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    PIXIE-LICIOUS   140,818
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The Secret Is Out


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Monday, February 10, 2014



Today is day two of my current streak!

I've been struggling for a long time, but I have not given up. I've lost a lot of weight, and then gained some of it back. Its hard for me to admit how much I've gained back over the past 6 months, but its time to come clean. Of the 71 lbs I lost, I've gained back about 30.

Whew, it feels kinda good to just flat out admit that! I know that some people might be disappointed in me or think that I've failed. But I don't think I've failed. I messed up--big time--but I'm still here and I'm still trying. And even with the weight gain, I am still healthier than I've been in years, thanks to my workouts.



The reason I am admitting to my weight gain is because a couple of my Spark friends have privately admitted to me that they have re-gained some weight, and they were feeling ashamed and defeated. They didn't want anyone to know their weight gain secret, but they trusted me enough to let me know about it, and they asked me for support and help. And it occurred to me that maybe I could best help them by admitting my own weight gain secret.

So there it is. I've gained back a lot of weight. Its embarrassing to admit it, but its also a relief. And now that its out in the open, I am pledging to lose that weight again...and to keep going. I WILL reach my goal weight this year. I will not allow myself to keep gaining weight. I don't ever, ever, EVER want to go back to where I started. And I know what I need to do in order to keep myself going in the right direction.



I pledge right now to love myself more. I pledge to love myself enough to get back to eating healthy foods, and to staying within my calorie range. I pledge to stop sneaking junk food into the house and hiding it in the laundry room! (Yeah, I admit it, I've been doing that.) I pledge to workout every day, and I pledge to not consider it a successful day on my streak unless I've eaten right AND worked out. I also pledge to be honest about how I'm doing. No more secrets. If I mess up, I will 'fess up!

Starting today. Starting right now.




And if you've been hiding a weight gain secret, then I hope you will love yourself enough to admit it and get to work on losing that weight. You deserve to live a fit and healthy life!





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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
TERRIJ7 6/20/2014 11:09AM

    I'm glad I came across this blog because I'm in the same boat. I've lost and regained the same 30 lbs. and then some. Starting over is such a defeated feeling, but what is the alternative? I have GOT to get going again.

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CATNCAG 5/16/2014 1:21PM

    Pixie, I have been gaining & losing the same 20 pounds for a few months that's why my weight hasn't went down on my tracker. But I am determined to keep going, I will never quit & I will never gain back all of the weight that I've lost again. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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GRAMPIAN 5/5/2014 6:04AM

  G emoticon ood luck with the new streak.

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NASFKAB 3/29/2014 5:38AM

  BEAUTIFULLY PUT THANKS hugs

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MAYBER 3/19/2014 12:03AM

    emoticon emoticon

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CHRIST68 3/18/2014 12:23PM

  Thank you for sharing! I have not experienced the success that you have because I keep sabotaging myself early on. Takes me a while to try again! It helps to know that even those with more measurable success still struggle too! It is not failure if you keep trying and I am trying to remember this!


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MAMA_CD 3/11/2014 8:11PM

    I loved that, both your honesty and the motivational pics. I too gained a little last year, still in a normal BMI but too high for me emoticon

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PATTYSPENCER 3/5/2014 12:28AM

    emoticon

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AMARILYNH 2/28/2014 10:36AM

    I'd be interested to know if there is ANYONE here on SparkPeople that hasn't regained lost weight at least once in their life - I'm betting most (like me) WAY more than once! But the maintenance of lost weight IS possible - not easy, but possible! And SparkPeople is the place to be to find the support you need on your journey!! Remember my favorite two quotes: "Never, never, NEVER give up!" Winston Churchill and "Its hard to beat a person who never gives up." Babe Ruth. We can DO this!!

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LEANMEAN2 2/25/2014 5:10AM

    Perhaps I should not feel better about myself but I do after reading this. I have been kicking myself because I regained about 10 lbs.

