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Journey To The Root Of The Problem...


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Wednesday, April 02, 2014


This journey is far more than simply losing some unwanted pounds. I was emotionally battered and I didnít even realize it, since I had developed so many unhealthy coping mechanisms. I would eat to suppress and then simply laugh it off. My usual reaction after walking away from the buffet with yet another heaping plate was to shrug it off and, with a laugh, say, "Oh well, diet starts tomorrow!" or " I'm defeating anorexia one egg roll at a time". Behind the smile and jovial sense of humor was someone who has lost touch with himself in a really big way.

So many times when I was working out, I would have emotions that would erupt from out of nowhere. I would feel like I was on the verge of tears, some repressed emotion from some past hurt was surfacing. I found myself taking laps in anger and it boiled over to where I would be acting out a confrontation with someone while walking, angrily grumbling to myself. That was a form of hostility and hidden resentment that was trying to get out. I had to give my heart what it was looking for - some much needed release and resolution. I needed to recognize what was happening and submit to the process.

It took a long time, but I am convinced that self-introspection and dealing with the issues is one reason I lasted as long as I did. You may put out the flame, but if the coals are still burning, the fire will re-ignite when the right fuel is applied. What I thought was going to be yet another attempt to lose weight became a transforming, inward journey. This, I believe, is where so many fast track ways to weight loss totally fail. This is strictly my opinion but it seems that people that strip off weight fast rarely get to the root of the cause. It takes time to work through the issues. For me, the weight was an outward sign of an inward problem.

Sometimes it hurts and, when food has been used to soothe inner pain, the process can be threatening. After living a life of avoidance, it was difficult for me to face issues. Like a boil, it would come to the surface until, one day, it was lanced by confrontation. The resulting tears were cleansing to the soul.

I have found that when the feelings come, let them come with all that they bring with them. Releasing myself emotionally has been a big part of putting out the fire that has been driving my binges. Unresolved anger, and anxiety can take on many forms and their origins are deceiving. I had to go through the uncomfortable process of confronting past hurts but it promoted the healing necessary to bring about a sense of resolution and stability.

I am convinced that attempts at losing weight when emotional eating issues are at work will be doomed to failure if this is not part of the process.


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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
THE_RED_BIRD 4/3/2014 3:02PM

    Thank you for being so open and sharing such important insight!

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SUSIEMT 4/3/2014 2:36PM

    Robert, for me that has been a major part of my journey! Some may never care to admit that but hopefully If they need it they will get the help they need!

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GINA180847 4/3/2014 2:11PM

    It is all so true, one has to allow the vulnerability to surface and be felt. That is not easy but it is slowly being done and in many ways. I just wish I had tacked all this much younger. Love you to bits Robert for always pointing the way.

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TRUCKER72 4/3/2014 2:07PM

    I have loads of time to think to myself when I am swimming laps and sometimes I find myself mumbling too - underwater ! emoticon

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WHYTEBROWN 4/3/2014 1:19PM

    emoticon

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MARYELA 4/3/2014 1:19PM

    emoticon

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MIMIDOT 4/3/2014 12:46PM

    Great blog! Thanks for sharing.

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STARRD616 4/3/2014 12:43PM

    Thanks for sharing your insight regarding this struggle we face.

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JUSGETTENBY42 4/3/2014 11:59AM

    emoticon

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DSHONEYC 4/3/2014 11:56AM

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REMCMFA 4/3/2014 11:53AM

   




Comment edited on: 4/3/2014 11:54:37 AM

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REMCMFA 4/3/2014 11:51AM

    Nice blog!


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DIAMOND102 4/3/2014 11:44AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PYNETREE 4/3/2014 11:41AM

    Whoa .. did I write this?!? Or are you reading my mind?
Maybe now that I've accepted the pain and shame, that I can use that to fuel myself to move more, exercise for real. Thanks!.

emoticon And emoticon

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C8TSON 4/3/2014 11:33AM

    Wonderful blog! Thank you so much for sharing your struggles. It is helpful to know when we are not alone in some of these battles. emoticon

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NEPTUNE1939 4/3/2014 11:28AM

    emoticon

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KARYNLYNN17 4/3/2014 11:26AM

    I have never even wonder if I was an emotional eater - my family are just eaters. We get together for sad events - we eat. We get together for happy events - we eat. A few years ago my husband and I changed our eating habits - to healthier eating, but when everyone got together - we ate. My husband would plan on it, but I did not plan so would end up having a little bit of everything. I need to find new ways to celebrate. This blog provided great insight to how I may have been masking how I felt - I didn't ever want to call what our healthy eating was - dieting because we were overweight and unhealthy. Thank you for sharing

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NMNANCY 4/3/2014 11:26AM

  Great insight! emoticon

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SPARKBJOK 4/3/2014 11:23AM

    Well done!

