Sunday, March 16, 2014
I was going to call this blog Belated February Assessment, March Update and Goals. Because that's what I was going to do. But I changed my mind. Given the stresses of the past weeks and in keeping with the reminder that life is truly and really quite short, I decided to go big! In the end, what do we really have? I am working on keeping things in perspective.
My younger son came home from a visit with his father a couple weeks and told me that his dad was pretty sick, and over the next couple weeks, the news just got worse and worse. It turns out he needs triple bypass heart surgery, an aortic aneurysm repaired and a lot of arterial blockage in his legs bypassed. We are all struggling with this. I feel so sad for him and for my two grown sons, who are scared they are going to lose their father. Iím trying to help as much as I can and be there for my sons. Itís not really a surprise, since he is such a heavy smoker, but just so sad that itís come to this. Hopefully he will make it through the surgeries and go on to live a healthier life. Both of our sons have been there for their dad and the younger one who lives with me has been amazing, going to doctorís appointments with him, asking the questions that need to be asked, scheduling appointments and the surgery and just being with him. His surgery is scheduled for Friday and weíll find out tomorrow what the recovery is.
Most important to me is to be there for my sons, give them the support and the love they need to make it through this as best they can, whatever happens. I also want to support their dad. Even though we haven't been married for a long time, I still care about him and hate that this is happening to him. However much it is self-inflicted.
While Iím trying to keep up with everything, I have not been as disciplined as I might have been otherwise. My girlfriends and I bagged our half marathon, partly because one of them got a concussion and couldnít run, partly because of everything going on here Ė I wasnít sure of the timing of everything and didnít want to be out of town for two days. So instead if the race, my girlfriends and I had a spa day yesterday (massages and dinner) and that was good. I am so blessed to have such good friends. Just so lucky.
And while I had been fairly good about staying with the program up until he week before last, this completely threw me. Iím ready to recommit now, though. Iím not going to do a blow by blow assessment of the past 6 weeks, but I will get back to that next month. For now, Iím going to work on the goals I laid out for February, working out, eating well. I want to be the strongest person I can be, so I can do the things I need to do. And always remember to be in the moment and take all the joy I can from this life Iíve been given.