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    EVRLNGFOO   29,040
25,000-29,999 SparkPoints
nearing 5 years: mental breakdown and reflection

Tuesday, February 04, 2014

i was just going through my spark teams and leaving the teams that were inactive or didn't fit in with my lifestyle anymore. i really need to become more active in teams (and the community in general). i ran across my sp class team. i joined sp in may of 2009. i remember the day i joined. i had been reading the amazon reviews on yet another crash diet book and someone recommended sp in their review. so i checked it out. i signed up right away (it was free!) and dove into the communities. i loved it from the get go! but i didn't lose weight. i was in the process of buying a house, money was (and still is) crazy, time was not something i had a lot of (still don't) and it was just a bad timing to commit to a whole new lifestyle.
the timing of joining sp was bad. i wasn't in a place in my life where i had the funds or desire to change my whole lifestyle. now i feel as though i am, money is an issue, but i'm on a quest to prove you can eat healthy and not break the bank. but is the drive there? is the desire to jump in & succeed still there? is the shiny new thing (sparkpeople) still an option? or do i need a whole new program? do i just need to start over on sp? do i need new (not replacement!) friends?
i love sparkpeople. i know it works, but is it still working for me? have i ever given sp the chance it deserves? i weigh the same, if not more, then when i first signed up. that's not sp's fault. that's mine. i don't think i have ever gone an entire month on plan doing exactly what i'm supposed to. i did really well this past november. but then the holidays got in the way, followed by a month of sickness and now all the success i had in november is gone. i am trying to find that desire and drive i had then, but it's tough. i know winter isn't helping, but i have to overcome that. can i do this? can i give it my all in february and have success and carry that success on? or do i need a whole new shiny toy?
after rereading all that, taking a trip to the drinking fountain and staring into the cold sunshine i have come up with a plan. i'm going to focus on sp, focus on the plan. do what i know i'm supposed to do. if by may i've made no progress i will find a new toy. i will change my usage of sp. i will be more active in the community as a whole. i'll use sp as it's intended. i'll track, i'll blog, i'll chat among teams friends and message boards. i'll read and reread articles. i'll give it the chance i've never given it. come may we'll see what happens. it's not fair for me to be here if i'm not giving it my all. sp is a great program, and i'm not representing it well. that's not fair to anyone.

i think i feel better now. i didn't realize i was feeling that way. now that i've come to this realization it's time to focus on a plan. first thing i know i need to do is track. i hate sp's tracking though. i don't like spending all the time it takes to track. i don't always have computer access, especially on the weekends. plus i have a bad tendency to give up entirely when i can't track perfectly. i'm going to track every bite until friday. then i'll come up with something over the weekend. hopefully by monday i can figure out a good way of tracking that fits my lifestyle.
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUCCESS68 2/5/2014 11:43PM

    emoticon emoticon

Restarting your brain/body can be an anxiety filled time due to uncertainty. I know I hate change but I also know it is healthy. SP is a great site to start and working the plan is what yields results. I started back on my treadmill and boy has it been hard but it also feels good 10 minuets into my walk or fast pace.

So drink your water, eat large portions of high nutrient veggies with portion controlled meals and move your body. Pick someone that you admire and emulate their positive behaviors. Then modify them and make them into your own.

Always find time to do you.

Best wishes.

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NELLJONES 2/5/2014 8:30AM

    Spark or any other diet works, but only if you work it. The question is does it fit into your life? I still count exchanges and write it all down in a paper notebook because it fits my life, not because it's any better than other plans. Our bodies are all a little different, but our lives are radically different. Even if you use a different food or tracking plan, the communities here are great, and you can mix and match until you find something that works for you.

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TOWHEE 2/4/2014 10:18PM

    Before SP I set up a tracker in Excel. It totaled my calories, protein, fats, and other things that my doctor wanted me to track. It was clumsy but doable.

There's nothing special about SP's tracker or anyone else's tracker. The main point is to track. When you track you can see what you are doing and how you are doing, then when you run into a "hiccup" (all of us do), you can go back to your tracker and see what you did when YOU were successful.
I know it's time consuming. I know it's not fun. But I know that it works! And after a while, you will start to automatically grab an apple instead of a candy bar; you will choose a side salad instead of french fries; you'll be satisfied with one donut instead of two or three. It will take time. It will take patience. But you have the rest of your life, so why be in a hurry.

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PORTIAWILLIS 2/4/2014 5:04PM

    I understand exactly where you are coming from. Spark diet plan is wonderful and is the first thing I have even come close to sticking with. I had lost almost nothing after 6 months and was getting depressed. Then suddenly I realized that no 2 people are just alike. What works for one might not for another. I believe we have to listen to our bodies and be CONSISTENT. I have lost 8lbs sense January 1st. Am I perfect no just CONSISTENT with my plan. You will find what works for you if you don't give up emoticon

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    the 2 years I lost my home internet I used paper & pencil. actually, I used wordpad on the computer.

but SP's nutrition tracker is still easier for me.

it doesn't matter where or how you track - only that you try to track.

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