I understand my passive-aggressive inspired binge
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Yesterday I had a brush with a passive-aggressive person. The scenario is that I say something about the world in general and what puzzles me or what I think. And the person responds, more or less, with "You don't like me". Or "You make me feel like quitting." I am flabbergasted. Let's say I'm talking about the excellent schools in Finland and this person responds that (because she went to school in Japan or France, say, for example): "Oh, you want me to give up!"
I'm taken aback. That's not what I meant. Instead of saying "Why do you think this is about you?" or "Why are you trying to goad me into defending myself about something that has no relevance to you", I end up feeling scared and bad.
Instead of going into all the reasons I felt that way, I also felt that I needed a heavy dose of white carbs to soothe myself. This is the kind of scenario in which people fall off the wagon. It's the kind of scenario in which addicts turn back to their addiction.
I've learned something big, however----I can avoid talking to the kind of person who has littered the field of ordinary conversation with personal land mines. It's on me to avoid this kind of person until my ego is stronger.
I binged and I hope I have learned: if others still have the power to make me feel so wretched that I turn to my drug of choice, white carbs, I must work harder on myself.