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    SUNSHINE65   56,266
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A few late nite jokes

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Authorities in Wisconsin are searching for the owner of a kangaroo after it was caught walking around outside in the frigid weather. That's got to be frustrating for the kangaroo. Walking around in freezing weather, knowing you have a pocket, but your hands are too short to put them in it. --Jay Leno

Japanese Sumo wrestling officials may start allowing wrestlers now to wear pants. Ah, great, there goes the sex appeal. --Dave Letterman

Federal officials entered a Wisconsin classroom and seized several giant African land snails because they're considered a health hazard. Officials rounded up the snails after a two second chase. --Conan O'Brien

There's no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting. -David Letterman

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host. -David Letterman

There's only one requirement of any of us, and that is to be courageous. Because courage, as you might know, defines all other human behavior. And, I believe - because I've done a little of this myself - pretending to be courageous is just as good as the real thing. -David Letterman

Dick Cheney said he was running again. He said his health was fine, 'I've got a doctor with me 24 hours a day.' Yeah, that's always the sign of a man in good health, isn't it? -David Letterman
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

YMWONG22 3/26/2014 3:13AM

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LINOVER 3/24/2014 5:05PM

    Good ones! emoticon

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IMUSTLOSEIT1 3/24/2014 12:19PM

    HERE ONE FOR YOU;

I have a friend whose wife joked to him that, for her birthday, she'd like something parked in the driveway that went from zero to 500 in a few seconds. he was a joker, too - she woke to find their bathroom scale in the driveway.

Linda

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CATLADY52 3/24/2014 10:47AM

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PDSLIM 3/24/2014 10:34AM

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GODSCHILDAMYB 3/24/2014 8:37AM

    Good ones!!

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NYARAMULA 3/24/2014 6:31AM

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KS_PRINCESS115 3/24/2014 2:31AM

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IGNITEME101 3/24/2014 1:56AM

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WORKOUTWITHPAM 3/24/2014 12:17AM

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CTUPTON 3/23/2014 11:32PM

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GENRE009 3/23/2014 11:19PM

    either you are David Letterman's writer, or you thought these were really funny when you watched the show, and they are!

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MYAKAYAH 3/23/2014 11:04PM

    Very fun and interesting~

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WITCHYALISHA 3/23/2014 10:54PM

    Giggle

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DALID414 3/23/2014 10:47PM

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DOVESEYES 3/23/2014 10:32PM

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ELSCO55 3/23/2014 10:22PM

    LOL

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PAMNANGEL 3/23/2014 10:16PM

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