Monday, February 03, 2014
Wow. I fee like I've been to the moon and back over the last week or so. A week from yesterday, I flew to Orlando for a huge sales meeting (600+ people) with my company. I didn't come home until Friday night.
It was crazy. Our days started at 8am and didn't end until 10pm most nights.
I was dreading it and it turned out to be better than expected. I got to know a lot of people I had only exchanged a few emails with in the past. I felt really good and confident and it was great.
The only things I regret are not exercising, drinking too much (not drunk, just too many calories) and that's about it.
I opted out of going to the gym. It was $15 to use it and I was exhausted every morning since the days were so long. I did walk more than normal and took the stairs six flights at least three times going up.
Drinking was... hard. Open bars almost every night. The first night, I had 3.5 drinks. Night two... 1 drink. Night three... 1 drink. Night four... 3 drinks... Night five... 2 drinks.
That's a lot of drinking for me. Especially since I tend to have like... 1... every two weeks.
I truly didn't realize what was happening until I woke up Thursday morning feeling terrible because I didn't eat enough Wednesday night.
The only snacks I had... two cookies and a Nutrigrain bar. I had breakfast twice out of the five mornings. I ate decent, but not stuffed, meals at lunch and dinner. I ate dessert twice.
And I came home and weighed in... and I gained weight.
Um, yeah. Whatever scale. I hate you.
I want to go back and track my food and see what I was eating, but I'm not sure if I remember it all. Lots of protein, mostly chicken and fish. Salads. A little rice, mashed potatoes, and some veggies.
I had about 4oz of Diet Coke one day when I was sleepy. A couple cups of coffee with creamer and sugar. Mostly water though. Lots of water.
I thought I did great considering all the temptations and opportunities to eat really bad.
Still... scale... grrr...
Maybe it's false. Maybe it hasn't caught up with me.
I was surprised by how nice a lot of my clothes looked on me though. I haven't lost a lot of weight, but a lot of things look nicer on me than they did before.
Then this whole no glasses thing? Seriously, I don't remember being so confident in my appearance before. I can SEE so well and I feel... normal? I liked wearing glasses. But I LOVE not wearing glasses. I felt like glasses made me one kind of person and not wearing glasses makes me a different kind of person. I like both, but I like the new person I am better. It's all in my head, but that's okay.
It's so weird when you've been gone for awhile. I feel out of sync. I really had to push myself to come back here to update. I still need to track my food. I just... don't want to. I feel tired and a little grumpy about the scale and I just... don't want to do anything.
I will though. I will because I need to and I haven't met my goals. It's so funky when you get out of your routine though. This is one of those scary diet moments. Where I'm off the band wagon and it's starting to get away and I kind of want to give up. I'll have to run to catch up, but I certainly can do it. I swear, I keep telling myself I can do it.
I know it's not as hard as it seems. I know that in two months, if I quit today, that I will look back and be angry with myself because I was doing so well and quitting was stupid because I was closer than I thought.
Funny how you know it's true, but it's hard to believe in the moment. Going back to Curves will help. I can't quit now. I just can't.