I have stopped gaining - now I must begin losing it.


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PIGGYWAY 2/21/2014 6:21PM

  DON`T GIVE UP AND DON`T BE DOWN ON YOURSELF I GO THROUGH THE SAME THING

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EFFRAYECHILDE 2/21/2014 8:44AM

    emoticon

Pixie,

I am in the same boat as you. I lost a lot of weight last year and have slowly gained it all back through poor decisions. Thank you so much for your honesty and daily encouragement to be more than we are today both physical and mental.

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SIERRAGOLD 2/20/2014 9:55PM

    Hi Pixie!

I was wondering what your streak was about (it's day 11 now) so I came searching and found my answer here. I'm proud of you for talking about this. So many people are ashamed and there's no need for it. It's part of the process. It's probably one of the most difficult thing most of us will do. I had lost 10 pounds a couple of months ago, and I've gained it all back. I have to start over again, and your idea of this streak, with the food AND working out, is something I'm going to start myself tonight! I'm not waiting until tomorrow! It's only 7pm so I have time!

Yes... I'm going to copy-cat you! You're such a huge inspiration!

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PURPLEPEONY 2/20/2014 6:34PM

    emoticon

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JLR080500 2/18/2014 10:52AM

    Thank you for this. I needed to hear this message today!

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DEEDAYE 2/16/2014 11:17AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CELIAMINER 2/15/2014 10:22AM

    I believe in you, and I'm grateful for your courage in writing and posting this blog.

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SUPERDAD55 2/14/2014 11:35PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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AMBER461 2/14/2014 7:24PM

  Thanks for sharing.

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IMEMINE1 2/14/2014 7:16PM

    emoticon

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PLITIN 2/14/2014 5:56PM

    been there, done that... goes for almost all of us.
nothing to be ashamed of.
thanks for sharing!

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CORNERKICK 2/14/2014 1:58PM

  emoticon emoticon

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FLAGLINDA 2/14/2014 10:33AM

    Pixie There is nothing to be ashamed of. We all have had the same problems or we wouldn't even be here!. I cant tell you how many times I have lost and gained the same 30 lbs! You can do it and we are all here to help each other! emoticon

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CLAYARTIST 2/13/2014 10:08PM

  emoticon

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GOGIRL_93 2/13/2014 8:17PM

  This was a great blog entry. You are truly an inspiration! I seem to always lose a few pounds and then gain it back in a binge, usually induced by some stressful event. I never realized how awful I am at handling stress until I tried to start losing weight. I'm working on controlling my mood so that I don't blow my hard efforts any longer.

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CATHOLICCORGI 2/13/2014 7:13PM

    emoticon emoticon !!!
We're on a new streak, and we are going for progress, not perfection!
emoticon emoticon

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JERICHO1991 2/13/2014 5:48PM

    I am still working on the eating with self love.

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KICKINGKILOS 2/13/2014 3:16PM

    Thanks for sharing. I mess up and then get back. And mess up again.
I have joined your spring group thanks for having me.
But -- I have been so absent.


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JANETTEB553 2/13/2014 2:15PM

    we are only human. emoticon

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FLUTTER-BY)L( 2/13/2014 11:08AM

    "Eat like you love yourself" is going to be big for me. Thanks for writing this. I know this will free you to move forward.

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JOANNHUNT 2/13/2014 9:42AM

    YOU HAVEN'T FAILED. THERE WAS A BUMP IN THE ROAD YOUR MAP GOT TURNED UPSIDE DOWN AND YOU MADE THE WRONG TURN. YOU TURNED YOUR MAP AROUND FOUND THE MISTAKE AND MADE THE RIGHT TURN. KEEP PUSHING TO A HEALTHIER, FITTER YOU. YOU ARE AN AMAZING PERSON . YOU GO GIRL.

