Sunday, February 23, 2014
This weekend has kind of been a bipolar experience. My mother took my daughter from Friday night until this morning and so my husband I got a taste of what life was like without a kid for the first time in a long time. I can honestly say that I cannot remember the last time I was so genuinely happy. It makes me feel so guilty to say that but when you're stay-at-home mom and the kid is not home it really is like a vacation from work. And of course I began to miss my daughter so I'm not entirely a horrible mother.
However, with the lack of child my husband I went out to dinner, we went to a movie, and we generally ate junk food. So even though my muscles were aching from the fantastic work out on Thursday the scale certainly put me in my place this morning and I feel incredible ICK about what I consumed.
Not only do I feel bad about what I ate and that we went out I also feel bad that my stay at home mom duties were neglected. For example I had TWO perfectly good meals planned prepped and ready to go- all they need to do was be thrown in the oven!! and we still ignored them in favor for going out just because we didn't have my daughter. Ugh. My husband said he didn't want to eat one (his stomach hurt)....so I'm back to cooking stuff no one is eating then feeling bad about it. Feeling under appreciated. I need to re tackle my food plans. I've never hated food so much.
When one of the meals was finally put in the oven I took a nap and my husband and I forgot to set a timer and that meal was burnt to a crisp. This set off some paranoia about why the heck am I trying to coupon and save money on so much grocery shopping if we just going to throw perfectly good meals down the drain because of careless burning???? Sigh.
I guess I'm feeling I'm doing a couple things at once and neither one of them are being done very well ......so not a very good feeling for my self-esteem. The irony is the last thing I need is another vacation.