Day 10 - 49, a good place
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
Birthdays are inevitable, - if you are lucky! I would rather take the birthday than the alternative!
I have been here for 49 years now. The number looks big but the time has passed quickly. I have mixed emotions about birthdays. I don't want to get older, but I do enjoy the festivities. This evening for example myself and hubbyand kids and their partners will be joining us in a restaurant to celebrate! There will be cake and the birthday song and candles and presents. I will be surrounded by birthday love! I love the love!!!! I mean who doesn't love feeling special?? I am very fortunate to be surrounded by people who love me and who I love back.
It makes me reflect on what is truly important. For many of my 49 years, I was caught up in how I looked. Did I have a roll on my tummy, were my hips too big? Was I skinny? Did I look fat ? When I consider what is important to me, I realize that what is really important is to have people around me to share love. Love does not consider how big my stomach is or how fat my thighs are. Love just is! Do I care about how complete strangers view me? Do I care if some guy walking down the street thinks I look fat??? Sadly, I used to. Now, I really don't! I have moved beyond that. My loved ones care for me, just me, bumps and all and that is all that really matters.
As I continue my journey, it is no longer about how I look but about the health of my body and how I feel. Now, don't get me wrong - I am still thrilled and amazed when I can slip into size 9 pants, but it is honestly not my primary concern anymore. I want my body to be strong and healthy! I want to run easily and faster! My body will shape itself as it will!
It has taken me 49 years to get to here. I think I have finally reached a state of acceptance of self and inner peace. 49 is a good place to be.