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Still There

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Well, this is week 21 with the Bells Palsy and I am feeling very down. The neurologist sent me for a consult with the ENT. He is ordering an EMG to figure out how much facial nerve and muscle damage has been done. He noted that this may be permanent which of course immediately sent me way down in the dumps. No matter how hard I try to get back up this week, I can't seem to do it. I can't imagine being stuck like this forever! I know, it is just a superficial thing, but none the less, I can't imagine it. 4 days ago, the right side of my face swelled and has not subsided. I guess the worst thing in eating and drinking - especially in front of anyone. It is just not a pretty site. Beverages dribble down my chin and I end up wearing most of it. j I use a straw, but since the swelling - I can't seem to close my mouth around it all the way. Eating is a site as well. I tend to bite my lip a lot if I don't move it out of the way when I go to eat. I can't chew with my mouth closed - since it doesn't close all the way. I know that attitude is everything and that it truly will go away some day but after 20 weeks it is very discouraging. I have prayed but I am not sure that God is listening these days. I am no longer sure what to do to get back to the optimistic self that I usually am. I guess I will take one day at a time and get on the treadmill more to burn of some frustration.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Going on 10 months now. I have started going to the chiropracter to see if he can help. Most of the time I forget about it but it is still visibly there. No big deal anymore. One day at a time.
    3512 days ago
    I am now in the 8th month of Bell's Palsy. It seems to have reached a standstill where it swells on some days and it ok on others. Once again the doctor told me that I would not recover in certain parts of my face but I have not lost hope yet. I have been massaging the facial areas affected with the massaging shower head every day now. I am trying to meditate a little to help with the stress of daily life. One day at a time and sometimes one minute at a time is all that I can do! Life could be much worse I know. I just take a look around and see people that can't walk or have had a stroke and their side affects are pretty much permenant. A lady at work's 3 year old grandson has a tumor in his brain and has to undergo chemotherapy. So sad for a 3 year old to have to endure! Life is good! And so is my attitude. My boss still lets me work at home as much as I need to. You can't ask for anything better than that. I feel a little fatigued these days, I think the thyroid is acting up again but it to can be treated.
    Thanks for listening.
    3569 days ago
    Well, I think it is a little better today. It is still there for the most part, but my mouth is not as droopy as it was. I can smile and you can't redily tell that I have Bells Palsy without looking closely. That is encouraging to me that it might get better especially after I was just told that certain parts of my face will not recover. I am feeling somewhat encouraged thoday.
    3639 days ago
    Feeling a little better today. Not sleeping well so I am tired but better. Have a plan for today to get on the treadmil and lift weights. I committed to 3 days a week 3 weeks ago and have only done it 1 week in a row. this is a new week and I know I can do it. Hybby said he would do it with me but that lasted 1 night. No expectation there, just had hoped he would really do it this time. I can do it myself and that is not a problem, just better to do it with someone.

    I am procrastinating on updating my ticker for weight. The prednisone and my lack of will power these days have made me put on 9pounds to date. Back up to 162! that is only 6 pounds from where I started. Ugh. I am off the meds now so I am eating better and less. It will come off but it will take time again. Lifetime commitment of healthy eating.
    3658 days ago
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