Saturday, March 08, 2014
2 Timothy 1:7
King James Version (KJV)
7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
My original reaction to the news of grandson Jakob's need for surgery on cartilage in his voice box was worse than fear. I found myself almost paralyzed, literally reliving - literally feeling all over again! - the terror of those first few weeks of his life. Coming home from a delightful shopping trip with my mother to have my Dad tell me that Jakob's arrival was imminent, at just 24 weeks and 3 days. Hanging up from Tobias's phone call referenced in my last blog still in tears. Taking a piece of printer paper and drawing a "baby" on it since he was only 11-1/4" long. Holding the paper and crying and crying and crying.....
But I have since been able to let go of that and get on with life. I wish I could say that it was just because of the strength of my faith, but I can't. It was definitely helped along by some good news on the medical front.
The doctor doing the surgery has postponed to the 20th. He is confident enough of not needing to do a trach that he will do it in what's called the short-stay area of the hospital. If he finds he needs to do the trach, he will not proceed but will wake Jakob up and then reschedule for another week out.
As an RN, I was never shy about questioning a doc. But only once did I ever refuse to carry out a medical order. My basic thinking is that I have the knowledge to know what questions to ask, and even to know when the answer just isn't right! And now that I know have seen the pictures from the MRI and know a lot more about the procedure, I'm confident about leaving the activity in this man's hands and the outcome to God.