Tuesday, April 22, 2014
With my back being injured, there is no way that I could safely clean up the yard for the summer. And boy did it need it: I did nothing in the line of fall cleanup, what with all the health crises going on. So we got a lawn service in to do a thorough cleanup, trimming, and general un-disastering of the yard, front, back, and side. It looks better than it has in a couple years.
And my first reaction to it all was to be really sad.
Poor hubby was distressed. "I don't know how to help you be happy!" he said. I didn't know, either. It made no sense, because I'd gotten what I wanted, and what I didn't have the physical capability of accomplishing myself.
But I realized that the process of cleaning up, as much as I thought I disliked it, had meaning for me. And not being able to do it, even when I can objectively see that I would not have done nearly as thorough a job, left me feeling a little hollow.
Fortunately, they did leave me one section of work that needs to be done: the ivy along the driveway and the narrow bed in which I plant my herbs that runs along the driveway as well. It's not a very big job, but since I can only work at it for half an hour a day, it will take me plenty of time.
And it will get me outside. I love my house, but after this winter it feels a little like I'm stuck inside a Coleman cooler. We have small windows and not much natural light--it's good for the heating bills, but psychologically wearing. I really need that sunshine. I've been outside walking at least an hour a day.
What I really need is a place to sit outside. We used to have a swing in the backyard, but it's gone now. We have no porch and no deck. And hubby isn't much for the outdoors, so just setting up a couple lawn chairs in the hopes that he will sit with me is pretty futile. He makes the valid point that he's either too hot or too cold, and at either extreme there are bugs; the chairs are less comfortable than the ones in the house and what exactly are we doing this for? But I dream of a summer kitchen kind of space. Oh well, maybe when I win the lottery!