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    HEALTHYNCGAL   9,957
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I'm back...and I'm READY.

Sunday, March 09, 2014

My life has been one extreme or the other lately. Things are either wonderful, or awful. This has really been an exhausting experience, and I needed to take a step back as I was feeling incredibly overwhelmed from all the stress.

I will keep this short. I FINALLY went to the grocery store and bought $200 worth of HEALTHY food so I can start Phase One of South Beach Diet. Husband is going on Phase One as well. I'm going to start taking better care of myself, and not just physically. I really, really, really neglect myself, kind of in every way possible. I've decided to really love myself, and give myself the kind of care I give to everyone else in my life. I'm tired of putting myself last...it's not exactly working out for me!

I just took a long, leisurely bath and shaved my legs. I truly cannot remember the last time I shaved my legs; it's been that long. I gave myself a mini-pedicure and mini-facial. I washed and deep conditioned my hair. I'm going to straighten up my room a bit and settle in for a night of relaxation: family time, a little Pinterest and online "window shopping." I want to start looking at clothes and shoes and jewelry. I used to be so stylish and put together, and it's been so long that I don't even really know what's "out there." As I lose this weight, I want to regain my sense of style.

I've also checked out several books from the library about grief. I've been having a very hard time coping with all the loss I've experienced the past couple of years. I've lost friends, family members died, pets have died or disappeared... I've also had a lot of family (in-law) stress for the past several months, and I need to start working on moving on (again) and remembering who I am, in spite of that stressful situation.

I plan to take better care of myself, physically. I want to make sure I do my hair and makeup every day... even if I don't feel like it. I want to make sure I look as nice as I possibly can, and not sloppy. I want to keep my eyebrows tweezed and my legs shaved. I want to exercise about 5 days per week. I can't keep putting this off. I have to stop thinking it's too late to do this. I'm not getting any younger or any thinner. Quite the opposite! I've got to get on the ball, and take very good care of myself.

For the first time in a very long time, I feel hopeful. I actually feel somewhat optimistic. I also feel bruised and battered and exhausted...but there is that tiny glimmer of possibility, and I haven't been able to say that in an incredibly long time.

With that, I'm going to go chop up some vegetables, so I will have healthy snacks this week.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHARON10002 3/10/2014 10:36PM

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Sounds like you have given this the thought it needs, and you have formulated a plan.

With DH doing SB too you should have good success, and it will be easier on you to only cook one meal.

Keep that glimmer of hope alive. Search for it though out the day, and that will bring it into your focus. Searching for new clothes and finding your sense of style again will help move this along faster.

If you've been reading my Loving yourself blogs, you know that when you feel good, you feel more confident, and that will help you with the rest of it. So I think the sense of style is most definitely a key component for you again. How about a new hairdo to go along with some new clothes and the new you? emoticon
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Comment edited on: 3/10/2014 10:36:59 PM

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NYARAMULA 3/10/2014 7:09AM

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NANFACEMIRE1 3/9/2014 8:35PM

    Sounds like you have a good plan and are "sticking" to it. You can do this and you will.

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HEALTHYNCGAL 3/9/2014 7:39PM

    As usual, I'm amazed, humbled, and enormously and eternally grateful for the support I receive on SparkPeople. You guys are the BEST.

I've read a couple of books by Robin McGraw (Dr. Phil's wife). I really like her, and her books. She helps you learn that you're not doing yourself OR YOUR LOVED ONES any favors by continually putting yourself last. I think I need to re-read her books. They are very inspiring, and just what I need to remind myself of.

I spent about an hour cutting up veggies, making tuna salad, chicken salad, wraps, portioned cottage cheese cups, etc, etc. The ONLY thing I've ever had real success with was South Beach Diet, but it's been nearly ten years since I did it. It only "stopped working" for me because I quit doing it. I can be such an idiot sometimes. Oh well. I have learned from my mistakes and I intend to stick with it this time.

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GINILEE4 3/9/2014 6:56PM

   
I am happy to see you here and making the changes you need to make for yourself. I would like to be ready to look after myself but am not at that point yet. I am going for a haircut though. Take your time and enjoy learning more about the things you like and what you want for yourself. emoticon


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CHERDOLL8 3/9/2014 6:13PM

    Glad you are back!
You can do it
You will do it

Remember the formula for success is
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If it is to be it is up to me

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KATHYJO56 3/9/2014 6:02PM

    You hit the nail on the head when you said you want to start looking your best everyday. It makes a huge difference! Always remember to take time for yourself and you will actually find that you have more time for those that you love. I look forward to seeing how you do on South Beach. I think that you will do it!

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