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    BEAUTY_WITHIN   55,468
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SO self-conscious today!

Tuesday, September 02, 2014

I'm am feeling so self-conscious today. I'm dressing a bit outside of my comfort zone. I was shopping yesterday, and I got some cute shorts as a gift from my aunt (they're just a hair too big, maybe half a size or so), a midriff top that I really like (!) and some chunky heeled clogs. My husband thinks I look great. I'm REALLY self-conscious. I think I look good. I think...LOL. I feel like everyone's staring at me though logically I'm pretty sure they could give a hoot about what I'm wearing. It's been SO long since I've had the guts to wear anything that bares my midriff.
Combine that with the fact that I'm at Starbucks and eating lunch. I don't know why, but sometimes when I'm this self conscious, I fall back into the mindset that I shouldn't be eating anything but carrot sticks. I guess that's my mom's influence talking.
I'm trying really hard to keep the feel-good confident attitude up, but I'm having SUCH a hard time. Pictures are below. PLEASE be nice!!

Anyways, I could use some support today! Please! Thanks in advance!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUMPINJULIE 9/7/2014 8:56PM

    You look amazing I'm so happy for you on all you have lost. Its hard for me too build up my self confidence but we can do it.

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KPETSCHE 9/7/2014 2:55PM

    Just be yourself. If YOU aren't comfortable in your own skin then THAT's when you worry (or not) but don't change because of how you want other's to perceive you. Your hubby loves you just the way you are and probably mostly because of you, yourself. Be happy and enjoy yourself!!!

You look fantastic in those fall colors! Keep smiling emoticon

emoticon

Kelly

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BONNIEMARGAY 9/3/2014 12:12PM

    Grrl, put a coin scarf on and come shimmy with me!

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JUSTYNA7 9/3/2014 10:35AM

    I did the same thing! Well, a little less public. I was on a trip and they had a cute bra and bathing suit wrap in the airport that said XXXL in my colours for only $10. Holding them up they certainly didn't look that large but I thought, "what the heck, I can always get out the sewing machine. Alas when I got home and tried them on they were more like a "large" and the skirt would only just go around me instead of overlapping... and the bra while I could get it on was all "overflow". Recently I noticed it and pulled it out. The skirt I can tie now but it still does not "decently" overlap but the bra fits. It means my midriff shows. I put it on and it made me feel like I wanted to hold my belly in. Not a bad thing. Hubby seemed to really like it. I just wore it with capris, but was gardening in the back yard feeling very comfortable. Until I had to go to the front yard. I knd of kept behind shrubs and trees and did not make eye contact with anyone going by. I guess it is a process. It is more about trusting others to accept my body and not "hurt" me with remarks or looks. I know I am still obese but I also know how far I've come. I am very proud of this new body. But THEY don't know what I used to look like. Do I trust? No. Not yet.

However one of the inspiring people in my life was an elderly neighbour. One day I went over and she was in her underwear painting the back fence. She used to be a "beauty queen" as a teen and she laughed as she said people always wanted to see her in her underwear back then. But, she said "no one wants to see an 82 year old's body and that's too bad because I am stil the same person I was". But it was a hot day and she said "I'm comfortable" and that's what matters. I think she was right. Be comfortable!

Comment edited on: 9/3/2014 10:43:12 AM

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ICECUB 9/2/2014 6:40PM

    I THINK YOU ARE DOING WONDERFUL. WAY TO GO WITH LOSING. IT IS HARD TO KEEP CONFIDENT WHEN YOU ARE USE TO FEELING BAD ABOUT YOURSELF. BY THE WAY I LOVE STARBUCKS!! THEY DON'T SERVE FOOD HERE. JUST CAKES AND MUFFINS STUFF LIKE THAT. I LOVE THE CINNAMON MOCHA LATTE. IT IS ESPECIALLY GOOD WHEN IT IS COLD OUTSIDE.

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