the house, eating as well as I can manage right now, and...well, not much more than that. The attitude just went to hell. <BR> <BR> So... Sat, 4 Jul 2009 09:39:43 EST Banished SCALE: continued http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2168326 By now we all know all about my obsessive personality. Not OCD, because, although I do obsess, and my thoughts may become consumed by the obsession du jeur, I am not quite obsessed enough to become compulsive about ACTING on it, I just spend WAY too much time thinking about it (whatever "it" may be...in this case, obviously, diet/exercise/weight loss). The SCALE was the main instigator of my weight loss obsession, so I removed it from the equation. I have not yet decided how long it is to ... Sun, 21 Jun 2009 10:13:05 EST SparkPeople - what's right with the world today! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2149311 The outpouring of support I've gotten here is just amazing! I have a lot of people to thank, and plan to do just that, but it will probably take me awhile to get to everyone. For now, I just wanted to let everyone know I "heard" you, and appreciate all the comments. You SparkPeople are all simply wonderful! <BR> <BR> I have more to say, as always, but need to get going on my morning exercises and walk before it gets any later. I love you all, and I'll be back later today to share my thoug... Sun, 14 Jun 2009 10:16:51 EST I'm sorry - I just can't do this any more http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2144961 Maybe I haven't given up completely, but I've become obsessed with losing weight, and it just isn't happening. At ALL. This means that each and every day I feel like a failure, and I just really need to take a break from that. At this point, seeing "I've lost another pound!" (or more)....or "I've hit another milestone!" would be just the thing I need to make me go ballistic and start killing people. So, for the sake of humanity, I'm taking a break. <BR> <BR> I am removing the bathroom sc... Fri, 12 Jun 2009 10:01:18 EST ANOTHER fresh start? Hope there's not a limit on these! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2136030 No more whining (for now, heh-heh). My new formula for making this thing work is an about face. Exercise LESS (as atrocious as that sounds to a compulsive person such as myself) and cut back on my calories again. That really should have been obvious all along... I mean, what old lady on a diet really needs 2,000 calories per day?!! Duh! Sometimes I amaze myself these days, how could I have gotten this stupid? Oh, ok...that was pretty degrading...I guess. What I meant to say was, how c... Tue, 9 Jun 2009 09:32:22 EST According to RealAge.com... http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2132741 I've got such conflicting information and viewpoints that I really just don't know what to do...other than just getting back to exercising in an attempt to improve my health as much as I can, without worrying about my weight...since it (the weight) is only changing for the worse, when it changes at all lately. But no matter how many times I make the vow to forget about pounds and focus on health only, it still seems to come back to those numbers on the scale. Honestly, I really do believe t... Mon, 8 Jun 2009 10:02:08 EST OK, seriously...why do I even bother?!! http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2129689 It's been three months now that I've been at this...exercising faithfully, watching and logging everything I eat, staying below my calorie range...and still no real weight loss. That belief that just getting healthier is more important than worrying about weight loss is starting to dwindle and fade. <BR> <BR> OF COURSE I WANT TO LOSE SOME WEIGHT!! I'm trying so hard! I just can't figure out where I'm going wrong, and all this failure is adding up and starting to get depressing. That, a... Sun, 7 Jun 2009 06:13:22 EST What's happening NOW? - continued http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2124803 AND.... I'm not sweating enough. Although I totally understand the importance of "mixing it up" rather than doing the same thing all the time in regards to exercise, I've gotten into a rut, and have been doing the same thing, day after day. And doing it for too long at a time to boot! It's time to make a new plan...again. Car problems keep me from getting to the beach, which was my "mix it up plan", but that's only one thing. I've got dozens and DOZENS of cardio exercise videos I could/sho... Fri, 5 Jun 2009 03:53:24 EST What's happening NOW? http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=2123268 I'm still gaining weight, even though I know I "shouldn't" be. I'm eating healthy - low calories, low fat, low sugar, low simple carbs, low everything it seems! Exercising a LOT, and gaining weight. SP has been "telling me" (via trackers) that I am burning too many calories for the amount I'm consuming, yet eating any more just seems to go against everything I've ever believed about nutrition and fitness. You eat when you're hungry - period. <BR> <BR> OK, that still makes sense to me, so ... Thu, 4 Jun 2009 14:37:40 EST