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PRETTYPITHY 2/13/2014 9:18AM

    You are not alone. In fact, we're in very similar boats as I am in the process of whittling off 15 of the 70 pounds I lost. It sucks -- it really sucks -- but it is so much better than the alternative, continuing to gain, feeling shame, feeling out of control. We are taking control and we will be back to where we were -- and beyond -- in no time (okay, more like several months but the time will fly by!).

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ANAWESOMELIFE 2/13/2014 8:11AM

    emoticon

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CHERYLHURT 2/13/2014 7:59AM

  emoticon

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B-LYNN1ST 2/13/2014 1:37AM

    I've gained 15 of my 53 pound loss back, but I quickly admit it and set the stage to do better things. Coming clean to yourself is the biggest step. We have to admit our failures before anyone else admits them for us. That's how I view things. So you gained 30 back -eh... You'll drop them 30 pounds plus more in no time. Just keep on sparking, doing, and believing in you. emoticon

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SUPERSYLPH 2/12/2014 11:43PM

    I know it's not big, but I gained 3 lbs in the past 2 weeks! emoticon

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LUVTOBOWL 2/12/2014 10:58PM

    It happens. You read my blog about my gain. One thing I can say is we will never give up on ourselves.

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AJB121299 2/12/2014 10:39PM

    Nice

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MAMA_CD 2/12/2014 9:00PM

    Such a common experience, thanks for sharing

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BYEFATNANNY 2/12/2014 7:17PM

    I'm right there, lost 62, gained 50. I know what to do, but seem to need a bigger "dangling carrot" than my health. I'm terrible at making goals, but obviously need one to lose it. Onward and upward! emoticon

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PROJECTLORNA 2/12/2014 1:21PM

    I have to admit that last summer when I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I lost it also. I was eating right and exercising every day then when the diagnosis hit , it was like my body failed me. I was taking care of it and had lost 45 pounds then SLAM BAM. I regained all but 4.5 pounds. I managed to stop myself short of regaining everything I had lost. Now I am back on the program and have only lost a measly 2 pounds because I have to take a drug that has a side effect of weight gain. BUT this is not going to stop me this time. If I can take a hit like that and recover, I can lose it all again and then some. emoticon

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PJB149 2/12/2014 12:25PM

    I also regained some 30+ pounds over the last 8 months. Lost job, lost unemployment, depression all combined to make me eat (my comfort go to). However, I don't feel down on myself. It is what it is. I have taken the first steps to get back on track and I know, when I do what I am supposed to do, the weight will come off.

Good luck to you. Don't be ashamed; be proud that you came back to take care of yourself.

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STACYR31 2/12/2014 12:23PM

    Good for you for getting back on track! When we moved this summer I gained back 15 lbs and I was so disappointed but not I am determined to get back on track too! Thanks for posting!

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WEGENERCS 2/12/2014 11:00AM

    Really appreciated your blog. My panic button seems to get pushed at 10 pounds. Wish it was lower than that, but happy that it works. The panic button, I mean.

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DRLMAZ 2/12/2014 10:57AM

  Hang in there

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COASTAL6 2/12/2014 10:44AM

    Thank you, for your honesty! emoticon

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HEATHER3477 2/12/2014 10:38AM

    Today is day 4 of my current streak. I lost around 25 pounds the first time and I was a very active member then somewhere along the road at the beginning of 2013, I gave up and then I would say I am going to do it again and well it would last one whole day and I was over it again. This time I said I am going to do it no matter what, I know you can do this we both can! emoticon emoticon

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MBEHNKEN 2/12/2014 10:21AM

    emoticon

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SHORTSTORY2 2/12/2014 10:14AM

    Thanks for being so honest. I think we all deal with weight gain and keep lying to ourselves until we quit again. Makes me more motivated to keep up the good work. Thanks, Eileen

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ROSEHIP:-) 2/12/2014 10:01AM

    WOW, that is one great blog!!!

Makes me want to keep focused on my health even more!!!!!!

Thank you SO much.

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