Thursday, February 20, 2014
OK – here I am, brushing off my wounded ego…
It has taken quite a while, but I am back – and this time, it feels a bit different. Everything has gotten back to square one – gained back the weight, stopped working out, injured body parts, using excuses, blah blah… So what has changed? I think I have. I am not ‘gung-ho’ this time…not filled with new excitement and new motivation. Not a whoo hoo, yipppeeee nor a hurray in me. Just a calm realization that today is going to be the best shape my health and body are ever going to be unless I make some changes and make them consistently and make them now.
I am not going to tell anyone I am on another eating program, health kick or exercise routine. (except my Spark family, of course). I am going to make teeennnnnnnny changes.
I ‘got’ that had I stayed with ‘it’, by now I would be energized, healthy and able to wear anything I want (including sleeveless!). So, no huge announcements, no impossible promises or zillions of items on a to-do list. No going crazy beating myself up every time I don’t do it perfectly. No due dates. None of that.
I am going to be gentle, take baby steps, do the best I can, watch what I eat without making drastic changes I can’t stick with. I will record the minor adjustments I make and how I feel. I will keep my improvements ‘close to the chest’, as it were. I will check my Spark information – but no specific schedule on which days I will do so. I will not do anything that will make me feel bad about not doing something...ya know?
So this time, there will be no marching bands, no fireworks, nothing ‘loud’ – no one will know about my getting healthy. This time I will let my body speak for itself, let the world see my results without me telling them about it. If someone tells me I look thinner, I will not go into a lecture on how I did it. I will just smile and say ‘thank you’. I will see this weight loss journey as something precious and will only share about it when I reach my goal – which will be the first time in years. Then, get ready – ‘cause the band will be amazing, the fireworks awe inspiring the Whoo Hoos and Yipppeeesss nice and loud.
But for now, I will take it slow and quietly take it one step at a time.