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UNSWEETMAMA 4/3/2014 11:09AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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STEVIEBEE569 4/3/2014 11:00AM

    emoticon emoticon

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ONTHEPATH2 4/3/2014 10:49AM

    Wow! I can relate. It really isn't always about the food - but the holes in our souls underneath it that the food never fills - but we keep trying! Glad you are finding ways to cope with your feelings. The good thing about them is that they constantly change! Way to go!!! emoticon

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SHERYLP461 4/3/2014 10:31AM

    Excellent blog. Anger was the emotion that let me to over eat. I actually heard when someone said to allow another to make you angry is to give away your power...since that moment, I have focused on never allowing this to happen, of course sometimes it does, but then I focus on why I have allowed it and who caused it, often finding that this person was not someone that was important in my life. Then I was able to let it go. Your situation of course, was something entirely different, but perhaps someone else can use this thought.

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FITWITHIN 4/3/2014 10:25AM

    emoticon I'm at this crossroad with this issue at this time, and I know it's the reason why I keep losing and regaining the same pounds. Thanks again for another eye opener blog that I can relate to once again. Keep up the excellent work on amazing journey. emoticon

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CAROLCRC 4/3/2014 10:24AM

    My first couple years of running I found old confrontations constantly coming to mind and re-playing themselves in my head. After the run I often felt purged of the anger and the same confrontations rarely resurfaced. Definitely therapeutic.

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SHOAPIE 4/3/2014 10:15AM

    emoticon

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COPLEN 4/3/2014 10:13AM

  I really related to your blog. Particularly the anger. I have never gone through the process of losing my father, mother and particularly my sister. Anger and low grade depression is just below the surface. I was looking at my dog this morning, thinking, how much fun am I. Your article is very uplifting and insightful. In fact, I think I will have to change my mood from a 5 to a 6. Have a wonderful day.

Comment edited on: 4/3/2014 10:15:11 AM

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SHARONCAPPS 4/3/2014 10:10AM

  Thak you. What a great share. Good Job!

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DAUNTLESSDONNA 4/3/2014 10:01AM

    Way to share. emoticon

We're digging deep and in it for the long haul. emoticon

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GIRLINMOTION 4/3/2014 9:55AM

    You are so right about getting to the issue regarding emotional eating to be successful.

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LSPIZZA 4/3/2014 9:55AM

    Great blog. I used to run and cry instead of comfort eat when I was first dealing with Pete's death. I don't tend to cry when I work out anymore but I sure use it in pkace of comfort eating as i am still - many years later dealing with Pete's death.

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JIBBIE49 4/3/2014 9:47AM

    Great to see your blog featured in the Spark Mail.

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TRUECOLORS 4/3/2014 9:43AM

    Thank you for sharing. I am an emotional eater and have been struggling for the past few years- even more so than normal. I haven't put my finger on what I am holding in but I keep working at it.
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FRABBIT 4/3/2014 9:35AM

  Very well written. Thanks for sharing!

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AURIANNE67 4/3/2014 9:35AM

    So very articulately put, I agree with you that the real journey is to discovering who you are and what you're really looking for. What you're looking for when you eat food that makes you physically and emotionally numb and what you're looking for when you want to lose weight.

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WORKNPROGRESS49 4/3/2014 9:33AM

    emoticon emoticon

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GORDON66 4/3/2014 9:24AM

  First of all, cute kitty!!!!!!!!

I've alway felt the dieting and losing weight are only a patch covering up the underlying problem. I applaud you for making those discoveries. You're an awesome dude and thank you for sharing.

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MSLZZY 4/3/2014 9:19AM

    emoticon emoticon Get to the root of the problem and let the healing begin.

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BUFFALO63 4/3/2014 9:16AM

    Great insight!

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IDICEM 4/3/2014 9:14AM

  emoticon

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KOMTRIA 4/3/2014 9:04AM

  Well said. This is probably the hardest part of the journey.

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DJSHIP46 4/3/2014 9:01AM

    Thanks for sharing.

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FANCYFREE15 4/3/2014 8:56AM

    You are such a brave man. What you're saying is so true! And it takes a tremendous amount of courage to acknowledge it, face, it, work through it, and share the journey as you have done and are doing. emoticon

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RADIOACTIVEGN 4/3/2014 8:50AM

  I can't tell you how many times I've realized I was mumbling to myself while walking down the street because of the confused look of a stranger going the opposite way. But you're right - it has to come out sometime!

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NIKKIJ55 4/3/2014 8:43AM

    Great blog! Thank you

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INGMARIE 4/3/2014 8:43AM

    emoticon Thank you for sharing.
well said emoticon

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CARLAWILLDOIT 4/3/2014 8:39AM

  The great thing about our journeys is that they are OURS. Your words are so powerful and inspiring for taking the reigns to find your inner peace. Thank you!

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Comment edited on: 4/3/2014 8:40:42 AM

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GWINNER1 4/3/2014 8:23AM

    Awesome blog....very well said!

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AJB121299 4/3/2014 8:23AM

    nice

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JUDYERAE 4/3/2014 8:22AM

    emoticon

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