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    SUNSHINE65   87,455
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A few laffs

Sunday, April 20, 2014

A man was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, “You are beautiful.” Then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that, so she stayed by his side. A few minutes later, his eyes fluttered open and he said, “You are cute!” The wife was disappointed because instead of “beautiful,” it was now “cute.” She said, “What happened to ‘beautiful’?”
Her husband replied, “The drugs are wearing off!”

The lawyer was cross-examining a witness.
“Isn’t it true, “he bellowed, “that you were I given $500.00 to throw this case?”
The witness did not answer. Instead, he just stared out the window as though he hadn’t
heard the question. The attorney repeated himself, again getting the same reaction - no response.
Finally, the judge spoke to the witness, “Please answer the question.”
“Oh,” said the startled witness, “I thought he was talking to you.”

During training exercises, the Lieutenant driving down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud with a red-faced colonel at the wheel.
"Your jeep stuck, sir?" asked the Lieutenant as he pulled alongside.
"Nope," replied the Colonel, coming over and handing him the keys, "Yours is."

A sweet little boy surprised his grandmother one morning and brought her a cup of coffee. He made it himself and was so proud. He anxiously waited to hear the verdict on the quality of the coffee. The grandmother had never in her life had such a bad cup of coffee, and as she forced down the last sip she noticed three of those little green army guys in the bottom of the cup.
She asked, "Honey, why would three little green army guys be in the bottom of my cup?"
Her grandson replied, "You know grandma, it's like on TV, 'The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup.'"


Member Comments About This Blog Post:
IMUSTLOSEIT1 4/21/2014 10:58AM

    emoticon you always make me smile.

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PDSLIM 4/21/2014 10:55AM


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MYAKAYAH 4/21/2014 2:21AM

    All of those funnies were wonderful tonight~

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LACEYKYLE 4/21/2014 12:26AM


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DALID414 4/20/2014 9:52PM

    emoticon emoticon

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SANDRALEET 4/20/2014 9:45PM

    emoticon emoticon

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DOVESEYES 4/20/2014 9:19PM


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MJ7DM33 4/20/2014 9:18PM


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LINOVER 4/20/2014 8:55PM

    Great! Thanks for giving me a good laugh today! Happy Easter!

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JOMAMART66 4/20/2014 8:21PM

    I liked the last one best...

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NANCYPAT1 4/20/2014 8:13PM

    They were cute - I guess MY drugs are wearing off too - beautiful just wasn't my word today.

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HAWKTHREE 4/20/2014 8:10PM

    I was in the Navy and a lowly Ensign. A Captain took my vehicle once because his was covered in snow. I had just shoveled mine clean.

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KACEYSW 4/20/2014 7:58PM


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WDIPIM 4/20/2014 7:58PM

  God Bless

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HELEN_BR 4/20/2014 7:55PM

    Very funny! Hope you had a nice Easter.

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DMEYER4 4/20/2014 7:51PM

  love it thanks for the laughs

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