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I'm all out of love...who am I without you

Thursday, July 19, 2007

So, I've been dabbling in a bit of introspection in regards to my eating habits, and I stink! Let me give you a "for example." It illustrates the point just how out of control I was.

Last Friday, we had this competition going on at work for one of the accounts that I run. If they hit a certain sales goal, they could hit their choice of supervisor in the face with a pie. If the acheived a secondary goal, then they could opt to hit me with a pie...needless to say, we had an awesome day. The supervisors and I were destined to be hit in the face with pies.

So, out comes the supplies, and dammit if they didn't have the good kind fo whipped cream...the real deal. The kind of whipped cream with the nozel. The kind you can huff and get high...but that's another story from my college days!

So, They start filling up the pie tins with whipped cream, shhhhhhhhhhkrrrrrttttt....all those yummy white mounds of arterie hardening concupiscient goodness. Even the sound of the whipped cream being squirted out made me excited. I love whipped cream! I adore whipped cream! I lust for whipped cream! Whipped Cream...Je t'aim!!!!

So, I took the first one in the face ( no comment Lynn!) and I got a little in mouth ( again, no comment Lynn) and it tasted like heaven ( Hush, Lynn!). I wanted more ( Be quiet!)

So, while everyone was whooping and hollering and laughing at me covered in whipped cream. I started scooping the whipped cream off of my face and eating it...oh, it was delish!

So, again and again...I keep taking it in the face ( SHUT UP!!!!) with the pies and keep shoveling more and more into my mouth when I thought no one was looking. And it continued, until everyone who met their goal got a turn. As we were cleaning up, I discovered something: there was one bottle left that hadn't been touched.

So, I told them that I would tidy up and started throwing everything away. I tossed everything in the garbage bag, even the full bottle of whipped cream. It was, however, placed strategically! Once I got back to the dumpster, I pulled it out and tossed the rest of the bag in. I then made a beeline behind the dumpster and over the little hill behind it where no one would be able to see me.

And there, to my great shame...I drained the entire can of whipped cream. I felt so good, and I felt so bad. I was so ashamed of myself for my lack of control and hated myself so much in that one moment.

I don't have any sweets in the house, because I have no self control as I think I have aptly illustrated in the aforementioned anecdote of shame! But, there is progress....

I purchased almost three hundred dollars worth of candy for the people at work: M&M's, Snickers, Reeses pieces, Twix, cookies...you name it, and it is sitting right next to my desk. Now, I love reeses pieces with a passion! And I wanted some BAD, but I didn't have any. I didn't!!! Before I would have...but I actually didn't. I have some self control...it's going to come in baby steps, but I can do it! My lack of self control is monumental, so this is going to be a gigantic undertaking...

That abotu wraps it up for this blog...just a story of how I ended up here. Thanks for listenning. For me, telling these stories is kinda like therapy. Hopefully most of you will laugh, and maybe some relate...mostly I hope you the best of success.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JKSMOM 7/20/2007 12:16PM

    All true food addicts have hidden & eaten food. My food of choice was bacon cheese burgers on the way home from school, so that I could still eat supper that evening with the family. Thank goodness that was years ago, but I am still addicted to food!

I definitely love the nozzle whipped cream and that comes in fat free too! I wouldn't suggest the entire bottle though. If you allow yourself some on fat-free/sugar free icecream, you can feel like you're being decadent when your doing great!! You need to work in some healthy desserts or this life-change of eating habits won't stick. :o)

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LISAMA1981 7/19/2007 5:58PM

    your right...that stuff is definitely delicious!!!! can't say I would have had the will power to not eat any myself...you are wonderful though to not eat the resee's...your right that the will power will come in baby steps...like they say...we gained this weight and these bad habits over time, therefore we can't lose the weight and completely change our lives over night. Stick with it.

Good luck to you.
Lisa.

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SWEETY8513 7/19/2007 11:18AM

    wow love, do i understand or what!! when faced with a situation like that i typically have to sabatoge whatever I want that way I CAN NOT eat it-- like with mac and cheese-- i eat two bites and pour dishsoap in the rest of it... its embarrassing that I can not do it-- but ah well as for now I will do what I must-- and congrats with the reeses pieces they are wonderful!!! so major kudos for not eating them! you can do this just keep us updated-- oh and ps they have this wonderful tub whipped cream that is fat free and frozen-- different texture same taste and not NEARLY as bad for you--- try that and see if you like it-- GOOD LUCK!

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GENTILED 7/19/2007 8:06AM

    I promise i'm smiling. i don't eat the stuff out of the can, makes me sick...but i love it enough to have tried once or twice. :)

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KIMCAMP 7/19/2007 1:06AM

    Thanks for the smiles....my my my:)

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