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Friday, April 11, 2014

Tomorrow I am starting fresh. So, I probably didn't pick the best day to do so considering; I have to fast, and skip breakfast for blood-work in the morning; I am staying up all night so that I will make it to said appointment in the morning (hence the extra time I have to update my Spark Page and write this blog.) I am over-educating myself with SP related data, and making a grocery list with suggestions from fellow sparkers, and probably then over-educating myself some more, before getting my daughter and father up and taken care of, watching them eat breakfast while I starve, taking daughter to sitters, and then getting blood drawn. I am already thinking up excuses to go to McDonald's after my appointment. So, I am trying to thwart my pre-self-sabotage with a healthy trip to the grocery store instead. My daughter will be upset because there will no longer be any chicken nuggets, pizza, ice-cream, and candy in the house. But, she will have to get over it, I am NOT letting her have to go through this battle in 10+ years. My dad is going to give me a huge guilt trip about not getting to eat what he loves (biscuits and gravy, chicken and dumplings, all the greasy fried southern sh*t you can think of) in his final days/years. Okay, I do get it, he doesn't have much longer, he should get to enjoy his food. But I have gained another 20lbs in the past 6mos because I am enjoying it right along with him. I have no self control. If it is there, I will eat it. And, if I don't want to end up like him, having a triple heart bypass at the age of 33 and then a failing heart altogether at the age of 59, I've got to start fixing things NOW. There is no hope left for dear PawPaw to fix things, but there is for me, I hope he can understand that. I cannot wait around any longer, because after one excuse is over, I will just come up with another, and then another, and then another. NO MORE EXCUSES! It's go time!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    1439 days ago
    you sound well prepared
    1439 days ago
    My dad died at the age of 55 (heart attack) after having had 2 heart bypass surgeries in the course of his life, so I can SO relate. I am in the same place where I don't want to repeat the health mistakes of my parents. We can turn it all around with hard work though! Good luck on your blood tests, and keep up the positive thoughts!
    1439 days ago
  • JACKIE542
    Good plan and great reasons to get going on the spark plan. Get yourself into healthy eating and such a great example for your daughter. Wish my mother had done this for me. emoticon
    1439 days ago
    emoticon You need to put yourself first. If you don't, you'll wind up wishing you had. Your plan is a good one, and your daughter will benefit from it, much as she may grumble now. :)
    1439 days ago
  • JSPIN74
    emoticon state it, plan it, work for it...all with good reasons/'re on your way! & saying it out loud again & again is good...we all fall off, but as RHOOK20047 said "Never give up"! emoticon emoticon
    1439 days ago
  • RHOOK20047
    emoticon Sounds like you have a plan in place to see success. Just stick with it even when it doesn't look like it is working. Never give up. I am the king of excuses, but since I tossed the excuses out of the door, I feel great and wonder why I let myself sabatouge myself for so long!
    1440 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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