Sunday, June 29, 2014
I've been here and there for a while now, mostly there. At some point I lost quite a bit of weight, and then I lost my motivation, regained my appetite, and gained a lot of it back.
I was sidetracked by personal loss, personal gain, life in general.
I'm here now. I'm ready to take back my motivation. I didn't lose it, really. I may have misplaced it for a while, but I've gone looking for it and I'm ready to continue this journey I started so long ago.
It's a lonely feeling, when you are convinced you're among the heaviest persons in the world (even when that's not close to the truth). When you are sure that no one else is struggling the way YOU struggle, you feel a sense of emptiness. It's ironic isn't it, that in trying to fill the sense of emptiness we feed the struggle? I eat, I feel empty, I feel empty, I eat. What a shameful cycle.
I intend to break that cycle. One day at a time.