Friday, June 13, 2014
The T from HALT was at play today BIG time - I am feeling so drained and tired from a week of about an average of 4 to 5 hours sleep...
And so the mind goes... the hunger grows, the cravings are there and I cave in - to tired to fight it mentally and actually enjoying the comfort of just being. It's just the easy way out I know and it's not what is going to get me the results I want.
My mind works the same way - I get into this mode and say 'one more night, one more day, one more treat/drink or whatever'... I say I will finish what I have and start fresh tomorrow and with good intentions that's what I said today and then I just was too tired to care... THIS is the pattern I must break.
So tonight I hope to get at least 7 hours of rest (my usual average is 6 to 7 and I'm good with that). I rarely am able to sleep 8 hours - it's just who I am.
I am planning on starting fresh - yet again - with this morning's blog and now this one - I'm posting to be accountable. I will be in bed early tonight because I am picking up my daughter at 8:30 instead of letting her come home around 10:30 which was the time she's been coming home most of the week.
I'm tired of fighting with her about curfew so we agreed to this time - and she's sticking to it. I'm also tired of nagging her about her school work - she has to hand in what she has on Monday and it will be what it is... she will either pass or fail her grade 7 and she'll have to deal with whatever the result is. We also have to return books on Monday - clean her locker out, etc. Busy times.
And so I'm fessing up and letting go for tonight. I'm looking forward to a good night's rest (I picked up my "Mental Calmness" tabs which I haven't had for some time and find helpful to rest better).
Thank you for your ongoing support SP friends...