Tuesday, April 08, 2014
This past week I have been struggling with motivation and keeping my focus. After looking at some things, I am blaming - are you ready? My success.
I have just reached the goal of losing 10% of my bodyweight. I have lost a little over 20 lbs. I feel good. I look better. So those gremlins that occupy my head are telling me to just stop here. Silly me was listening - for a bit. Then I gave it more thought and realised if I stop, I will go back to where I came from.
Where I came from was not a good place. I was not happy. I was not as healthy. Every piece of clothing I owned was tight or too small. I was out of breath going up the stairs. I didn't want to do things with people. I hid from cameras. I made excuses. I belittled myself. I felt lazy. I had no ambition. I rarely ate a vegetable or piece of fruit.
I don't want to go back there. So, when those gremlins tell me it is ok to eat a bunch of cookies, or pizza, or to have another soda - or to blow off going to the Y or getting on the treadmill - I try to remember that girl and those feelings.
This is one of those points where I would normally throw in the towel. Where I would say - yep I look good enough for summer, I am back in "normal" sizes, this is ok.
Guess what? This is NOT ok! This is ok for now, but I have other places to go on this path. I want to see what is up ahead and the only way I can do that is to keep putting one foot in front of the other and making the best choices I can each day.
Barb, it is NOT ok to quit. Have a glass of water......go for a walk during lunch hour......move on!