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My plateau feels like a stall and stirs up emotions-scary

Monday, April 21, 2014

So I seem to be in a stall. I've been in this plateau state for about a month now. I work with all the logical things about this - reminding myself that the scale is not the true measure. Noting that my measurements have gone down. Seeing that I'm buying smaller clothes. Acknowledging that perhaps my body is in an adjustment phase after losing 33 pounds...but I still have a lot of emotion swirling around and it's scary.

I am surprised to see just how much that descending scale number meant to me. Some part of me feels adrift without seeing the number go down. That part is not satisfied with the other 'size' data. Some part of me has totally bought into the big lie about the number of what you weigh.

I am also, for the first time since I started program last June, feeling resistance. When I first plateaued, I added a 2nd work-out to my day, thinking that would get me off the plateau. I liked it and got into it. But I noticed last week, that I've been missing that 2nd workout. I also was looking at my meals and decided I need to eat more veggies and less nuts for snacks.

This morning when the scale not only didn't move, but went up 1 pound again [I've been staying the same and the being up or down 1 pound], I suddenly felt that old negating pattern, resistance. Resistance to my 2nd work out, resistance to more veggies. Suddenly my program is feeling tight and limited to me, where it had not before when I was 'progressing.'

Sometimes when I'm eating out, I'll eat a little fresh-baked roll. The other day I ate more than I usually do and noticed that I 'indulged'. Later it was evident that really ate too much because my stomach felt bloated. Looking back from it today, I saw that moment where I didn't stop. Now that moment of indulgence feels a little too much like sabotage.

I guess it's time to read more about the inner processes that lead us to sabotage but for now, I'm sharing these feelings right here and hope that keeping my attention on what I'm doing, will support me in staying aligned within myself.

I always gained back weight by going 'unconscious' when I reached goal, as I said in another post, holding that 'magical thinking' that once I lost weight I could return to not thinking about what and how I eat and stay thin. Perhaps it IS being near goal that is triggering all this, but in any event, I am NOT going to follow that path. It's not a fork in the road, it is just the wrong choice entirely.


Member Comments About This Blog Post:
KELTIK_HEART 4/23/2014 2:15PM

    This is a TERRIFIC blog topic, and one I've been dealing with for the past 2 weeks. I've not plateaued yet, but I can feel the "fatigue" of being on a strict eating program for 9 months and I've been nibbling more and feeling a bit hungrier too. My exercise this past month has declined a bit because I'm using the excuse "I'm SO tired from work tonight...."

I'm only about 12 lbs from my initial goal (may possibly adjust it down after a period of maintaining), and I feel like I'm cutting myself off from the pass - know what I mean? In fact, I have stolen your Stop Self Sabotage image to use myself!

SO, we just need to stay STRONG until we reach the end of the road (and live there comfortably for the rest of our lives).

emoticon emoticon

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WATERONE 4/22/2014 9:55AM

    Being self-aware is so important, Glad you are keeping focused on what is important to you.

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NANCYPAT1 4/22/2014 12:37AM

    Plateaus can be scary and they sometimes FEEL like we have been D I E T I N G rather than making LIFESTYLE changes.

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WOUBBIE 4/21/2014 10:20PM

    Carb creep is insidious. The first 5g or so might not make a difference and neither does the next 5g, but then suddenly you're going from 50g or less a day to 50g a meal. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, start back over again!

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SUE5007 4/21/2014 6:08PM

    I'm in the same boat as you. Four weeks about I went up 1-2 pound and I've held my weight there for the last month. I've had a good attitude about my very slow monthly losses so far this year but when you don't see any progress towards a goal for a month it's hard to not get discouraged. I've also been really hungry the last 2 weeks, perhaps because I've been burning about 400 more calories a week trying to break the plateau? This week I'm focusing on getting enough sleep. Hopefully that will help.

I also tried on a pair of pants from a store Saturday and it was nice to see that they fit. (This was me trying to distract myself from numbers and see the progress I've made) Maybe that will help you too? Something about seeing clothes that aren't mine on my smaller body helped me see/appreciate the progress I've made.

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