Tuesday, February 11, 2014
I'm so grumpy this winter. I can just tell that I'm depressed and desperate to be outside walking again. But I draw a limit to walking outside when there is a negative sign in front of the temperature. I'm a fan of four seasons and hate that I'm so grumpy this winter. I was actually looking forward to being outside more this winter, but not when there are warnings about frostbite. I'm not that crazy!
This past weekend I went to a women's health expo in Madison, WI. Learned a lot, met some good people and also listened to the author of Wheat Belly present some of his findings and information. Learned a lot through that presentation as well. I have been abusing my body again and this makes me want to get back on track even more.
But then on Sunday I woke up really depressed. Just not caring about much, slept in, which I try not to do, and I literally did nothing all day. I didn't cook for the week, I didn't do homework, nothing. I just was a lazy bum and the result of that was a huge panic attack Sunday night. Now I'm behind for my classes and was stressing about what I was going to eat for lunch and dinner during the week. I let the stress get to me, and woke up Monday feeling terrible, sore throat, upset stomach, low temperature. So I stayed home and ate junk food. Wow, that probably really helped my problems, right?
I know what I should do on any given day, but some days I just let the depression do the deciding for me. I knew I shouldn't spend the day on Sunday playing video games and I know that if I have games on my phone, then I play them. I just can't have that temptation around me, but ever since xmas, I've had games on my phone. Bad decision.
Thinking about my decisions before choosing the bad choice is something I should do way more often. There is a book called "The best Question ever" or something like that. It teaches that you ask "Given your past experiences, your present circumstances and your future goals, what is the wise decision?" Not what is the smartest decision or the best decision, but what is the wise decision because this is not as subjective as "best" or smartest." I just ignore this because I don't want to give up my junk food again.
But I don't have a choice. My jeans don't really fit anymore and I'm not buying any clothes in bigger sizes. It's time to get my butt in gear...literally!
Have a great day everyone!