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    RESOLUTION2014   2,573
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Response to Pessimism

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Thursday, February 13, 2014

I shared my fitness goals with my best friend, and not surprisingly, she said:

"Don't be upset if you fail. It's hard to gain the flexibility and strength people have trained their whole lives for."

My friend is cautious, and can be negative as a result. This used to drive me crazy, but I realized she really cared about me. If she didn't, she wouldn't risk saying what she does.
I took a deep breath and thought "What if I never reach my goals?" and the answer came to me, so I said to her

"Even if I never reach my goals, I will be healthier for trying. I won't end up old and barely able to stand on my own. That's really the point, to have a good quality of life, so I chose fitness goals that would encourage me to work towards that."

She completely understood and supported that. And I know she'll be happy when I reach my goals, and will probably have some new cautionary advice to give me then.


Unrelated awesomeness: there is a couple that walks around our neighborhood everyday, even when the temperature is below zero. I think they're crazy and inspirational at the same time. I think they walk 4 miles now. That's dedication!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEATHER3477 2/23/2014 10:25PM

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NINAHAPPYHEART 2/20/2014 1:55AM

    You're a very sensitive and a faithful person that's what i see, it's lovely to have a big heart friend like you ,i have such friends,they are two actually but they're far away ,living in another countries and still they're very supportive from there, through the internet.
Good friends are gifts from God.

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MARYHENNIG 2/18/2014 7:12PM

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KWOOD1955 2/18/2014 10:49AM

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I_WILL_ROCK_125 2/18/2014 8:46AM

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MMFAREJ13 2/17/2014 10:02PM

    Good for you taking her concern in a healthy way and not letting yourself get down because of that it can be SO hard to do!

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PURPLEBEAR1963 2/17/2014 4:31PM

    Great Blog...
We should always emoticon



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MAMA_CD 2/17/2014 2:29PM

    Unsupportive people can be around us, because they don't want us to change as that might make them re-examine themselves which they don't want to do. I once, when obese shared a 2lb weight loss that I had, and the friend replied, "that's like a $2 deposit on a Cadillac. Needless to say, I proved him very wrong. Go for it...prove them wrong...let their words inspire you to succeed. emoticon

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MISSSKARLETTE 2/17/2014 11:05AM

  Sometimes people telling me I can't do something pushes me to do it just to prove them wrong

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HAVASUJULES 2/17/2014 10:49AM

    Keep your focus and GREAT attitude and you will succeed!

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CLUMBOY 2/17/2014 6:39AM

    beautiful response!

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WITHNEWEYES 2/17/2014 12:18AM

    Totally needed that! Keep up the good work!

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EMMACORY 2/16/2014 10:42PM

    It is about progress not perfection. Blessing on your journey! emoticon

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BESYKES 2/16/2014 9:56PM

    Keep moving forward! emoticon emoticon

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EVIE4NOW 2/16/2014 9:08PM

  What a great response. Do tell us what she warns you of when you reach your goal. Could be from all the men standing around gawking to an atomic war, but am sure she will find another doomsday lol.

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SAMMI-SAM 2/16/2014 8:58PM

    emoticon

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MOONGLOWSNANA 2/16/2014 6:59PM

  It's difficult to constantly be barraged with negative comments seemingly about everything. Your friend needs a positive example and she has that in you! She doesn't know how lucky she really is! emoticon

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VELVETDRAGONFLY 2/16/2014 6:11PM

    Great response!
I think this can inspire me to turn someone's negative into a positive instead of letting that negativity eat away at me until I give up.
Thank you for the great blog.

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GOING-STRONG 2/16/2014 5:51PM

    Your response to your friends negative reaction was fab fab fabulous!

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ROXYCARIN 2/16/2014 4:30PM

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DAWNDMOORE40 2/16/2014 1:29PM

    emoticon The idea is to stay positive and keep building on your goals! It isn't about a competition or being perfect! It's about picking yourself up and never giving up on yourself! You will get there! Just believe with your heart that you have what it takes to achieve success! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LILSPARKIE85 2/16/2014 1:29PM

    Such a good answer!

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DUSTYPRAIRIE 2/16/2014 11:27AM

    Sparkers know better and we keep picking ourselves up and going forward.

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ROX525 2/16/2014 6:40AM

    You can me an entire new perspective. Thank you. We have a couple that walks in all sorts of weather. They amaze me.

