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July, month of my biggest wish

Thursday, July 03, 2014

My biggest wish at the moment is that my tinnitus gets better.

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I don't care anymore what caused it, why it got worse after being better for a while, if there are more exams I could do - I gave up on getting answers.

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Now, I just wish the low sound, that has been very strong again ( a mix between a truck engine and a glass vibrating) would stop. I could keep the high sound (a mix between a whistle and a ringing), it almost doesn't bother me.

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But the low sound... it is killing me. It is extremely difficult to live with this sound all the time in my ear, and especially to fall asleep with it.

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I am very tired, I know there is nothing doctors can do and that this can be like this (or even worse) forever, and I try to keep my sanity by thinking about other things but sometimes I feel very fragile and very angry.

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So, July is the month of wishing this goes away. It got better once, so it is possible it gets better again.

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I wish...

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