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    APONI_KB   21,012
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oh boy some things you just have to learn yourself

Friday, April 18, 2014

I have a good friend who once upon a time lost a lot of weight. I didn't know her then but she showed me some pictures and it was shocking. She's one of those people who grew up a chubby kid and then lost weight in her 20's.

Fast forward 10 years. She had a baby, put on a few pounds, ignored it for a while, then one day said "that's it I'm going to lose the weight again."

She started exercising and joined weight watchers. I did WW some time ago and it worked and I hit my goal weight but the whole staying within 2 pounds or having to pay drove me off. Well that and the whole sanctimoniousness of the group.

Then I got sloppy about measuring my portions and a few other factors and put all the weight back on.

Another friend of mine lost weight with adkins, gained it all back, lost it again with WW, gained it all back, and is now at her target weight through Spark and determined to not repeat the past.

Ok so back to the friend who just joined WW. She's been at it for a few weeks now. She's lost almost 10 pounds. This week she gained 0.2 pounds and it has really knocked her for a loop. I've tried all the consoling, pep talking, don't beat yourself up, get back on the horse

pick yourself up
dust yourself off
and start all over again

Apologies for the ear worm.

emoticon

She responded in less than a positive way. She went on a rant about how she's been measuring her food, logging every bite, forgoing things she' rather eat, working out when she didn't want to, and she's been hungry and to go through all that and gain weight is just ruthlessly unfair.

I think its more than just the 0.2 pounds. It's also that she was going out to lunch with some former coworkers and there were nothing on the menu at the restaurant where they were going that was on plan. Then its Easter so she's going to a pick pickin' Saturday and then to a cookout at her in-laws on Sunday. There is going to be ham and potatoes and candy everywhere. She's also already mad at her in-laws for what she knows is going to be pressure to eat things she doesn't want to eat.

I know this so I'm ok with her lashing out at me. Better me than her MIL.

Also if you need to know what a pick pickin' is let me know.

Then she lashes out at our other friend who lost all the weight. She tried to commiserate about the weekend and told her that she has a sunrise service, then a breakfast at her church, followed by more church, and then a pot luck thing.

side note: I'm not a church going person so the traditions surrounding Easter escape me, but I get the gist.

This lashing out took the form of your are at your goal weight, if I were at my goal weight I'd be fine with the weekend.

We've ferreted out that she is still seeing this as a diet and once she hits her goal she wants to stop logging and measuring and working out when she doesn't want to.

Oh dear

I see where this is going.

I see healthy living sort of like swimming upstream. You struggle and struggle, sometimes you make progress and sometimes you just stay in place. Heck sometimes you go backwards but if you stop struggling you get washed downstream and over the water fall.

graphic perhaps but there it is

What do you do though. If she isn't ready she isn't ready and some things people have to figure out on their own.

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MUFFIY831 4/21/2014 9:26AM

    I have a friend similar to yours, I think. She is either "being good" and losing weight and, in her case at least, a total nightmare to be around, or she throws in the towel and eats whatever she wants. She doesn't see moderation and lifelong sustainable effort, she sees Diet Mode and Done Mode. Not how life works!

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APONI_KB 4/20/2014 8:04AM

    Oh I agree, she was not in her happy place. I think she was just feeling discouraged and I get that. There are times when you are doing everything right and yet it doesn't show up on the scale. Her WW meeting is first thing in the morning too so talk about setting the tone for the day.

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GOLFGMA 4/19/2014 10:07AM

    Maybe she was just having a stressful day and just needed a sounding board. I am reminded me of something I read yesterday that a true friend should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger. I am constantly reminded of this, not always before I needed the reminder. Your friend will be fine on a less stressful weekend I'm sure. emoticon

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MARGARITTM 4/18/2014 2:40PM

    I know what you mean - gotta figure it out sometimes for yourself. but seriously .2 lb..... that is just the extra sodium in the restaurant food. ....Lighten up! If it turns into a trend ok then - re-evaluate.



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LOVELESMILLS 4/18/2014 8:46AM

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