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MCFITZ2 2/16/2014 2:10AM

    I applaud you. It would have been so easy to have a knee jerk reaction to either totally accept the comment as a put down and feel defeated or blow up at your friend.
Congratulations for preserving your goals and friendship. emoticon

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AJB121299 2/15/2014 11:50PM

    nice

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GRNSEAS7 2/15/2014 11:21PM

    Wow, you are so wise. I would have taken the comment the wrong way. I would have let it eat at me for days. I love your positive attitude. Your blog is exactly what I needed to read tonight.

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PBROWN5110 2/15/2014 10:28PM

  I'm still bugged about the checkout person at Barnes & Noble who looked at the Fitness magazine I was buying and said something like "We'll never look like that." I was so stunned I didn't say anything then, but wish I'd said something like, "I can't sound like Whitney Houston either, but that doesn't mean that I don't sing." You actually said it! Yay for you!

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DONNAMAXX 2/15/2014 8:24PM

  Great response. My first thought was "what a negative comment". But I loved how you turned it into a positive!

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VICKI-B-N-FLA 2/15/2014 4:51PM

    Sometimes we have to push ourselves harder than others feel we should to reach the point where we need to be. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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FADNAK 2/15/2014 3:55PM

    What an awesome response!! emoticon

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JUNETTA2002 2/15/2014 3:47PM

    emoticon good response

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INDY50 2/15/2014 12:10PM

    emoticon great post !

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CAJUNGANNY 2/15/2014 11:50AM

    good for you, keep putting one foot in front of the other. emoticon

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JODYANNA 2/15/2014 11:40AM

    Enjoyed your post...I have a friend like that. Kudos for taking time to think before responding...good reply. Hopefully, I will remember that when faced with negativity.

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OUATEONE2 2/15/2014 10:47AM

    Enjoyed reading your blog and can relate, although men tend to not communicate as easily about these kinds of things. emoticon

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SUNSHYNECOOKS 2/15/2014 8:42AM

    You could join them in their "crazy dedication" one morning which will do a couple of things: help you reach your goals, take a thermos of hot chocolate to share when you've all finished your trek, and meet new friends. Blessing upon blessing!

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HIKING-4-ME 2/15/2014 7:00AM

    emoticon

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KOMTRIA 2/15/2014 5:38AM

  I like how you stopped and thought about a response vs reacting.
That skill will support ypir fitness efforts. You won't be easily thrown off track by circumstances and monkey brain thoughts.

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ROXYCARIN 2/15/2014 12:41AM

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KKLENNERT809 2/14/2014 11:22PM

    I have a neighbor like that, She walks every day no matter what the weather. Some days she even walks twice-once in morning and once in evening.

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RESOLUTION2014 2/14/2014 10:11PM

    I appreciate the understanding that my friend isn't a bad person. She's going through a rough time right now, so she tends to skew to the negative. But when I was having a rough time a few years ago, she was the supportive and positive person to remind me of a hopeful future. We've been friends since first grade, and have bickered about everything from Politics to who had the better Barbie doll.

I woke up this morning feeling less than awesome, and each of you have been a bright spot in my day. I'm really happy my post resonated with you! Have a wonderful weekend :)

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LIFEINTHEZONE 2/14/2014 9:35PM

    Our friends do mean the best for us, but they only see from their perspective.

emoticon on your loving response to her!

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KNEEMAKER 2/14/2014 9:23PM

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GOLFINMOMMA 2/14/2014 8:27PM

    Nice going!i would probably have cried. But that was yesterday! Today is today and I am going to be better.

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SAMMI-SAM 2/14/2014 6:52PM

    what an effin bitch. I'd work hard to prove her wrong...... emoticon

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MONYEE 2/14/2014 5:03PM

    I really enjoyed reading your blog. I'm so glad that you really thought out not only what she said, but understood where she was coming from (a place of caring) and that your answer was PERFECT. What a great friend you are!!

I also love that you understand that it's not only the goals that are important, but the journey as well. Our goals and intentions should be the highest. We may slip and fall along the way, but we are the better for having tried. Thanks for reaffirming that for me.

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MRSRIGS1 2/14/2014 4:25PM

    emoticon

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VJH-W65 2/14/2014 3:20PM

    I have that friend and it is ME.
I NEED TO MAKE HER UNDERSTAND
and shut her up. emoticon

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ONTHEPATH2 2/14/2014 2:24PM

    Great response! I like that you actually took the time to look at that possibility and then responding. My theory is it is ALWAYS better to try to reach your goals! Our minds and bodies are usually stronger than we give them credit for! You CAN do it!!!

I too have an inspirational walking neighbor - he is now almost 90! He walks our little neighborhood almost every day, once in the morning an once in the afternoon - even in the winter (although the bitter cold kept him in a few days). He has this very cool wooden walking stick that I swear at times looks taller than him. He says he "wants to keep in good shape"!
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