Thursday, April 24, 2014
Today was just one of those days. Not the worst day ever, but definitely NOT a good one.
When I woke up this morning, I grabbed my phone, and checked my email (I was expecting a message from my dad). Instead, I found a snotty email from Daughter's Girl Scout troop leader. I don't want to re-hash the whole thing, but she is not really a friendly, warm person and she ALWAYS treats me like she thinks she's better. Everything she ever says to me is said with annoyance and an air of superiority. So that's how I started my day. I'm done with trying to be nice to her, so I replied in a very matter-of-fact kind of way. She and I emailed back and forth throughout the day and she just kept on being the same way. The problem is over and done with now, but GEEZ. What an aggravation, and what a crappy way to start my day! I hadn't even gotten out of bed yet! Gah.
Then the rest of the day was just frustrating. Nothing majorly bad happened...just lots of little bumps throughout the day. I have been SURROUNDED by forbidden foods at work lately...yesterday in the Break Room, there was tortilla chips, jellybeans, and pecan pie. That is my FAVORITE. It's so hard being around so much food at work...especially today! First, we had breakfast pizza at breakfast...then lasagna and garlic bread for lunch...then soft pretzels with honey mustard for snack (there was other stuff, too, but those were the naughty things I wanted to eat! Especially being in a bad mood, I reeeeeally wanted them. But didn't have a bite of anything).
When I'm finally headed home, I remembered a very important piece of mail that I was supposed to run by the Post Office. Of course I remember this when I'm nearly home. I go to pull the envelope out of my purse, and it's not there. BECAUSE I LEFT IT IN MY DANG CLASSROOM! I took it out of my purse to get my keys and never put it back. So I had to drive all the way back to school, get it, then drive through town to the Post Office. Then I'm sitting at the drive-up mailbox...just sitting...waiting and waiting...the people in front of me just sitting in their car...not moving...not putting mail in...REALLY?! I gave a little honk of the horn. They popped their mail in the box and drove on. GEEZ AGAIN! (It was this kind of day. No catastrophes, but an "I hit every single red light," pain in the ass, kind of day).
I finally made it home. Ordinarily, I'd stop at the grocery store and get a bottle of wine after a day like this. I'd pour a big glass of wine, sit in front of the TV, and cook some kind of "comfort food" for dinner: pizza, a pasta dish, nachos, maybe some take-out, etc. Something fast, easy, and yummy...and forbidden. I'd drink half a bottle of wine, eat a bunch of junk, and sit on my butt all evening. Gosh, that sounds lovely, doesn't it?!
Today however, I came home, whined, got a hug from everyone, popped dinner in the oven (a healthy dinner) and while dinner was cooking, I soaked in a lavender bubble bath and read my new Reader's Digest. At one point, I realized it was taking more energy to read the articles than I was willing to give. I put my magazine down and just closed my eyes. I took some long, deep breaths, and tried my best to relax. I kept thinking about that damn Girl Scout leader, and what a butthead she can be to me. Then I started thinking about how she just treats me like I'm some moron. That made me think about how, yes, I have been very scatterbrained and forgetful for quite a while. I had an incredibly hard year last year, and I'm only just now beginning to recover from it. It just goes to show that sometimes you never know what a person is going through, or what they've been through, so it's a good idea to not make snap judgements about them. Then I started thinking about Gramma, and how much I miss her. Of course, after this day, thinking about that nasty woman, and then thinking about how much I miss Gramma, I just started to cry. I cried for a couple minutes, and then felt better. I guess sometimes you just need to let it out a little bit. I washed my hair, face, body, and poured lots of warm water over the back of my head and down my back with a big cup. I used to do this when Daughter was a baby, and she found it very soothing. I found it very soothing as well. About this time, Husband knocked on the door to tell me dinner was ready, so I towelled off, put on my jammies, and came out feeling a little bit better.
I just reheated the rotisserie chicken from yesterday, and popped some SteamFresh green beans in the microwave. We sat at the table and enjoyed each other's company. It was a nice evening. Daughter made some pudding for herself and her dad. I hogged the last of the chocolate pudding this evening. I claimed it the second I walked in the house: "THAT CHOCOLATE PUDDING IS MINE." We enjoyed our desserts, cleaned up the kitchen together, and then Husband and I decided to watch some TV in our bedroom. He's been extra busy at work this week and is exhausted.
We got in bed and I started thinking about bills. Husband tried to tell me not to think about bills after the day I've had, but I really wanted to get my plan in place so that I could just relax. Husband and I have put ourselves on a brand-new budget. With my paycheck, I'm going to pay all our debts, except for the house. Husband is going to pay everything else (all the utilities, the mortgage, food and gas, and incidentals). This way, we can focus on getting our debts completely paid off, and it's less confusing this way, as we each have our own account to pay "our" bills with. We are excited to get this plan started, but paying bills is always frustrating. Part of a bad 2013 involved financial difficulty, which we are still paying for. Literally. We've started our new plan, but it's not been going on very long. I'm glad we are off to a good start, and I am looking forward to being able to "see" how it begins to work for us. I paid BIG money tonight on debts...and I'm thrilled. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my chest.
Briefly texted with SIL this morning. She skipped her WW meeting this week...and also gained a little bit. She will lose and gain, lose and gain. She doesn't always have a lot of self control, and she tends to make excuses, and minimize what she's doing. I'm trying to be nice when I think about it, that she's doing the best she can... I guess what I'm frustrated about is that she's struggled a long time (a lot longer than me) and I just keep seeing her doing the same thing and making the same mistakes over and over. I hate that for her. I hope I can encourage her to make some changes, and that I can do it in a right and loving way.
So, here's today's run-down:
SBD -- Phase 1.5, Day 31
Breakfast: Mean Green Juice (kale, lemon, ginger, cuke, celery, two green apples).
Lunch: leftover zucchini noodles with chicken, onions, and mushrooms, and creamy avocado sauce, small side salad with ranch dressing, 100 calorie pack of almonds & walnuts mixture, skim milk.
Dinner: leftover rotisserie chicken thigh and leg, green beans with slivered almonds, I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Spray:
Dessert: sugar-free chocolate pudding with sugar-free Cool Whip.
Snacks, string cheese, turkey and cheese rollups, one tiny bite of crunchy peanut butter, orange slice.
Activity: None, rest day.
Lying in my big, soft bed with my blankets, pillows, laptop, Husband, and a good TV show is a nice way to spend an evening after a sucky day. My family and furkids are happy and healthy, Husband and I both have jobs we enjoy, my dad will be visiting this weekend, and the bills are (somewhat) paid. I am grateful for each of these things.