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    ILOVEROSES   237,907
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Friday, July 11, 2014

1. A man comes into the ER and yells. . .....
'My wife's going to have her baby in the cab.'
I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress and began to take off her underwear.
Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs - - - and I was in the wrong one.
Submitted by Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Francisco

2.... At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall.
'Big breaths,'. . . I instructed. 'Yes, they used to be,'. . . replied the patient.
Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle , WA

3.. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct.
Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a 'massive internal fart.'
Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg

4. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, 'How long have you been bedridden?'
After a look of complete confusion she answered . . . ' Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.'
Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson- Corvallis , OR

5. A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered..... It was quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery... When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed green and above it
there was a tattoo that read . .. .' Keep off the grass.'
Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the
patient's dressing, which said 'Sorry . . . had to mow the lawn.'
Submitted by RN no name,


Baby's First Doctor Visit

A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed.

'Breast-fed,' she replied...

'Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered.
She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination.

Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, 'No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.'

'I know,' she said, 'I'm his Grandma, but I'm glad I came.

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
IMEMINE1 7/29/2014 5:13PM


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FERRNIE 7/19/2014 5:29PM

  emoticon emoticon

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LITTLEWIND53 7/12/2014 12:24PM

    Oh, my goodness..... Some super gaff's there..... emoticon

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L*I*T*A* 7/11/2014 11:38PM

    emoticon emoticon

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ARTJAC 7/11/2014 10:32PM

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    OMG! These were beyond funny! Thanks!

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WALLAHALLA 7/11/2014 3:49PM


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SHANTODD420 7/11/2014 3:37PM

    Those are great thanks for sharing.

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1CRAZYDOG 7/11/2014 3:34PM

    Too cute!!!

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PDSLIM 7/11/2014 3:12PM


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NOTGVGUP83 7/11/2014 1:39PM

    lol great way to end a rough work week.

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PEGGYO 7/11/2014 12:07PM

    especially loved the last one

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123ELAINE456 7/11/2014 12:01PM

  LOL!!! Thank You.

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SQUIRRELMOMMA1 7/11/2014 11:49AM


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LIFENPROGRESS 7/11/2014 11:43AM


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LOSE4LIFE47 7/11/2014 10:11AM


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PHEBESS 7/11/2014 10:00AM

    Truth is funnier than fiction!!!!

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ALEXTHEHUN 7/11/2014 9:31AM

    Thanks for the good laugh!

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